Heavy Hearts and Heavy Scars

[Ashla]

Closed to Tobias Stalt.




~~~

Ashla knew why she was here.

She was attempting to escape from her old life and start anew. Since Eiskalt, her life had changed drastically once again... and this time probably for the good. Ashla had left Eiskalt, knowing she was incapable of leading the poor country, alongside Julius. They had resolved to stick together and start a life as a family. Since then, they had pondered their fates. What to do? Where to go? Julius had considered joining the Ixian Knights. Ashla knew their leader Kyla and personally considered her a close friend and even a role model. However, something inside Ashla has screamed no. Was it regret of drawing the knights into the war? Was it the inner anger of the eventual withdrawal? Whatever it was, Ashla had quickly turned his suggestion down.


Somehow though, she still found herself here. In the thick forests which hid that castle, Concordia. It was actually quite a beautiful place. Ashla breathed in the fresh smells of the trees and grass and attuned her ears to the birds singing. It was a beautiful morning in her eyes, dew was still wet on the ground and it was cold – but Ashla was used to it being much colder. Ashla sighed when her home country, Eiskalt, came into her mind. The marvelous snow capped mountain ranges, the navy blue waters of Lake Hope. The name of that lake, as wonderful as the lake looked, was ironic to the former duchess. There had been no hope in Eiskalt. It had helped her grow, yes. It had also taught her about who she really was, it was true… but one thing that wasn't found in that country was hope. War had torn it apart, Ashla had failed to save it.


And that was why Ashla had left it. She and Julius both left it. They knew they had no life there, even to help their own country. Thus, they had decided to burn the pages and start a new book. As a family.


Ashla was on her own now, as Julius Tabor was still in the closest town. Ashla had decided to take some time alone… she needed it. She had finally started to break away from the depression and despair that had found her in Eiskalt, and she was just going to keep pushing out even more. Her uncle, Monte Icebreaker, had taught her to long ago. Ashla however, could never escape her head. She had attempted to drawn herself to her surroundings to keep her mind occupied, but her thoughts of hopelessness still bound onto her.


Ashla hated her mind like heck.


She sighed, refusing to give into herself just yet, and silently walked on. She began to hum to herself. The girl had a dainty voice; it was eerie but also had some roughness to it. She began to hum to herself… and it was working.


Ashla smiled as she hummed a song her uncle had sung to her when she was a child. One that’s lyrics had long been forgotten, but she had always loved the tune. She smiled, walked, and hummed in a happy pace down a small path in the woodland around her.

However, she looked ahead on the path to see… a person. He was walking across the path as well. Ashla stopped humming and tilted her head in the innocent look she had kept from her childhood. She shrugged and smiled again. She wouldn't let the sudden appearance of a stranger put her off from this splendid day. This man was still a long ways off, just enough to see him from the smooth, rocky path they were on. From here, only one with the eyesight of an elf would be able to tell out this person from anything outside the fact that… he was a person.

Ashla continued to walk in her way… minus the humming this time. Nothing could ruin this fine morning… right?

[Tobias Stalt]

Nothing was left that could surprise him. Tobias had been in Corone for less than three months, and it had already sent him in a million different directions. He was tired, and he was annoyed. The hood over his head served to keep the sun out of his eyes, but the sweltering heat left him constantly wiping the sweat from them. "You trade one problem for another," he complained aloud, "must be some kind of universal truth."

The gruff statement of disdain melted into silent discontentment when he saw another figure on the road ahead, and he kept his face obscured with a bowed head. The next Inn was less than a day's walk, if the man he'd asked had been telling it true. If he could make it that far without incident, he could sleep. At least for one night, he wished, he could close his eyes and rest easy.

It was little more than a dream, he knew. The moment he let his guard fall, an assassin would jump at the chance. He maintained that belief, anyway, and it had kept him alive this long. Beneath his cloak, his hand fidgeted on the pommel of a long knife, an itch to draw the weapon burned into his fingers. The problem with living on the run, Tobias had observed, was an unhealthy amount of paranoia. He had run because he did not want to kill anyone. Now, his mind frequently told him to be ready to kill anyone. Perhaps Lye had won in a more disturbing way than Tobias cared to admit.

Lye, that sadistic bastard. Tobias pressed the images of Camille's graceless final moments, whimpering in his arms, from his mind. His golden eyes squinted shut, and he shivered in revulsion at the terror that washed over him. Fear, not of Lye, but of the failure that still plagued him. His oversight had cost Camille everything, and Tobias, she had meant so much. There would always be a hole in him that could not be filled, but he did not have the luxury of loosing tears about it.

No, the time for mourning had past with that night. He put as much distance between himself and Eiskalt as he could, and he had burned all the records he could on his way out. Tobias Stalt was a memory in the minds of his men, but he had wanted to ensure it would be immensely hard for Lye and his henchmen to follow him. He gave only shadows, rumors, whispers for the Order to follow. No great deeds from a mighty man.

Tobias had resolved to become no one, the way he had been before. He disappeared. Now here he was in Corone. As he passed the woman by, he failed to say anything at all. Instead, he glanced at her feet for a moment out of courtesy, then began to take the turn toward his destination.

He was not far, now. The vicious, black blade slipped an inch free of its scabbard, yet he did not fully draw it. He would let it drop once he was safely inside. He could feel her eyes on him, watchful, and he did not like it. He hated any attention at all. How had it come to this? Tobias took a breath to calm his heart, and gulped back some of his worries.

Soon, he would have ale.

