Dreams and Death (closed)

[Valanthe]

The red forest, a wild and dangerous place for anyone. A wolf made its way under the leaves. next to it walked a druidess, surely she of all people could survive this dangerous wood.

She walked in a green robe with gold trim, made of Vlince. Her name was Valanthe, and as she pushed her white hair back with her brown skinned hand, one could tell she was elven, that was perhaps the best definition for her race, for she was half wood elf, half drow.

She seemed to be listening to something as she made her way through the woods, a sound that only she seemed to be able to hear, for other than the normal forest sounds, there was nothing to listen to.

"Where could it be coming from, it is as I dreamed of." Valanthe asked the wolf.

Valanthe as of late, had been dreaming of a strange stone manor but not much more than a mere glimpse of what it looked like from the outside. She knew it was here, in this forest, and as she saw this strange place, she heard the ghostly sounds of music, like a wind up music box for jewelery.

The wolf, named moonbeam, looked at the druidess, her sister in spirit, if not in flesh. She couldn't hear anything she thought extrordinarily unusual. She worried her sister might be going insane.

The music box though, was exactly what Valanthe was hearing all around her. It seemed to be leading her on, through the forest. She looked up at the darkening sky, soon she would have to make camp.

Torches, a light. A city was ahead. Close to the outskirts of the forest, some small villages did exist. But this one seemed somewhat larger.

She made her way in. Perhaps she might find someone willing to give her lodging for the night. Fortune seemed to be on her side, as she found an inn called The Weary Traveler.

She hurried in, the villagers were disturbing her, with their wide vacant stares, as if they were lifeless ghosts, staring at her with pale eyes that bore dark tired circles beneath them.

The inside was dimly lit, and sparsly furnished.
"I'd like a room, please?" Valanthe asked. The innkeeper was just as creepy as the villagers. He had pale skin, and his eyes were like all the others. His clothes smelled, as if they hadn't been washed in decades.

The innkeeper didn't answer, he just stared at Valanthe. Slowly, ponderously, as though it took great effort, his left arm raised, and simply pointed down the hall. Valanthe looked in the direction, and found a room with an open door.

"I guess we'll just settle the bill in the morning then." Valanthe said.

She walked down the hall, feeling his eyes watching her go. They seemed to be hungry eyes, desiring her, not as a man desires a woman, but as the hungry desire food.

She closed the door, and found a key to lock it with on her side. She locked it, and laid upon the bed. It felt hard and uncomfortable. The room had a dresser, empty, for those intending to stay, and a window leading out.
Valanthe got up and looked in the dresser.
"I thought about staying out in the woods, but as dangerous as it's said to be, it's not a good risk, though there seems to be something, wrong, with this village, I don't know what, but it makes me wish I did." she said to moonbeam. Moonbeam whined with discomfort. She knew there was something wrong,the whole place smelled wrong, but she didn't quite know what it was.
Valanthe pulled one drawer out a little too hard, and it came completly out. She looked at the place where it went, and to her surprise discovered a secret compartment in the back of the dresser drawer slot. She reached in, and was poked by something. Drawing it out she found a little iron key.

"I wonder what this goes to." she remarked to herself. Resolving to turn it in in the morning to the innkeeper, she layed back down on the bed, and before she fell asleep, seconds before, she realised the music box had stopped playing when she entered the village.

[Valanthe]

As Valanthe slept, she had another Dream, but this one was different. She was out of her own body, watching herself sleep. Yet, she looked different, she wasn't her normal self. She had red hair, and fair white skin, she was a half wood elf, half human. Moonbeam wasn't there either.

Her attention was taken out of the inn, the villagers were all gathered for a celebration of some kind. Before a great bonfire they danced and worshipped the idol of a black horned god of some sort, unfortunatly, or perhaps fortunatly, the black horned god was hidden in shadows too deep for her to see through.

Mehre lanu tenka salmo kekquad mesheseshe alno tekwa
They were chanting in some strange language as they moved about the fire dancing in a strange ritual.

As she watched, she realised the statue was gone, and in it's place stood a man in black clothing. It had to be a man, the frame would not suit a woman in any manner. Oddly, darkness, impenitrable darkness no light could defeat covered this man, obscuring any more detail, even his heighth. This man scared Valanthe, and frightened her. She wanted to wake up. He was watching her, staring directly at her. He began to move in her direction, and she watched herself wake up in a start, and look out the window. She could see the man, but as she looked at the window, all she could see were those dancing around the idol.

She was frozen in place in terror, as she stood by her bedside, looking through transparet wall and open window to look at the man standing outside the window staring at her. She couldn't see his eyes, but she knew he was staring right at her.

As they locked eyes, monsters emerged from the dark man, horrible monsters from the nightmare realms. They ran amuck in the village, killing villagers and devouring their souls, shredding buildings and playing in the fire. She could see out of the extreme sides of her vision as the building was torn down all around her.

The other her seemed to notice The Dark Man at that moment, staring in the window at her, and she turned and ran. As she ran, Valanthe was dragged along with her, still paralyzed in fear from the gaze of The Dark Man.

Suddenly, as if dropped to the wayside, Valanthe fell over, and remained unable to move. She watched herself flee into the woods. Her gaze turned to her side, and her mouth opened in a scream that died in her throat, as The Dark Man bent over her, and put a hand over her face.

She woke up screaming in a cold sweat.

