Mistakenly Tagged <<solo>>

[A Nony Mouse]

This is my first attempt at a quest and is meant to be an introductory thread. This quest ties together my character's history and the quest he is about to embark on with Hana. More will be posted shortly, feel free to PM me with comments or concerns. Thanks!

Cage Match

Travis’ jab missed again as his opponent ducked out of the way at the last second. He winced as his knuckles scraped against the delyn cage surrounding the fight arena and momentarily lost his concentration. Turning to face his opponent too late, Travis Kiltias took a hit to his cheek that sent him reeling. Focus, he chastised himself as his opponent squared off again. He blocked a second blow aimed at his head and returned with a punishing hit to his opponent’s stomach. The other man doubled over in pain and Travis rained punch after punch on his exposed back. It didn’t take long for the man to drop to his knees and the fight quickly devolved into a wrestling match. The crowd which had gathered to watch the fight at The Zirnden booed as the two fighters locked one another in a standstill. Sighing, because his pay was based on the fans’ reactions, Travis pulled away to get a better target. His foe didn’t waste the opening; Travis was rewarded for his efforts by a blow to the jaw. Although the world was spinning slightly, Travis stood and backed away from his opponent.

“Come on,” someone yelled loudly from the drunken crowd outside the cage. Travis shook his head as the other man scrambled to his feet. The two fighters circled one another, each looking for an opening that would end the fight. Travis faked a punch toward the man’s stomach again; forcing his foe lowered his hands in order to block the hit. But Travis lashed out with his other fist, connecting solidly with the man’s temple. His opponent’s eyes rolled back in his head as he fell back, unconscious. Somewhere, the fight master announced Travis Kiltias as the winner and called the names of the next two to enter the cage. Still slightly dazed, Travis left the arena and headed back to the manager’s booth to collect his winnings.

The manager’s cigar smoke hung heavy in the air and Travis coughed as he neared the booth. Zirnden’s champion fighter stood not too far away and he nodded as Travis passed him. Not everyone fighting in the cage came out the same way they went in; both fighters knew that. As dangerous as it was, Travis desperately needed the money. City life wasn’t as cheap as he had thought.

[A Nony Mouse]

Meeting the Gang

Travis collected his 75 GP for the night’s fight and wasted no time in exiting the fight club and taking to the streets. The cool night air chilled the sweat on his face and made him shiver uncomfortably. Making his way back to the docks, Travis reflected on the past year. On his eighteenth birthday, his father had told him to leave and become an adventurer. So Travis had left his home and began wandering. His travels had taken him through Raiaera, into Fallien, and finally to the land of Scara Brae. Tired of life in the country, he had decided to try and fit into city living. And now I’m almost broke, he grumbled to himself.

Travis rounded the corner just before the docks and inhaled deeply as the salty air hit his nostrils. Having grown up far from the ocean, Travis thoroughly enjoyed his room at The Oyster on Scara Brae’s docks. The rent was cheap, the spirits were the finest he had seen, and he shared fellowship with four other travelers he had come to think of as friends. “Some adventure,” Travis muttered. Opening the door to The Oyster, Travis nodded toward the bartender before heading up the stairs to the rooms on the second floor. He fumbled with his key and finally got the door open, despite his muscles’ efforts to deny him entry. “Evening Vana’diel,” he greeted his half-gigas traveling companion. Vana’diel was a hulking brute; standing nearly 6’6” tall and weighing over 300 pounds. The outcast had been wandering the deserts of Fallien when Travis had first found him. Overjoyed at finding someone to travel with, Vana’diel had asked to accompany Travis on his journey. Since he had no particular destination in mind, Travis had agreed. With no armor and no weapon, Vana’diel was still a force to be reckoned with and had proved immensely helpful in several tight situations so far.

“How fight go?” Vana’diel questioned in broken Common from his place on the edge of Travis’ bed.

“I won. Got 75 gold out of it,” Travis responded before flopping down on his bed. Mas Ghistre, another of their traveling group, looked up from where he was seated at the table peering over some maps of the region.