[Ashla]

Ashla recognized the man instantly.

Tobias Stalt.

One of the men who had led the enemy of Eiskalt into war and had even poisoned the entire country. Ashla remembered how she had loathed him at first, then had offered him a deal. He would give her all the information he knew if she granted him his freedom.

... And she had spoken to them.

Neither King Fulgur II nor Julius were too thrilled with her even communing with the soldier and had spoken down on her like a she was a child. Ashla sighed as they passed by in a flash. Ashla stopped in her tracks and glanced back at him. Her perfect mood had been ruined by one man. While yes, he was hooded and cloaked, she had been able to tell it was him. Curiosity pricked at her mind, what had he done since that time? Ashla felt another bolt of anger surge through her. If he hadn't done the damage he had done to Eiskalt, the entire war could have gone differently.

Ashla tried what she had always tried since she had left and attempted to let it go. Eiskalt didn't matter now, nor did Tobias. She was starting again, and so should he ... and yet she couldn't let go like usual. Something truly tugged at her about him, and she hated it. She let out a low growl and just stood there, watching him.

The day was bright, sunshine beamed through the green trees and onto the path they were treading in. It offered up a cheery mood - one that Ashla had now tossed away in a flash. The girl turned around to go on her way again, this man meant nothing to her...

... Or did he?

Would she face an old adversary again? Or would she truly leave everything behind? Was this a test? A test of her new determination and ability to forgive? Could she never forgive? She had learned about forgiveness back when she first came to Eiskalt. "If I can't forgive you, I am no better than you." Yet now, pure hatred dripped from her like pure, red blood. It was not apparent through her gaze, all it portrayed was a look of strange denial. She was denying everything right now... What would happen next now? Would they simply move on, or would they be brought together again?

[Tobias Stalt]

He was almost free.

Her eyes on his back felt like chains attempting to drag him down to hell, but Tobias refused to take the bait. He would not look up from the ground. Mere yards separated him from his drink, and from the ability to drown all his problems for the next twelve hours. A pillow under his head would offer him comfort, if not actual sleep. All he had to do was pass by this singular obstacle without a scene.

The blade was fully in his grip now, exposed from its leathery bed, but it still lay beneath folds of black. He slowed his walk just enough, and his eyes closed. He had to keep his cool. The door handle was within reach, and his gaze flickered up absently to the woman. Recognition in his eyes froze him like the ice that covered Eiskalt.

No. He would not be dragged into this. His hand seized the knob and twisted, and he pulled it open with more force than he meant to. Two steps in, and the door creaked shut behind. A dark room, open and precariously illuminated by candlelight, greeted him with the delicious scent of sweet rolls. "Aye, welcome to the Leaf and Loaf," the proprietor greeted. "A drink for ye? A room?"

"A room and a drink would be nice," Tobias replied quickly. "Ale. A winter brew, if you've any left." He was relieved to hear that their seasonal stock had not dried up. Less than a minute passed before he held a flagon in hand, and he drained it of dry, pale fluid as quickly as he dared.

The bittersweet flavor rolled over his tongue, and he smiled as he reveled in the flavor he had not tasted in months. "Here," he said offhand, and he dropped some gold on the table. "Keep them coming, if you please."

For some reason, he expected company.

[Ashla]

Ashla just watched him go. Just like that.

He kept walking until he vanished from her view. From there on out, Ashla just stood there. A gust of wind broke loose, green leaves swirled around her and spread across the stone path. Ashla kept looking on... and then shook her head. That's behind me now... And she turned to walk away. And she walked the other way. She forced her mind off Stalt and paid attention to the birds singing in the trees above. They sounded so lovely, the way they flew around too. She enjoyed looking at their various colors and sizes, and hearing them twitter those lovely tunes... And they seemed so happy, so cheerful, and Ashla knew she was that way herself. Happy, cheerful, new, sweet...

...

... Screw that last paragraph.

Now, Ashla was suddenly racing as fast as she could. She was racing in the same direction as Tobias Stalt. Racing to find him. She threw away her 'new book' for once and decided to write an epilogue in the last one. She raced as fast as she could. Her black boots making constant sounds against the stone path below her. She kept on running up until she finally saw him...

He was just entering a pub.

Ashla took a moment to catch her breath, leaning against the nearest tree. She then pushed herself up again and threw her black cloak over her head. She took a deep breath and entered the diner. This would be... interesting...

[Tobias Stalt]

Halfway through his first ale, Tobias deposited the unsheathed dagger in his lap and reclined lazily. Had she opted not to follow him? Had he been paranoid of her intentions for naught? There were doubts that riddled his mind, but Tobias refused to give them voice. The bartender was good company; the man asked no questions and kept his tankard topped off. Tobias had a penchant for paying well, and he expected proper service. This man obviously had respect for coin.

"Your room is upstairs to the left," the owner called to him, "my wife has prepared clean linens for you."

"Much appreciated," Tobias replied. He preferred to keep the conversations short and filled with as little information as he could manage. They seemed more interested in what lined his pockets than what his story was. He suspected that this area was full of colorful people, and the locals were better off not knowing things. He'd heard that the Ixians dwelt in the Concordian forest, so it made sense.

"Another ale?" The barkeep stared in disbelief at the emptied tankard as Tobias grinned up at him. "You've a mighty thirst, boy."

"Many memories, not enough swill." Tobias offered the sardonic reply with a sincere laugh. The man, eyeing a glass he'd just wiped down, chortled in reply.

