Heroine
08-20-06, 09:13 PM
"Well, I don't care if it rains or freezes,
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.
I don't care if it's dark or scary
Long as I have magnetic Mary
Ridin' on the dashboard of my car
I feel I'm protected amply
I've got the whole damn Holy Family
Riding on the dashboard of my car."
To call the red-and-white-checkered sheet of plastic a tablecloth is a crime against good taste, but he did it, sure enough. The drably dressed drow was complaining that his laminated checkerboard of a table covering was torn, and that he wanted it replaced before he came back from the bathroom. Normally this wouldn’t faze Darcy a bit, but after a six-hour shift of cleaning up after noisy, messy ogrelings, she was one nerve away from replacing the patron’s order with the daily special: green noodle strudel. The thing about green noodle strudel, is it’s certainly not strudel, it neither contains, nor even resembles noodle(s), and it’s not even green. Imagine a sink full of expired dairy products, bread crust, rodents, and a party-favor bag full of multicolored rubber erasers. Turn on the garbage disposal, and the end result is the special of the day. Some days are better than others. And coming up with a proper name was always a fun game. In this kind of mood, however, even her smile wouldn’t do her any good.
“Sure thing, pal,” she sighed and clacked her saddle-shoes over to his table and rotated the greasy plastic tablecloth so she could put the sugar caddy on top of the miniscule tear. Clapping the imaginary dust from her hands, she sauntered back behind the counter as the cook dinged the bell.
“Or'der up!”
“Got it,” the girl winked, sliding the plate of “Thaw and Heat Mystery Meat,” from the window across to the customer sitting at the blah-colored counter reading the day’s paper.
“Thank ye’ luv. Ain’t yew the purdy thang?”
“Thanks Merle. Don’t ‘cha ever get tired of the same old plate of food?”
“Naw, keeps mah face pretty,” he drawled, grinning toothlessly.
It was a typical day at the Greasy Spoon Saloon – she got a job serving just to make ends meet. Food and shelter didn’t cost but a few gold pieces if you were willing to sacrifice things like fluffed pillows and nice sheets. There were locking doors and hot showers too, even if there were rusty nails everywhere to snag your hand on. The stairs needed work, the walls were cracked from woodwork to ceiling, and the kitchen was infested with vermin. It was home, though, and despite the life she had been used to back in Murestone, she knew that life was gone. That, and a place like Scara Brea was a much bigger, and that meant feeding her addiction to opiates was a lot easier. She didn’t have to rely on her friend to get something decent to shoot up her arm anymore. Not in this town. So Darcy was just biding her time, watching the clock while sitting on a red plastic swivel-chair, when the darndest thing happened.
Long as I have my plastic Jesus
Riding on the dashboard of my car
Through all trials and tribulations,
We will travel every nation,
With my plastic Jesus I'll go far.
I don't care if it's dark or scary
Long as I have magnetic Mary
Ridin' on the dashboard of my car
I feel I'm protected amply
I've got the whole damn Holy Family
Riding on the dashboard of my car."
To call the red-and-white-checkered sheet of plastic a tablecloth is a crime against good taste, but he did it, sure enough. The drably dressed drow was complaining that his laminated checkerboard of a table covering was torn, and that he wanted it replaced before he came back from the bathroom. Normally this wouldn’t faze Darcy a bit, but after a six-hour shift of cleaning up after noisy, messy ogrelings, she was one nerve away from replacing the patron’s order with the daily special: green noodle strudel. The thing about green noodle strudel, is it’s certainly not strudel, it neither contains, nor even resembles noodle(s), and it’s not even green. Imagine a sink full of expired dairy products, bread crust, rodents, and a party-favor bag full of multicolored rubber erasers. Turn on the garbage disposal, and the end result is the special of the day. Some days are better than others. And coming up with a proper name was always a fun game. In this kind of mood, however, even her smile wouldn’t do her any good.
“Sure thing, pal,” she sighed and clacked her saddle-shoes over to his table and rotated the greasy plastic tablecloth so she could put the sugar caddy on top of the miniscule tear. Clapping the imaginary dust from her hands, she sauntered back behind the counter as the cook dinged the bell.
“Or'der up!”
“Got it,” the girl winked, sliding the plate of “Thaw and Heat Mystery Meat,” from the window across to the customer sitting at the blah-colored counter reading the day’s paper.
“Thank ye’ luv. Ain’t yew the purdy thang?”
“Thanks Merle. Don’t ‘cha ever get tired of the same old plate of food?”
“Naw, keeps mah face pretty,” he drawled, grinning toothlessly.
It was a typical day at the Greasy Spoon Saloon – she got a job serving just to make ends meet. Food and shelter didn’t cost but a few gold pieces if you were willing to sacrifice things like fluffed pillows and nice sheets. There were locking doors and hot showers too, even if there were rusty nails everywhere to snag your hand on. The stairs needed work, the walls were cracked from woodwork to ceiling, and the kitchen was infested with vermin. It was home, though, and despite the life she had been used to back in Murestone, she knew that life was gone. That, and a place like Scara Brea was a much bigger, and that meant feeding her addiction to opiates was a lot easier. She didn’t have to rely on her friend to get something decent to shoot up her arm anymore. Not in this town. So Darcy was just biding her time, watching the clock while sitting on a red plastic swivel-chair, when the darndest thing happened.