“Excellent,” the human male exuded. “That’ll be enough gold pieces to pay the innkeeper for this week.” Travis groaned at having his earnings spent so quickly and rolled over to face the wall. But he knew Ghistre was right.

Mas Ghistre had been the latest addition to the party. Travis had run into him just outside the city in a pub along the road. Ever the womanizer, Ghistre had a love of life that Travis admired and was only to happy to let the rogue tag along. His ability with the rapier and dagger were sure to come in handy and Travis planned on using his knowledge of the area when they set out again.

“Hey you two, I’m beat,” Travis mumbled. “I need to try and get some shuteye before tomorrow’s fight.” Yawning himself, Ghistre rolled up his maps and doused the lamp on the table as Vana’driel left for his own room.

Ghistre sat at the foot of his own bed and ran over the next day’s agenda out loud, “Driz is going to the Bazaar with Nic tomorrow to get a proper crossbow. Van will stay here and watch our effects. You’ll pay the rent. What am I missing?” Drizaghar Maena’triel the drow and Nicodemus the Halfling, nicknamed Driz and Nic by Ghistre, shared a room near the rest of the party. Vana’driel, or Van, had his own room because he needed both beds to fit his massive frame. Together the five companions had become a close group and each looked forward to adventuring in the future. For now though, they were more concerned with scraping by in their day to day matters.

“Oh, I have a meeting tomorrow morning with a bloke about a job,” Ghistre told his roommate. “I’ll try not to wake you.” But his last words fell on deaf ears for Travis Kiltias was already sound asleep.

[A Nony Mouse]

A Meal Between Friends

By mid-morning, Travis was awake and ready to set out into the city of Scara Brae on some errands. There was a note scrawled on the table in Ghistre’s curly handwriting: “Went to the Employment Booth. Be back this afternoon. –Ghistre.” Travis crumbled the note and tossed it in the fireplace where it would burn the next time they lit the thing. He left his room, careful to lock it behind him, and knocked on the door of the drow’s room. No answer meant that Driz and Nic had already left for the bazaar, so he knocked on the next door. Vana’driel answered and Travis invited him to breakfast. Together, the two headed down the stairs and slid into a booth.

After a few minutes, one of the barmaids came to take their orders. “Good morning, Esmerelda,” Travis said to her as she came closer. “How is my beautiful blÃ*th this morning?” He winked at her and she giggled automatically in response.

“I’m doing fine, Travis,” she told him as she smiled at the half-gigas. Unused to such attention from a female, Vana’driel blushed and averted his gaze. Esmerelda’s smile widened as she saw the brute’s embarrassment. “Aw, Van, it’s alright,” she comforted him. The added attention just made things worse and Travis came to his friend’s rescue.

“Two morning specials please,” he stated. She nodded and sauntered off to the kitchen to prepare the meals. “Van, don’t worry. She’s just flirting with you.”

The half-gigas sighed, “I know Travis. She just make me nervous.” Shaking his head in resignation, Vana’driel thought on the matter for only a few seconds. “Travis? Did you hear news about Scourge?” Travis sat up straighter and leaned in across the table. “They been making crime during day. Right in public.” The half-gigas motioned across the tavern where the barkeeper stood polishing some mugs. “Michael tell Driz and me yesterday. He say not go near City Guard.”

Travis wondered why the Scourge would be ordering crimes to be committed in broad daylight, but Michael had been a reliable source of information so far. “Thanks, Van,” he told his companion. “I stay clear of the Guard anyway.” Travis yawned and stretched his arms, trying to work out the soreness from last night’s fight. His jaw hurt where his opponent had landed a punch, but otherwise he was getting use to the physical exertion and abuse.