"Too often that seems to be the case," came the honest response. Tobias muttered about how he'd "drink to that," and he did. A quiet burp escaped the former soldier, and he slipped a hand over his mouth in embarrassment. "Not used to Coronian Ale, eh?"

"I drank Alerian for a year," he admitted. "Not rich like Raieran gold, nor bitter like Salvic piss. It has a definitive bite, but goes down smoothly. This Coronian swill sneaks up on you. Gentle at first, but vicious."

"It's an age old recipe," the barkeep admitted, "you've a very experienced taste." It was a complement Tobias smiled at. "It's the hops they pick, usually from the Gisela region, see. If it's not from there, you can taste a difference. It's more like a barley or wheat flavor. Dry, bitter, almost too robust to stomach properly. The Giselan stuff is the best because it ferments better. Smooth flavor, more alcoholic."

Tobias stared into the liquid as the man told him about the creation of his favorite drink. "I've a new drink of choice, I think," he mumbled as the door opened behind him. He took another swig, then released a soft sigh.

"Welcome to the Leaf and Loaf!" The wife of the owner called this time, her voice somewhere on the floor above.

[Ashla]

Ashla just stood there. She just stood there. Watching his every move. He looked exhausted, both physically and emotionally... like herself. He was slumped an was already was showing the tired motions of being drunk. The circles under his eyes also gave it away... and that look in his eyes. It was void and lacked life. Ashla, once again, felt pity on him. She had finally felt sorry for him late last time, but this time was different. Ashla decided to avoid him for now and give him his rest. She walked over to the counter to order something light to drink.

The bartender smiled, "Why hello there," he approached the hooded Icebreaker, "What's such a beautiful young lady doing with such a low sprites?"

Ashla suddenly realized that she herself had been lacking sleep. She herself had circles under her eyes, and she was incredibly pale. Ashla just then let out a yawn. She also remembered the pity she felt for Tobias Stalt. She threw her hood off, revealing her shocking black hair. She lied to the bartender, "Dunno."

She then got down to business, "A hot apple cider, please?"

The bartender smiled, "We have the sweetest apple cider around here. Made from the juiciest apples. Coming right up!"

While she waited, Ashla began to watch Stalt's movements again as he looked from the counter to a woman in the above rooms. Ashla is discrete, yet from the corner of her eyes she still watched carefully.

[Tobias Stalt]

The barkeep suspected Tobias was less influenced by the alcohol than he seemed, but he kept the opinion to himself. He'd noticed the sinister gleam of the weapon in the lad's lap only by a stroke of luck, and he pieced together that something was amiss. He hoped to keep the situation from becoming violent by keeping both of these patrons well hydrated and away from each other. It was the way that this woman stared that told him Tobias was wary of her and not someone else, though she gave the drink steward little reason to believe she was an imminent thread to the man.

Tobias knew that the barkeep had noticed his weapon by the gleam of sweat that beaded on his brow. His golden eyes locked with the older man for a brief moment, and the man tilted his head as if to beseech the man not to shed blood in his establishment. Tobias ran a finger over the dagger idly. "Upstairs and to the left?" He asked, repeating the directions the barkeep had offered him before.

"Aye," the man said, somewhat relieved. "I'll close out your tab if you're ready to turn in for the night." Tobias nodded to confirm he was. The elder man turned his gaze to Ashla as he set a cider down in front of her, and as Tobias sauntered toward the stairs and tucked his dagger silently away, he leaned forward to whisper. "I don't know why you're following that boy," he told her, "but I strongly suggest you don't do it anymore."

He pulled back and began to wipe down the glass Tobias had been using. As the former soldier disappeared from view, the barkeep spoke to Ashla again. "If you have business with him, please approach him directly. If you must resort to violence, please don't do it in my inn. That's all I ask."

In the room above, Tobias took stock of his surroundings. Spartan, by the look of it; bare walls with a muted green paint, a desk with a chair, and a bed. There was no closet, though the floor had a finely woven oriental rug covering hard wood. It was big enough for two people, though comfortable for just one. The only obvious exit was the door that led into the main corridor, but the window would offer a secondary escape route if it became prudent.

Tobias inwardly hoped the woman had no business with him. He dropped the cloak and unbuttoned the tattered grays to reveal his scarred and bruised chest. The weight of Blackheart fell from his shoulders and plopped onto the bed unceremoniously. Both the hilts of his daggers remained at either hip, so he was never fully disarmed.

He sat himself down at his desk, removed the black journal from his hip, and Tobias began to write. Since Eiskalt, he had strained to remember names and faces of the fallen. People he had never met, dead in the streets, flashed in his memories. On the empty pages, he described them in detail and documented the manner of their death. It was the kindest service he could offer them, only far too late.

The door to his room remained unlocked. He had every intention of waiting for her. It was better this way, just the two of them. Better if no one could hear or see them. There were things too unsafe to say in the open, and it would be best if they were not seen together.

[Ashla]

Ashla watched Tobias walk up the stairs... she followed.

She walked down the hallway... she followed.

He walked up to a doorway and into a room... She hid behind the wall beside the door.

The wooden door was closed, but Ashla had not heard him lock it. She had remained hidden the entire time, had he noticed she was following him. Ashla blinked, maybe it wasn't a good idea to have followed him. Besides, they have come off roughly being "friends", but what if he hated her? Since, well, everybody seemed to hate Ashla. The Icebreaker sighed though, what if something positive could come out of this? Who knew, maybe she could find some closure in meeting someone who was even an enemy of her country.

