Bird's Eye View

[Vandeski]

The bird humaniod stood at his full of 8' 9" as he breathed in the crisp early morning air. His bare taloned feet feet digging small tranches into the dirt road with his massive foot claws. His arms out wide as if he expect at any moment that some one would come and complete his embrace. His greatsword strapped around his back. While still in this pose, jnown to his people at mountain, the bird man let out a bone curdleing call from his sharp brown and yellow, hawked beak.

Vandeski could feel the power that eminating from the Citadel and the surrounding area. Many wispered of this ombiguous place had reached him and his mother in there mountain for many years, and he had always wanted to treck down the mountain path and test his metal against an opposing person, a being of actuall intellagence instead the stupid and barbaric cratures of the mountains.

Now that Vandeski was on his own, he felt the need to test himself before he undertook his questfull search of his father. And so Vandeski ,or Van as he liked to be called, strode through the Citadel's massive doors with long powerfull strides. When he openned the doors, his massive, muscle corded arms bulging slightly from the slight exertion, all eyes immidiatly came his way, but they werent the looks that he normally got from the lesser races. The ones of awe, wounder, curiosity, but most prevalent fear. None of these came at him, just.........understanding. The monks knew diffrences were not to be feared and Vandeski showed his appreciation for such with a nod of his massive faethered head.

"Do you have a particuler desire for an arena?" asked a particularly plump monk with his wide brimmed hood up.

"Just one good for a melee battle, if you do not mind" came Vandeski's booming response. With out a word the monk turned and left with Vaneski's surprisingly light foot steps following close behind. The monk lead him down what seamed like to Van a random series of hallways and corradors, into a section of the Citadel were many tapestries and ornate weapons lined the walls. Finnally after what seamed like an hour to Van the monk stopped in front of a brown ceder door. The monk openned the door the and gestured for Van to walk through the portal witch he quickly obliged.

When he exited out the other side of the portal Van found himself in a savannah like terrian, a type of terrian he was very unacustume too. There was a single tree right behind were Van stood on top of a slight hill. The plain seamed to go on forever in all directions with little diffrence in the scenery. Vandeski pulled his Greatsword Nameless from his back an brought the massive four foot blade before him. He sword at the blade mentally preparing himself for the battle to come. He then sat cross-legged his back against the trunk and Nameless accross his lap and then clossed his eyes.

Nameless my friend......now we wait.

[Taskmienster]

Colin punched the screen with the dangerous intent that filled his eyes, lips pursed and eyebrows furrowed deeply. His girlfriend had been nagging him all day, all night, and into the next day. If there was one thing he wanted it was a beer, but since drinking at work was not an option he took the next best step and wandered into the nearest virtual reality pod. On his coattails were a number of people, coworkers at the GramVR, which had never ending questions he did not want to deal with. “Colin,” the voice was the distinctive one that the vice president of the company alone could command. Reluctantly the chief programmer shook his head and put on a placid face, if only to appease the single man in the company’s building that was ahead of him on the corporate ladder. “We need to chat my friend.”

The programmer sat up and looked at the elderly man, eye to eye. Mr. Heartcliff the third took a step away from the piercing gaze of his prized employee, and placed a frail hand on the younger man’s shoulder. Colin wanted to push it off, get into Althanas, and play around with the coding. “Seems that you’re making leaps and bounds with the new tech that we’ve provided you, but you have yet to bring in a report or write down any glitches that are occurring. We cannot have the technology department fix issues if they do not know what issues may plague the headset.”

The chief programmer turned corporate hacker shrugged, efficiently removing the hand from his shoulder. “Sir,” he said with a sigh, “If I may be blunt. The issues that are in the headset came from the incompetence of the tech department to begin with. I know how to code, I know what it needs, and can fix it myself. If I find something that I, or Brittany, can’t recode or fix at home then, and only then, would I bother bringing the problems to the as of now unimpressive group of ‘technical wizards’ you continue to pay. They know how to work with GramVR’s technology; they are good with the simplistic educational programs that the company was founded on. Gaming technology, the codes and reality that Althanas and TechFront created, they can’t do shit with it.”

The man’s mouth dropped when the younger programmer cursed, but he closed his mouth just as quickly when Colin laid back in the pod and began logging in. The pod door shut and left the virtual reality hacker to his solace and peace. But his agenda for the day was not one founded on peace, he was not going to work, he was going to play. The most influential of monuments in Althanas was his target, The Citadel was awaiting him.


