Long Walks On The Beach; Alternatively: Pirates!

[Ulysses]

Closed to Alister! ^^
The Lieutenant looked just like a porpoise. He was dressed in a spotless white uniform with yellow buttons, and was so overweight as to be practically round. Atop his head a barnacle stuck on the hull of a massive ship. As he spoke a slight bit of drool crept over his lip and began to swing back and forth like a metronome. Ulysses watched it, hypnotized.

“So you’re the boy they send to help me? Not even a proper naval boy, just some kid with a sword in off the streets? Tell me, boy, d’you even have any combat experience?”

Ulysses blinked and snapped out of his trance. Did he have any combat experience? Hundreds of years of memory flashed across his eyeballs in a second. “A bit, sir,” he said.

The Lieutenant—his surname was Guffer—leaned back in his plush green chair. It wasn’t the only thing that was plush about the room. Gilded nautical instruments collected dust in a corner. Overhead: a bright green lizard-like hung from the ceiling by strings. Ulysses wondered how the Lieutenant afforded such luxuries on a low-ranking officer’s salary. “Hmph. Well that’s good I guess,” Guffer said. “’Cause you’ll need it. Look, kid, these drakes ain’t nothing to joke about.”

“I know that, sir.” Ulysses said. He did not think that drakes were anything to joke about. He’d accepted the job at the Navy’s headquarters in the city of Scara Brae, and he knew well enough what to expect. Once a year the drakes, who normally stayed in the harbor and harassed ships, crawled up onto Neverscale Beach to lay their eggs. This was the only time when they could be killed and their valuable scales and eggs collected. The scales were useful for making armor and magical potions; the eggs simply made a good omelet and ensured there would be one less drake in the ocean next year. The drakes were a menace to fisherman off the coast, and he’d dealt with them his whole life out on fishing boats; as a child with his father, and later on his own.

Well, in my previous life, anyway, he thought. Before the spirit of valor had chosen him to be its emissary, and stolen his name and home in the name of making a hero. He hadn’t seen a drake since that day. It was almost ironic that he’d be battling them again.

It wasn’t a safe or an easy job. The drakes were small amphibious dragons of anywhere from three to six feet in length, and they had a powerful bite and vicious claws. Their scales made them almost impervious to harm, too. They weren’t even the only threat, though. It was almost certain that there would be—

“Pirates,” Guffer said. “They’ll sure want some of the drake-scales and eggs for themselves. Not to mention what other operations they might have going on at the beach down there.”

“I’ll try to avoid them,” Ulysses said.

“Sure you will, unless you want a cutlass up your arse. Ha!” The Lieutenant took another chocolate out of the box before him and stuffed it in his face. His lips, already smeared with chocolate, became messier. Ulysses smiled ingratiatingly. He was filled with even more revulsion for the man than he’d had before. How could this man be a lieutenant in the noble Scara Brae navy?

“Well, it’s about a two day journey up the coast to Neverscale,” the Lieutenant said. “I suppose you’ll want to get started now. Drake hatching season ends soon, so the sooner you arrive the better. I’ve got to interview your partner before you leave, though.”

“Partner?” Ulysses said, eyebrow creased.

The Lieutenant laughed a wet, guttural laugh. “Sure!” he said. The way he said it, slurring the first few sounds it sounded more like shore. “You didn’t think we’d send a kid like you all alone up Neverscale, did you? Of course you’ll have a partner. He’s waiting outside right now, when you go out would you send him in?”

Ulysses nodded. “Thank you very much, sir.”

Guffer sighed. “You must be awfully strapped for cash if you’re taking a job like this. Just don’t get yourself killed, alright kid?”

“I’ll try not to.” Ulysses said, and he left the Lieutenant’s office and stepped into the main part of the lighthouse.

The lighthouse itself was a fairly small building. Guffer and his vice-lieutenant were the only ones here, and they kept a watch on the surrounding beach and kept the lighthouse running at night. There wasn’t much action in this part of the island; there were too many pirates for trade to really thrive this far away from the city. Ulysses supposed the lighthouse was a last perch of the navy between the dangerous Neverscale Beach and the infamous Hooligan’s Grotto.

The bottom floor of the lighthouse had been divided into two sections: the Lieutenant’s office and the stairway. Beside the stairway there was a small wooden bench. The bench was currently occupied by two people: a red-headed woman and a man Ulysses supposed must be his partner. He motioned for the man to go in, and the man did. He didn’t even really get a good look at him.

Ulysses sat down next to the red-haired woman. She was petite and freckled, and wearing a white uniform that matched the lieutenant’s. Hers, however, had the two few buttons unbuttoned: and was showing a fair amount of cleavage. He blushed and looked away.

“So you’re the other guy you’re sending down to Neverscale, eh?” the woman said. Ulysses nodded. “Well good luck to you. I hope you’re more fun than the other guy, he just seemed like such a downer.”