Ashla let out one, major sigh. She was going to do this. She placed her hand on her sword and closed her eyes, collection herself. She let go of her sword and then lifted her hand to the heavy oak door. She formed a fist and knocked. She then took several paces back, being sure that she was ready to whip out her broadsword at any second.

What good could possibly come out from meeting an enemy? The hallway was bleak and vacant, it seemed as poor as Ashla's soul. She was damaged, damaged by discovering her true roots and being thrown into the forsaken war. Why was she doing this? What closure or reassurance that it wasn't her fault could come out of this? She suddenly realized though that it was him who had poisoned the citizens. It was him who had polluted the water supply. It was him who had caused so much damage upon her people. She suddenly grew angry, even her eyes briefly entered their frozen form. Suddenly, she realised what she wanted...

... Revenge.

[Tobias Stalt]

The door creaked slowly open when she knocked. On the desk, his journal lay open to an empty page, and the quill rested neatly in the ink well. When Ashla looked in, Tobias was nowhere to be seen. She stood with her blade at the ready, but no one to unleash it on.

Tobias could hear her breathing outside the door. He kept his back pressed to the wall and held his dagger firmly in hand. Whatever coursed through her mind, it was beyond him to know. All he knew was that she had followed him, and she had been at Eiskalt. Had Lye cut a deal with the haughty princess? His head in exchange for her kingdom's freedom from oppression? News of Eiskalt's fate had not reached him, but her presence boded foul for the secluded nation.

The door creaked further as it slid open, and the dark haired woman emerged into his room. Before she had the chance to turn, Tobias lifted the dagger to her throat. "What do you want?" he asked with the tip of the blade pointed toward her jugular. He bid her to come all the way into the room. It was better if they conducted business behind closed doors. "You should not have come here."

His body was a pale, ghostly sight. Scars littered his torso, most notably of which was the gash above his heart. The blade appeared to have entered deep into his body mere inches from his heart. It looked horrifying. "Drop your weapon or I'll slit your throat. I'll sleep like a baby tonight even with your body on my floor."

The gruesome cleanup was certainly a deterrent, but more than that, Tobias hated the concept of killing. If he could avoid bloodshed, he would. His greatest drive right now was preserving his own life. "How many are you? How many did Lye send with you to kill me?"

He pulled her into the room and slammed the door shut behind him. She was small, but deceptively strong. Her resistance was lessened by the prospect of breathing her own blood. His eyes narrowed and he glanced toward the window, paranoid. The deadly golden gaze tore back toward Ashla, frantic. "No one has to die. Tell me everything. I need to know everything."

[Ashla]

Ashla was speechless, and for more than one reason... First, he put her at knife-point, then he assumes that she is working for the very man who attacked Eiskalt! She growled, "How dare you..." She whispered barely enough for anyone to hear. The knife, still pointed at her, riled up the former duchess's nerves. Her eyes forming their crisp, ice fever of rage. "I don't know what's going through you sick mind," Ashla's small voice bled with rage, "But I would never... Work for a man... Like..."

She growled as she finished her sentence, "Like him!" A tear fell from her eye, but Ashla did not care, "I am not obliged to answer any of your questions." The Icebreaker warned him, "But I do have questions for you."

The room would have been dead silent then. Silent if it weren't for the fact that the window of the room was cracked open, and a steady breeze was blowing in. Ashla just stood there, frozen as her family to the spot. She would not break in front of him. She felt her enemy's blade slightly piercing her skin to the point where her neck bled. Red trickles of sweat tickled her as they slid down. The dagger itself made Ashla sting to the point of her wanted to step back... and she did.

Even while she took two steps back, the girl seemed emotionless, pale, statue cold. Yet, Ashla was horrified at the giant scar on Tobias' chest. It marked what had perhaps been a close to death injury. Ashla only blinked in the midst of all of this. She kept telling herself that she didn't care for him, and that only his explanation, served with a siding of his death was all that she cared about.

Yet, her heart still was there. And while it was not well, at least it was alive. She knew better than this. She had tried to leave everything behind, she really had... but there was a difference between a try and a success. Ashla felt a burning hatred at one end, but a deep sorrow for this man at the other. He was pale and looked as if he was severely lacking sleep. He was white and had circles under his eyes. Dreary eyes reminded Ashla of herself; feeling so lifeless and vacant... and yet Ashla still wanted to hill him.

[Tobias Stalt]

He heard her emphatic denial of Lye and relaxed only a bit. Blood trickled from the tiny wound at her neck and Tobias cringed. He disliked the idea of harming anyone who did not deserve it. Ashla Icebreaker was far from deserving. "Alright," he said quietly as he lowered the weapon and wiped away her blood. The smear of frigid, royal crimson stained his hand- more innocent Eiskaltian ink on his ledger. "Ask your questions," he murmured as he stowed his dagger and ambled toward the open journal. "If you aren't here with orders to kill me, I have nothing worth asking you anyway."

There was nothing to conceal from the Lady Icebreaker. She knew of his involvement in the conflict, though it was unlikely she was aware of his ignorance of Lye's psychotic notions of absolute control. He had doubts that she knew anything about how he had tried- unsuccessfully- to smuggle the Alerian forces to freedom. Tobias doubted Ashla knew that everyone who had opposed Lye was dead, except for him.

Why he was alive, Tobias could not die. So many times he had lived when so many others had not. He sat somberly in the chair, drew the quill, and he began to scrawl an image on the page. Before Ashla began to speak, Tobias started to give life to an image. He could not begin to tell her his tale, and so, he waited for her to ask specific questions. Perhaps that would help him find the place to start.

