View Full Version : Helping the Coalition {Solo - CLOSED}
This is a solo. Nobody should post in it.
The Concordia Forest in the early evening just before dusk was an absolutely serene sight. The trees swayed gently in the breeze, and the small woodland creatures meandered to and fro. There, of course, always existed the opportunity for ambush or worse, but the psion did not concern himself with such worries. Barring any severe mismatch in numbers he could defend himself well enough, but he still needed to stay alert.
A voice rang out above him, "Ho, who goes there?"
From about twenty feet above him stood an unknown soldier with a spearhead pointed directly at the psion's head.
"Just a traveler on my way to what was once Underwood to talk to Marshal Edward Stormcrow about some personal business."
Logan heard some rustling above him as the man disappeared from view followed by three or four whispered voices another fifteen yards away from the first. A few moments of silence followed the whispers, and the psion began to tap his foot on the ground to mark out the passage of time. One hundred and sixty two taps later, he grew far too weary of waiting and yelled up, "Ahem, I'm still down here, and if you're gone I'm just going to go on my way."
More rustling followed the psion's statement of intent, then a moment later a couple of men with bows trained upon him came into view flanking him on either side. He squeezed his eyes shut and grumbled to himself. Of course he entered into Ranger territory only to be sequestered by members of the Empire. The bastards never ceased to amaze him.
"Don't move," the man to his right shouted. Logan saw no choice but to oblige them, at least until they left him an opening.
The soldier on the left moved closer to the psion, grabbing his left wrist and wrapping a short length of hemp rope around it. He had his opening.
Logan spun around and then behind his would-be capturer. The rope tightened around the poor, unsuspecting soldier's throat as he tried to remove the rope in vain. The second solider let fly an arrow as the psion moved, but the arrow only found a place within the exposed midsection of the first soldier who slowly passed out and he released his grip on the soldier and his throat.
With his hands free, Logan reached down and unsheathed his swords in unison. The second soldier took off running away, and the psion bounded after him over fallen branches and various bits of foliage. A few moments of chase and he caught up to the lesser fit soldier, whom knocked another arrow. Logan remained unfazed and deflected the arrow before it touched him. As the soldier reached back to grab another arrow, the psion threw his sword, which flipped end over end in the air and then landed with a sickening crack and thud as the tip pierced the soldier between the eyes.
The soldier blinked twice and then went limp. The psion panted heavily for a few more moments while pulling his stuck blade from the soldier's mangled face. He didn't have questions, or need to ask anything, instead he elected to leave the man to die in agony and torment. What the Corone Empire and its elite soldiers did to the Coalition and the Corone Rangers was cause enough for such a sentence, so the psion felt no pang over the decision.
Logan slid the bit of rope into his coat pocket as he set out toward Underwood once more.
The trek through the thick inner forest of Concordia as he approached Underwood was harder than he anticipated. The sounds of the predators around him grew louder with each step, and so he slowed his walk to almost a crawl. He would push away large branches and leaves, taking a good look ahead before he continued. After a few hours of such hindered movement, he neared the resurrected outer walls of his destination, and he smiled.
Logan approached the gate, looked upward toward where he knew a Ranger guard would wait for him to show some form of identification. The psion possessed only one such item, but he knew the Rangers would immediately recognize it. The swords slid from their hilts and he crossed them above his head, the blades glinting with the moonlight trickling in through the thick overhead treetops. Without word, the gates began to open with a loud hitch followed by a clack. Grass, leaves and other assorted forest accessories shifted in front of him as the fifty-foot tall doors opened bidding him entrance.
The psion lowered his blades and re-sheathed them, before slipping through the open gates and into Underwood.
Once inside, the gates closed behind him. Logan's eyes darted around, taking in the sights and sounds of the resurrection project of what would soon be a revitalized Corone Ranger fortress. What the Corone Empire once intended as a sign of their strength and might, the Corone Rangers took hold with an intent to prove the Corone Empire's true weaknesses. The psion quite liked the idea of sticking it to the corrupt Corone rulers, and especially to the bastards who burned Underwood down in the first place.
A couple of makeshift wooden office reinforced with iron sat to his right side, and a small bunker big enough to house twenty men sat to his left. Along the far back wall men of various builds and makes worked to erect a lookout post for the rear entrance of the fort. For the time being, the gates of the rear entrance were locked and ordered to remain shut. He made his way to the offices, knowing Stormcrow would not settle into the bunker until all of his men were accounted for.
Logan rapped on the iron door, and a slit only big enough for eyes opened. A pair of green eyes peered at the psion, and he couldn't help but reply sarcastically, "Oh, so now I talk only to eyes? Is that how it is around here now, Marshal?"
The slit closed and the door opened, Marshal Stormcrow exited and embraced the psion openly. The two old friends from an age long forgotten by most Althanians hugged for a moment or two before releasing.
"Logan bloody McCloud, how are ya, ya old goon?"