~*~

The character played by Colin, Ethan “Lars” Calhoun, walked out of a small alley and looked both ways. The pod was much more reliable than the headset that he had at home. The chances for a glitch that sent him to a part of the world of Althanas other than where he wanted were completely reduced. As such, the bustling city of Radasanth was laid out before him. The city was just as impressive as the first time he had entered it, and it was as active as an agitated ant hill. He pushed through the crowd and up the stairs into the hallowed halls of the Citadel. The building was a temple to the warrior, a bastion built on the foundations of war and used for the training and advancement of all who fought.

“I don’t care who I fight, I don’t care where it is; I just need to blow some fuckin’ steam.” Lars mumbled to the first hooded monk that approached him. The man nodded without a word and started off down the halls with the Althanas hacker on his coattails just as his coworkers had been before he had retreated to the VRpod. “Thanks,” he said as he pushed past the man and into the room.

((Apologies for the delay, between Halloween, breaking up with my gf, and fighting someone at one of the parties I was at I’ve lost a lot of time. Should be faster now. Feel free to have Ethan enter as you see fit.))

[Vandeski]

Van didnt have to open his eyes to know that some one had entered his sactuary of calm, he felt the disterbance in the air as the door apeared a few feet to his left and a man come through. He could feel an aura of some form of stress around the man, as if he was agry or distressed. This did not bode well with Van, An emotional or distracted oppponent was always more dangerous and unpredicatable then a clear cut focused opponent.

With a sigh Van stodd at his full hight, bring Nameless up with him.

"My Name is Vandeski Ironwing, you may call me Van. May i ask your name?"

The greating was simple and couteous, just what Van needed to calm the curious looking man.

[Taskmienster]

“That boy is going to be the end of us all.” The elderly George Heartcliff thought as he patted the side of the pod Colin had just entered. The employees that had been asking questions before he had arrived were looking at him dumbfounded. Open agitated disrespect from anyone was unheard of, seeing someone of lower rank in the company talk down to the vice president was unbelievable. He shooed his hands at them. The people nervously lowered their heads and moved away, taking quick strides to return to their cubicle and gossip with the others. Heartcliff was not an idiot; he knew the talk would quickly spread. To be seen as cowardly in the face of the company, to be demeaned by Colin was something that would not be tolerated.

The man shuffled away to his office, cane in hand. After dropping in his plush leather seat he removed a bottle of whiskey from his cherry oak desk. A flick of his hand and the room was concealed from the world outside, a one way mirror effect masking the windowed wall. “Colin,” he muttered as he lit a cigar and poured a glass. “What’s in the works for you? What are we going to do with you? You are already becoming far too much to handle…”


~*~

Lars appeared quickly in a flash of white light, his body was pieced together nearly instantly. The process was a code that the player behind Ethan had yet to explain. It was a code so confusing and delicate he could hardly decode it and read it. The more he entered the world of Althanas, or the battlegrounds in the Citadel, the more he came in contact with the code that was a form of ‘transportation’. “Damned code,” He thought as stepped forward into the new arena. “It’s like an itch in the center of my back, can’t fuckin’ scratch it because I can’t fucking reach it… what do we have here?”

The land was bland, an unenthusiastic creation of the simplistic. In every direction the plains were peaceful and empty. It was a savanna creation, high drying grass drifting in the free flowing winds, but it was oddly devoid of animal life. Lars shook his head, even a rhino in the distance would have been something for the pure aesthetic quality of making it more realistic. Instead, the hacker was given the undeniable view of his opponent. “Suppose he’ll have to do for wildlife,” he jokingly chided to no one in particular.

The beast had risen from his seated position as soon as Ethan had entered the area, bringing with him a sword that was bigger than a longsword but not quite long enough to be a claymore. The impressive weapon was downplayed by the massive creature that wielded it… some mix of human and bird. Lars had already fought one bird-like creature in the Citadel, a fight that had brought him to the edge of his sanity and broken his resolve. Engaging in combat once again against a bird-like opponent was not something that he looked forward too.

“Names are trivial,” he responded and took a small step forward. From either sleeve two silent throwing daggers fell to his naked, waiting palms. The rounded steel ends fit comfortably in his cupped hands, and their silent arrival was almost impossible to perceive. “Quite honestly I’m not gonna remember yours in a week from now, and telling you mine isn’t going to do you any good. How about we just ignore the stupid intros and do what we both came to get done?”

Without waiting for a response the hacker jerked his right arm straight, sending one of the three inch blades it held directly for his opponent’s body. The man was on a slight incline, having found the only small dais in the flatlands, which held the only tree in sight. Lars wanted to draw him away from the tree, down to him, and into close combat where the four foot blade would be less useful.