The page brightened with each stroke of the feather; whereas Tobias looked dead and without feeling, his hands moved freely and quickly, and their craft seemed lively as a spring day. He glanced up at her once, smiled, then looked back down to his toil.

A tear rolled down and spilled on the page. It stained the words scribbled beneath an image, and he quickly wiped it so that it would not smear. No place in the world was safe. This woman's very presence told him that. He shook his head and closed the book, and the likeness of Ashla Icebreaker was hidden from prying eyes. He doubted she had seen it, or the words "Duchess of Eiskalt, Ashla Icebreaker."

"So," he asked, "what is it you want to know?"

[Ashla]

Ashla watched him scribble in his book. The room was a bit too dark to see what he was writing down, but Ashla felt somewhat suspicious. With how paranoid he had been several moments before, how had he suddenly calmed down? Ashla then remembered how she too could snap moods in an instant; it made her unbelievable. Ashla sighed, the way he had smiled at her suggested that not all between them couldn't be bitter. And like stated several moments ago, her mood changed instantly.

Ashla no longer felt the blood-lust, but she was still angry. However, the anger came off as sour sorrow through her expression and her eyes. She sighed and spoke after several moments of silence. "Why did you do it?"

He should have know what she meant instantly. Ashla was asking why he attacked her country. Why he killed thousands with that wretched disease. Why he poisoned the food and water. Why he had caused all that death a destruction. Ashla remembered back to her oldest uncle Fulgur I, at first he had appeared to be nothing but a twisted creature to Ashla. But after she had been willing to let go of her own story and look into his, she saw that they sorrowfully had similar traits. They both wanted to be perfect, one way or another. They also felt a deep disappointment in their own family - although that was for different reasons. Once again, Tobias' smile echoed in her brain. Perhaps Mr. Stalt wasn't nothing but a blood thirsty monster either.

[Tobias Stalt]

He closed his eyes at the words. He smiled, but he wanted to scream. She brought it up- he knew she would- and everything came rushing back. At anyone else, Tobias might have snapped, but not at Ashla. She had every reason to kill him and he knew it. It was best not to give her another. "It started with a lie," he replied honestly. It came from him so matter-of-factly, even he felt the assessment was surreal. "It all started with a lie."

He pressed the journal into place at his side and slowly rose from his seat. Turning to face her, his sorrowful eyes slowly slid open, and he sighed. "I was issued orders to enter Eiskalt diplomatically and offer treaty." She knew this part of the tale, though there were things beneath the surface that, at the time they had met, even Tobias had not known. "Lye had discreetly informed the guild of Alchemists of the presence of precious ores in Eiskalt. Their interest was piqued, so they allocated a division to the task of retrieval. That was the 908th."

He looked away, tearing his gaze from the chilled blue of Ashla's. He refused to feel her pain atop his own. "I was directed that any force necessary to appropriate the land, should the local government prove non-compliant, was authorized. That was about the time I realized something was amiss."

He fidgeted uncomfortably, feeling her scrutiny heavy on him. "Lye was sent with my unit as a liaison. I had no reason to believe the decision was prompted illegally or through devious means, so I did not question the directive." He looked broken in that instant. Confused, lost, and vulnerable. "He told me things- a future bereft of agony, his dream for a better world. He told me that with my skill as a strategist, we could wipe away any opposition to that dream. He said that with my talent, we could create that world. And he said that Eiskalt was the first of many broken societies that needed to be... well... he used the word "modified." What he meant, I found all too late, was "eradicated."

"I can recite down to the unit where each of those teams was dispatched," he said, "but the kill orders did not come from me. I was very specific with each of the squad leaders. Kill only military and those who resist violently. Avoid citizenry. We are allies of Eiskalt..." Tobias clapped his hand over his mouth and doubled over as he remembered his words. He remembered the report that came, and he remembered seeing the terrible effects of the poison. All of those things had been provided and commanded by the Crimson Hand.

Vomit bled through his fingers as he emptied his stomach, repulsed by himself. "Allies," he repeated weakly, through a fit of coughing. "He betrayed his allies... All the gods damn him..."

Tears streamed down his cheeks, half from the sickness that had come upon him, half from the images of Camille dancing through his mind. "His own people..." Tobias could not bring himself to continue. He shook his head and freed himself from the memory. "I surrendered myself for my involvement, but I am not a kinslayer."

[Ashla]

Ew. Ashla observed, He vomited...

Ashla's eyes portrayed disgust, and not just in the fact that Tobias had thrown up. He had been lied to, cheated, betrayed. Ashla realized that once again, they held much similarities. Her entire life, Ashla had been lied to about her heritage, her family, and even her country. It wasn't until she met Fulgur I's song Fulgur II that everything had become clear to her... the scars from her self-violent reaction still remained on her wrists.

Ashla's one hand reached for her lower arm, covered with a black glove. Beneath it were dozens of barely visible scars, and the only visible scars on her entire body. Up to this day she wondered why the heck she had cut herself... Tobias seemed to have the same questioning on a much larger rate. Ashla still wanted to kill him, but that feeling was barely there still. In fact, as Tobias cried, Ashla felt tears falling down her own face as well. Her vision was blurred immensely by the water clouding her eyes. Ashla sighed, placing her same hand on her forehead and stepping back to lean against the wall. "I hate..." She moaned, "... Manipulators..."

Ashla let out a larger sigh, her sorrow bleeding through again, "I..." She closed her eyes, "I couldn't defend my country from even the blind..." Ashla's hand suddenly whammed against the rough, wood wall in a clenched fist. Her eyes turning ice cold once again. "Curse that Lye!"