She looked around, she had been sleeping on a large rock, her back was stiff, and somewhat sore. She looked around, and got up. Around her were the ruins of what had once been a town hundreds of years ago. She looked closer at the rock she slept on. It was dark, and seemed as a sacrifical alter to some dark god. Moonbeam licked her hand, Valanthe's scream had awoken and frightened her.

She realised her held something in her hand. She looked at it, it was the iron key she had found the night before. She was confused, how could she, this place looked as if it were untouched by life for at least two hundred years. Yet here it was all the same, and she clearly remembered the inn last night.

"WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?" She screamed out loud to the world around her.

She looked at the woods around her, and realised with a start she recognised the path she had seen her otherself, the woman in her dreams flee down. Curiously, she could hear a music box coming from that direction.

[Valanthe]

Moonbeam followed Valanthe as she walked down the path. She knew this forest was different, but this area, this path, it smelled dead. It felt wrong. Something seemed to have control of Valanthe, something not of this world, and it worried Moonbeam.

Valanthe put the key she was holding in her pocket. She quickened her steps. She remembered fleeing down this path before, when her hair was red, and she was only half elven. She watched herself flee down this path, and she hurried to keep up.

Moonbeam could see the ghost of a red haired half wood elf human fleeing in terror down the path. She tripped over an exposed root, and fell over. In the same spot, Valanthe tripped and fell too. Moonbeam looked back the way they had come. Something was following them, but she didn't know what. She couldn't see it, she couldn't smell it, she only felt it's presence.

Valanthe got up, she was uninjured, she wiped her hands on her dress and continued fleeing down the path, following the Music box meleody. Why was she fleeing? she didn't remember. The Dark Man was behind her, he was coming for her, yes, that was why she was fleeing. She didn't remember, who was this dark man, what did he want, what was he anyway?

She put her hand on a young sapling next to her, to pause and catch her breath. The tree moved, and became a strange sort of wolf, and it snapped at her. She backed up in fear, her heels hit a small branch fallen on the ground. It was almost like a staff.

She picked it up, brandishing it as a weapon, and hit the wolf with it. the wolf bit the staff, and tried to swipe at her with it's claws. She swung the branch around at hit it on the side of the head.

Moonbeam looked on puzzled. Valanthe seemed to be possessed by the ghost of the woman they were following, fighting the ghost of one of the forest's natural inhabitants. She didn't even seem to be able to see Moonbeam.

Valanthe used her magic, and caused a spike of solid granite to shoot up from the ground and impale the wolf. It was a small spike, but it served it's purpose well enough. She looked behind her, and screamed in terror.

Moonbeam looked in the direction Valanthe was looking, and growled menacingly. Behind them coming around the bend in the forest, were legions of people in black robes, their hoods drawn over their faces, so no features could be seen. Each carried a lantern, and as they swung it from side to side, chanting in a bizarre man language inscence came from them, thick and black, and the black inscence clouded the sky with impenitrable darkness.

"Not The Brotherhood of Darkness!" Valanthe whined trembling. Before them came The Dark Man, walking towards them. Valanthe took off fleeing through the forest down the path. Moonbeam followed, a bit confusedly, for now she could see no difference between the spirit and Valanthe, just as she could not tell if those following them were living, or dead. Infact, they seemed to violate the natural order of existence itself.

[Valanthe]

Valanthe ran down the path in fear. She had only come to investigate the strange dreams she had been having of a house. Now she was caught up in unusual events beyond her control or understanding.

She couldn't remember, who was The Brotherhood of Darkness, why did she fear them? Suddenly she wasn't herself anymore, she was the half wood elf human. She wore a blue top and a white skirt. Her green eyes looked behind her in fear. She remembered, they came when her cousins had perferomed a dark ritual. They were a group of individuals who worshipped something called The Consuming Darkness, which was The Dark Man following her, walking calmly before the group. The darkness obscured all the details about him. How often had she tried to find out what he at least looked like? But the darkness obscured his true heighth, but he was at least 6 foot, possibly seven or more.

Moonbeam looked back as The Dark Man followed them, followed by the army of monks in black robes chanting in their strange language. She knew what good and evil was, but this strange entity following them seemed to transcend such petty definitions.

On and on they ran through the forest, and for as long and as hard as they ran, The Dark Man was still only a few footsteps behind them.

The Dark Man Valanthe remembered her cousins telling her he was a Dark God, a real Dark god, not just an evil god with a different viewpoint than the common populace. An entity that purposely and knowingly chose his path, wasn't forced down it because he was just the bad left overs of other gods.

However when he was summoned, something went wrong, he broke out of the controlling circle that sealed him as if it didn't even exist. Valanthe ran in terror from the house at that point, remembering that on Scara Brae dwelled an obscure order that worshipped The Glorious Light, which opposed Thee Consuming Darkness. But she didn't remember anymore than that, yet. The further she was lost to these circumstances, the more she seemed to be the other woman, the half wood elf human woman fleeing back towards where it all started.

Moonbeam saw a massive human dwelling ahead. She wasn't much for architecture, but she knew Valanthe and many others would've called it a Palace. It was strange, ofr she could see naught but ruins, overtaken by the forest, yet time seemed to be reversing, flowing backwards, the castle was rebuilding itself, restructuring, becomeing more than just a ghostly image against the darkening sky. As they approched, the light of day was completly blotted out, yet everything was still easily seen.