Esmerelda returned with their food and the two travelers dug in with enthusiasm. The Oyster had not only excellent spirits, but their cook was a gem as well. Travis was glad they had found the little tavern when they arrived in Scara Brae. Without talking, the two friends finished eating and left some gold on the table to pay for the meals. “Well,” Travis told Vana’driel. “Ghistre should be back this afternoon, but I won’t be back until after my fight tonight. Try to keep busy.” The half-gigas nodded and headed back up the stairs. Travis left the tavern and made his way through the bustling streets on the docks and into the center of the city.

[A Nony Mouse]

A Leisurely Stroll

As he walked the streets of Scara Brae, Travis Kiltias thought about how he had always pictured this ‘adventure’ his father told him about. He’d always imagined himself battling dragons, wearing gleaming armor, and wielding a legendary sword. Brawling every night in a second-rate fight club was hardly what he’d dreamt of when he was younger. What happened? he thought to himself. Travis neared the Bazaar in the center of the city and began paying closer attention to his surroundings. It was well known that all manner of cutpurses and pickpockets hung around the Bazaar looking for an idle mind to prey upon. Since he earned his gold with his own sweat and blood, Travis wasn’t about to part easily with it.

The first stall Travis stopped to admire was the festive Kastam’s Rugs. The owner, a Fallien merchant, wore attire almost as colorful and varied as his wares. “Come on over and look at my rugs!” he shouted over the din of the marketplace. “Fine Fallien rugs for any living space!” Rolls of fine carpet stood against the side of his stall and more swatches of fabric hung from the overhang above his stall. Travis nodded a polite greeting to Kastam and moved on to the next few stalls.

A small crowd had gathered around another stall and Travis edged his way in so that he could see what had caught their attention. A potter spun clay on his wheel, talking all the while of the various techniques he was using. This blend between craftsmanship and entertainment usually improved sales and Travis saw that many people had lined up to purchase some of the finer vessels. Spun and fired by the man himself, each vase or urn was hand-painted with intricate designs. Travis admired the man’s talent a bit before continuing on.

David’s Sundries, one of the first real shops from this end of the bazaar, boasted a myriad of different items. From healing salves and potions to adventuring accessories, the owner had collected items from all parts of the world. Many of his customers were collectors of rare items bent on finding their next prized possession. David was an amicable man who quickly developed a good rapport with his clients. On this particular day, his shop was busier than usual. “Morning David!” Travis called over the crowd.

“Goodday to you Master Kiltias,” the owner responded with a wave. Travis smiled and continued through the bazaar, stopping from time to time to admire a unique piece of art or a particular weapon.

Near the center of the bazaar, Travis passed a group of men walking briskly toward one of the shops lining the street. While the stalls housed temporary vendors from other regions or the countryside, the shops held the more permanent venues and the more expensive items. Most of the crowd walked leisurely through the stores, but these men seemed to have a purpose. Travis stepped aside to let the men by and continued down the street.

Moments later, he heard screaming from behind him and he smelled smoke. The men were scattering from a nearby shop and patrons yelled as the storefront was devoured in flames. “The Scourge,” the shop owner yelled as he fled his own establishment. “Burner is here!” At the name of the Scourge’s master arsonist, hordes of Bazaar patrons began vacating the streets. Vendors abandoned their wares and fled from the scene of the crime to avoid the Scourge’s attention. An alarm bell went up from another portion of the city as the City Guard was alerted of the spectacle.

Within minutes, the guardsmen arrived at the shop and began rounding up anyone still in the vicinity. Few Scourge members were left, so the bulk of the people being detained were merchants who hadn’t left their stands. “Everyone, please remain calm,” shouted an officer. “I need you all to line up against this building.” Guardsmen began chasing down civilians in the hopes that they would catch a Scourge member who had tarried too long. A group of two guardsmen and a lieutenant began walking toward Travis.

“Sorry, not going to happen, friends,” Travis apologized with mock sincerity. As they closed in on him, Travis whirled around and took off down the street. Yelling behind them for reinforcement, the three guards gave chase. Over the past few weeks, Travis had gotten to know choice parts of the city rather well. And so the traveler sprinted through alleys, across side-streets, and down main roads, leading his pursuers toward the docks. Up ahead of him, Travis could see that a large group of civilians nearly blocked the entire road. Worse, there were no side-streets between them and where he was. Thinking quickly, he climbed up a few crates that were stacked against the front of a nearby building. Grabbing onto the porch roof, he swung his legs up over the side as the guards reached the crates.

