OOC One-liners

[Wynken]

Welcome to a forum game I had been thinking of: Out of Context One-liners. Post something that you find funny, a movie quote, stand up bit, joke punchline, witticism from your friend Steve, etc.; but it must be one line and devoid of context. As funny as these things are with a bit of setup, they can be even better at random. My first entry:

"When he sticks his finger in my butt I'll prove I should be the star of 'Our Town'.

[Silence Sei]

"Isn't that great? That look of terror before they die?"

[Revenant]

"God damn it, just punch Satan in the dick."

[Dissinger]

"Septimus had never before drawn a pistol on his master, and Talos had never before had one of his slaves tell him to 'Eat Shit'"

[Aurelianus Drak'shal]

"Septimus had never before drawn a pistol on his master, and Talos had never before had one of his slaves tell him to 'Eat Shit'"

For starters, fuck yeah Dissinger! Ave Dominus Nox!

And as for my quote-

"I swear to Christ, your head is going up the driver's ass, his head is going up your ass, and you drew the short stick, cause your head is going up my ass! "

[Ebivoulya]

'I love sex but...I love sex-butt.'

[absentwizard]

"A sword in the hands of God makes a king. A sword in the hands of a king makes a knight. A sword in the hands of a knight makes a corpse. Thus justice flows."

[Aurelianus Drak'shal]

[Luned] I'd be totally okay with being tender and moist with Skie

Oh fuck the Hell yes

[Ebivoulya]

'Ricky, those laws are there to protect kids, not to allow goofballs like you to put them in a car with no door on it, and drive around the fuckin' neighborhood stealin' barbeques!'

[Luned]

"Yes, touch my giant, green, chiseled buttcheeks... and I will crush your head in them"

[Aurelianus Drak'shal]

My anus has finally decided to eat my hand!! It hungers... for more...

[Ashla]

"Hungry? careful not to choke on your 'stew-pidity'"