As the two approached, they could see The Brotherhood of Darkness surrounding them on all sides, how had they gotten ahead of them, were they ahead of them, or was it all an illusionary dream world? Reality was impossible to discern anymore, and both had to treat everything they saw as though it were real and true. Before them was a castle with many great towers, with many turrets coming out of the greater towers. Parapets lined the tops of the towers, overlooking the grand balconies coming out of some of the greater towers.

Flames licked at the sides of a fireplace, clearly visable through the open front doors.

She was home, with her cousins, The Havergasts. Part of Valanthe awakened from ghostly possession with the shock and realization that this was the castle she had been seeing in her dreams, the music box had been coming from within.

[Valanthe]

Valanthe entered the house in a trance state brought on by seeing something she thought she had only dreamed of before, and by the seeming possession of the spirit of the woman she had seen in the village. She took no notice of her surroundings as she walked to the fireplace, and pushed a rock, a specific rock, the grey one, three from the left, four down, on the right side. The wall next to the fireplace slid aside to reveal a stairwell going down.

Moonbeam followed Valanthe, out of loyalty alone. She whined a little every once in awhile in fear, but Valanthe seemed to pay her sister utterly no heed, as if she had ceased to exist. The entryway just inside the door was furnished with a wooden bench for visitors to sit and wait for their coach to drive up for them. Next to it was a hat rack for the hats of the esteemed visitors of this once living place. The fireplace served to keep the entryway nice and warm for all who first entered the house on cold nights, and yet, despite the fire, the house was unusually cold to moonbeam.

Valanthe walked down the seemingly endless stairs, beneath the basement, into the ground, deep below the house, as though they walked down into the abyss itself. Finally, a lit candle sat in the middle of a cavern. All around it were drawings, arcane in look, Divine in nature, but from beyond the farthest part of existence, where all things ceased to exist, and further, from the great void, where nothing existed, which was exactly what they were designed to summon, nothing. Not nothing as in they were false and therefore wouldn’t work. To the contrary, they worked, which was most unfortunate, as nothing manifested in the form of The Consuming Darkness, better known to Valanthe and the ghosts of the Havergasts standing in the room looking expectantly at her, as The Dark Man.

“Finally, our dearest cousin has returned in her new incarnation to bring us peace.” Said Lord Havergast, once a noble of this land, his family fell into debt, and a rich family bought their nobility, and all their lands. The Havergasts fled into The Red Forest where they built their manor house by hand, and sent their family far and wide researching the dark powers. Lady Havergast went as far off as Fallien, where it is said she found a hidden nameless city in the desert sands, unknown even to the locals, for one could pass over its sands a dozen times or more, and not see the city, unless one was intended to.

“Did you bring us the banishing?” Lady Havergast asked. Not much could be seen of either Havergast, their voices seemed to be the same empty hollow sound, unless one really concentrated, then Lord Havergast’s voice was a deep baritone, and Lady Havergast’s was a rich contralto. Valanthe thought it must’ve been a coincidence though, for briefly Lady Havergast completely manifested as she spoke, and she looked almost exactly like Valanthe.

Moonbeam cowered in the corner in fear. This place reeked of death. She did not want to be here. She heard footsteps on the stairs behind her, a heavy leather boot on old wooden steps. She looked, and ran, hiding under Valanthe’s dress, and inbetween her legs, almost knocking Valanthe over, for behind them came The Dark Man.

[Valanthe]

“Ahh, Lord and Lady Havergast, a pleasure to see you both again, I do hope you managed to find your way safely from the town Lady Michelle. I wouldn’t want undue harm to come to you, again.” The Dark Man said. He spoke as a normal man, but there was something in his voice, something permanent and final, something that inspired terror.

Valanthe turned to face him, stumbling over moonbeam, who hid behind her dres.
“You evil creature, what have you done to me? I came to investigate strange dreams I was having, and instead find myself in the heart of a ghost story.” Valanthe spat at The Dark Man.

“Evil? Death? Come now, I’m beyond such petty concepts. Perhaps you don’t remember, perhaps your soul hasn’t remembered yet, remembered the events that transpired this night, over two hundred years ago. Allow me then, to refresh you memory, as I tell you what has caused all this to be.

The date, not even I remember, and it is of no consequence. Your cousin, Lord Havergast had finally succeeded in learning the summoning rituals to bring about the end of those who bought you family nobility. But he performed the wrong ritual, and opened instead a gateway to my house, the place which is no place. Having pity on the poor man, I brought him back, and came with him, to insure he did the right ritual this time. However mine hated enemy had entered the room as I returned and viciously did attack me without warrant. He’ll tell you it was I who attacked, laying to waste all around me, and that he sought to stop me, but Omnisource has always been the greatest of all deceivers. He attacked, killing the Havergasts even as you fled the house, enraged as he was at my release from my self-imposed imprisonment. We caught up to you both of us, I tried to tell you of a secret I needed to find, a great thing beyond comparison, an object which if destroyed, would destroy the Omnisource, and allow me to rule with a fair and just hand for all eternity unopposed by any. However Omni snatched you up in your arms, and took you away.

