Living in Sin

[Dissinger]

(Closed to Slavegirl)

The boat made its way slowly into the harbor. As it came closer and closer to the peer it was assured that its cargo had some value to the people showing up. Many were gathered at the port, family and friends of the rider's, a few men to unload the cargo. All that mattered was that the ship was there, and that the people aboard it would finally be on land again. Most were happy for the trip to be over, some were happy to just be on land again after the time it had taken. At least, one man seemed to give that sentiment.

As the ship pulled into harbor and lower the gangplank, a man had pushed through to the front. The few passengers that cared about their placing soon changed their minds seeing the rather green coloring on his face. Once the gang plank was secured, the man was down quickly before he leaned over the railing of the docks, and promptly emptied his stomach. People passed him by, ignoring the daggers on his belt, the brown hair and the stone grey eyes.

People seemed to want to forget the man named Seth Dahlios, yet he wasn't forgotten. Far from it, he was actually requested, by the ghosts that one occupied the Tower of Shadows, to try and resurrect their mistress, the Drow warrior, Ghauntyrr'stra Doafin, leader of the defunct Shadow. He agreed with those specters that came to him, and so he came. Unfortunately, the fact he had to take a ship, which he considered a sacrifice for his beloved captain.

The seasickness that he got every time was a matter of pride for him. He hated taking ships, often staying for months on the same continent simply to avoid sea travel. He had no problem on airships, or on carriages, only when the rocking of the sea hit him, did he have the motion sickness that he despised. Still retching into the ocean he gave the ship a gift as he thought bitterly, Why the hell can't I get over this damn sea sickness? Why do I have to act like a drunkard on every damn ship I step aboard?

[Slavegirl]

Where the hell is he? Natalya fumed silently, as she struggled through the crowded section of town that made up the docks. He should have shown up hours before, but no ship had come in bearing the thief. Growing irritated, she reached out a thought, extending her mind to the sea.

The former slave didn't have to look far. As she stumbled into a fishmonger's cart (who cursed her throroughly, and assured her that since she was such a blighted whore she'd never have children who weren't deformed) Natalya felt the nauseated irritation that she knew for a fact was Seth Dahlios.

Hurrying toward the pier where he would dock, Natalya tried to keep her mind off of why they were meeting once more. Their captain was dead, the Shadow leaderless, and they seemed to be the only two who actually gave a damn that she was gone. She had been more than a leader to them, and turned them into so much more than teammates. And although Natalya wasn't sure about Seth, she knew that Ghaun had filled a place in her soul that had been ripped open long before. The three of them more than the rest had been like a family, so closely knit that now there seemed to be a gaping wound that begged to be healed.

Natalya smiled as she saw the thief doubled over at the side of the pier, vomiting quite violently as a final farewell to the sea. Shaking her head, she watched quietly.

You know I could fix that whole seasickness thing for you if you wanted she said in the silence of his mind, a raised eyebrow and a wink meeting his suprised glance when he looked up.

Crossing the cobbled street, Natalya walked out onto the slick stone jetty and helped Seth to his feet, then holding him at arms length. This was the first time she'd seen him in quite a while, and a lot had happened to change the both of them.

"How are you?" she asked, "Besides the seasickness I mean."

[Dissinger]

Seth jerked his head up when he heard the voice, and turning to look he saw Natalya standing there, giving him a coy wink. Struggling to clean himself up, he sighed as he said softly, "Nah, I figure I have to be punished for something; no one ever does enough..."

He then wiped his mouth before he took a sip from his water flask. Swishing the water through his mouth he spat it into the ocean before he took a draught from it sighing. As he finally stood tall he looked at Natalya and took her figure in fully, much like she was appraising him, so was he her. While they had been the two most loyal Shadows it had been ages since they were together, and he wondered if she was coping with the death, or hiding form her grief.

Moving forward he whispered to her, "So I take it you're the only other one Septum would trust? Makes sense, we were always there...or at least we were, until I disappeared..."

He felt a pang of guilt as he remembered leaving the shadow to fully pursue his Hex Magic. It had been a rash decision made by a rash man, under horrible circumstances. It was something that had left him out of Sanctuary for so long, and alienated him from those who he once called friends when he returned. He had abandoned his family, and when he killed the biological family he had, he had nothing left except the guild and the Shadow. When Ghaun died, he even wondered if he had that, until Septum came to him begging aid.

Coughing slightly to hide his discomfort he said, "Well then, shall we?"

[Slavegirl]

"Don't feel guilty," she answered his unspoken regret, nodding toward downtown and the inn she'd rented a room at for the night, "We all abandoned each other for a while there. Ghaun never cared why, and I guess that means it isn't important."

For a few blocks they walked in silence, as was their usual way. Natalya was thinking of her own disappearance - she'd rarely been around Sanctuary when Ghaun was alive, and had no excuse other than trying to lose herself from the memories that clung to her like spider's webs. When she'd been awoken in the middle of the night by the strange ghost child, it had not helped her sense of self-loathing to lessen.

As they reached the inn, a small, rather ramshackle little place with a taproom below and only a handful of rooms above, she smiled at Seth and held the door open for him. The interior was dark, the bright sunlight from outside barely able to creep through the tattered curtains at windows that needed desperately to be cleaned. It took a few seconds for her eyes to adjust, but once they did, she proceeded to a table and sat.

"Sit with me for a moment, it'll take the rest of the nausea away," she said, motioning to a chair. "Besides, we need to catch up. What exactly do you know about all of this?"

A weary looking waitress stopped at their table with an impatiently tapping foot, her hand on her hip as though they should have ordered ages before. Natalya looked up at her with an icy glare and the woman cooled off considerably. Nodding as though in approval, the former slave looked at Seth before speaking.

"I think we need a chilled cider, something fresh if you actually have that," her words were acidic, her accent very apparent - rough and yet with a soothing lyrical turn to the ends of the words, yet few would have realized that it gave away that she was a native of Berevar. The waitress cocked an eyebrow at her, but nodded and straggled off toward the kitchen to find whatever she might have that was fresh and cold.

"Septum told me to come, but he didn't tell me what happened to her..." Natalya said softly as she turned back to the thief, her grief returning heavily and without warning, "Do... do you know?"

[Dissinger]

Seth followed her as he remained silent. She had spoken out against his fears that he harbored though hearing those words from Natalya, and hearing them from Ghaun were two entirely different things. As he sighed he entered the tavern, glad to be out of the bright light, with the nausea and the rest of the symptoms of sea sickness, a nice dark tavern was helping his headache from having to purge himself.

Sitting at the table he rested an elbow on the table and a hand against his temple, gently massaging the flesh underneath. The waitress having been dispatched by Natalya was long gone before he could order his usual, and that was fine for him. Perhaps alcohol wasn't the best choice for the situation. It was then he heard her voice the grief and anger at the death shining through her careful defenses.

Raising his eyes to her he looked deeply into them. He was searching for a moment, for a memory of their captain before he looked down, "Septum mentioned a ritual of some sort. It was something to do with a pact with the spider goddess. Other than that I have no idea what exactly happened. Damon has been missing for ages and he was the only one there at the time of death..."

Again the guilt and self loathing came to the forefront at the idea their beloved captain had been only aided by the Aegis. It wasn't that he didn't trust Damon, but rather that no shadowlings had helped. It made him angry that the family she had formed had ultimately been useless. Still he sighed as he said, "We can try the library in Ettermire, they have a few books on forbidden magic and dark pacts that might hold the answer of if we can get her back. Other than that, we would have to check every library in the world, and as much as I'd love to do that again, I'm not so well liked because of the last time I did so."

He let the mysterious words drift in the air as he sighed and continued to rub his temple. His headache was lessening, but the guilt, it never went away.

[Slavegirl]

Almost angrily, she pushed her grief away, quarantining the crippling emotion in a murky back corner of her mind. This was the way she dealt with things. How many of her emotions and memories were stashed away out of - well she'd never admit to herself it was out of fear, but that didn't matter. Natalya looked up at Seth, and managed a smile, letting her hand rest lightly on his.

"You always have had a lot of guilt and a lot of secrets, Seth," she joked lightly, trying to forget her own guilt and secrets, "And none of us have ever tried to pry into what they were. We have our own."

Raising an eyebrow, the former slave stood and stretched even as the waitress returned with the drinks. Natalya took the cups from the woman and shooed her away, much to the woman's nosy chagrin.

"So we go to the library, and hope we can find something about a pact. You think that there's a loophole or something that will let us resurrect her?"

Natalya sat back down in the chair, and propped one foot up on the table, her black leather pants creeking softly with her movement. Staring off at some point in space a few yards behind the thief, Natalya sipped at her cider while trying to figure out just how they needed to go about all of this.

"I guess," she said finally, rubbing a hand over her eyes and putting her feet back on the floor, "That I need to go up and sleep, or at least rest. I got in about an hour before dawn, and didn't manage much rest then - they were having a party here last night."

