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Thread: Workshop: When Fates Cross Paths

  1. #1
    Der Geńchteter zerrissen
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    Shinsou Vaan Osiris's Avatar

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    Shinsou Vaan Osiris
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    Workshop: When Fates Cross Paths

    Name of thread: When Fates Cross Paths
    Name of Author: SirArtemis, Redford and Cards of Fate
    Type of Thread: Quest
    Thread Length: 24 posts
    Feedback Rewards: (Post Length of Thread/10) * ((EXP Needed to Level)*0.05) EXP
    Date Closed: 11th July 2017

    Critique Guidelines:


    1.) Standard rules for etiquette apply. No spamming or off-topic posts, no personal attacks or trolling. Focus on critiquing the thread, not the writer. Use constructive criticism and try to speak in terms of "strengths" and "weaknesses." For example: "Your story was strong, but the action seemed a little weak. Try using more adverbs to describe actions or use a thesaurus to spice up your word choice."

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  2. #2
    Member
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    jdd2035's Avatar

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    Captain Cain Jodin
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    So hi every body! This is going to be an incredibly easy workshop for me. All three of yall are veterans of writing and of Althanas in general so lets get started.

    Story Telling: The three of you as said above are veteran story tellers. Each of you contributed to the over all story adding details to the setting. Further all three of yall used third person which made knowing who was doing what really easy and my mind didn't have to shift gears going back and forth from first to third person. Redford and SirAtremis especially did well establishing the story at the start not saying that Cards didn't contribute just saying it took time for you to get traction withing the story.

    Character: To critique this is exceedingly difficult as you all have played your characters for so long that you know how to play them. There's no wavering in how your characters act in a situation unlike a new player/character tryiong to figure himself out. Each of your interactions were well written and thought out and felt natural .

    Prose: Yeah I'm not touching this one with a ten foot pole.

    I were to complain about something. I'm not so much a fan of vulgarity. I use too much of it IRL but any more curse words just kind of turn me off a bit. It's a small hypocritical gripe but there you go.

    Good story yall!
    Last edited by jdd2035; 06-15-17 at 09:12 PM.

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