I searched the length and breadth of this world, desiring to find you before was poisoned against me. One night, after I had taught a nearby village how to worship me, I discovered at last your presence, what luck to find you nearby in the inn. I stood outside your window saddened because I could see Omni’s glow around you, he had turned you into one of his own. You awoke, saw me, and fled in fright, I chased, wanting to apologize for frightening you, but you ran in terror. You ran, and I chased, on and on we went, until finally, you returned here, to Havergast Manor, though I knew it was not your intent. You fled back here, desireing to do the most hateful of things to me, and banish me from this beautiful world, to keep me from improving it, to spread everlasting darkness over it, and change it, so no one ever has to see ugliness again. I only desire to help, why do you insist on opposing me I asked you as I returned to this room. You placed a single lit candle on the floor in the center where I had appeared, a cangle lit by Omni’s light. Weakened, and with my very being threatened, I was forced to kill you. Lamenting over my actions, I immediately set to work to reincarnate your soul, give you new life. Lady Havergast had survived the attack of Omni, by some dark miracle. It was to her belly I commended your soul, to wait until you could be given flesh, and born again.” The Dark Man said.

Valanthe shook her head, it was as though a dense black fog had entered her mind, obscuring her thoughts, clouding her judgment.
“Yes, of course your right, poor man.” Valanthe said in a calm sympathetic tone.
Omni, Light of my life, guardian of my soul, help me, some force seeks to control my mind
The thought raced through her mind, one desperate plea for help, before she was completely overtaken by the will of The Dark Man.
“Well then, wake up.” Omni’s voice said ringing clearly in her ears, a voice only she could hear. A golden light exuded from her very skin, and as it came, it banished the power of The Dark Man from her body.

“NOOOOOO!” The dark man yelled in anger and frustration.

[Valanthe]

Valanthe backed off in horror from The Dark Man. She noticed he seemed to be changing since Omni protected her mind, stirring her from Dark Man's control. Little flecks of white were crossing his body, giving him some slight definition. He had eyes that seemed unfettered by any boundry she could concieve of, as though he could look right at her, and see everything about her, no matter where she was. His lips were twisted into a sneering contempt of all things around him, as though he considered their very existence beneath him.

Suddenly light flashed.

She was viewing a scene from the past, for Lord and Lady Havergast had just finished drawing the strange symbols on the floor. Lord Havergast produced a bound and gagged young woman from a darkened nook of the cavern. He set her in the center of the drawings. He began to speak, Valanthe was certain he was speaking, but it was as if the world itself was groaning in pain, instead of him speaking, so horrible were the words he spoke. As he repeated his words over and over again, he produced a dagger. This dagger, though perfectly straight, and made of steel, seemed bent to such an angle as to be unusable. A vortex was carved into the tip of the blade. He plunged the blade into the innocent woman's heart, and the blade began to glow. From it rose a black smoke, though it felt to be as a strange energy. Valanthe backed up, terrified at what might happen.

The smoke slidified, and hung in mid-air, like a rip in the very fabric of reality. The light of a single torch guttered out, and died, though the flame itself continued to burn. The rip turned white, illuminating the darkness, and widened into a vortex of white, black streaks of energy being drawn into it, the light returned, as the portal closed. The woman was gone, but a pool of black oily liquid lay accross the floor. It drew itself up, rawing itself together, becoming The Dark Man, as Valanthe now saw him. He looked around him with undusguised contempt.

The rock of the walls around them began to become fuzzy and vaporous, like The Dark Man.
"No, we've made a horrible mistake, what have we done?" Lord Havergast asked, his heart fluttering in terror at the unnatural thing before him.
"I am that which is not. Who summons me with such impunity, I have been before the cosmos themselves, before the gods that made them, before the light from which all things sprang, before even time and space were concived of, when all was shrouded in complete darkness, when all was nothingness. I will not be summoned only to be sent away like some mongrel dog." The Dark Man said. He stared hard at Lord Havergast.

Lord and Lady Havergast darted up the stairs around The Dark Man, and The Dark Man followed, leaving Valanthe alone.

"Perhaps I will find the truth out yet behind my dreams and why I was drawn back here." Valanthe said.

She started up the stairs, trailed very closely by moonbeam.

[Valanthe]

As Valanthe walked up the stairs, she realised she might be removed from time. She wasn't quite certain how she came to this realization, but The Dark Man and the Havergasts seemed to be going through everything again, as though it were all happening for the first time. It was also possible someone, or something wanted her to know the truth of the matter, for surely someone as The Dark Man felt.

I would advise you to leave.

Words, rolling like thunder echoed around her, there was no mistaking that voice, it was Omni.
"Is it true I am the reincarnation of their cousin?" Valanthe asked.
Indeed it is, but if you do not leave now, you will come to repent of your time spent here.
"I can't leave yet then, I have to know the story of what happened." Valanthe said.
As you wish.
With that, Omni's presence was gone, but his protections remained.

Moonbeam whimpered, she wanted to leave, she couldn't believe Valanthe wanted to stay!
"It's okay sister, I understand, leave, run away, I don't expect you to be caught up in a past that isn't yours." Valanthe said.
Moonbeam stayed even closer to Valanthe.
A look in her eyes said it all, she loved her sister too much to lave her here in this haunted place.

Valanthe stopped at the entryway again, she could hear the music box coming again from somewhere in the house.
What was the meaning of the music box behind all this?

Someone was entering the manor. It was her former self, only now she was wearing nearly identical robes to Valanthe. They were infact traveling robes.
"Hello Cousins I've popped over from the estate for a visit." she called out through the house. As it so happened, she married the the rich man that bought her cousins title of nobility, a part of the arangement.
She sensed something a bit off in the air, which considering what Valanthe knew now, was somewhat of a bold understatement.
"Cousins?" she asked, stepping forward a pace to glance down the hall to the right.