[Dissinger]

Seth felt the caress on his hand before he flexed it into a fist. A sigh escaped his lips as he raised his eyes to hers. She spoke of not prying into his life, something he knew she probably wouldn't understand. His life was not a book he generally liked being read from. The pages were written in blood, and while some of it was his own, he didn't like the way it had been written either, but that was a gripe for another day.

As she asked the question about finding the loophole he sighed as he spoke, "Not a loophole so much as finding out what it entails. A few pacts merely require balance, life for life, in which case we could find a way to bring her back. Others require a sacrifice of your soul...deadly destructive pacts, that ultimately you only use in sheer desperation. I need to know which it was."

He knew all about sacrificing the soul. For the better part of two years he had been doing it. In the hopes that he would achieve his goal however laughably stupid it was now. He had wanted to bring down the Trade Masters, to free the people of Lavinya from the slavery they had been forced into. It sent a bitter shiver down in the thief, deep under the stormy gaze of his eyes. He was an emotional wreck, Sarah's death not withstanding.

To be asked to help with Ghaun's death was just another hit to his pride. A fragile tapestry being undone by his past, by the shackles he refused to remove. Getting up he muttered an agreement with the thought of sleep before he left the cider untouched and got a key to a room. Saying a brief goodnight to Natalya he sighed as he moved to his room and unlocked the door. Moving inside he tossed his pack on a nearby chair as he looked about the quaint room.

A bed and a small chest were about the only true furniture in the room. There was a chair and a desk, but one would hardly find it comfortable to be there. It was almost as if the only things up kept were the beds in this inn, and so he sighed as he tossed his cloak onto the satchel he usually carried. Moving on he took off his vest and shirt as he let them join the growing pile of clothing. With a sigh he kicked off his boots and slid in under the covers not even thinking about the next day, he had far more pertinent problems to deal with, sleep and rest being the first ones.

~*~

As he slept he seemed at peace, if not a touch sad during the process. His form shifted this way and that on the bed. Images flashed into his mind, a knife bloodied in his hands. Last words of people he had murdered, brutally for being nothing more than his parents. The love of his mother, and the pride of his father, both intangible gifts, and both were given freely even as he destroyed his life. They kept coming disturbing his peaceful rest, and so he awoke with a start and clutched his head, breathing shallowly as he tried to blot the images out in his mind.

He couldn't escape his past.

[Slavegirl]

The bed, no matter how lumpy or filled with bugs, was a welcome sight. With a relieved sigh, Natalya shed her leathers and collapsed across the bed, falling asleep within moments of closing her eyes. Her dreams were the convoluted mists of her subconscious, meaning nothing and only vaguely entertaining, which was how she liked them.

Then they changed. Images flashed by her that she didn't recognize, and the flood of emotions that carried them was nearly overwhelming. Blood, fear, anger, faces, it flowed over her until she thought she would drown in these unfamiliar images that were not from her own past. Natalya awoke with a start, and the sickening realization that they belonged to someone that she would never wish them on - Seth.

Slipping into a simple linen shift that covered only down to her thighs, Natalya quickly rushed from her room and down the hall. The thief's door was locked, but Natalya had learned rudimentary lock-picking skills while in the Shadow and used them on the door, pushing it open to find Seth gasping in horror still in his bed.

He didn't look up at her when she entered, his hands clutched at his temples in an effort to drive the images from his mind. She knew that if they'd bothered her, they must have torn him apart. Quietly, the former slave sat on the side of the bed next to him and pulled him to her, not knowing what else to do, she just followed her instincts.

"It's okay," she cooed, tenderly brushing his hair out of his face, and rocking back and forth like one would a child, "It was a dream, and it's over now. The past should learn to stay in the past."

Carefully, she allowed her mind to merge only slightly with his, calming herself and sending those emotions over him like a heavy blanket. His breathing slowed, his heart seemed to stop threatening to jump from his chest, and he slowly relaxed.

"There now, that's better," Natalya whispered, "You better be glad I like you, I wouldn't do this for anyone else."

[Dissinger]

Seth was still fighting the images when Natalya burst through the door. His eyes unseeing as the aftershock of his nightmares seemed to come over him. He tried to pretend to be so strong, so tough, so resilient, and in the end he could never escape the fact he wasn't tough. Resilience he had, but what good was it when he would be tormented with pain he had no tolerance for? Strength was a laughable concept with him.

Yet here was the truth, laid bare before Natalya's eyes. He was nothing more than a frightened child, clutching his gift in order to survive the storm he had been weathering for the better part of two years now. It was no surprise that when confronted with the emotional thief, she clutched him to her and gently began rocking her, much like he remembered his mother used to. It helped give him strength; it helped stabilize the animalistic fear of his nightmares.

It was then he felt something burst through the chaos. It was a calm that penetrated his turmoil and brought an eye to the storm. He found himself gently clinging to her as she continued to rock back and forth with him. Lulling him into a sense of safety and security, he began to calm his breathing as it became even, his mind slowly beginning to restart. As it did so it registered the situation between them, her clad in far less than he was used to seeing, and him half undressed.

She spoke of truly liking him and something in him stirred. Emotions he had cut himself off from. It was the desire and love he held for Sarah, slowly stirring within him. Emotions repressed by the tragic encounter that left her dead at his cousin's hands. Moving his hands gently around her he began to move his lips to her cheeks and kissed them softly.

Feeling like a teenager on his first date the lips moved gently to her lips before he kissed her gently tasting her. His hands moved gently to her hips as he felt his emotions begin to take over. He was still recovering form the nightmare as his body went on autopilot, unsure of what to do, but going with what felt right. Another kiss was planted on her lips before his mind fully restarted and he realized just what he was doing and to who...

Pulling back with a knee jerk reaction he groaned as he said softly, "I'm sorry, I didn't...I mean that..." Seth was at a loss for words as he looked guiltily at Natalya, more than certain he had crossed some very large barriers, and was more than likely going to have to defend said actions.

[Slavegirl]

Natalya inhaled sharply as Seth embraced her, not sure of what to make of this reaction, and not wanting to invade his thoughts to find out. Long dark lashes closed over azure eyes that searched the thief's face, the gentle kisses to her cheeks a change from her usual experience with men.

When his lips found hers she found herself reacting pleasantly, the realization that perhaps desire was one of the many feelings they shared coming as an almost pleasant suprise. She moved her body closer to his, her breasts brushing lightly against his chest, her hands interlacing around the back of his neck. The touch of his hand at her hips, and his skin against her own porcelain thigh sent a chill through her. Perhaps it had been too long, or perhaps she hadn't quite realized that this was where she'd wanted to be.

But he pulled away abruptly, and Natalya tried to hide the hurt look on her face, her face flushed and her lips slightly parted as she breathed shallowly. She had been holding her breath without knowing it.

"You didn't what Seth?" she said, now feeling almost angry that he would play these kinds of games. She tried to remind herself that she'd probably brought it on herself to begin with, but she was still angry, "You didn't want that to happen?"

The former slave stood up, her alabaster skin still flushed pink, and crossed to the door, then turned back to Seth. She was managing finally to calm her reaction, and sighed, offering an apologetic smile.

"It's not that I didn't want it to happen Seth," she admitted finally, her voice raspy, "I guess it's more that I realized that I did."

Shrugging, Natalya turned again and stood in the doorway for a second before leaving Seth to his thoughts. Her own room seemed a lot more lonely than it had when she woke up.

[Dissinger]

He looked at her standing in the door, unsure of what to say or do. It had been the first time he had an experience like that, usually he gave himself wholly to an endeavor like that, and for him to pull back was frankly surprising. Still he knew he had to say something, if only to alleviate some of the awkwardness, "I just, didn't think it would be right to take advantage of you in your grief..."

He looked down as she left, his mind a swirling mess of chaos. He had just made out with a woman that until then he had considered more like a sister. That thought alone made the entire experience disturbing, the more disturbing fact was that she had wanted it as well. It wasn't that he didn't want her, the experience he had was far more desirable than he was willing to admit.

The truth of it was, since Sarah died, he had locked away his heart again. He still wasn't over her death, and as much as the Lavinian Mother had tried to make him be strong, he had failed horribly when he tried to protect her. A sigh left his lips as he muttered, "I'm so not in the mood for this..."

Swinging his legs over the side of the bed he sighed as he slipped on his shirt loosely covering his chest and hiding the majority of the scars and the death mark. Buttoning it here and there he closed it before he went down stairs and quickly downed a couple of drinks so that he wouldn't have to worry about dreaming. After hitting the magical inebriation point, he moved back upstairs to sleep it off.

Taking off his shirt again he sighed as he tossed it on the chair where he laid his vest and said softly, "I swear, I almost think Ghauns laughing at us..."

~*~

The next morning he awoke slightly hung over. It was how he usually started his mornings, much like he had at the Bandit Brotherhood camp. He moved quickly through the room grabbing his things before he put on his shirt and vest, laced up his gauntlets and pulled on his cloak. Pulling up the hood he looked in the mirror and sighed, trying to fix his hair a bit if only to not look completely hung over.