“Really?” Ulysses said, curious as to the character of his soon-to-be partner.

“Definitely. No fun at all. But maybe you’re a bit more…open-minded?” The woman slid down the bench closer to Ulysses and smiled devilishly. Ulysses eyes widened.

“I’m married,” he said shortly. This was almost true. The woman just pouted and said nothing, and there was a long silence. “So, uh, I heard there’s pirates on the beach?” Ulysses said, desperate to break the silence.

“Mmhmmm,” the woman said, seeming uninterested. “I killed twelve of them myself. Gutted them with one of their own men’s cutlasses.” She smiled again, and Ulysses thought she looked eerily like a cat. “I got promoted from Ensign to Vice-Lieutenant just for that little piece of work. But then they sent me down to watch over old Guffer and I hardly get to have any fun at all anymore. Well. Some fun, I guess.”

Ulysses pondered what kind of person found gutting pirates to be ‘fun.’ He wasn’t sure if he found the Lieutenant or the Vice-Lieutenant to be more disturbing. Thankfully he wouldn’t have to spend much more time in the company of the strange woman. The door opened and his partner walked out. Ulysses looked up at him and smiled in greeting.

“Hey, Jane, want to come in for our own little meeting?” the Lieutenant’s voice came from the other room.

The Vice-Lieutenant giggled and stood up. “Aye aye, captain,” she said, and she rushed into the office and closed the door. Ulysses’ jaw dropped. He was aghast, but he composed himself and stood up to greet his new partner. He stuck a hand out to shake.

“So I guess we’ll be working together?” he said. “Pleased to meet you. Name’s Ulysses.”

[Alister]

A cool ocean breeze blew over the beach, throwing a barrage of sand flakes into the middle-aged wizard, Alister Cain's, face. It had been almost a month since his exploits in the Windlancer Mountain range, but right now he would give anything to be scaling its bronze peaks. Trolls and caves were much more appealing than endless waves, splashing onto the sandy shore. The whole scene, combined with the humidity, made the wizard's empty stomach turn.

So this is... Tropical?

He had always pictured the beach as a sandy get away, filled with blonde bombshells and attractions. This place however, lacked in both categories. With each hobbled step Alister made the soft sand beneath his feet gave way, making the trip that much more of a straining task. It was like trekking across a field full of feather pillows.

For what seemed like hours the wizard walked, but finally his destination was in sight. The lighthouse. A beacon for the sea-faring ships and the navy, well what little navy Scara Brae had. Sir Pallotan had mentioned to Alister that there was fewer than ten ships in the nations fleet, which was pretty pathetic for an island country.

The lighthouse wasn't anything out of the ordinary, structure wise. It was a tall, seemingly wooden construct, that honed a large light near the top. It looked more like the blade of a sword attempting to pierce the afternoon clouds than anything. The only thing the wizard thought was out of the ordinary was the woman who was dancing and prancing about the foot of it.

That must be the young lady Pallotan said to watch out for. Alister thought, trying to remember the label that his noble employer had given her. Harlot, that's what he said.

Above Alister's head was a flock of ivory feather birds. Their annoying squawks gave the wizard an idea of what he would be putting up with in this sandy hell hole in the days ahead. For a moment he thought about throwing a ball of fire towards the sky, with hopes of downing a couple, but his idea was quickly disrupted by-

"You must be the man Sir Pallotan sent!" The lady stopped her rhythemless dance and was now grinning ear to ear at Alister. "You're a bit different than I imagined."

"You must be the beautiful young lieutenant Pallotan spoke of." He lied, trying hard to force a believable smile. "You're exactly what I had expected." That was the truth, Alister's employer had mentioned the annoying high pitch of her voice, and the childish mentality.

"Oh now aren't you just a charmer." A crimson tint grew to cover her cheeks, before using her arms to squeeze her breasts together, creating a noticeable amount of cleavage.

"That's my job." Alister retorted, overjoyed that his glass cane had finally met the wooden planks of the lighthouse. He was still fighting hard to disguise his disgust for the young flirt, never being a fan of desperate women.

"No mister, I think your job is to-"

"It was a joke lady." The lack of company had obviously taken it's toll on the young lady's sense of sarcasm. "Oh and you can stop with the cleavage act now, it's not that impressing." Truth, breasts were a dime a dozen, and Alister didn't fancy himself a breast man any way.

There was a moment of silence, in which the lady released the firm hold she had on her breasts. She had obviously gotten the idea that Alister wasn't interest, that, or she was suddenly not attracted to the wrinkled face mage.

"So where is Guffer? I was hoping to get this show on the road." Alister finally spoke up, stepping past the woman. She was now wearing a blank stare, that hinted confusion. Was it that hard for her to be rejected?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The meeting with the lieutenant, Guffer, went as Alister predicted. The ship hand, turned officer, turned fat paper pusher also met Alister's expectations. Sir Pallotan mentioned that the guy was a slob, but the mess of chocolate and drool proved the theory. Not to mention the man's weight. He was more round than a circle, causing a creak of wood everytime he shifted in his mahogany chair. The room itself was decorated with a variety of sailor mementos, giving it some appeal, but that was washed away with the harsh lingering stench of sweat. Luckily for the wizard he had already been briefed by Pallotan on his duties, making the meeting very short.