"HELP!" Lord Havergast yelled from the distance.
Her old self looked taken by surprise at hearing this. This was mainly because Lord Havergast was infact an accomplished spellcaster of some note and thus a person to be feared, but preferred a quiet life of research and obscurity. If it hadn't been for his almost cliche gambling habit and the costly materials neccessary for his particular brand of research, he could've lived very nicely for his entire life.

Valanthe ran after her former incarnation. Moonbeam followed, but at a noticably slower pace.

[Valanthe]

The ran down the hall, and past several open doors.

"Michelle!" gasped Lord Havergast. He was in what was his library. It was very bloody, books were strewn all about, as though he had caused them to fly everywhere. Lord Havergast himself, appeared to have been literally physically ripped in half at the waistline, which expplained the blood.

Lord Havergast was dying, and Valanthe's former incarnation, Michelle, had gone pale at the sight in the library.
"What happened?" she exclaimed.
"Flee these darkened halls, your very existence depends on it. Find The Glorious Light, only it can set us free." Lord Havergast said.

Something caught Michelle's eyes to the right, down the hall. What she saw made her scream and dash out of the manor to follow Lord Havergast's words, for what she saw was The Dark Man thundering down the hall after the fleeing form of Lady Havergast.

"Summon me like some slave will you? You shall both pay the price beyond the end of Eternity." The Dark Man said, his words echoing throughout the building.

Valanthe turned and followed The Dark Man and Lady Havergast. Valanthe just couldn't get over her resemblance to Lady Havergast. Was The Dark Man telling the truth, was she really her mother?

She ran on down the hall after Lady Havergast, and saw her slain, dead on the same dark alter she had seen in town, It seemed as a great demonic claw, little channels were carved in the side to make the blood flow in a certain pattern, a pattern that mimicked the same disturbing symbols found on the floor in the hidden room.

She heard a music box coming from upstairs, and raced upstairs, she knew she was close to an answer! She raced upstairs to see young master Havergast playing on the floor. The Dark Man was sitting in a chair looking utterly disgusted at the mere sight of a child. the child couldn't have been more than two years of age.

Valanthe looked at the child, and at The Dark Man, and felt revulsion at the sudden thought of what was to come.

The Dark Man looked up as Michelle entered the room with a music box. This one was ghostly and transparent, but exactly the same as the one on a table nearby.

"Our dear cousin has finally returned to bring us relief." The Dark Man said in Lord Havergast's voice. He stood up, assuming Lord Havergast's identity.
"Come cousin, we musn't leave him alone, he's only a child. Give me the box, so that I might bring relief to my departed soul, and that of my wife. Take care of our son, we leave you the manor." The Dark Man said. Michelle was completly fooled, she believed The Dark Man was Lord Havergast, and handed over the music Box.

Lord Havergast set it on the table where the real one was. The Music finally stopped playing.

[Valanthe]

Michelle looked several years older, and somewhat more mature, then from when Valanthe saw her former self in the hall below.
"Yes, we musn't leave him alone, he will join my own children. So much has happened in the year I've been gone, it's worn on my body, my soul like several. We will go home to my children." Michelle said.

The Dark Man seemed, stronger than when he first was released.

Valanthe saw everything, twitch. She didn't quite know how else to describe it, it was as though everything had jumped back from something.
"Go, prepare to leave, we musn't leave the poor boy waiting to see his new family." The Dark Man said. Michelle was still under the guise that he was Lord Havergast, so enthralled was she by his powers.

Michelle left, and valanthe wished she had left with her, for The Dark Man turned to the young boy. He cast a barrier of silence around the room, and proceeded to beat the young boy with his bare hands, each blow bringing excessive pain due to The Dark Man's nature. Valanthe rushed over to try and stop him, and to her horror, she went right through them both. She was only viewing an image of what had happened. As the young boy cried, The Dark Man took out a dagger, and proceeded to nick and cut the boy here, and there, first castrating him, and slicing off his ears, and then turning to the boy's other extremeties.

"I hate children, I despise them more than anything else, symbols of new creation, drawn directly from the soul of my enemy. I will make them all pay dearly for the crime they are all guilty of, existing. This world is unsavable, a deformed a decreped malformed imitation of the real world, twisted by the unchecked diseased imaginations of many. How dare it exist to mock me, to bring me suffering and misery. Just as it has done to me, so shall I to it. I shall spread my darkness accross it's lands, and over it's gods. I shall blight it's lands, stifle it's winds, and make it suffer beyond the end of eternity, for I am The Dark Man, I am the end of all things." The Dark Man said. Valanthe broke down into tears, as she watched the child suffer for what it couldn't help.

The soul of the child escaped what was left of it's body, and The Dark Man grabbed it as well. The soul of the child let out a heart wrenching scream, and golden light emerged from outside the window.

"Enough." Omni said, his voice rolling like thunder. He took the spirit into his light, removing it from his grasp. The light seemed to harm The Dark Man, and he collapsed in agony. Slowly he got up, powering through the pain he suffered.

"I don't fear you. It was written in the very beginning that everything, and everyone without exception would eventually meet their end. You cannot escape this fact, someday, you will end, and I will end you. Without your light, all things will be covered in neverending darkness. Now begone." The Dark Man ordered the Omni. With a wave of his hand, Darkness obscured the light once more, and spread out from his body, burning like fire, devouring the house. Valanthe grabbed the music box, the real one, and ran, fleeing down the stairs. She realised Moonbeam had gone missing.