Moving to the door he sighed as he moved to the room he had remembered as Natalya’s before he knocked on it, “I’ll be downstairs getting breakfast. Feel free to join me…”

Though right now, he rather hoped she didn’t.

[Slavegirl]

Sleep evaded her. She laid down and closed her eyes, but her mind was spinning around what had happened with Seth and she couldn't calm herself enough to drift off. Part of her wanted to slip back into his room and finish what he started. Part of her wanted to invade his thoughts and sort through them to figure out just what he wanted. Part of her wanted to run off into the woods and never come back.

For most of the night, she sat on the bed, her head and shoulder leaned against the wall, her arms encircling her knees, blue eyes staring out the window. Nothing was going like it was supposed to, least of all this. She wondered if Seth had really thought he was taking advantage of her grief. If anything, she thought she'd taken advantage of his fear.

Three times he passed her room, twice before dawn, and the last time in the morning. This last time he knocked at her door and said he was headed down to breakfast and that she could join him. But could she? It promised to be awkward, and she really didn't know what to say or think about what happened last night.

There was little more she could do, so Natalya crawled out of bed and dressed, pulling on a fitted black velvet coat over her leather pants and vest and pulling on tall boots. As she swished down the stairs, the red lining of the coat flared around her, showing off her petite figure. Seth was sitting at a table near the edge of the room, and she somewhat reluctantly joined him.

"Morning," she said, taking a seat across from him. The former slave kept her eyes averted, her mental walls up against his thoughts and emotions. The waitress from the evening before approached them and took their order quickly, leaving them in the half deserted taproom to talk or not.

"Looks like a good day for travelling," she mumbled, trying to make small talk, still not looking at the thief. It was going to be a long day.

[Dissinger]

Seth sighed as he remained silent, the awkward night behind them as he shifted a bit. Natalya sat down and tried small talk, and Seth almost wanted to begin right at the problem. He didn't like intimidating situations, but he was truly at a loss for words. As he looked at her he couldn't help but think of how she felt, how she tasted, it was alluring to say the least. It was also something he had tried to shut down on repeated occasions. A feeling he often tried to divorce him, but couldn’t no matter the situation.

Things were always different when emotions were thrown in the mix. They had been trained Shadows, and now they were making the most out of their training. Unfortunately the taboo feeling of being together had faded so much, that it was almost intoxicating. They were no longer soldiers on the same side. Now, they were comrades in arms. They were more like friends than family as they hadn’t been forced to fight together as much as they used to. With that security went the feelings of professionalism, as Seth’s world once again showed how it spiraled to chaos.

Sighing he felt a little relief as the waitress delivered drinks. Sipping from the juice he stayed away form alcohol feeling a slight headache form the hangover he had given himself. It was nothing too bad, but enough to be an annoyance. He silently resolved to pick up a bottle of Lavinya's finest in order to let him sleep a dreamless sleep tonight. As the waitress turned to go Seth held up a hand, "A bottle of Lavinian Ale, if you have it, something as strong if you don't..."

"I'll go check, give me a second..." She said as she sashayed away.

Seth then looked outside as he said softly, "Yeah, good weather for travel, lets hope there’s no monsters in the fields today..."

[Slavegirl]

Seth got his Lavinyan ale, and they packed up their small amount of equipment and left rather early that morning. It truly was a beautiful day, cool and breezy, with high clouds that flitted over the sun sending random shadows over the pair as they walked down the quickly fading road. They made great time, although perhaps this was because they seemed to be trying to outrun the night before. They rarely looked at each other, and spoke even more rarely, simply walking through the fields always heading southward toward Ettermire.

The road had disappeared entirely by the afternoon, and as the sunset behind the mountains, showering the former slave and the thief with a jewellike sunset of crimson and amber, Natalya slowed in her constant treading. They had only stopped a few times to rest and eat a few morsels of bread and cheese, wash it down with some water and then move on. Her feet ached, her back screamed for her to sit down, and her eyes were burning now from the breeze that had been so pleasant earlier.

"I think we've got to stop for the night. There is no way we're going to make it today. And if we stop now we'll have a little while to get a fire started before it's completely dark," she said quietly, still not making eye contact with the thief as she stood still, staring into the brilliant sunset. The colors reflected in her jet black curls, setting her hair to glowing like some dark fire.

They collected firewood from a small copse of sycamores nearby, and started a cheerful fire just under the edge of the trees. Natalya sat across the fire from Seth, staring into the merrily dancing flames and nibbling absently at a piece of the ham they'd bought from the inn before leaving. They sat silently, drinking away at the bottle of Lavinyan ale Seth had managed to get from the waitress. It wasn't long before Natalya was feeling the effects of the rather stout drink, her tongue loosening a bit.

"When I was seven years old," she said quietly, "I was taken from my mother, and given to my master. That's the age it always happens. They have a ceremony, and a child becomes a slave. There is no sale, no money exchanged. It is a gift from one Yorani to another. Usually from a man to his son. I remember it so vividly. It's strange, I wasn't scared, I knew it was coming. My mother was scared, I could feel her fear from a million miles away. She was pregnant with my little sister Anya, and she watched me as I walked away to my master's tent. The only thing that scared me was the tattoo."

Natalya pulled her collar away from her neck, revealing a faded black tattoo that resembled a collar around her pale throat. With a sigh, she looked up at Seth and smiled, her eyes distant.

"You know what's funny?" she laughed, the awkwardness fading from between them with their sobriety, "Besides the things my master did to me, I never even was kissed until I was 22 years old? You're only the second person who I've ever kissed."

[Dissinger]

Seth continued to walk in silence as the awkwardness of the moment never left. He kept his eyes constantly scanning as they moved about, unsure of what laid around. His paranoia was two fold as he just kept moving, kept trying to keep his mind of Natalya. He right now had many things on his mind, and the foremost one was the nightmare only the previous night. He still hadn't gotten over it, and the fact was he needed to move on.

Soon they found themselves around the campfire. His eyes entranced by the flames that danced before him. Natalya and him had been sharing the bottle, figuring a bit of pleasantness might go towards alleviating the awkwardness. As they drank though it seemed to loosen lips as Natalya told a bit about herself. Seth felt a bit awkward about it, since he rarely opened up to anyone.

Figuring the full truth of Seth Dahlios wasn't needed he sighed as he said softly, "Lavinya isn't much better. You're either against the trade masters, or with them. If you're against them, you better be Thief's guild, or you will regret it. More people disappear that way than any other way, of course, if you're thief's guild, you're instantly a traitor and they hang you the next day when you get caught..."

He sighed as he sipped the bottle before he said, "Lost a lot of friends that way, even amongst the survivors, the ones we rescued during or before execution..." He stopped there, the memories of Sarah hitting him hard as he took another draught. Looking up at Natalya he sighed as he moved over to her side of the fire. Setting the bottle beside her he sighed as he looked at her.

"I find that hard to believe that you haven't been kissed more than twice. I think last night proved you are more than capable of finding someone, so I can't imagine the hold up on you..." He said as he felt the twinges of lust stir in him. He pushed them down as he unconsciously wrapped his arm around her waist. He was merely talking with her, not trying to get his tongue down her throat or jump in her pants.

Then again, talk was just another four letter word that ended in k. The other also meant intercourse between two people. And in the ensuing silence he couldn’t find much to talk about. Looking down he said softly, "I'm sorry for leaving you hanging there. It was just, so awkward to find myself acting like that, with the least provocation. I wasn't sure if you wanted it or not...and when you left I felt horrible."

Perhaps it was the alcohol, or the fact that he disliked having such petty guilt on his heart, but he found himself once more out on a limb. Moving forward he kissed her cheek softly, this time surer, more confident, before he whispered softly, "Let me make it up to you..." He then gently brushed his lips against hers as his other arm began to help the former gently pull her into his lap.

[Slavegirl]

It all seemed to happen in sort of slow motion, and perhaps that was just the alcohol, but Natalya found she wasn't quite as suprised this time at least. As his arms laced around her once more, she found herself leaning into him, trying not to hope that things would make it farther than they did the night before.

"We were both a bit confused last night," she said in a low voice, as much for her own benefit as for his.

Once more her eyes closed as his lips touched hers, and once more she found herself holding her breath as he pulled her closer and kissed her. This time though, she wasn't letting him pull away. She put one hand against the back of his neck, taking the kiss deeper, her other hand on his chest between them.

Their hands seemed to wander, her fingers tangling in his hair, her other hand finding its way beneath his shirt to the warmth of his skin. She turned in his lap, straddling him as they kissed, almost hungrily. Her mind was a rush of confused emotions and desires which she instinctively pushed away, no longer worried about whether this was right or wrong, or even what Ghaun would say if she could see this. They were no longer family, no longer members of the Shadow, they were simply two people who needed this to happen.