She then lifted her other arm to rub her tears away. After she had cleared her eyes she set them on Tobias again, I want to forgive you... but I can't. Ashla wished she had learned all her lessons, but she was of course a slow learner. She still was stubborn as ever, reckless in battle... She had even close to ruined her relationship with her beloved Julius Tabor more than once, and she still held the curse of hatred. She had forgiven her uncle, and she was free of him. But Lye - and yes, Tobias - had destroyed more lives than just her's this time. Was perhaps, her uncle and her early life just a test? Had her life up until now been only a preparation for the torture she was enduring now? But how could it only get worse from here? Ashla had learned to keep striving on, to keep living, that was one lesson she had down. However, as much as her body moved, the Icebreaker could not help but still feel dead inside.

Ashla had been cursing more than just Lye this night...

I want to forgive you... I can feel your pain... But... "I can't..."

[Tobias Stalt]

The acrid bile pooled on the floor as he flicked it away in disgust. Tobias wiped his hands on the carpet as though he were trying to scour away his sins, but he succeeded only in irritating his palms. He hissed in pain at the sensation and jerked his hands back to his chest, rubbing them gently to assuage some of the burning. "Cursing him changes nothing," Tobias snorted. His eyes glassed over at the very thought; he had been within inches of taking Lichensith's life. Lye had the same opportunity, and Tobias had the scar to prove it.

But in the end, violence had profited neither man. Stalt's hand traced absently over the horrid scar that streaked over his heart as though someone had cut him open and ripped it out, still beating. He did not look at Ashla, but the soldier obliged her express inability to do something as he reached for his cloak. "You can't," Tobias agreed.

He hid himself in the darkness again. The cloak covered all his human qualities and imperfections in a veil of cloth. When he lifted Blackheart, the bed rose slightly as though a burden had been taken from it. "I've tarried long enough." With a casual wave of his hand, he indicated the bed. "Use this room for the night, if you like. It's paid for."

Lifting the hood over his head, Tobias slung the Dehlar weapon onto his back. "I'm leaving. You'll never have to see me again after this; just forget you've seen me, and the Crimson Hand will leave you be."

Tobias paused at the door with a hand absently on the knob. He felt terrible for leaving her, but he had no sympathy to offer her. All that he had done, he had shown himself repentant for. Any inability to forgive him was her own burden to bear, and the former soldier had no time to deal with it. "Princess," he called back over his shoulder, surprised by his own words. "The world is an unforgiving place. It's cruel, and it's unfair."

He looked back at her and offered a kind smile. "Be better than the world. That's the only way to survive." The door creaked open, and Tobias took a step through it. He could see freedom.

"No one should have to die," he said quietly, "for someone else to be happy."

[Ashla]

"Be better than the world."

Ashla blinked as he turned to leave, those words were so familiar, "I told myself I was better than them the entire time..." Ashla stated, "But..." She looked over to Tobias to see if he would stop. She didn't know why, but she felt defiance in his words... She had told herself that, once again, a million times.

Back when Ashla was first on her own, roaming Fallien's heated deserts like a bug on a wall, she had been different. The Icebreaker was once youthful, full of life, determined... Now Ashla was still this shell. She was bold once, long ago. She was always smiling on the outside, crying on the inside, and overall telling herself to keep pushing... to make a difference. But oh, as the time changes, so will the person. As Ashla moved on from Fallien and into places like Corone, she seemed to have left her young self behind. Joining the Althanas Leagues, failing superbly, then finally meeting her cousin Fulgur II. Finally figuring out the truth about her family, and how she had been formed an outcast. Going to Eiskalt, freezing over herself with all the pain and hate from her uncle and the Eiskalt War... She now would always look back and ask herself, What happened to me?

Ashla would always find no answer. One thing Tobias said was correct though, the world was unforgiving, cruel, and unfair. She wished she could turn back time, walk a different path. If she and Fulgur had never met then went to Eiskalt in the first place, would none of this happened? Ashla had broken down inside, she had cried. Once, her heart had only been broken, but later Ashla felt yet another kind of heart... a cold heart,

There was a difference between a broken heart and a cold heart.

There was a different between just pain and full out hate.

It had left Ashla confused, devastated, vacant. She knew of nothing left. And now we return to the hotel room of the bar she and Tobias were in. Ashla just stood there, she wanted to confirm somethings with this man. Did he even know what the world had done to her? She should have known his statement clearly. And in the midst of this an age old question of her recent life came up to her. Was killing the answer? The two basic answers were at tug-a-war in Ashla's brain on that.

[Tobias Stalt]

"The world waits for no one," he reminded himself as the door shut. His eyes closed and the resonance of her voice stuck with him for all of three steps. He descended the oaken stairs into the main hall, and he greeted the barkeep warmly.

"Here's for the night," he said to the man, "see that she's fed and given a good bath." Tobias let a sizable pile of coin drip from his hand to the counter with a clatter. He looked up at the leering old man and smirked. "When she asks after me, give her this."

Stalt produced a missive from his cloak, and he scrawled a message out on it. The words detailed not an apology, but information on Tobias' last confirmed location of Lichensith Ulroke- the man who had ruined both of their lives. Though Tobias had no intention of ever crossing paths with any one person from his past again, he wished Ashla Icebreaker well all the same.

He folded the paper neatly and handed it to the barkeep, who tucked it safely away. Tobias nodded, then turned for the door. He had stayed too long already, and if anyone had been watching, they had people headed in his direction already. Assassins would not kill anyone other than Tobias- a blood trail, he had learned, was too much mess to clean up. One death left fewer strings to follow. That meant he was both safer on his own and taking a much greater risk.