Moonbeam had faithfully been following her sister along, when these five strange men in black robes surrounded her. She bristled and snarled, preparing to leap to attack, but something heavy hit her over the head, and she fell into a deep blackness, knoowing naught of what was going on.
When she awoke, The Dark Man had ahold of her, and his mere touch brought so much pain into her body, that she was unable to do anything but go limp in his arms.

Valanthe ran down the first floor hall, and found Michelle going down into the hidden chamber.
Memories surfaced, she remembered speaking to men that were naturally composed of nothing but light. The told her not to tell even her cousins about the banishing, and they gave her a special candle, made of a special wax. It was wax that was derived from The Dark Man's own flesh and blood, and once lit, would drive him from this world forever.

Michelle placed the candle in the middle of the floor, and lit it with a torch in her hand.
Valanthe saw the entire house waver and disappear., all the spirits, all of it burned in the golden white fire from the candle. Valanthe found herself standing in a small clearing.

"MOONBEAM!" she cried, seeing her sister in The Dark Man's arms. The only remains of the manor, were chunks of large stone, and it was upon one of these that The Dark Man stood, even as The Brotherhood of Darkness stood amongst the trees. Together their power was so great, niether the flora nor the fauna dared to attack.

"And now you know the histoy of why your here. In that box is one of my enemy's greatest soldiers. If you give me the box, and the key I know you have in your pocket, the very same key that unlocks the box, I shall give you your sister back." The Dark Man said.

But the pain Moonbeam had been put through was so great, that it brought her to the edge of death.

"No." Valanthe whispered, not in defiance, but in disbelief that someone, something so horrible existed.

"Deny me, then suffer." The Dark Man said.
His Darkness spread over Moonbeam, consuming her, devouring her very being. within the space of a second that felt as an eternity to Valanthe, Moonbeam ceased to exist, annihilated beyond recovery by The Dark Man.

"NOOO!!!!" Valanthe cried, and she fell to the ground.

"There is no longer any such thing as Moonbeam, and shortly, not even your memories of her will remain, she will completly cease to exist, and all traces of her will be gone, it will be as if she never was. Thus is the penalty you pay for denying me my enemy." The Dark Man said.

"You want your enemy scumbag? Then have him." Valanthe said with grim determination. She grabbed the key, and opened the music box, it shattered, as a shaft of Golden White light shot into the sky, and shattered the darkness.

[Valanthe]

Valanthe stood, and the shaft of light that had shot into the sky returned and shot into her.
"Daughter, be my champion, drive back The Consuming Darkness! Have my strength, have my might, be more than you are, be what you will become." Omni's voice resounded in her ears.

Suddenly she could see herself, and she couldn't even recognise herself. Muscles rippled along her body, those of an experienced adventurer who had seen many fights in her lifetime. The powers of the elements, the might of nature shown in her eyes, and in her hands dwelt an indestructible light that clearly outlined her body. She found she knew things she didn't know only moments before. She smiled. He was going to suffer for unmaking Moonbeam, for the crimes committed against this house, her house.

"Heh, so my two enemies are one. Fine, It'll make your suffering that much more pleasureable to administer." The Dark Man said.

He raised his right hand, and the light faded away and died, all except for Valanthe's light, for it could not be destroyed. The sun still shone, and fires still burned, stars still twinkled in the sky, but not a one emitted any light. Heat they emitted well enough, as much as they normally did, but only darkness remained present. The Dark Man's power was not only destruction and uncreation, but also to alter and destory reality, and that he did, causing the surrounding landscape to again become Havergast Manor.

"Fitting then, that in this new life you should die in your old." The Dark Man said, and caused to appear in his hands, a sword that was longer than a longsword, but not as long as a great sword. It was just as dark as the rest of him, again, with the little flecks of white running accross it continuously.

He charged Valanthe, who had not remained idle. Using Omni's powers she had changed her hands into poisonous claws, and increased her speed. She also used her temporary knowledge boost to give herself the expert knowledge of how to fight with them.

Ducking Dark Man's first swing she stepped around behind him and raked him accross the back. Dark Man turned, swinging his sword, and as he swung, a line appeared in the walls, directly marking the path of his swing so great was it's force. It hit Valanthe, and the light acted as a shield, halving the damage. It knocked her back making her fall on the floor, and caused internal bleeding. Valanthe knew she was hurt inside, and realised the light had given her weak regeneration, enough so that her wounds would be closed soon enough, provided they weren't major.

Dark Man came over to stab Valanthe, and she kicked with her legs making him fall over on his back. He snapped his fingers as he banished his sword, and they both went into free fall down a bottomless pit with no length or width to it's walls, making it seem as though the world itself had disappeared, and for all Valanthe knew, it had.

She made wings sprout out her back, Dragon wings, and a fine set they were too, made of greenish purple scales. She rocketed down towards Dark Man, and gathered the light into her palms, and shot it at Dark Man in a Column. It connected, and seemed to sicken the dark man greatly, allowing Valanthe to wrench control of the darkness from The Dark Man. She made the normal ground appear some ways beneath her, and slowed her descent with her wings. The Dark Man impacted, and caused a small crater to appear, he layed inside it sensless. She turned her attention to The Brotherhood of darkness. She raised her arms to the sky, and an equally sized army of wild creatures came into being and beset The Brotherhood of Darkness. Strange creatures where they, seemingly composed of multiple species at once. Here in one place Valanthe saw what might have been the combination of an Octopus, a Dragon, and a demon all at once, and there, she saw what she thought was a snake a dog, and an Eagle. The others were even weirder, but bore no possible definition she could think of. She might of been horrified if she wasn't protected by Omni's light.