“Go around,” the lieutenant ordered one of his guards. The remaining two began lumbering atop the crates after Travis. Not eager to be caught on a rooftop, Travis ran across the porch roof and leap nimbly to the next building. He walked easily up its sloped roof as the guards behind him pulled themselves onto the roof he had just left. When he reached the peak, Travis began running again, careful to watch his footing lest he fall. The two guards, after a few moments of awkward climbing, renewed their chase in earnest. Spotting the docks not too far in front of him, the traveler ran to the edge of the rooftops and dropped down to the street below, barely avoiding injury as his feet hit the cobblestones. Cursing, one of the City Guardsmen pinwheeled his arms to keep from tumbling over the edge of the building. Unfortunately, his lieutenant crashed into him, sending the unsuspecting man over the edge and into the trash pile below.

Two down, one to go, Travis thought to himself as he raced down the street once again. It didn’t take long for the officer to catch up and begin closing in on Travis. Knowing that the man’s armor made him less agile, Travis began pushing down everything in his path to create an obstacle course for the determined Guardsman. Crates of fruit, baskets of laundry, and stacks of boxes fell down in the middle of the road as Travis tried desperately to stave off his pursuer. Finally, the lieutenant was forced to stop and navigate his way through the veritable minefield of objects before continuing after Travis. That momentary break was all the traveler needed.

With a burst of speed, Travis sprinted toward the docks and turned to go toward The Oyster. However, he suddenly realized that leading the City Guard to his room was probably a terrible idea. Without an idea of where to go, Travis stopped running and frantically scanned his surroundings. Boats, he thought in a flash of inspiration. Before the lieutenant rounded the corner, Travis had hid himself under a pile of nets on one of the many fishing boats moored to the docks of Scara Brae. All I have to do now is wait him out.

[A Nony Mouse]

Blackmail and Bounties

After hiding out for more than a half of an hour, Travis decided it might be safe to make his way back to The Oyster. He pushed the pile of nets to the side and leapt over the edge of the boat. Sitting on an overturned bucket nearby was a fisherman mending his nets. “You the one the Guard’s looking for?” the older man asked Travis, without lifting his eyes from his work.

Travis sighed, “Apparently they think I’m in league with the Scourge.” The man chuckled and set his work to the side before rising slowly from his seat.

“They sometime get to barking up the wrong tree,” he sympathized. Then his expression turned sour. “I sure think they’d be interested in hearing your side of the story though.” The man was clearly threatening to rat Travis out to the City Guard; something that he couldn’t afford. Knowing that a confrontation would draw unwanted attention, Travis reached into his coin purse and took out five gold pieces. Walking over to the fisherman, Travis placed the coins in his wrinkled palm.

Eyeing the blackmailer warily, Travis told him, “The Guard wouldn’t really be interested in me.” Both understood that the transaction was complete and the fisherman chuckled as Travis started back toward the inn.

As he entered the tavern’s lower level, Travis saw Michael beckon him over to the bar. “What is it, Michael?” the traveler asked.

“This just came in from the City Guard,” the barkeep responded. He pulled a poster from under the bar and slid it across the counter to Travis. “Wanted,” it read. “Scourge member involved in arson. Reward: 200 GP.” Below the text was a sketch of Travis and a brief description.

Travis groaned, now there was a bounty on his head in addition to his recent streak of bad luck. “When did they come by?” he asked Michael.

The barkeep began cleaning mugs and nodded to the door, “Left a few minutes before you got here. Said that they had a few suspects and they’d be staking out a few of the taverns around here. The guardsmen that came in here questioned a few of my patrons and found out where you work. He’ll be at the Zirnden tonight, Travis,” he warned. “I think you’d best skip town for a spell.”