If things had seemed at first to move in slow motion though, they seemed to quickly speed up, and although Natalya would usually be the last person in the world to put on the brakes, she felt herself careening out of control. Pulling away breathlessly from Seth, she paused, searching his face. Her own was dark, the shadows hiding her features, only her eyes catching the occasional flicker of the fire behind her.

"I think," she said after she caught her breath, her face still very close to his, "I think that maybe we should get some rest tonight, and save this for a time when we're somewhere a bit more..."

[Dissinger]

There was no confusion in his actions this time. The frustration and built up tension released spectacularly as hands moved, groped, and investigated. Their lips hungrily claiming each other as he abandoned himself to her intoxicating scent, her addicting taste. The continued moving steadily towards a night of passion before she pulled back. Their eyes met and he knew what she really wanted, but her concern was rather valid. As she began to voice it he sighed as he tried to calm himself from pushing her farther.

"Comfortable?" He finished for her as he smiled. He gently pressed his forehead against hers before he kissed her once far gentler than their passionate kisses and caresses had betrayed moments before. He looked at her, before he said softly, "I can understand that, we can wait, we'll be in Ettermire tomorrow, perhaps then we can be a bit more uninhibited..."

He wanted to stay there forever. He wanted to forget the pain of losing Liliana, forget the torment of Sarah's death. He wanted to forget all his pain and try to start anew, and Natalya seemed like the one he could do that with. The closeness of their body feeling so right as he felt much more relaxed after the emotional purge that he had done with her.

Slowly peeling her body from off his, as much as it pained him to do so, he sighed as he began to grab for his pack to use for a pillow. Looking inside the thing he saw the remains of his trench coat following the fight with Letho and a few other bits of cloth, despite the fact there was the oak box that contained Ebony and Ivory in there, it would be comfortable enough tonight for their journey.

Setting the pack next to him he looked at Natalya as he laid down relaxing and leaving enough room next to him for her, inviting her to sleep with him.

[Slavegirl]

With an almost regretful smile, the former slave nodded, extracting herself from his lap and puttering aimlessly about the fire, occupying herself with picking up sticks and straightening and restraightening their gear. When all the sticks were on the fire, and all of their gear was perfectly organized and all lying in perfect parallel lines, she stopped, sighing. She needed to stop trying to run away from everything. Ghaun had told her that so many times, and all she ever did in response was pack her bags and leave again. It was what she'd done on the Doom Raider, it was what she'd done a million times when Ghaun was alive, and it was what she wanted to do now.

Natalya looked over to see Seth laying on a makeshift pillow, and noticed that he obviously intended for her to join him. Perhaps if she did that she could prove to herself that she had the courage NOT to run away everytime things got confusing, or too hard. She stood there watching him for a long while, and finally crossed back around to his side of the fire and sat down next to him.

"We'll just let fate take its toll once we get to Ettermire," she said cryptically, and laid down next to him, resting her head in the crook of his shoulder, and curling her petite body around his.

"Get some sleep, tomorrow's gonna be a long day."

[Dissinger]

The next morning Seth sighed as he awoke. Natalya was still nestled against him he groaned gently coming around and alert. He looked around the camp to see the dying fire amongst a few other things, and sighed as he carefully slid himself out from under her. putting his cloak around her to keep her warm he warmed up the fire to keep them warm and to prepare a quick breakfast as he looked at her sleeping form.

He could feel the slight hangover from drinking half a bottle of ale, but knew he wouldn't probably throw up. He had been drinking out of similar bottles for so long, a few of the thieves at the guild had often joked there was often too much blood in his system, and not enough ale. It was a rather expensive life style, but one that allowed him to sleep without guilt. He silently cursed himself for ever making Natalya have to take care of him, when he forgot to drink two nights before.

Still he quickly popped a bit of the breakfast he was preparing in his mouth before he nodded seeing it was done. Getting out a pouch to put it in he called out to Natalya, "Hey, better wake up Hun, we gotta reach Ettermire today and check out the library..."

It would definitely not be easy, as the library was in two parts. The part above ground was open to the general public, but where they were going, they'd have to go below ground and hope to evade the guards till they found the forbidden magic archives. As he looked at her form he sighed as he began to pick up a few things around the camp, including their gear, gently placing it down beside her.

Looking at the road he grumbled, "I just hope it isn't a hot day, I don't think I could take that again..."

[Slavegirl]

Most people drank to forget. It unfortunately didn't work that way for Natalya, and after the fifteenth time she found herself waking up wanting to scream, or opening her eyes to stare up at stars blurred by her tears, she decided that sleep was overrated. Midnight came and went, and dawn crept up the horizon, the pearlescent silver of pre-dawn giving way to the rosy blush of sunrise.

As she felt Seth stirring beside her, Natalya closed her eyes and stilled her breathing, curling warmly beside him. He didn't need to know she'd not slept well or at all for the third night in a row. Perhaps sleep would come welcome after the whole mess surrounding Ghaun was untangled, until then, she'd happily live without.

She let him have his time alone, a morning ritual that she found most people required in order not to be cranky the rest of the day. When he chose to he'd wake her she figured, and she was right. After a quarter of an hour, the thief plunked their gear down by her and told her they needed to be going. Continuing the charade, the former slave slowly sat up rubbing her eyes and smiled at him drowsily.

"Morning," she said and little else.

They travelled most of the day and the better part of the afternoon before they topped the rise of what seemed like the millionth hill in their path, and in the valley below them stretched a massive city. The setting sun cast an eerie glow through the gathering storm clouds and set the city aglow in what seemed like a hint to the magic that laid within.

"Ettermire?" Natalya said, although she wasn't sure if it was a question or just an observation. "I suppose we'd better head for the library right away. No sense in wasting time, eh?"

[Dissinger]

"My thoughts exactly," He said as they moved through the fields. Pushing on from where they were he sighed gently, trying to think of where to begin talking. The alcohol was gone and with it the freedom of knowing it wasn't him making the rules. He would have to come out of his shell in order to reap anything from the situation, and so he remained silent.

It wasn't that he didn't like her; last night had proven quite the opposite. Now, it was he was afraid of entangling his life with someone else. He already felt he was barely managing to stay afloat, what right did he had to ruin someone else's life by dragging them down in the mire with him? As they continued to walk the dark city came ever closer and with it his thoughts. The vault of forbidden knowledge would surely not be as easy to penetrate as it had been previously.

Still they had to go there. As he moved through the area heading towards the capital he stole a side glance at Natalya checking on her. He could almost swear he saw the cogs in her head turning but thought nothing more on it as he looked back to the capital their path finally sloping to the entrance of the city. He finally spoke as he said, "Library is near the center, and we’ll have to infiltrate the basement to get where we want to go. I need to know if you want to stay at a hotel or are you going to be in all the way?"

He finally turned to her stopping out of hearing range of the woman beside him. He realized with suddenly clarity that he knew very little about Natalya's skills other than minor telepathy. The worst part was as much as he knew about her abilities, he knew less about her. So this truly wasn't a simple question to ask. Had it been another thief, he was more than certain of the answer, but he didn't know much about Natalya other than the fact she had been a slave.

He waited for her reaction as he looked at her trying to read her face...

[Slavegirl]

"I said we didn't I?" Natalya snapped, turning to face him as he moved away from her, "You don't think I'm going to sit around like some spoiled little girl while you have all the fun do you? Besides, you can't get in there without me. And I can't get in there without you. We're Shadow, we work together no matter what."

She always got snippy right before a hit. Be it thievery, assassination, spying, it always made her snarky, and that meant she was quite abusive to those around her. It didn't matter, she made no apologies, although she did feel slightly guilty for the way she treated him. She'd make it up to him later, once they figured out how to bring Ghaun back. That had to be their first priority.

"Once we get there, we need to find somewhere very close to hide until nightfall. That isn't far off anyways," she told him, as they descended the hill into Ettermire, "From there I need a few minutes to find the guards and convince them that they should take a nap. I can do it within usually about five or so minutes depending on how many there are and how much they fight it. Hopefully it won't exhaust me too much. If it does go on without me. Otherwise, when I say go, we've got to get moving. They won't stay asleep for long."

Natalya paused, trying to figure out just how long the guards would remain unconscious. After a few moments of calculations, she continued forward, following the thief toward the library.

"I think that once we get downstairs, I'll keep them asleep while you look for what you need. That should keep them out long enough for you to find it and for us to get out. Don't worry about getting the documents. Just try to remember what you read. I can pull it from your memory later."

They were nearing the center of the metropolis, and Natalya paused, pulling Seth into an alley where the shadows crept a little more densely at sunset. As though it were part of an ancient ritual, she stepped closer to him and planted a sound kiss on his lips, letting it linger for several moments before breaking away and raising her chin to him.

"We do this for Ghaun," the former slave said quietly, her blue eyes sparkling with the strange light of the setting sun, "At any cost."