Logan laughed.
"Eh, a bit better than you might expect. Been a long time since this place saw real progress, but I see you are moving along nicely. How many men you got stationed here?"
"Forty-five, give or take five or so. Twenty-five workers and the lot of my officials and guards, plus myself, too. And yes, it has been far, far too long, Master Psion."
Logan pulled a rolled up parchment from his pocket and handed it to the Marshal. Stormcrow untied and unrolled it quietly, looking over the page with focused intent.
"Inside, now," the high-ranking Corone Ranger said as his demeanor quickly changed.
Marshal Stormcrow motioned for Logan to sit down as he quietly shut the iron door and locked it. The psion took the invitation and lowered himself into the wooden chair opposite the large oak desk adorned with maps and tactical summaries before him. The entire office smelled of wine and cigars, something he knew Letho would never have allowed in his time as Marshal. The two leaders held stark contrasts to one another.
"Where did you get this," Stormcrow said as he sat down into the cushioned chair behind his desk.
Logan smirked as was his custom when he felt in control of a situation.
"Where do you think?"
The Marshal eyed the psion carefully for a couple of minutes before he slammed his fist on the desk.
"There's no way in Haide you got this directly from the Viceroy's office. You surely had some help!"
He shrugged at the Marshal's inquiry.
"The how isn't as important as the why."
Stormcrow pulled a brass key from his shirt pocket and slid it into a hidden keyhole in the back of his desk. A quick turn of the key produced a small series of clicks, a portion of the top of the desk opened with the assistance of some mysterious mechanism. The opening held a couple of minor trinkets, none of which Logan recognized upon quick glance, but he ascertained the value of each to be relatively high. The Marshal snatched the rolled up parchment and tucked it into the opening. He then turned the key once more and the compartment disappeared completely, every bit of the mechanism hiding itself completely from view.
"Can't ever be too careful these days. Especially with something as valuable as this," Marshal Stormcrow said.
Logan nodded in agreement.
"But now you got me wondering about the why, McCloud. Why did you secure it and why bring it to me?"
Logan shrugged.
"The answer to your first question is one you already know. I am not exactly a fan of the current Corone regime, and it would do me quite well to see it topple and fall."
Stormcrow leaned back, and his chair squeaked under the extra weight. He interlaced his fingers behind his head.
"You were never one to openly risk imprisonment or worse at the hands of that same regime though, so why start now?"
The psion scratched at the stubble along the line of his chin and cheek.
"I started a long time ago, really. These bastards fought dirty with good friends of mine, and I owe them a few in return."
The Marshal slapped his desk with a hearty chuckle.
"Now that, that there is the Logan I know!"
Logan gave a small chuckle of his own.
"The answer to your second question is a little less simple. You remember me from my days leading Vice, obviously, but that is in the distant, distant past. I'm trying to turn over a new leaf, and admittedly have done quite good for myself."
Stormcrow nodded, "So I've heard."
There was no surprise the Marshal knew of Logan's latest attempts to return to his days of heroics. By that point, most of Althanas knew or at least heard.
"Well, I figure I owe it to you and everyone else to settle up. I've been on your list for a while now, right?"
Marshal Stormcrow leaned over the desk toward Logan, "Still are, yes."
The psion took a deep pause and the continued, "Seems to me, Marshal, that little piece of paper is mighty valuable. I want to be freed of all debts owed to the Rangers and to you specifically, and I want to see about joining forces."
Marshal Stormcrow hesitated. With Logan indebted to both the Corone Rangers and to Stormcrow himself, the possibilities were endless. Then again, the psion had a point.
"So, we settle up and then we join up. That what you're proposing, McCloud," the Marshal tried to piece together what the psion just told him.
Logan nodded.
"The reality is you need help, and the ones I represent want to offer it. We think a partnership between our two organizations could prove quite beneficial in the grand scheme of things, so long as everything remains on the up and up."
Stormcrow sat back in his seat once more, staring at the psion intently for what felt like an eternity.
"The up and up, huh? Last I remember, the great Logan McCloud was anything but on the up and up."
He fought back the desire to lash out at the Marshal, instead he opted to take a deep calming breath.
"Like I said, new leaf."
The Marshal opened a drawer at the back of his desk and pulled out a small bottle of vintage Alerian red wine. He popped the cork and gently sniffed at the edges, then offered the psion a whiff which he gladly accepted.
"Alerian, red wine, that makes it what, a 1410 Amerone?"
Stormcrow's eyes grew wide as he was clearly impressed with the accuracy.
"You know your wines. I am duly impressed and in awe. But I must know, what do the Rangers get out of this," he asked Logan.
The psion smirked.
"You get access to some pretty impressive individuals, not to mention the artifacts we so valiantly protect and guard. You gain friendship with an organization of elite individuals capable of the stuff beyond imagination. But most importantly, you gain an ally in your war against the Corone Empire. A valuable one at that."