Running his hand through his hair, Travis thought over what Michael told him. He couldn’t go to the fight tonight because the Guard would be waiting for him. However, that gave him a perfect opportunity to get out of town. If they thought he was going to the fight, he had an advantage. “Thanks Michael,” he said as he slid off the stool. The barkeep shrugged it off and turned his attention to a customer as Travis headed for the stairs. Time to continue the adventure, Travis mused as he unlocked the door to his room. Maybe it’s about time…

[A Nony Mouse]

Divide and Conquer

Ghistre was relaxing on his bed as Travis entered the room that they shared. “We have a problem,” Travis told his roommate as he bolted the door behind him. Ghistre rose to a sitting position and motioned for Travis to continue. “There’s a bounty on my head,” he summarized.

“Well done, friend!” Ghistre quipped sarcastically. “Just how did you manage that?” Travis quickly relayed the story and Ghistre shook his head in mock amazement. “At least you’re making a name for yourself, right?” he offered. Travis chuckled in appreciation and sat on the edge of his own bed. “I was thinking that Scara Brae was beginning to get a bit old anyway,” the rogue pondered. “About time for a bit of traveling?”

“Exactly what I was thinking,” Travis replied. “Any leads on quests at the employment booth?” Ghistre rose from the bed and walked over to the table, sorting quickly through a stack of parchment.

Locating the one he was after, Ghistre read, “Looking for a few hard workers to help fell a few trees; sounds easy enough. Then there’s this one: Farmhand wanted, room and board provided with minimal hourly wage. And finally we have this gem: Searching for adventurous youths to purge my property of foul beats. All in Corone… anything catch your eye?” He looked over at Travis expectantly.

Closing his eyes and thinking them over one by one, Travis’ response was slow in coming. “Doesn’t sound like any of them offer enough work for the five of us,” he reasoned. “We may need to divide the three jobs between us in order to make any money at all. Which one will you take?”

Ghistre mulled the thought over before answering, “Being a farmhand sounds too dull for me and I’m not the lumberjack type. I believe that leaves me playing the part of the adventurous youth,” he chuckled. “Van would be well-suited for the lumberjack role, I imagine. What about you?”

“Let’s see what Driz and Nic want before I claim one,” Travis said. The two companions walked to the next door and knocked. Nicodemus answered the door and invited them inside. Drizaghar Maena’triel the drow sat at the window, peering out onto the docks and mulling over his own thoughts. Typically dark and brooding, the drow rarely showed any emotion other than disdain and anger. The party had met him on their way from Fallien and the wanderer reluctantly agreed to tag along with them. They had formed an uneasy alliance, the adventurers knew they could count on his magic, but knew little else about him. “Driz,” Travis interrupted, “We found some jobs.” The dark elf stood and wandered over to stand behind his roommate. “Farmhand, lumberjack, and beast slayers… anything pique your interest?”

“Whatever involves the least physical activity,” Driz answered offhandedly. He sulked back to his seat by the window and returned to his thoughts.

Nicodemus chimed in, “Driz and I will take the beast slayer job. Are we all doing the same one?”

“I’ll check with Van, but I think we’re going to split them up,” Travis replied. “You three with clear this man’s property of beasts while I take up farming and Van tries his hand at being a lumberjack. We’ll meet up after the jobs are finished and decide where to go from there. Hopefully well have a little more gold by then.” Nicodemus nodded and returned to writing in a small ledger he kept with him. “I’m going over to Van’s now,” Travis told them. “Ghistre, would you take care of getting supplies?” The friends split up, each going about the tasks they needed to complete before embarking on their adventure to Corone.