[Dissinger]

He looked at her with an eyebrow raised as she told him off. Her attitude and forceful nature almost making him smile as she asserted she knew what to do. She then continued to talk giving him a rough plan. This he nodded at liking the idea so long as he didn't have to worry too much about her. What really got him going however was the rough treatment as she pulled him almost by the collar into an alleyway.

The kiss tore through him as she let it linger. He felt himself pursuing it almost instinctively before she pulled back, muttering her oath. He wanted so badly to be with her then, but the mission came first, like it always did in the shadow. While they may not have been shadowlings when Ghauntyrr'stra was dead, they were certainly going to be so when they tried to bring her back.

He cupped her cheek as he pressed his forehead to hers and echoed softly, "At any cost..." He then pulled away form the intimate embrace feeling himself grow a bit colder. It was so much like when he and Sarah used to run the trading post, which he had to push down a bit of guilt and pain that rose in his heart because of it. It was time to do the job he had come here to do, and nothing short of divine intervention would do. As he led her to the library he looked at the ancient structure. People were trickling in and out of the halls of knowledge, some scholars others ordinary people on visit.

It was this traffic he thrived in as he walked towards the structure. Two tall spires rose up to the sky almost to rival the black palace. The building was darkly colored much like the other buildings in the vicinity so as to add to the majesty of the palace, almost letting it show its dominance over such important buildings. The library though, looked more like a temple for learning, the structure being used mainly to house dusty old tomes few people would care about.

As they entered a few guards eyed them but said nothing. The building made Seth feel nothing short of small as he walked in his boots joining the fellow echoes of the others who entered the library. Though with the day as late as it was, it seemed that the traffic in was relatively dwarfed by that going out. Only those truly in need of knowledge were entering the hallowed halls of wisdom. As they broke through the entrance they joined the dwindling trickle of people into the library.

At one point it was Said that Seth was through with libraries, however Seth knew one thing for certain. There was no better place to find such things as that which many wanted hidden. Walls seemed to be covered with book cases, and then with only a five foot clearance between them, the floor began to be covered by the book cases. Every now and then there would be a small area where a table resided, but ultimately, it was a library and there was always more bookcases to prove that fact.

Seth just walked nonchalantly as he scanned around finally seeing his target. While most people stayed clear simply to avoid the guards, they were a conspicuous presence. The guards in this case, were posted around a stairwell, which seemed to lead down into the basement. As Seth stopped he sighed throwing his voice to just next to Natalya's ear, "Think you could make them think they heard someone insult them a few rows over?"

[Slavegirl]

Natalya tried not to gape at the sheer massiveness of the library. The amazing black marble, and the ornate guards that guarded everything, and the unending flow of people in and out of the gigantic building all amazed the former slave who really felt now like the country bumpkin she'd forgotten she was. She followed Seth through the maze of bookshelves, staring up the ten-foot ladders that extended to the tops of the shelves.

It was almomst a sensory overload. The sounds of at least a dozen different languages being spoken, the musty warm smell of the books, the different titles (The Origin of Psionics, and Who Were the Yorani being two that she itched to get her hands on) stretching as far as the eye could see, it was enough to make Natalya want to give up this quest and just sit and read for as long as they would let her.

As Seth stopped before a heavily guarded staircase, he spoke and jolted Natalya from her wishful thinking. What he asked her to do wasn't hard, but it was only the easy part of what they had to do. With a sigh, she nodded and lowered her eyes to the floor as she let her mind reach out.

It brushed the guard's consciousness, and she was suprised to find that he was much more intelligent than the typical rent-a-cop that most places hired. This might be more difficult than she anticipated. Carefully she formed the voice of a weasely young male in her head, and then gently laid it across the man's auditory perception.

Is that all ya do all day, ya tub of lard? You think yer somethin' special doncha, standin' there like ya got some kinda important job goin' on there, eh?

The guard frowned, his forehead creasing as his beady eyes darted around looking for the source of the voice. Natalya smiled and allowed herself to look up at him briefly before she continued.

Yeah I'm talkin' to you. Over here ya bloody wanker, what are ya, blind? I'm right here in the Fallien Myth section. Ya really think you're gonna get me for bein' mean?

The guard snarled, and angrily marched in what he thought was the direction of the voice, his hand on his holster which contained a nasty looking pistol. Natalya nodded minutely and turned to Seth.

"We go halfway down, then I need to find the guards down there and put them to sleep before we continue," she whispered as she darted down the staircase toward the basement. After a couple of dozen steps, she paused, holding up a hand to Seth that he needed to stop as well. Their faces were lit by the lamps mounted in brackets along the walls.

"There are seven. One heading up the stairs now, two at the base, and then one at each corner of the room down there. Give me a few, I'm taking out the one coming upstairs first, then the ones at the bottom. I'll tell you to move down when I get them, and then I'll get the rest when we reach the second to last step. Any questions?"

[Dissinger]

Nodding he drew a lung popper, slowly twirling it to the point it was ready to go at a moment's notice. A soft muttering was all that he made to show his understanding as he waited tensed in the stair well. The guard upstairs was mumbling about stupid punk kids, and Seth quickly felt himself going stealthy. He wasn't sure if he could get out of the current situation without killing.

His heart was starting to pound as his hand trembled. Most that didn't know the thief might have said it was fear, but it wasn't, it was far more sadistic. The problem with being a Hex Magi, was that you never really stopped the lust for blood. It was something that was as much a part of you as anything else. He could hear the guard coming up the stairs now and he tensed like a coiled spring ready to strike.

He waited for the guard, hoping, almost pleading for him to force the thief to kill him. He crouched slightly as he moved in order to get ready to spring on the guard and kill him without a sound. Ghaun would have been proud of him to be sure, if she were alive. He still waited as he heard the footsteps softly treading their way closer. Mumbling softly he spoke, "You got five seconds before I kill him and we move on...."

He figured the warning would be more than enough for Natalya to tell him if she could succeed. However, in five seconds he would have to act, or their cover would be blown, and they would not be able to get very far in the library without being hounded by the guards. Waiting for the signal that everything was fine Seth merely tightened the grip on his kunai.

[Slavegirl]

Just down the stairs the guard could be heard sliding down the wall and onto the floor with a thud. Natalya shot an I told you so glare at Seth as she rushed down and settled the guard so he wouldn't slip any further down the steps. That was a complication they couldn't afford. It wasn't that the former slave had a problem with murder. Quite the opposite, she loved the feel of her daggers slicing into flesh, or the sound of a crossbow bolt as it settled itself in someone's spine. But dead men in a library of this importance would only draw suspicion, and she didn't want anything that pointed to them. They still had too much to do once they got what they needed.

Going down four more steps, Natalya crouched down and found the minds of the two guards at the foot of the stairs. She'd have to make them fall asleep and then quickly finish the other four before they noticed that their comrades had passed out on the job. With a touch as gentle as a breeze, she carefully pressed them into such a heavy drowsiness that they simply sighed and sat down against the wall, closing their eyes to sleep.

Down to the second to last step, the former slave leaned her head as close to the entrance of the basement as she could without being seen, and did the same for each of the guards in the corners, one at a time. She began with the closest and worked her way to the back of the room. With an exhausted sigh, that matched those of the guards who now snored quietly in their corners, Natalya stood, leaning heavily on Seth.

"Hurry now. I don't know how long they'll stay asleep, and I need to rest before I can check on them all and reinforce what I've done," Natalya told him, and then smiled weakly, "You've got ten minutes and then I'm killing them."

[Dissinger]

The guard hit the ground, and with his fall so did he sheath the kunai again. He sighed as he heard her rebuke, but said nothing, there was no point arguing it with her. The Psion was not going to change her mind in the middle of a mission; he knew that much by the amount of brass she was giving him. Still he pushed himself on as they moved, before she finally spoke more, giving him a time limit. Nodding he moved down the hallways as he checked door after door. The black magic section was not his target this time, unlike the last that had ended in four guards deaths.

Soon he found the one on Gods and their pacts. Moving in he began to trace his finger over the countless tomes. He narrowed his eyes as he moved through it slowly until with five minutes remaining he found it. A tome Dedicated to Orb Elemiire, the spider goddess. He often remembered Ghauntyrr'stra talking about Orb Elemiire and how she had cursed their house. The way she spoke however, was of utmost reverence. Opening the tome he looked through the pages before he stopped his eyes widening as he saw what had happened to Ghaun, there would be no need to get it from his mind, he had already found their answer.

Ghauntyrr'stra Doafin, was never coming back...

Moving swiftly he shoved the book back on his shelf as he moved to Natalya. With only a minute to spare he spoke shortly, "Lets go, we need to get out of here...Distract the guard upstairs and leave the guards where they are..."

He only hoped his grief didn’t shine through right now, he had to be strong, if only for Natalya’s sake.

[Slavegirl]

The thief took much less time than Natalya expected to return. She'd barely had time to check that all the guards were indeed asleep and not inclined to wake up soon, when Seth returned to the base of the stairs and with little explanation told her to leave the guards and that they were ready to go.