He let the door shut quietly behind him, whistling an old Alerian war song as he went. The night had broken gently over the forest, and moonlight cast long shadows across his path. Soon, he would find a place to sleep the night and avoid prying eyes, and then he would be at relative peace.

Not once did Tobias Stalt look back, neither for his coin nor memories of wounds not mended. He had become a believer in the dissonance of life; nothing that happened was fully within mortal control, and when it was, events went into motion to shatter the illusion of command. Order existed only in fleeting instants, then it scattered to the wind. Tobias tried to offer a semblance of order in whatever way he could, if only to put the masses at ease, but he knew his own limits.

It was best to leave the wayward Ashla to her own devices, lest she decide to get violent. The girl had one answer and a hundred more questions to go with it. Now, Tobias had set her on course for a new source: Lye. The former soldier chuckled. "My gift to you, Ulroke," he jeered toward the phantom of his nemesis. "She's your problem now."

Before dawn, Tobias was long gone.

[Ashla]

Instead of turning back to answer, Stalt had closed the door. Ashla frowned, she still wanted to speak to him... yet... instead she turned to take off her battle gear. She would leave him in peace. She closed her eyes as she slipped her gloves off, the Icebreaker threw them on the bed then unclipped some of her weapons from her belt. As she placed them down, she became more exhausted. Leave him in peace...

She wanted to chase after him, she wanted to show him what she felt like... yet she didn't. Ashla took her buckler off her back and threw it on the neat, heavy, bed. Everything that she had placed on it, even her dagger, had left the bed slumping like a bag. Ashla felt this way too. All this baggage that she had, she needed to take it off. Tobias had told her that killing was never the answer... for now Ashla would take it. Ashla had learned forgiveness a while ago, she should keep it true again.

"How are you any better thanhim?"

The words of a familiar voice haunted her head. She looked up to the window and whispered the name, "Fulgur..."

He was dead now. Ashla's cousin was gone. As was her former life, all bitten and poisoned by the snake called war until it had finally swollen and died off. The darkness in the world outside was just like that poison... and some of that poison still rested in Ashla's soul. The girl hated it, and now, she would have to let it go.

Would she let everything just vanish from her mind? Would she finally let it go? Ashla had no clue, but for now she was tired. She needed to rest.

And just then, she heard a knock on the door. Ashla grabbed her uncle's old longsword and walked towards the door. This old steel weapon was beginning to rust, the metal was dark and some of it was even rusty. Ashla had treasured it, but with the time she had had while it was in use Ashla took poor care of it. Now, Ashla had a new main weapon, but she treasured the weapon of her uncle still. Forever it would stay with her, never changing, until the day she too would die off... maybe from the poison.

Ashla shook her head once, she would not die yet. Ashla had to live! Why? Ashla had no idea. She sometimes wanted to die in her sorrows, but she carried another fond memory with her which was once her uncle's. He had told her to never give up. Ashla treasured those words as well and refused to sway from them. She would find her path ... sooner or later.

Ashla opened the door, her weapon ready to strike - this could be anyone. However, Ashla was pleasantly surprised to see that it was her companion Julius Tabor. Ashla dropped her sword and hugged the boy in front of her. Julius hugged her back a moment later, these two were inseparable.

When they broke their embrace, Ashla was smiling. Yes, for the most part she had lost everything... yet here standing in front of her was the one thing she had left. Julius had been with her since day one of her reign as duchess of Eiskalt, and he had followed her through. When Ashla had decided to step down from her roles of royal duty, Julius stepped down too. All for her. He was always there, always shielding her. And Ashla owed him her all, her love.

Ashla sighed, "J-Julius..." Her smile faded and her head fell, she had to speak herself out to him, "I ca-an't let-t g-o..."

Julius sighed softly in front of her, he must of seen what she had met. He walked further into the room, passing her, and over to where she had laid out all of her weapons. "Ashla," The brown haired teen told her, "There's a difference between letting go and living in denial."

Ashla looked over at him,sucking in every word. Her eyes narrowed as he continued to speak, "You've been living in denial."

The human/ elf hybrid looked away, "... You speak correctly." She looked back to to her to see he was leaning against the wall, his hand propped on top pf his own broadsword. He was watching her every muscle move, but not in fear... but in admiration. Ashla blushed, she knew he was madly in love with her. She sighed and leaned against the wall to the door, also watching him, "What do I do?" She whispered in a tired, exhausted whisper. Her voice was getting scratchy, she had purple circles under her eyes. Julius pushed himself off of the wall he was leaning against and walked up to her, "I know what you are going through, I went through it too..." Julius' eyes were shadowed with something. Ashla knew it must have been his memories from his time as a Fallien bandit, "I understand, but- the only way to change is to forgive not only others, but yourself."

Ashla's eyes widened, Forgive myself?? Ashla looked at him, she knew the pain in her eyes since her eyes were getting clogged up with tears. The Icebreaker blinked, "I..." This entire time, Ashla had noticed her own mistakes, her own faults. She went around blaming other to throw it off her own shoulders. She felt like a lot of things were her fault; the war in Eiskalt, Eiskalt's destruction... Up until now Ashla hadn't realized how much she had really being hurting herself through this. Was it that she was her own worst enemy? Was she the main cause of her own pain. Ashla wished not.

She shook her head, remembering the scars on her wrist. She glanced up at Julius, feeling so helpless, "...What in the world have I become??"