[A Nony Mouse]

The Fate of the Five

Travis and his four traveling companions stood just outside the gate to Scara Brae. Each wore their armor and carried a small pack filled with various supplies. Travis, outfitted in his brigandine, bracers, and greaves, studied a map of the area with Ghistre. Ghistre wore a simple leather breastplate emblazoned with his family’s crest, long leather gloves, and high leather boots. His rapier and dagger were secured at his waist in their respective scabbards. Vana’driel wore no armor and carried no weapon; his strength alone was an even match against most threats. He stood and surveyed the landscape before him, glad to be free of the confines of the city. Nicodemus and Drizaghar stood next to him, Nic attempting to engage Driz in conversation while the drow ignored him. The Halfling wore iron armor, leather gloves, and iron greaves with his new steel crossbow secured at his back. A broad hat sat atop his head, tilted rakishly over one eye. Driz wore black leather armor and his lesser piwafwi, both designed to allow him to blend into shadow. He held a serpent-shaped staff in his hands; the latent magic within was some of the strongest available to his family. Unable to tap into its full potential, Driz was a formidable magic user nonetheless.

The five adventurers had each come from very different circumstances, but their purpose was now the same. Each wanted to mark his mark on history and live the adventures of the legends. However, those dreams were a long way off and didn’t come without sacrifice. The journey would be a long one and each traveler knew there would be hardships to come. For now though, they enjoyed one another’s company as they began their journey to Corone.

[A Nony Mouse]

I Wonder as I Wander

Many days had passed since the five left the city of Scara Brae. The only route available between there and Corone was by ferry and so they had bartered passage on one of the many ships traveling between the two lands. After a short trip, they landed near Gisela and had stayed a night at an inn on the outskirts of the town. Over the course of the next few days, they gradually made their way inland, guided by both Nicodemus’ knowledge and Ghistre’s maps.

“When Underwood?” Van asked the humans leading their party at the moment. Ghistre consulted his map and turned to answer the half-gigas.

“We should be there by nightfall,” he assured him. Ghistre rolled the map and stowed it in his pack once again as Travis called from up ahead. “Coming,” the rogue responded.

Travis stood in the middle of a clearing in the Concordia Forest. Mushrooms grew in the shadows of the trees and the ambient noise of the woods could be heard all around them. They had been following a stream for the past few days, but would soon have to turn deeper into the forest if they were to locate the Underwood. “I think this is the clearing on the map,” Travis told his companions as they came into the clearing. “If I’m not mistaken, this is where we head east.” Nicodemus climbed atop a nearby stump and licked a finger before raising it into the slight breeze that rustled through the leaves.

“I agree,” the Halfling stated. None of the party knew how the diminutive scholar had gleaned this information, but they deferred to his experience nonetheless. Soon the five companions had left the stream behind them and pressed deeper into the forest.

The plan was to rest for a day in the Underwood before traveling to their different job locations. Vana’driel’s job was the closest, the lumberjack’s camp being located somewhere between the Underwood and the town of Jadet. Next was the man who needed his property purged of foul beasts; Driz, Nic, and Ghistre would work near Jadet on that job assignment. Finally, Travis’ farm family lived between Jadet and the Comb Mountains so he would have to venture there on his own.

The adventurers spoke little as they traveled, each lost in his own thoughts. Travis worried over the bounty on his head, wondering what fate awaited him if he returned to Scara Brae. I don’t think that’s what Father had in mind when he told me to go on an adventure, he joked. Here in Corone he needn’t worry about the City Guard; the price on his head was too small for them to worry about finding him beyond Scara Brae’s walls. It was time for him to focus on earning some gold, making some connections, and enjoying the new country he found himself in.

With that in mind, Travis quickened his step to catch up with Ghistre and the two began exchanging tales they had heard of the Underwood.

[A Nony Mouse]

Arachnophobia

Travis warily eyed the large spider resting in a sunlight patch of moss just ahead of him. These creatures were known for their unpredictable behavior and Travis readied his pole. The rest of the party changed their course to avoid the giant arachnid and Travis slowly walked past the spider to join them. As he moved to pass the creature, it sprang into action. Legs whipped out at it lunged toward its prey, its fangs glistening in the light. Travis’ cypress pole thrust toward its eyes and connected the target. The spider fell back in pain, landing unevenly on the forest floor. He followed with a downward slash aimed at the thing’s abdomen, but it shot out from under his attack. Unable to turn in time, Travis winced as fangs bit through his boots and punctured flesh. He kicked out at the arachnid’s head and connected once again. It reeled back, giving him the opportunity he needed. Planting his pole firmly in the ground, Travis gripped in and swung his body around toward the spider. With his feet outstretched, he smashed into its head with a crunch. The spider fell to the ground, unmoving.