It was strange though, she'd never met a non-psionic who could put up walls as unassailable as Seth's now were. He was blocking her with everything he had, withholding his emotions and fears with more vehemence than even her mother had when Natalya's younger sister had first been sold to Kadran. As she followed Seth up the steps, she paused once more, holding his sleeve.

"I'm distracting him again," Natalya told the thief with a reassuring smile, and then closed her eyes. The guard was actually coming down the steps toward them, but he thought for sure he heard a woman's voice calling him. He turned back and wandered back into the upper half of the library, disappearing into the main reference section.

"Now go," she hissed, pushing Seth before her as they dashed back up the stairs and made their way back through the library as nonchalantly as possible. In silence they crossed Ettermire, finally stopping before a three story inn on a well-travelled street.

"Here looks as good as anywhere. No reason to hide," she panted, still breathless from the exertion of what she'd done to the guards. Of course, she was also tired to death from trying to penetrate Seth's mind and determine what he'd found out. Before they went inside, she turned to him and held his gaze, looking at him pleadingly.

"Seth... what did you find? I'm not stupid - you'd only be blocking me if you had something you were afraid for me to know," she told him, her fists clenched at her sides.

The crowds of people had subsided for the most part, but there were still the random merchants who had stayed late, and now they rushed past the Shadowlings giving them strange looks but continuing on their way. Natalya glared at them when their gazes lingered to long on the pair, but always her eyes returned to Seth's face.

"She's not coming back is she..."

[Dissinger]

He sighed as she asked bluntly. Nodding his head he spoke softly, "Orb Elemiire, the spider goddess, and patron god of House Doafin. She is known for bartering with her clergy to get souls immediately for the guarantee of something happening...." He stopped a bit before he tried to figure out how to tell her before he went on, "One can make a pact with her, if they desperately want something. In exchange for the event happening as promised, they give her their soul now, before they die naturally. The process is swift, with them witnessing the event unfolding, before they are killed by the Spider Goddess."

He looked deeply into her eyes as he said softly, "I'm sorry Natalya, she's beyond our reach now..." He then reached forward to pull her into a hug as he sighed closing his eyes. The pain was so fresh, so real, that he was almost feeling his emotions releasing themselves. The tears welling in his eyes as he pushed them down. Trying to be strong for her after admitting, the entire past couple of days, and the weeks leading up to them, were for nothing. They had wasted their time, and nearly killed, to find nothing that could save their captain.

He gritted his teeth as he said softly, "We tried, that’s all we can do Nat..." He opened his eyes looking down at her, the nickname lingering in the air. He had tried to remain formal when dealing with the matter at hand, but now he felt himself extremely close to Natalya, his emotions being unleashed in any way they possibly could. Cupping her cheek he said softly, "Are you going to be okay?"

[Slavegirl]

Natalya nodded, the muscle in her jaw twitching slightly as she gritted her teeth, trying not to cry. As Seth pulled her to him, she remained stiff, letting numbness cascade over her like the darkness that came with the setting sun. It seemed like the darkness came more from the knowledge that they had failed than anything else. He held her to him, but Natalya could not react, she only stood there in his embrace, staring up at the inn.

"We need to go inside and get rooms before they are all rented," she said in a rough voice, pulling away from him. It wasn't that she didn't want to be close to him now, if anything it was the opposite. She needed him so much right now that it frightened her. Avoiding his gaze, Natalya slipped through the door at the front of the inn and went to stand in line at the reception desk.

When it was her turn, the desk attendant looked between Natalya and Seth curiously and shook her head.

"We only have one room left," she warned them, "It's the honeymoon suite. And you two don't exactly look like newlyweds so you don't seem like you'd need that."

"Just give us the bloody room," Natalya snapped, pulling a small pouch from her bag, "How much is it?"

"It is four gold per night," the woman said meekly, pulling a key from under the counter, "It is the entire front half of the third floor."

Natalya counted out in silver and coppers what was the equivalent of four gold and took the key from the woman, ignoring her and Seth as she stalked away to the stairs. On her way, she stopped at the bar and leaned across to the barkeep.

"Hey, fatass, over here," she hollered at an angry looking man who waddled over and glared at her, "I need a bottle of vodka. Put it on the tab for the honeymoon suite."

She didn't really intend to drink it, but if she must she figured it was better than nothing. The numbness wouldn't last forever, and anger could only burn away one's tears for so long before they always seemed to overflow. Taking the stairs three at a time, Natalya made it quickly to the third floor and opened the only door on her left.

The room was massive, with an enormous bed, a sitting area, and even a small kitchen-like area. It was decorated all in black and white, with red accents here and there, and lit by small spinning lamps that floated near the ceiling. Throwing her bag and weapons down on the loveseat, Natalya sat on the arm and stared at her hands, waiting for Seth.

[Dissinger]

She had run into the inn in the matter of mere moments. Like a rabbit escaping its prey she had gone, had diverted herself, and stole away her pain. Seth himself knew the signs all to well, and unlike her, he didn't need to be a telepath to know what state she was in. The grief of Ghaun being dead, coupled by the fact they had failed at any attempt of rescue, meant far more pain than she was ready to deal with.

He looked at the innkeeper before he dropped a couple of gold on the counter and said, "Don't mind her, she has had to deal with a lot recently..."

The inn keeper only seemed to nod at Seth as he moved into the inn. His eyes scanned the room before they caught the distressed girl running upstairs. The crowd made it hard to get through but Seth managed it as he made it to the stairs and took his time going up there, giving Natalya the time she needed. As he hit the top of the stairs he sighed and saw the door to the suite open on the left. He closed his eyes as he steeled himself for the emotional storm he would commit himself to that night.

Moving down the hallway he entered the room and looked around. The kitchen a nice surprise as was the double bed. However, his target was soon found sitting on the loveseat. Rather, on the arm of said loveseat. Closing the door behind him he sighed as he tossed his pack onto another loveseat obviously meant for visitors for the couple, the sounds of various knives and things ringing through the air as he moved slowly over to Natalya.

Reaching her he gently placed a hand on her back as he spoke softly, "Want to talk about it?"

[Slavegirl]

She tried to hold back her tears, though they burned her eyes, but somehow the floodgates opened and she wept. There was no sobbing, no whimpering, just silent tears through tightly closed eyes. When Seth opened the door, the former slave angrily dashed away the tears and stiffened as he put his hand on her back.

Natalya turned and looked up at him, her tearstained face pale as a china doll in the twinkling lamplight. He thought she might want to talk, but she didn't really think he was prepared for what she had to say. Angry at herself for being so openly emotional, and suddenly angry at Seth, she raged at him.

"Yeah I wanna talk," she hissed at him, standing up and glaring at him, "I wanna talk about the way you do things! You were in such a god be damned hurry to get in and out of there that ... god Seth if you weren't always in such a hurry maybe you'd have done it right!"

The former slave stalked away from him, standing with her back to him once more, her fists clenched and pounding against the back of the loveseat, shaking her weapons and the vodka bottle dangerously against each other.

"In fact, I'm sure that if you'd have been there instead of off running away from your duties, maybe she'd still be alive now!" she accused him in a dangerously low voice, her accent so thick now that her words were barely intelligible. Pushing past the thief, Natalya headed for the kitchen, the vodka bottle in her hand. She paused in her destructive search for a glass, which left shattered cups and saucers on the floor, and she leaned wearily against the counter as though it were the only thing strong enough to bear the weight of her sorrow.

[Dissinger]

He had tried to be nice, be gentle. The reaction however, was far from gentle as she snapped hitting him in a few key areas. He closed his eyes as he clenched one of his gauntleted hands in a fist before he said, "Gee, I don't know, that whole, "god owns your soul" thing seemed a bit irreversible!"

The anger filtered through him as he tried to keep it in check. He had long since tried to be as humble as he could, yet when attacked on his pride, he fought back, hard. The first blow, was meant to anger, but the second, hit him in the sorest spot on his body, it took the wind from him as he leaned against the loveseat. His hand gripped it tightly the few knuckles on his hand visible being white as he fought through the weakness that over took him.

When he spoke, his voice was cold, almost devoid of emotion as he bit back, "Where were you? I don't seem to remember Septum talking about how brave Natalya was. If I didn't know any better I'd say you were running again, looking for treasure at the bottom of a bottle of alcohol!"

The words were spoken, without a second thought, but his heart tried to grip them, to pull them back in his mouth. However there they were, and they were ugly. They were horrid words that seemed to undo everything that had made the past two days bearable. He was in grief, and he was enraged. The combination causing him to lash out violently at the Psion as she carefully tried to pick the thief apart.

[Slavegirl]

"I was busy taking care of other things," Natalya lied, turning to face him, unwilling to admit that he was right, "Of course, I guess you didn't have much choice in the matter after being kicked out of the Shadow. That's a pretty serious thing Seth, I mean, Ghaun put up with most anything."