Drake hunting couldn't be that hard, could it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the end of their meeting Alister scurried, as fast as a hobble foot wizard could, to exit the room. He feared if he waited any longer, the stench of the room would leave permanent damage, possibly resulting in the destruction of valuable brain cells. Outside Guffer's chambers stood the young lady, who now had a name, Jane. Alister heard it as the hefty officer called her back into the room for their own "private meeting."

Before the wizard could catch his breath he was greeted by his partner, a young brown haired man named Ulysses. The man looked a little small to be a warrior, but looks were often deceiving in Althanas. Alister recalled his last partner, Shisha, who despite his size was quite the fighter.

"The pleasure is mine, Ulysses." Alister revealed the first real smile of the afternoon, reaching out to meet the man's hand. "Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get as far away from this place as possible." The wizard tapped his cane against the floor, motioning for his new partner to follow. If he was lucky, the smell of Guffer would leave his nostrils within the next... Year?

[Ulysses]

It was a little bit like shaking hands with a shark.

Ulysses shook his new partner’s hand, his smile apprehensive as he got his first good look at the man. He was apparently a wizard, or at his black robe suggested that. If he was a warrior, Ulysses didn’t know what kind, since he didn’t appear to have any sort of weapon but a cane. The man’s face was wrinkled and lined, and he had a hobbled foot, but yet something about him didn’t seem that old at all. His smile though…now that was really disturbing. The man was probably trying to seem friendly, maybe it was even genuine, but it looked more like a grimace of pain than a real smile. Ulysses broke the handshake off perhaps a moment too early, and followed the wizard out to the door. The man introduced himself as Alister.

As soon as they walked outside, Ulysses took an enormous breath of fresh air. The smell inside the lighthouse had been vile, but Ulysses couldn’t really put his finger on why. Certainly the lieutenant’s gluttony had been disgusting, and the vice-lieutenant had been disgusting too, in her own way. There was something more to it than that, though. Ulysses didn’t ever want to go back to that lighthouse again, and he wasn’t sure why.

The beach was deserted except for a few seagulls and crabs. The Navy, stingy bastards that they were, hadn’t supplied them with mounts, so they would have to do the journeying on foot. Ulysses started walking up the coast, slowing down to allow the man with the hobble foot to keep up. That foot would probably slow their progress a good bit, and Ulysses wondered how much use the man would be in combat. With a drake bearing down on them, a limp could be quite a liability.

Nonetheless, Ulysses was in good spirits. The ocean air was a familiar scent that reminded him of his childhood. He’d spent most of his early life on docks, on the beach, or in boats. The ocean had always seemed like a sort of third parent to him. Seagulls whirled overhead, screeching their awkward conversations at eachother and bickering over scraps of food. Little green crabs scurried about the beach, popping under the sand and back again. It was close to sunset now, and the sinking light reflected in purples and yellows on the ocean waves and surf. His feet sunk into the warm sand and left a trail of footprints behind him, like a snail’s trail in slime.

He was struck by a vivid memory, as clear as if it had happened to him just the other day. He was standing atop great white cliffs, clad in armor and with a beautiful woman at his side. In this memory, the sun was rising rather than setting, but the effect on the water was similar. The cliffs were made of chalk, he knew, although this seemed impossibly strange. Ulysses realized that this wasn’t his memory at all, but a memory of one of the heroic spirits within him: the Knight.

Is this from your homeland? Ulysses thought excitedly. Learning things about the spirits within him, who were from other universes, never failed to arouse his curiosity. From England?

Yes, the Knight’s voice resonated inside his head. This is Dover. Ulysses pestered him for more information, but the Knight would say no more. Especially he wanted to know the identity of the woman the Knight was standing with. It seemed, however, that would have to come another time, if ever. Still, Ulysses smiled. He thought it was a mark of kindness, or at least of respect that the Knight had shown him that, and he appreciated it.

There was a splash, and Ulysses snapped out of his reverie and turned to the ocean. He then gasped. Out of the ocean leapt a school, or flock of fish, each one with shimmering feathered wings. These were no normal flying fish (who never really flew but merely glided), but magical bird-fish, with wings like a bird’s. It was one of the rarest and most beautiful sights the ocean around Scara Brae had to offer—even in his days as a fisherman, Ulysses had only seen this once or twice. He watched in awe. The fish flew around in loop-de-loops, wet wings and silver feathers glistening in the sunlight, and eventually they plunged back into the ocean.

Surely that was a good omen for the journey to come. Ulysses continued the trek up the beach, feeling optimistic about the future.