Picking himself up from the ground, Travis retrieved his pole and limped over to his companions. “Nice work,” Ghistre applauded him.

“Travis hurt?” Van asked as Travis removed his boot to see the damage. The wound was red and puffy, but it didn’t seem as though the spider had been poisonous.

“Van,” Travis called to the halg-gigas. “Harvest that thing’s fangs; we can sell them when we get to the Underwood.” The brute lumbered over to the spider and began pulling out its teeth. Travis opened his first aid kit and applied a healing salve to his calf. When the adventurers were all ready, Travis hoisted himself up and began walking along with the aid of his pole.

“We should be arriving at the Underwood soon,” Nicodemus informed the party and they made there way through the Concordia Forest once more.

[A Nony Mouse]

The Sands of Time

The five companions stood before The Peaceful Promenade in the Underwood and gazed in awe at the sights around them. Tall trees towered over the many shops, taverns, homes, and temples and it seemed as though the town was part of the forest. Elven design influences could be seen in all of the architecture, but the foundations of the buildings still portrayed a very human construction. Elegant designs adorned the fronts of the temples, some even with images of the gods worshipped within. The roads wound their way through the labyrinth of trees and buildings, all without seeming too difficult to navigate. Moss-covered rocks were scattered about, some resting under trees or decoratively in front of homes. And all over the town, people bustled like one giant living organism.

“Wow,” Ghistre gasped as he took in the sights of the Underwood. “I never thought it would be like this.” Even Driz looked around in admiration of the architecture he could see. Elven graces were not lost on the drow and even he enjoyed the atmosphere of the forest town. “Well, let’s try to find some information on our jobs and get a room in the Peaceful Promenade.” He and Nicodemus walked into the tavern to talk with the locals.

Travis, however, felt drawn to a store near the tavern. As Driz faded into the hustle and bustle of the streets and Van lumbered over to the lumberjack’s camp, Travis made his way toward the store across the street. A sign out front marked the establishment as a seller of sundry goods and Travis entered through the open doorway. The room was ill-lit; a few low-burning lamps cast flickering shadows on the corners of the room. Jars full of strange liquid lined many shelves with crates of dried herbs down below. A display case stood in the back near the counter, it contents shrouded by the gloom. Travis walked deeper into the store and scanned about for the proprietor. Not seeing anyone around, he continued his perusal of the items for sale.

“Findin everyting alright?” came a voice just behind him. Travis jumped slightly in fright and slowly turned to greet whoever was there. A short, dark-skinned woman stood behind the counter. She wore dyed leathers that barely covered her voluptuous form and her stark white hair was tied up on the back of her head. Piercings riddled her ears and eyebrows, the lamplight reflecting off gems, glass beads, and bone adornments on them. “Lookin for anyting in particular?” she asked her lone customer.

“I was just looking over all of your items,” he responded politely. “You have a great variety of merchandise.”

“Ay, that I do,” she whispered eerily, as if to herself. “I have someting bery special for you.” She reached behind the counter and produced a small black bag no larger than Travis’ fist. “This be someting you will need,” she stated cryptically. She tossed the bag to Travis and he caught it easily. It weighed no more than he expected an empty bag would.

“What is in here?” he asked the shopkeeper.

She smiled, showing that several of her teeth were severely discolored. “Sand,” she replied simply. “Fifteen gold.”

Travis couldn’t explain it, but he did feel as though this woman knew something about him. I can always earn more gold, he thought. And who knows, it may very well come in handy. “Here,” he said, handing over the necessary gold and placing the black bag in one of his pouches at his belt. “Thank you,” he told her.