She got hit in the back by a heavy boot making her fall forward, Dark Man had gotten up!
She turned into a werewolf, and got on all fours. She launched herself at The Dark Man, and grabbed him. Though pain shot through her body by touching him, she ripped at his body, and succeeded in tearing what she thought was his flesh. As it seperated, it vaporised into energy. As her claws raked his body, dark mist rose from his wounds. Soon, there was nothing left of Dark Man.

The Brotherhood, which had been fighting valiently, became hazy and transparent as Dark Man vanished, and they too disappeared, back to wherever they came from.

The light returned, the darkness had been vanquished, for now, but she realised she had defeated it wrong, that it hadn't been destroyed, it had only escaped.

She saw her body laying in the middle of the clearing. She realised her spirit had become seperated from her body, and she felt sad, for she knew then that she was dead. She reached down and touched her head, and to her shock, was sucked into her body.

Valanthe sat up, and looked around her. A ball of light was disapating. She felt normal, not impowered by anything. Was the fight a dream?

"What, What really happened?" Valanthe asked.

"Would you like to know?" Omni asked.

"Yes." Valanthe said.

[Valanthe]

Instead of speaking directly, Valanthe found herself watching, as though a spirit watching through time. She saw her former cousin, Lord Havergast, watched his life, spent with days of fruitful research, and nights of fruitless gambling. Eventually, the man landed himself in a debt not even selling his research to the Alerarians could pull him out of. A wealthy knight offered to pay of his debts, in exchange for his nobility, his lands, and his cousin whom the knight had fallen in love with. Desperate to relieve his debt, he agreed. Then the knight revealed himself to be the man he owed the debt to in the first place.

Barely escaping with some few possesions, Lord and Lady Havergast escaped into the forests of endless red. Building for themselves a new manor home, revenge stirred in Lord Havergasts soul, for he felt he had been cheated, and in a manner, he had, but it was he who had cheated himself by giving in to gambling. He sold more research, and managed to acquire a small fortune, which he immediatly spent on researching the dark powers.

Lord Havergast contacted and made deals with shady individuals, and even darker powers seeking revenge. Eventually, he heard of a secret nameless city that stood in the sands of Fallien. Alas, he was too ill to go, so Lady Havergast went instead.
The things that transpired there were not shown to Valanthe, instead, she watched as months rolled by and Michelle, her former incarnation came by and visitied, first alone, then pregnant with a child, and then with twins at her side. Eventually, Lady Havergast returned. She was different, as though something irreplaceable had been taken from her, or perhaps it had been given. Clearly, she had peeked behind the curtain and seen things no living being should.

She spoke of a great and towering city, filled with endless avenues lined with horrible abominations, ran by a cult of monks calling themselves The Brotherhood of Darkness, all worshipping a great and powerful entity called The Consuming Darkness, known more commonly as The Dark Man.

Lord Havergast was intrested. Lady Havergast smiled as she produced a scroll with the summoning rites to bring The Dark Man to them.

She was brought back to the present moment.
"But there is something you should understand, The Dark Man was not yet in this reality. The Brotherhood had not the power, only the spells to summon him to this world. Now he is growing, becoming more powerful, like a lethal virus in the bloodstream, waiting to unleash it's might upon an unwitting host, and it is entirely the fault of Lord and Lady Havergast. Children should not be allowed to play with things they do not understand." Omni said.

Valanthe was watching again. Time had passed, Lord Havergast had read and thoroughly researched the scroll, which was why he had dug out and built, the secret room beneath the manor. There, he laid down designs of pure gold, and had forged, a sacrificial knife of special design. Then he lured in a homeless but still relativly innocent woman, with promises of free room and board if she kept his house clean.

Lord Havergast snuck up on her one night, bound and gagged her, and took her to the basement where she was used in the sacrificial rites that summoned The Dark Man.
Valanthe discovered she was looking at the entire world. Before The Dark Man had been summoned, it looked beautiful, peaceful, but now the child of The Thayne looked sick, not that mortals would discover this sickness for some time. But when the crops in the field began to rot where they stood, the oceans began to disappear, the fires began to grow cold, and the air began to still, then they would understand, when the sun set for the last time, enshrouding the world in never ending darkness, then at last they would understand. But perhaps they would discover before then.

Valanthe watched again, as Lord Havergast was slaughtered, but now she saw something new and surprising, Lady Havergast learned new secrets in The Nameless City, she cloned her spirit, and was now fleeing through the woods from The Dark Man, which was how Valanthe was able to come to be.

Michelle was fleeing through the woods, and now Valanthe's vision was following her, and to Valanthe's great surprise, she went to the island of Scare Brae, and followed the exact same route avoer the island she did. There she spoke in terror of the events that had transpired, causing fear and consternation to spread accross the otherwise blissful and happy faces there.

She was made to undergo a series of trials, tests of her spirit, and strength, and at last, satisfied her spirit was worthy to carry one of Omni's great warriors they gave her a small music box to carry. This Music Box they said, was the easiest way to get the warrior there, for who would think to look inside a Lady's Music box for a mighty power?
Valanthe could see inside the box, it had been the plan all along to empower the one who opened the box to defeat The Dark Man, unless he himself had opened it, at which point it would explode in his face.