~~~

The rest of the night, Julius had told her to simply forget everything. Julius bought her a big meal to 'fatten her up' and then sent her to enjoy the luxurious Tobias Stalt had already gotten her. After a warm bath and dressing into a fresh, white gown, Ashla had walked to Julius' room to find him sleeping like a dead man on his bed. Ashla had chuckled, enjoying watching his slumber, before heading to her own room for the night.

The next morning would bring much troubles, Ashla was sure of it. Tobias' words and her inability to forgive more than just other hang heavy over her like the sign over the inn's door. However, Ashla knew where to start now. After she had eaten, the bartender had given her a note... in that note was the last known location of her arch enemy: Lichensith Ulroké.

Done. Submitted for judgment. I request that no GP be added but instead extra EXP for me. Tobias gets the normal thing.

[Quentin Boone]

Thread Title: Heavy Heart and Heavy Scars (http://www.althanas.com/world/showthread.php?27459-Heavy-Hearts-and-Heavy-Scars)
Judgment Type: Full Rubric
Participants: BlueGhostOfSeaside, Tobias Stalt



Plot: 13/30

Story- 5/10
The story linked well with past events, the larger current picture and alluded to the future effectively. Despite this, it fell flat of really drawing the reader in; the initial random encounter felt a little too convenient for the purpose of the tale, and throughout it seemed to carry little real importance to either character - a good story changes a character, this wasn't portrayed in the story told here.

Setting- 4/10
Setting was barely used throughout the thread, and it left the characters seeming to act mostly within a void. This was most notable in the pub, where the reader was left with little impression of what the place looked and felt like. There were little snippets of setting used, and where it was used, it was effective, but this did not counteract the general lack of 'life' to the setting.

Further points were lost due to inconsistencies between the two writers. In the opening post, BlueGhost describes the forest being cold, yet in his opener, Tobias describes a sweating heat.

Pacing- 4/10
Pacing was a weakness, especially in the first half of the thread. It was also hurt by other areas that will be mentioned below.

The first half of the thread seemed to jump around with inconsistencies. Firstly, it felt strange that an inn would be in the middle of a forest and within a few moments' walk of the place the two characters crossed paths. This caused the reader to take a moment to reimagine the setting, so broke the pace of reading. Also, Tobias entered the pub, sat down, had a small conversation with the barkeep and started drinking, yet BlueGhost describes entering behind him only a handful of seconds later, where Tobias is showing signs of inebriation and with his drink, etc.

Overall, the thread seemed a little rushed and would have benefited from more descriptions to slow it down.



Character: 15/30

Communication- 5/10
In general, the communication was good here. Lines of speech felt realistic and true to character and Tobias made good use of body language to really communicate his regret. BlueGhost's character-POV narrative style added an extra dimension of introspection that was a strength. However, it also lost points. The style gives Ashla a voice, and so the "Scrap that paragraph" comment broke the fourth wall and really broke away from character.

Overall, communication was useful and appropriate, but didn't stand out as anything out of the ordinary with the above points balanced.

Action-5/10
The thread didn't call for much action, which is fine. Tobias did a good job of using actions to convey his character, and little details really added depth. BlueGhost also didn't do anything particularly out of character with Ashla, but could have done more to add depth - for the most part, Ashla just moved and little else. Adding in small details would make all the difference.

Persona- 5/10
Tobias did a fantastic job of portraying his character's persona, and the reader really got the impression of, firstly, a man on the edge expecting an ambush at any moment, then secondly a man full of regret and despair at his own actions. As such, the character felt very real.

BlueGhost on the other hand really struggled here, from start to finish. Ashla starts off complaining and disliking her entire situation, in post one, but that same post is finished with a comment about the 'good day' not being ruined. Then, throughout the thread, her emotions are unrealistic to her actions... She furiously wants to murder him, but doesn't raise a finger against him. Then, her emotions flit back and forth with little explanation. While it's understood that Ashla is a troubled, confused teenager trying to find a new way in life, the sudden shifts in mood and emotions are without any real transition or explanation.

This can be improved by showing the transition between the emotional states, and not switching emotions quite so often. Keeping it to one emotional switch per post would have really helped. Also ensure that emotional state links realistically with other areas like action and communication; this will help them to feel much more realistic.



Prose: 15/30

Mechanics- 5/10
Both of you were generally fine here, but there were a few spelling errors and misplaced words that would have been caught with a proofread. BlueGhost struggled maintaining a past-tense and definitely overused the ellipsis. This is to show extended paused in speech or omitted words, or a trailing off of sentences to show an unspoken finish and should only be used sparingly. Many of BlueGhost's uses would have been better served with a comma, full-stop or other punctuation mark.

If either of you want specific feedback here, do not hesitate to PM me.

Clarity- 5/10
Again, most of the thread was clear, but other areas harmed this score. Setting, pacing and occasionally mechanics meant it wasn't completely clear what was happening and where and when. Generally, clarity improved as the thread progressed, but if other areas are improved upon this score will increase on its own.

Technique- 5/10
Both writers demonstrated comfort in their individual styles and techniques used were mostly subtle and didn't bog down the reading. BlueGhost's use of character-POV was a highlight in and of itself but at times fell flat, as described above. A few more metaphors from both writers would have added definite colour and life to the writing, which at times felt a little bland and like 'going through the paces.' Technique wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything special either.



Wildcard: 5/10
The story here served its purpose well, but I was disappointed by both writers - you both can do so much better!



Final Score: 48/100

BlueGhostOfSeaside (http://www.althanas.com/world/member.php?16205-BlueGhostofSeaside) receives:


901 EXP!
96 GP!


Tobias Stalt (http://www.althanas.com/world/member.php?17202-Tobias-Stalt) receives:


749 EXP!
87 GP!


Congratulations!

Due to the score this thread has earned, the request for extra EXP in exchange for GP has been denied.

[Lye]

EXP & GP Added!