“Don’t mention it,” she crooned. “Now away wit you.” Travis chuckled at her odd behavior and left the shop. As he walked across the street to join his friends, he pondered over the meaning of the sand and what the woman had said. I guess I’ll find out.

[A Nony Mouse]

Spoils:
- Two spider fangs: most likely will be sold at a later date unless they prove useful between now and then.
- One small black bag of sand: Will be used on a later quest if Travis can keep it.

That's all, thanks!

[AdventWings]

After a long and anticipating wait... your Judgment has been delivered.

Story

Continuity - 5

While I understand this solo quest is used as an introductory to your character and the beginning of his adventures, I find the overall development rather lackluster. The story, spanning several weeks of travel and mishaps, did not quite develop a lasting image or how it was going to affect your character in the long run. A suggestion is to find a focal point in your story and tell the story surrounding it - could be a person, could be an event or it could even be a feeling. That way, you know you also have a story you know people want to read.

Setting - 6

I love how you pay attention to developing the atmosphere of the surrounding, from the dim-lit store to the solid delyn cage bars of the Zirnden. However... I would love to see more active interaction with the surrounding in your writing, such as how slabs of ceramic roofing slid away under your feet or the damp morning dew rolling down your arm. Play around with it when you can, just make sure not to overload the readers with too much description in a short period of time.

Pacing - 5

Partly, the speed of how the story developed was just too fast and covered too much time frame with too many things going on in such a short time. You can slow things down a bit by focusing on important aspects of the story and using it as the focal point of the story. In fact, Posts #1 through #5 could be expanded into a single quest in itself. The main idea I would like to suggest is to take your time.

Writing Style

Mechanics - 7

As I know English is most probably your native language, there was nothing really out of order and you even took advantage of some advanced language structures. I would like to see more deviation from the norm now that I know you can keep sentences flowing in standard English Grammar rules, such as intentional fragmentation of sentences to create an atmosphere of urgency, stretched out words to signify hesitation or exaggerations. Play around!

Technique - 6

Much of Technigue I also covered in Mechanics. Not a lot that really stood out and I believe you could play around some more in this area. Alliteration, metaphors, simile, personifications, the works. Try them out.

Clarity - 6

The upside of not having a lot of those literary techniques? Easy to read. But~ Perhaps having very little ambiguity in story-telling is a little bad for excitement. Don't be afraid to use vague languages when you know it's going to get the readers interested. Double-meanings and inuendos seems to work well if you know where to put them.

Character

Dialogue - 6

Fairly generic in the most parts, although you did keep true to each of the character's persona. A character's dialogue can relay much more than their personality and thought processes - remember that even fictional entities have character idiosyncracies that can be expressed in their words. Like how Travis played around with the waitress in the Oyster. I would like to see more of that technique in the future.

Action - 5

I believe the interaction was a bit lackluster and fairly straight-forward. I attribute this unimpressing development in character interaction to the sped-up story.

Persona - 6

At this moment in time, the individual characters (especially the Guards) are rather flat... not intentionally an insult to your story-telling, but leaving out the physical idiosyncracies and individual personal "twitches" (such as the tendency to smoke, tugging at the collars under duress, etc) makes the character uninteresting at a passing.

Miscellaneous

Wild Card - 5

Lots of potential storylines in the making, although you could say I expected a few juicy interaction between all these NPCs. Play around some more, that's my suggestion.

FINAL SCORE – 57!

Not too bad. My first quest score a 42. :D

((Rewards + Spoils))

A Nony Mouse receives 800 EXP and, even after all the payment he made getting to Corone, Travis found that he acquired an increase of 120 GP. Oh, and you might want to look into getting that footgear repaired - Walking around with a hole in your boot is not really gonna help keep your foot smelling nice. First hand experience, don't ask. :p

...Oh, yeah. And you get the spider fangs and the black bag of sand as well. :p

Have fun~

[Witchblade]

EXP and GP added!