Dragon Division Judgment

This was a sound round, and from it I think I noticed the biggest problem with the format of the tournament. There is far too much ground to cover to make the tournament as action packed as I thought. If you advance, look for updates later on.

Judgment:

Renjiro
Continuity- 2/15
Setting- 3/10
Pacing- 2/10 (Ultimately, your "writer's block" led to a loss of creativity. It was as though your posts were simply made to stay active in the tournament. If you're not having fun, just withdraw.)
Dialogue- 5/10 (Internal thoughts count, calling out Bleater's lie won you points. I simply added them to dialogue rather than action)
Action- 3/15
Persona- 4/10
Mechanics- 6/10 (You are a very talented writer)
Technique- 5/10 (Simplicity sells. Your brevity is a breath of relief when compared to other writers on the site. I suspect if your effort were slightly greater, you would have succeeded)
Clarity- 5/10
Total- 36/100 (My ultimate advice to you is this: have fun. Your writing, as I hope you now know, is very good when you enjoy what you are writing)

Streak101
Continuity- 3/15
Setting- 3/10
Pacing- 5/10 (I do think you should have moved your troops to some other areas, yet I rewarded you for keeping your story going, even if internally.
Dialogue- 4/10
Action- 3/15
Persona- 4/10 (Call me biased, but I've always been a Banda fan, but also realize that others have not. You are very consistent with your character, but fail to introduce him properly)
Mechanics- 5/10 (You've improved greatly. Avoid run on sentences, and work on your descriptions a bit more)
Technique- 5/10
Clarity- 5/10
Total- 37/100



Bleater
Continuity- 7/15 (Your introduction was certainly the most enjoyable to read, despite the fact that it was spread out over SEVERAL posts. "The Gisela" was also cute, but every Alerian general and their mothers know that Gisela is a city in Corone. Please also read my technique comment)
Setting- 6/10
Pacing- 7/10 (Fantastic movement. You made the battle for both Renjiro and Streak101)
Dialogue- 4/10 (Your dialogue, in particular the speech, was rather cliche)
Action- 5/15
Persona- 4/10 (Your character is very dryly written)
Mechanics- 7/10 (Your tense changes were finally appropriate!)
Technique- 3/10 (While I appreciate the extended introduction, and appreciate several writers who begin with similar asides--Orson Scott Card comes to mind--you have to know your setting and audience. It REALLY burned the continuity of the story to have to read on--especially in what could be the wrong order--to learn about why William was in the Gisela)
Clarity- 4/10
Total- 47/100

Bleater advances to Round Two!

Bleater gets 675 base EXP. Rewards are doubled! Bleater really gets 1350 EXP.
Streak101 gets base 100 EXP. Rewards are doubled! Streak101 really gets 200 EXP.
Renjiro gets 100 base EXP. Rewards are doubled. Renjiro really gets 200 EXP!