Michelle returned to The Havergast Manor with the box in hand, but she was not Omni's follower, and thus not protected from Dark Man's powers. Dark Man, sensing Omni's power in the box, subdued her into thinking he was Lord Havergast, haunting the manor to look after his son. Michelle gave him the box, only to be sent off. The monks had told her that The Dark Man might trick her into giving him the box, and if he did, don't resist, just go to the spot he was summoned at, and place a candle they gave her on the spot. Omni's power would shine in the candle, and seal The Dark Man's powers, thus banishing him back to the place that was no place, from which he had come.

The Dark Man caught her, just in time to prevent himself from being permanently banished. He was unable to touch the candle, but was sucked out of reality, and back to where he came.
Michelle collapsed on the ground, in triumph. However a great black circle opened out of her sight, and this circle absorbed all things around it. But it was open only briefly, as The Dark Man re-entered this world.
"The Omnisource doesn't understand the powers of Nothingness, only I do." The Dark Man snarled. Michelle started in terror, she thought she had won, but before she could rise and flee, The Dark Man caught her, and devoured her, body and soul, like he had Moonbeam. Then he disappeared, and Valanthe's vision went with him.

"But, I don't understand, if he devoured my soul, how am I here?" Valanthe asked.
"That is another story, for another time, for there is more involved in it's telling. Particularly of how your Father came to be with your Mother, for he too has been to The Nameless City." Omni said.

Valanthe stood, and brushed herself off. The Music Box still sat there on the ground, now just a common music box, with drawers for jewelery. It was a very pretty music box, lined with velvet, trimmed with gold, made of red wood. She picked it up, and pocketed it.

"Then I shall go to this nameless city in the sands of Fallien." Valanthe declared.
She walked off, mind filled with unanswered questions about her past.
But one question was at the top of her mind, why did she get angry in the first place? Sure Dark Man showed her the past, when he killed what once was her cousin's son, but still, she wasn't that angry, more disturbed. She remembered something about a wolf, but brushed it out of her mind as inconsequntial. For the truth was, Dark Man's words were true and absolute. Moonbeam had completly ceased to exist, not even the memory of her remained.


And thus this is finished. I request only the sole surviving artifact from Havergast Manor, the Music box Valanthe took. It is common, with no special properties of any kind what so ever. It is lined with red velvet, made of the same common Red wood, lined with gold at the edges, and has a mirror. When opened it plays a hauntingly sad melody. It has room for six small pairs earrings.

[AdventWings]

...Before I say anything... I have to congratulate you on a job well done.

This is, by far, the best I've seen of your writing. Really brings tears to my eyes...

*Sniff*

...Well, without much further ado, let's take a look at the Judgment.

Story

Continuity - 7

While not immediately stated as to how this relates to your character's overall story, the events which unfolded showed exactly why this story is important. If anything, this story was about Valanthe and who she was.

Setting - 8

Detailed where need be and vague when necessary. Nothing much to add here.

Pacing - 9

One word: Excellent. Well, OK. Almost excellent. It was a little fleeting, especially during the later parts of the story, but it really did give the readers the feeling of urgency. Some details were truncated, thus sacrificing some story, but otherwise the story-telling pace was very effectively used.

Writing Style

Mechanics - 6

Watch out for Capitalizations and comma usage, which you still have a tendency to miscapitalize words with disregard to their position in the sentence. Sentence structure is something that could use some more work on, although it should not be a big problem anymore.

Technique - 7

You really know where to put your literary techniques to make them stand out well. I would love to see you add more Onomatopoiea into the mix, although that is up to you as a writer.

Clarity - 7

Some sentence structure problems led to confusing passages, but for the most part you took advantage of writing "vague" passages to create a sense of uncertainty when you narrated the "Vision" sequence. The amalgam between the meta-reality Valanthe was experiencing during her past life and what Moonbeam saw was very well-played in this instance.

Character

Dialogue - 6

The Dark Man's speech when he had his hands on little boy was rather... Awkward. His monologue did not complement his current actions (as physical labor would reasonably impede capacity for speech - but the Dark Man spoke as if he was standing at a podium) but the rest of them reflected his mindset well. If that particular passage was reworked, he would seem a genuinely likable villain to hate. Valanthe's initial reaction to the Brotherhood of Darkness (Post # 3) left me wondering why would she say something like that. It might be more appropriate for Valanthe to say "T- The Brotherhood of Darkness!" and be done with it. Her physical reaction could then be narrated to show fear instead.

Action - 8

Nothing much to say, but I feel each of the characters seemed more alive than the last time I've read your works.

Persona - 7

Valanthe's own emotional rollercoaster seemed to be downplayed to facilitate the story's flow. It's such a sad sacrifice, but a necessary one. Unless you wanted to write more details into her reactions, which might begin to feel bland over a long stretch of time.

One note I would like you to look at is Valanthe's reaction when Moonbeam was "unmade" by the Dark Man. I believe her emotional state and psyche could be better explored than simply skipped over, although that would most likely add another paragraph or two to your post.

Miscellaneous

Wild Card - 10

<3 this story. It almost feels like I'm playing a Survival Horror game from the Fatal Frame series. Put it in your Sig! :D

FINAL SCORE – 75!

((Rewards + Spoils))

Valanthe receives 1250 EXP and 200 GP.

She loses Moonbeam (No~! Why~?!) but receives the Music Box (remember to capitalize this!) with all its accessories. Although it is definitely an important quest item, I ask you not to sell this in the Bazaar. I will catch you if you do. ;)

[Witchblade]

EXP and GP added!

Valanthe reaches level 1!