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Thread: April 2017 Vignette

  1. #11
    Deliver Us
    EXP: 63,334, Level: 10
    Level completed: 85%, EXP required for next level: 1,666
    Level completed: 85%,
    EXP required for next level: 1,666

    AP
    5
    GP
    6,395
    Shinsou Vaan Osiris's Avatar

    Name
    Shinsou Vaan Osiris
    Age
    31
    Race
    Human
    Gender
    Male
    Hair Color
    Brown
    Eye Color
    Gold
    Build
    6'0", 155lbs
    Job
    "Executor" (Leader) of the Brotherhood

    View Profile
    Commentary will be updated throughout the day, but for the sake of getting the results and rewards up I'll get the placings and rewards done now.

    1st - VarWenn

    There is something about the way you write that really captures both my imagination and attention, and this piece was no different.

    You told the tale of a child who wants to do nothing more than live his passion in the midst of his servent duties, accepting that the pursuit of one comes to the detriment of the other. I liked that you made the child realise that the consequences of staying up late made life more difficult for him in the long run, as a tired servant makes more mistakes, and that fear of pissing off the meaner of the three brothers was portrayed well. I liked that lessons in life could be gleaned from this.

    Mechanically speaking is where I see the most improvement in your work. Rarely do I find spelling or grammatical issues now, apart from the odd typo. You deserved to win this, although it was a very difficult vignette to judge due to the strength of all entries, so congratulations!

    2nd - Philomel


    3rd - Revenant

    Varwenn receives 200 EXP, 200 GP and 2 AP!
    Philomel receives 880 EXP, 150 GP and 1 AP!
    Revenant receives 700 EXP and 1 AP!
    JDD2035 receives 300 EXP and 1 AP!
    Sage receives 150 EXP and 1 AP!
    SirArtemis receives 650 EXP and 1 AP!
    Good for Nothing Captain receives 250 EXP and 1 AP!

    I do apologise for the tardiness of this vignette. Please check back later for commentary!

    Althanas Operations Administrator



    "When we were young, was this the dream we had? We're celebrating nothing. We need to find our way back."

  2. #12
    Deliver Us
    EXP: 63,334, Level: 10
    Level completed: 85%, EXP required for next level: 1,666
    Level completed: 85%,
    EXP required for next level: 1,666

    AP
    5
    GP
    6,395
    Shinsou Vaan Osiris's Avatar

    Name
    Shinsou Vaan Osiris
    Age
    31
    Race
    Human
    Gender
    Male
    Hair Color
    Brown
    Eye Color
    Gold
    Build
    6'0", 155lbs
    Job
    "Executor" (Leader) of the Brotherhood

    View Profile
    All rewards added!

    Althanas Operations Administrator



    "When we were young, was this the dream we had? We're celebrating nothing. We need to find our way back."

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