Bullshit Games: The Poor Man's MMO

[Visla Eraclaire]

Mafia Wars, YoTown, some fucking Cafe Sim, Evony...

I cannot check my damned email without seeing this utter garbage slathered all over the walls of the internet like feces in a monkey house.

How bored are people that they are transfixed by this horseshit? Look, casual gaming is one thing. Fine, mezmerizing pablum for the masses, but I never had to hear about someone's bejweled score, until now. BEJEWELED BLITZ. Every five minutes I get to hear about someone's new quote achievement unquote. Badges and medals that were originally envisioned as prestige awards in real games, the MMO grindathon theory, and social networking sites are all conglomerating to make the most insufferable bloated behemoth since Michael Moore.

I feel like I am the only one of my friends, some of whom are even decent human beings, who isn't in love with these worthless sacks of crap. I am the eye of the Goddamned storm. (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2004/9/10/)

[Slavegirl]

You know on Facebook you can click hide and choose to hide notifications from each app - any friend whose score or achievement is posted to their page, those posts will not show. Just FYI.

[Max Dirks]

So that's where you've been hiding, Slavegirl. I missed you.

I also hate those dumb Facebook games. I've blocked them on my privacy page, but every once in awhile (read every day) a new game slips through and I have to block the application again. So much for being trendy.

[Visla Eraclaire]

Yeah, I gave up on blocking them, because they update and change so often that a new one slips through and I'd spend half my day blocking all the new garbage my idiot friends find.

[Sighter Tnailog]

Man, I hate all those games too. But you know, I kind of like them, because they give me an excuse to feel superior to all these other peons whose attempt at enjoying themselves is really merely a laughable expression of their idiocy. What would I do without the contrast they provide? They are such garbage stupidfucks while I am the only enlightened one in a sea of unwashed shitfaces, and those games sure help me clarify my moral position as one of unassailable righteousness.

[Saxon]

Sometimes I'm unsure of when you're being honest or sarcastic. This is one of those moments.

[Sighter Tnailog]

I was being satirical. I don't particularly care for sarcasm.

[Visla Eraclaire]

I was being satirical. I don't particularly care for sarcasm.


excuse to feel superior to all these other peons

This.

[Sighter Tnailog]

Yes?

Edit: Took me a bit, but I see what you did there. Hoisted on my own petard, eh? But I did not mean to suggest that my distaste for sarcasm was due to any fault in the nature of sarcasm, anything which makes sarcasm somehow "less" than satire. Rather, that sarcasms arrayed as sharp, biting remarks -- and even that FORM of satire which is the effective deployment of such remarks -- is just not my preferred style. I make no value judgments on those for whom it is a preferred style.

[Visla Eraclaire]

Your long justification paragraphs are futile.

[Sighter Tnailog]

How well I know it.

[Cyrus the virus]

Yeah them games suck lotsa ballz.

[Mouse]

Awww. I play Mobsters 2. I try to undo any of the updates that go to my page, though. Sometimes I find out that the game slipped it through on me, though. :( Last week I accidentally put 3 Mobsters announcements through on status updates. Oops.

The only other online game I play doesn't e-mail anything to anyone, yay Sharkrunners! :)

[Atzar]

Nick earned a new high score of 370,950 playing the NEW Bejeweled Blitz!
This is Nick's highest score of the week. Nick will earn his next medal at 250k.



That's right. Eat it.