[Vandeski]

"Names are trivial" said the man. Hmph, names are trivial? It would be a member of the lower race that would say such a thing. Thought Van, his anger riseing quickly with the obvious lack of respect this man had for others, and then to insult him by hinting that was not even worthy of this man's rememberance!

In the world's list of creatures not to insult, Adar hold third place, right behind Demons and Dragons. How dare he!

And then the small man did what all Adar deamed to be the most vile and dirty thing you could do..........he attacked without a proper start of battle. To Adar honor and respect are the highest of all achievments, and when a battle of one on one is in play honor must be upheld. To attack with out a proper etiquette was unforgivable, and the giulty of this most henious of crimes would be instantly shunned along with their entire family if they had been a member of the an Adarian society.

So angery was Van that he almost forgot to actually do something about the dagger flying towards him. With the finesse that should have only been used by a young wood elf, Van pulled a throwing dagger out of his belt and sent it flying. The two blades connected a second later, creating a small spark, sending the man's dagger in a random direction while Van's 8 in dagger, the larger of the two, kept going forward but was deflected enough too miss the man by several feet.

Van glared at his opponent, "You have dishonored yourself and your family, i shall now have the prevalige of killing you" said Van with a deathly calm in his vioce. Van stood there waiting to see his opponents next move. He thought about sending one of his own daggers flying at him, but Van only had 3 throwing daggers left and wanted to save them to block any more oncoming missiles hte man may send his way. So he waited......

[Taskmienster]

The massive creature was quick, far too fast for something its size. The feather covered foe had removed a dagger from his belt, lifted his arm, and launched the projectile in defense. The two blades clashed and sparked. As soon as the contact was made they separated and parted ways, out of the area and too far to retrieve for further use. “Faster than me? More accurate than me? This is ridiculous, are all bird creatures on par with gods?” Lars muttered to himself as he let another dagger find his empty palm and slowly advanced. His plan of leading away his opponent seemed to be a strategy that would quickly have to be rethought.

Van was either angry or emotionless; his still voice was without the irate tone that the hacker would have expected from any other man. Despite the threat of death the hacker stopped his slow advance and laughed, as if the man had told some grand joke. “If only you knew where I came from, you’d see why I don’t give a shit about honor. You speak too much, and I’m tired of hearing you talk… don’t bother responding.” Lars sighed. There were far too many people that wanted to walk into the Citadel and chat with their opponent, respond and argue, and that was not what the place was for.

Lars moved as fast as he could, faster than the common man. Both hands shot forward through the twenty foot distance between himself and Van. As soon as the blades were released the hacker smashed his hands together and sent a wave of auditory energy at his opponent. Disrupting the code of sound, using it offensively was easy. It also presented an interesting advantage. The clap would meet his opponent just before the daggers closed. The nature of the intense vibrations could easily throw off anyone’s equilibrium and in turn their ability to balance and see straight.

“Try blocking these so perfectly when you can barely stand up straight!” Ethan thought with a smirk, hoping that his plan would work.

[Vandeski]

Van watch as the man ran forward and launched two more daggers his way, and then for some reason clapped right afterwards. Thinking nothing of it, Van just as quickly as last time pulled another dagger from his belt and sent it flying to the blade comeing at his right, he planned on doing the exact same thing with the one coming to his left but Van was suddenly assaulted by a wave of energy and sound when the second dager was a mere three feet from him. Magic!?. All Adar distrusted magic and even more so the wielders of such power. It was a deeply imbedded hate that went back many ages ago when the Adar fought the Council of Zelthuse.

Van felt his center of balance shatter within him. With no real option left, other then let the dagger hit him, Van did the only things he could think of....he fell. With out even trying to slow his fall with his arms, Van jumped back, his arms comeing in to protect his vitals just in case the manuver was not not quite enough to dodge the oncoming missile.

As Van jumped off the hillcock, he felt a fire like pain as the thrown dagger cut a four in. long gash along his left shoulder. Van then hit the ground hard, the sudden stop so violent that Nameless fell free from his hand. NO! Disoriented, Van knew that he must get off the ground, his opponent was probaly already almost down the hill readying the killing blow.

With a great force of will, van stood up forceing away the diziness that was clouding his mind. He quickly spotted Nameless about fifteen feet away from him also at the bottom of the hill. Nameless! Van pulled his third dagger from his belt and let it fly towards his oppenent, not even bothering to watch its path as he ran full out for Nameless hopeing he could get to the blade in time........