She hadn't been buried in a bottle while she was hiding, running, seeking out whatever she thought would make her whole again, she'd been buried in sadistic games. Natalya had done anything but what was expected of her, but that wasn't the point, and she hated him for calling her out. The bottle in her hand found itself smashed against the counter, and she let the shattered rim of the bottle fall on the counter as she stared daggers at the thief.

"I'm not sure what your excuse is Seth, but I'm sure you have one. You always do. Just like now, I'm sure that if you'd taken the time to look you'd have found that even if 'god owns your soul' there's always a loophole. Trust the slave on this one," she looked at him bitterly, "I think I know that no matter who owns your soul, there's usually a way out of it if it really matters. I guess it just doesn't really matter that much to you."

The only problem with her anger was that it started creating little chinks in her own walls that she'd so carefully erected, and when that happened, all the pain that she caused came flowing back on her like the backdraft of a massive fire. As Seth's hurt blazed over her, Natalya only found herself flaring hotter, her fists clenching and unclenching at her sides.

[Dissinger]

Moving forward to her he growled lowly, "I don't hide behind excuses. I don't hide period, and haven't in a long time. How about you Natalya? I didn't see you taking the reigns on this one. It was always, 'What should we do Seth?' Or, 'Okay now that you got the plan let me do my own little thing to make it slightly better...'"

He then pointed a finger in her face as he growled, "As for why Ghaun kicked me out, that’s between me and her. And I guarantee you that it’s not something I'm about to share with a pretentious bitch that thinks she can bully anyone who tries to get close around." He then dropped his hand to his side as he began to breathe heavily, the exertion of trying to keep himself in check while yelling starting to get to him. He wouldn't admit she had winded him, but He had indeed started to get tired out.

Turning to go he said coldly, "I don't even know why I bothered with you, there are far better things for me to involve myself in than some stuck up wench who thinks she knows everything..."

He felt a bit of pain in his own heart as he felt the betrayal towards Liliana in his heart. He could have easily sought her out, instead, he was throwing himself into another stranger's arms, trying to find solace in someone who didn't know, and by now probably didn't care about him. As he moved to the love seat he took off his cloak and tossed it on it as he tried to calm down. His hand going to his temple as the entire scenario was giving him a headache.

[Slavegirl]

"Pretentious bitch?" she hissed, "Stuck up wench? I'm the one who came up with the fucking plan to put the guards to sleep to begin with and you are sitting here telling me I did nothing? My god Seth, how wrapped up in your own little cry-fest are you? Is it all about Liliana and Sarah and whoever else you've fucked over in the past?"

His memories were flooding over her, but she didn't even realize it, she only felt his pain and regret and saw the faces flooding over her faster than she could keep up with them. And over them all was Ghaun, laughing through her stitches, disappointed in her little shadowlings who had now proved they couldn't do anything right at all. With a desperate cry, she crossed the room to Seth, lifting her hand to slap him.

"Just because you regret it doesn't mean you can use it as an excuse," she growled, pummeling her fists against his chest as she screamed at him angrily, hot tears streaming down her face. She didn't want to be lashing out at him, but she was scared and angry and so filled with grief that she couldn't see past anything but what she felt. And with the thief's emotions added on top of hers, it was overwhelming.

"Fuck Seth! Why can't you just..." Natalya half yelled half sobbed as she continued to weakly attack Seth.

[Dissinger]

Her words struck him in the one spot he had hoped she never would. As she attacked him both physically and verbally he groaned as he closed his eyes. She had hit him at the core, and knocked him out. Now he was more disappointed the alcohol was gone, because this fight definitely required a stiff drink afterwards. As she continued to weakly hit his chest he carefully grabbed her hands before he looked her in the eyes, his pain shining in them as he said softly, "Stop."

"We're emotional, and we're tired. I know it and I know you can feel it. So if you'd like to get the fuck out of my head, I would appreciate it," He continued once he found the courage to muster the words. It was difficult to talk when someone knew what you were feeling and thinking. The names that came from her mouth being the two he felt the most grief over. He had tried to hide the pain, yet here she was with a shovel, digging it up.

He then tried to hug her to him as he felt it might at the very least get her to stop attacking him physically. He wasn't sure what else he could do anymore; sine Natalya had him on the ropes. His sanity while strong was nearing its limits where she was concerned. Was it always this difficult to argue with a telepath? He could have sworn Logan was far easier to argue with than this. Perhaps it was the fact Natalya knew him better than Logan.

[Slavegirl]

Natalya struggled weakly against his embrace, shaking her head as she tried to get the thief out of her mind. She was exhausted from the combination of both of their memories and emotions, and it made it almost impossible to untangle their minds, and rebuild her carefully constructed walls.

"I can't..." she cried, "I can't. I can't"

It struck her deeply that she had hurt Seth so badly. While it may have been her original intention, she wished to god she hadn't now. With every ounce of mental strength she had left, she wrenched her mind from his, an action which left her gasping in his rather uncomfortable embrace.

She was still angry at him. There was no doubt about that, but there was something else. Natalya thought briefly it might be something left that she was feeling from Seth, but she decided that even if part of it was, she was definitely feeling that desire for herself as well.

Trying to distract herself from anymore urges to call him derogatory names or stir up anymore of his most painful memories, Natalya allowed her hands to find his face, and she leaned forward, kissing him almost violently, her body pressing against his. And even though she'd blocked herself into the privacy of her own mind once more, she was certain he'd be able to feel her need regardless.

[Dissinger]

The primal urges of Natalya couple by the emotional state she was in mixed to produce perhaps one of his most passionate moments. Kissing her back furiously his hands began to rove over her body. He was lost now inside her as he let himself go, the pain and the raw emotions driving him into her arms. As he continued to kiss her his hands were kneading flesh, and slowly trying to remove the offensive barrier of clothing between them.

They were on the bed now, how they got there he could only guess as he was kissing her deeply, primal. He was beyond rationality as he just wanted to be with Natalya. Her curves and her voice, her sighs and her moans pushing him over the edge. As furious as he had been early he was passionate now, feeding his emotions into it. Her needs had become his in a bizarre twist of events...

...or was it really that bizarre?

They had begun with it on the first night, and with that night the seed had been planted in both their minds. They had sought each other for comfort for this need. The second night they had only stopped because it wouldn't have been comfortable. And now here they were clawing at clothing feeling flesh and intertwining bodies. He didn't know how his heart would take this betrayal to Liliana but one thing was certain.

At that moment, he didn't care.

[Slavegirl]

A storm had been on the horizon for the past week, and it broke that night over Ettermire. A similar storm had been looming over Natalya and Seth, and at that moment, the clouds opened between them and the passion that had been pent up, let loose in thunder and lightning. The storm raged outside, the wind blowing debris against the roof, the thunder rattling the windowpanes, the lightning illuminating the bodies of the two as the thief and the former slave found themselves once more in each other's arms.

This time though, they did not hold back or seek shelter from what began between them. This time they let their desire take its course, and finished what they'd started three nights before at a similar inn on the coast. The storm outside seemed pale in comparison to the havoc they wrought in the honeymoon suite of that inn in Ettermire as their bodies slammed against each other, the walls, the bed, wherever their passions took them.

Exhausted as they were from fighting, from their grief and anger, they seemed to be fueled by their desire, and it was almost as if they borrowed strength from the storm that raged outside their window.

As dawn seeped over the horizon like milk over the edge of an overflowing cup, the storm subsided, both inside and outside of the inn. The rain slowed, and the couple within collapsed in each other's arms, their shortened breath slowing with the wind that eased off outside. They got a few hours of sleep, and sometime just past noon, Natalya opened her eyes.

Seth still slept quietly beside her, and she smiled at how childlike he looked, his face still flushed from sleep among other things. Quietly, the former slave slipped from their shared bed, pulling the tangled covers up over Seth's naked form before finding her scattered clothing and dressing slowly.

[Dissinger]

Seth remained still on the bed as he slept, having been so tired out he couldn't even begin to think about dreaming. He slept soundly even as his lover awoke and moved form the bed, and as she began dressing he finally pulled himself out of the realm of sleep. Rubbing his eyes to clear the sleep from them he grunted as he woke up, unable to remain asleep any longer.

Pushing off from the bed he grabbed some of the closer pieces of his clothing, having lost them in various ways between the two of them. Pulling them on he sighed as he laced up his gauntlets, pulled on his boots, put on the vest and slowly dressed like the man who had killed countless and was damned. He dressed the part well enough, but unlike previous times, he didn't feel it. He could only thank Natalya's stubbornness as he sighed as shrugged on his cloak.

After he was fully dressed he decided to take stock of the situation. Seeing the broken glass in the kitchen he sighed before he saw the spill of alcohol, the fumes still present to one who wished to look for it. Worst of all was the other various things that had been knocked around in their passion. The bed was one of many places they had gotten to know each other, and it was obvious form the disarray of the room. As he turned to look at Natalya he grinned slightly before he said softly, "Perhaps we should "forget" to tell them about the mess and just pay for the vodka and the room?"