[Taskmienster]

The fleet of foot birdman was quick not only in reactions but taking actions too, surprisingly light on his feet for such a massive beast. His sudden jerk away from the weapons as soon as the wave of sound crashed into him was unexpected. Lars did not let up on the assault though. Before the sword fell from the massive grip of Van and the dagger he expelled in relation was loosed, the merciless hacker was moving. His tight lipped visage was a picture of determination, and like a wild animal smelling the weakness and fresh blood he was prepared for the kill.

With the dizziness destroying his center of calm, Ethan watched the man stand and begin running for his precious sword. The quick gait he assumed slowed only when he saw the flash of a third dagger streak through the air. It was tossed with desperation behind it, a sour prayer following its path. Like faith in a god, it was misplaced and came with the bitter taste of false hope. Before the dagger struck the hacker, who was rushing headlong at the blade, he ‘cast’ another ‘spell’.

The world halted, leaving the hacker with the still air and frozen picture. The winds that passed over the plains were stilled, the grass that rocked back and forth stood still mid quiver. “Amazing what you notice when the world stops,” Lars thought as he pushed towards the man and his sword, carefully grabbing the dagger sent towards him as he did so. There were only two seconds of timelessness that he had to work with, and a gap that he still had to overcome.

As quickly as he could he ran towards Van’s back, mere feet away before the time lapse had to be released. He let the coding return to normal, watching as the threads of the ‘reality’ of Althanas replaced themselves and faded away. The winds washed over him, so slight but so vibrant after the stillness of the hack he had used. He watched in awe as the coding fell into place, the feathers of his opponent continued their motion, the man continued to move towards his blade, and Lars threw the blade once used against him. If he could keep the sword from use he could easily win.

((You can decide if it hits or not, just thrown at your back.))

[Vandeski]

Van sprinted with all the speed he could muster towards Nameless, like a dog filled with a ravaneous after a week long of fasting. Through his periphable vision, Van saw the dagger wielding man suddenly fanish right before Van's dagger was going to hit him. A milasecond later the man came back into view, but now much closer then before and Van's very own dagger in his hand! For all of Van's hate for magic and it's users, he could not help but admired this ones use of magic. He did not launch fire balls or attempt to banish Van to a diffrent plane of existance. He merely used his magic to even the playing field, were Van such an abvious advantage of speed and strength.

Van's thoughts quickly returned to the battle at hand when the man launched Van'a very own dagger at him, perfectly leading Van so as to let him run straight into the missiles path. With a twitch of Van's powerfull legs, Van jump horazantally into the air in a spinning motion when he was a mere five feet away from Nameless and the thrown dagger less then a foot away.

Van's feathered han clasped around Namless's hilt just as the dagger tore into his flesh justhi armpit. It was a superficial wound but one that none the less, given the right amount of time, would affect him. Van exited his dive into a roll that lept straight back to his feet faceing his opponent with nameless in both hands. A smooth calm come over Van as he feel deep wihin himself relying on instincts alone, leaving his mind completly out of the picture as he heart dictated his moves at speed the mind could possobly registure fast enough.

Van launched himself into a forward thrust, useing Namless's massive blade to provide some distance between the two combatents. He then launched into a serious quic repatative strikes, never come from the same angle more the once so as to keep the smaller man on his toes. Van was much stronger then the man and likely could fight for many hours while this humans weaker muscles would beg for a hault. So Van kept up his act, moveing his sword into a slashing motion of great powerfull swips and cureves through air, waiting for the sign of weariness to show in his opponent.

[Taskmienster]

When the dagger dug into the man’s arm the sick smirk on the face of the hacker grew. He had scored a wicked blow to the man who thought his honor would save him. Any ordinary creature would have been dying or in mortal peril, a blade through the underarm would be a death blow. It was the base for the major nerves and veins that ran the full length of the arm. Van was something different; his anatomy was unlike anything belonging to a normal human. The notion scared the determined hacker, but he did not let it show. Adrenaline pumping he went to work.

The time he had was slipping away though, and with it so was Lars’ patience. The man before him had taken a grievous blow, and yet fought on. He had reached his sword, and in turn had turned on the hacker with a vengeance. The heavy blade furiously tore through the air. Ethan was not going to let it hit him if he could avoid it. The man obviously thought he had the upper hand, with his outright greater size and ability to dance his way out of trouble, but Lars was far from helpless.

As a hacker he had learned to manipulate the reality of Althanas, not only in ways to simulate spells but too in ways to augment his own physical body. The man may have been strong, but Lars had a boost in strength. Van may have been fast, but so was the hacker. To make matters worse for the cocky bird, his opponent was also able to fight on despite conditions most like him would not be able to bear.

He watched and dodged as best he could, barely pushing himself back up the hill and towards the tree, trying to keep the heavy blade from finding a true target. He finally felt his back against the tree and waited for another swipe, planning on letting the sweeping arching blade catch the trunk and take full advantage of the weapon getting stuck. “Or at the very least,” Lars hoped, ”I can get a dagger in with only one way to attack from…”

[Taskmienster]

The heavy sword of the bird-like creature was wildly swung, haphazardly forced towards the hacker seemingly without intelligent thought behind it. The man’s strength was impressive, though directed towards his opponent in the wrong way. As a swordsman, he had skill with where the sword was directed and the overall ability of using the weapon. However, every swing looked like a homerun hitter wielding a baseball bat against a fleeing ball. Ethan shook his head as the bladed edge passed, sometimes turning to the flattened edge with a backhanded attack. If the man had a mace or even a simple club his feathered body would not have appeared so elegantly, but his fighting style would have greatly approved.

“You fight like a barbarian,” the hacker said with a smile. “It’s blunt and rude. There are no supremely beautiful strokes… despite your best effort you have become a caged animal lashing out.” The man’s grimace drew longer as he leapt through the largest gap Ethan had created since the outburst. His body took over the setting, a wall of feathers to conceal the sun-soaked grasslands behind him. If Lars had not already had a plan he would have faltered in the man’s shadow.

The sword fell, and Lars took his chance. He jumped sideways as firmly as he could, the edge of his opponent’s weapon following his course. Instead of using extra senses, he hoped that his speed and strength would save him. In the end, it did. The sword slammed into the tree with a thud that made the hacker smile. His hand shot out, wrapped around a trunk, and spun him around.

Mid-air, he extended his feet and planted them in the monsters face. Honor would be no help in a battle of unequal opponents. The feathered warrior nearly flew backwards, his hands letting loose the handle on his sword as he did so. Blood fell from his arm and lips, his eyes shot towards his foe that waited mere feet from him. The scared, furious eyes were screaming what no words could match.

“And this is the end.” The two daggers that flew from the hacker were thrown full force, point blank, with a bloodied and broken opponent unable to move away. One blade tore through the creature’s throat, piercing the edge of his neck when he attempted to turn away from the oncoming missile. The second dagger found its mark. The tip of the smooth steel dagger tore into the chest, just off center of the sternum, puncturing a lung. Blood gurgled in his lungs, the airways deflated, while more blood gushed from his mouth.

Lars turned from the man. Once the body was recovered by the monks, his daggers would be pulled from their targets and returned. There was nothing left to be had of the battle.

[Veatrix]

A Bird's Eye View by Vandeski and Taskmienster (http://www.althanas.com/world/showthread.php?t=17474)

A short judgement with a bit of commentary as per request by Task. Sorry for the delay, yo.
Want to complain, bitch or tell me I’m amazing? PM me or catch me on AIM. Whenever I’m on.
Let’s go.

Taskmienster

STORY (19/30)
Continuity (7/10)
Setting (5/10)
Pacing (7/10)

CHARACTER (20/30)
Dialogue (6/10)
Action (7/10)
Persona (7/10)

WRITING STYLE (21/30)
Mechanics (8/10)
Technique (6/10)
Clarity (7/10)

Wild Card (8/10)

68/100

For the most part, Task followed what every other battle would be – quick, concise and to the point. The action and dialogue was suitable for what was there, and the character was portrayed enough to be… not convincing, but fitting, at the least. Not many spelling errors, but a few missing words here and there. Otherwise, good job, although I did dock a few marks for the obvious powergaming at the last post ALTHOUGH it wouldn’t have happened under different circumstances.

Vandeski

STORY (16/30)
Continuity (5/10)
Setting (4/10)
Pacing (7/10)

CHARACTER (18/30)
Dialogue (5/10)
Action (7/10)
Persona(6/10)

WRITING STYLE (12/30)
Mechanics (2/10)
Technique (4/10)
Clarity (6/10)

Wild Card (4/10)

44/100

Welcome to the site! And with that, it’s just a tad obvious Vandeski is new at this. Which is completely not a bad thing – we all started there. Nevertheless, I cannot stress spell checking and editing enough. So much of the posts were affected by misplaced words or letters. As well, make the character more believable and not leaning to the ‘I am an honourable warrior’ cliché. Maybe a flaw or a lingering thought? Lastly, explain the names dropped – I do not know who Adar or the Council of Zelthuse is. Sad that you abandoned this, though.

Taskmienster is the winner!

Taskmienster gains 1478 EXP and 200 GP!
Vandeski gains 188 EXP and 150 GP!

[Taskmienster]

Exp and GP added!