[Slavegirl]

Natalya shot the thief a crooked grin, and surveyed the mess with a sigh. With a shrug, she looked back at Seth, a bit embarassed, and more than a little worried about what would happen between them after last night. Pulling the strap of her crossbow over one shoulder and picking up her bag, she nodded toward the door.

"I think they might have heard us, but we can certainly try to get out without telling them. Just make sure we leave a good tip," she smirked, opening the door and shooing Seth out, kicking a playful foot against his ass to push him out the door.

As they walked down the stairs, grief stuck its head out of the little corner she'd placed it in and reminded her it was there. It also served to remind her that being around Seth was a dangerous place to be when she felt alone. With a silent prayer to the gods of Berevar, Natalya wished safe passage for her departed leader. Lifting her chin proudly, she pushed away her sorrows for the moment, and followed Seth to the desk.

"Good morning ma'am," Natalya said in what she hoped was a cheerful voice, pulling her coinpurse from her bag and setting a few coins on the counter. The woman was giving her a strange look, and so were several of the patrons who were already downstairs for their morning consititutional. It was apparent that the shadowlings had made themselves heard the night before.

[Dissinger]

He smirked as he walked past her and even chuckled as he felt the boot unceremoniously placed upon his rear. As he moved through the door he feigned being hurt as he looked at Natalya. She was definitely a friend of his; the journey with her had proven it tenfold. As he sighed they headed down stairs making their way to the inn keepers check in desk.

As they reached the counter he moved behind Natalya and gently wrapped an arm around her waist as he smiled at the keeper. As Natalya paid for the room He reached in a grabbed a bit of gold before he dropped it with her. The keeper looked up seeing the gold before he winked and said softly, "Keep the change..."

Turning he gently lead Natalya away as he said softly under his breath, "Here's hoping..." He then moved to reach for the door. As he moved he felt something in his pocket before he stopped and turned. A small jingle was heard as the keys to the room flew through the air landing perfectly on the open book. The inn keeper looked up at him a moment but he was already turning to head out.

Inside his head he was already coming to a few conclusions, but he didn't want the inn to be the place where he voiced them, he already felt he had spent too long there. As he began to pull the door open he could only hope Natalya agreed with what he had to say.

[Slavegirl]

It was still raining outside, the remnants of the previous night's storm pouring itself out over the city of Ettermire. Part of Natalya thought it seemed like the world was crying for the loss of an amazing woman and inspiring leader. Her thoughts chased around the former slave's mind like a puppy chasing its tail, and Natalya shook her head trying to clear her thoughts.

They'd made it out of the inn without a fuss, only a few raised eyebrows and a few extra coins, and the relief of that went with them as they walked in silence down the street. She wasn't quite sure yet where either of them were going, they really hadn't planned that far.

"I know that I can't be the only one thinking this," she finally said, pausing in the busy street and turning to the thief, her hand on his arm.

Merchants rushed by holding dripping umbrellas over their heads, and mothers shoved past with bedraggled children tagging behind them, all of these giving dirty glances at the pair stopped int he middle of the road.

"And I wouldn't have to be telepathic to know that something is on your mind right now," she continued with a smile, "I'm guessing your thoughts are running along the same path as mine... or at least pretty similar."

Natalya pulled Seth over to one side, rolling her eyes at a merchant who was cursing the shadowlings under his breath as he rudely pushed his way by them. She bit her lip, her eyes searching the puddles around her feet for answers. They only held reflections of the silvered sky above, no clues to what was the right thing to do in this particular situation.

"But I'll just say it, and then you can say your part. I like you Seth. I'd even go so far as to say I love you - although not in any way that should scare you," Natalya laughed, glancing up at him with eyes so blue that they would rival the seas off the coast of Fallien, "But I don't want us to be together because of grief, or loneliness... or guilt. Maybe we should just... go our seperate ways for a while?"

She hated the thought of it. And she almost hoped he'd argue, and not let it happen. But she couldn't see herself falling in love again, or being with him for any extended period of time. She didn't even know if she'd been with him for any reason beyond lust and loneliness. Natalya didn't want something like that to be the reason she lost the friendship of the only person left in the world that she trusted. Perhaps they'd run into each other again, and they'd know the answers, but for now, maybe they just needed time to think.

[Dissinger]

He avoided her gaze as she spoke his heart sinking slightly at the words. The rain matted down his hair as he began to think about where to begin. She continued on speaking about their relationship, and it was then he figured it out. He sighed as he listened to her before he whispered softly, "As much as I hate to admit it, I agree."

The rain continued to fall as he looked in her eyes before he said a bit more boldly, "Last night, was wonderful, and for a moment, I forgot everything. However, when it all came back, I only realized my problems grew worse, never better. Its not your fault, and I don't want you to feel that way ever, its my burden, and like so much I just have to grin and bear it."

He cupped her cheek one last time before he spoke, "I'm very fond of you Nat, I'd say in another time and place, we could have been something. However, now isn't that time, nor is it that place. Perhaps down the road when the grief isn't so fresh and the pain not so numbing, it could be us..."

Pulling away he sighed as he said, "For now, I need to go somewhere and figure things out. Seems a good friend of mine gave me some good info, I've been running in a different way too long now. I have to stop and figure out what the hell I've been doing, and where I want to go next." He then winked at her before he shouldered his pack. Leaning forward he gently kissed her cheek before he whispered in her ear, "Till next time my friend..."

He then slowly pulled away from the intoxicating presence of Natalya as he started to move and head off. He had to figure things out, and go to Revan, just sit down for awhile and figure out where he had gone wrong.

[Slavegirl]

There was no telling where the thief was going. In fact, Natalya wasn't even sure where she would go. Wherever it was, perhaps apart from each other, the shadowlings would learn to cope with their grief, their self-loathing, and pehaps most difficult of all, the events that had unfolded between them since Ghaun's death.

Staring at Seth's back as he walked away, Natalya sighed. Radasanth was supposed to be nice this time of year. It seemed as good of a place as any to get her thoughts together and sort through her various conflicting emotions.

As the thief disappeared around the corner of a building, Natalya lifted her hand and waved once more as if he could somehow see her. Maybe someday they'd be fine around each other once more, but for now their attraction to each other wasn't necessarily healthy.

Buying half a dozen apples and a pack of beef jerky on her way out of town, Natalya set her sights to the south and started walking, hoping that maybe she'd run into the sea and find a ship that would take her on as a temporary crew member. It didn't really matter how she got there, or even where she ended up at this point. Just so long as she was going. For once at least, Natalya was proud to realize that she was not running away.

[INDK]

Well this went a lot smoother than I thought it would. I saw five pages and shuddered in fear. These are the times when I love brevity!

Total Score= 54 This thread really serves well as a lead in to a future story. The way you ended it begs for more.

Introduction – 4 Dissinger, did you really need to elaborate that much on seasickness in your opening post? Seeing as how unrelated it was to the story, I really think this was a case of focusing on the wrong thing. No one is going to be interested in a story about Seth throwing up. Also, I was generally unclear as to what you guys wanted to do. I wasn’t sure if the purpose of this thread was to resurrect Ghaun, or to console each other over her death.

Setting – 5 I didn’t exactly want for more, but this was a generally undeveloped device. I know that both of you know how to use setting to your advantage, I’ve seen you both do it. Therefore, I’m not going to elaborate much here.

Strategy – 0/0 Everything here was straightforward, which makes sense, this thread was about relationships and people. Therefore these points are shifted over to character.

Dialogue – 7 See my notes in Character and Writing Style.

Character – 11/20 At the beginning the characters here seemed to have two separate strands of emotions that didn’t seem all that linked to each other (either sexual tension or sadness). It almost felt as if both of you switched between two one dimensional emotions. There was some backstory here from time to time, but the characters still came off flat. Things improved after you found out what happened to Ghaun, and good dialogue and interplay was the biggest reason for this.

Rising Action – 4 This thread just moved quite slow. Too much talk not enough rock. The character in the early going was not strong enough to carry a slower moving plot.

Climax – 3 Neither the parting nor the two characters together really had a climactic feel to it. The former was certainly sad, and I was rooting for the other to happen, but a good climax generally needs to be built up a little more. Yes I knew they were going to get together, but you didn’t make me root for it in any way. Forshadowing might have helped if you’d wanted to make the latter a climax, but it just didn’t work.

Conclusion – 8 The end did have the feel of a sad morning after at a time when I really didn’t want there to be one for either of the characters. It really had me feeling for them.

Writing Style – 7 You guys did really well with tone. I also appreciate how much you said through spoken dialogue.

Wild Card – 5 No real comments beyond what I’ve said before. I really do hope there is some kind of sequel. I’d appreciate one of you PMing me if its out. I’d like to read it.

Spoils=
Dissinger receives 1200 EXP and 300 GP
Slavegirl receives 900 EXP and 300 GP

(EXP difference is meant to reflect difference in levels)

[Thoracis]

Rewards Added!