Marshal Stormcrow opened a second drawer and withdrew a couple of pristine wine glasses, of which Logan was completely clueless how they remained so clean considering the environment. The leader of the Corone Rangers poured a small bit from the bottle into one glass and handed it to the psion, followed by his own glass which he sipped quite delicately.
"I'm intrigued at the very least. I'm unaware of such an organization existing, but then again, that wouldn't be the first time a group managed to elude our periphery while still being quite competent and capable."
The psion sipped from his glass, the warmth of the alcohol practically melting away his strains and tensions.
"We remain hidden, nameless, just outside everyone's periphery. It is how we function so efficiently and effectively. We are in, out and gone before anyone realizes we even were."
Stormcrow set his glass down and applauded, mockingly.
"You say that, but I know you have been hanging around and traveling with a fellow who goes by the name John. He's wanted by quite a large number of houses in Salvar."
Logan shrugged, "Anyone could find that out fairly easy, but he and I still continue to travel together. That tells me while you know these things, you have no intent to concern yourself with such triviality."
The Marshal picked up his glass, took a sip and then pointed at the man opposite him.
"Indeed. We have better things to focus on right now."
The psion smiled.
"That is entirely my point, Marshal. Why bother yourself with such things when we can do it for you? You keep focused on what you need to focus on, and we keep others from bothering you and the Rangers. It seems a win-win to me."
Stormcrow gulped the last bit of the wine from his glass then licked his lips satisfied.
"Mmm. I'm beginning to see your point now, Logan. Perhaps there is room for an accord after all."
"That, of course then, brings me to my final point of business. A small favor a show of solidarity between our two sides," Logan said as he stood slowly as to not let the heavy wine push him back down into the chair.
The Marshal raised his eyebrows and motioned for Logan to continue.
"You already mentioned John so you know of his plight. Were it one of your Rangers in his situation you would do everything within your power to avenge their family and their losses."
Stormcrow nodded, "And so John did, as I've learned."
"Yeah, but that is what bugs me so much. He did what anyone would have done in the same situation. He sought out revenge, and he did what had to be done. It eats at him pretty much all the time. He has no clue I'm here, and no clue I'm doing this on his behalf, but we both know the houses of Salvar still hold a little influence from their ties to Corone. Surely you still hold a few ties there as well, and maybe you could help end their ridiculous manhunts for him?"
The Marshal laughed astonished at the high nature of the request.
"Seriously Logan? You want me to pull in favors from families tied to the noble houses of Salvar, which mind you took me close to fifty years to build a rapport with to begin with, all so your little buddy can be spared the fate he brought upon himself?"
Logan eyed the leader of the Corone Rangers sternly.
"You'll do well to remember who you're speaking to, Stormcrow."
The Marshal sat back in his chair amazed at the gall of Logan.
"You'll do well to remember who you're speaking to, Logan," Stormcrow said as he stood from his desk, hands reaching for his weapons.
The psion lifted his unarmed hands into the air.
"Look, all I'm saying is if any of us would have done the same, he shouldn't be hunted like an animal for it. If there is anything you can do to assist in removing the bounty on his head, especially in the event we need to travel to Salvar again," Logan was stopped mid-sentence by the Marshal.
"Wait, hold on. You two actually traveled to Salvar with that bounty on his head? And you're here, now?"
The psion smirked, "You don't give John and I nearly as much credit as we deserve, Stormcrow."
The Marshal remained jaw agape at the audacity of the psion and his friend. Logan had the Marshal precisely where he wanted him, and he didn't even realize it.
"Holy shit, Logan. That's nothing to sneeze at."
Logan shrugged.
"Now you know the level of talent you're working with. Trust me when I say helping remove the bounty on his head will be a major boon to your business, and ours."
Marshal Stormcrow nodded in agreement.
"Whatever you say, Logan. I'm game for it. If you two can waltz into Salvar with that bounty on his head, and leave without much of a hub-bub, well son, you damn well are someone I want on my side. And John is, too, for that matter."
The psion was pleased with himself, and with the arrangement.
"Just remember, Marshal. You take care of his bounty. We have some pretty specific purposes to be in Salvar, especially near those Dwarven mines in the mountains, and I don't need any Tom, Dick or Harry trying to collect on that bounty while we're there."
Stormcrow extended his hand, "I will call in a few favors, and if nothing else get the bounty lowered as much as I can. At the very least, while the houses might still concern themselves with John, nobody else in Salvar will bat an eye."
Logan smirked, "In return, you just call upon us whenever you need. You know how to find me."
The Marshal and the psion had come to an agreement, and effectively an accord upon which a new foundation for moving forward could be built. The Corone Rangers aiding the Tarot's purposes might prove to be quite the haul in the end, but Logan was just as pleased at getting Stormcrow's assistance in leveling the playing field for John in Salvar. In the end, Logan wanted it to be easier for John to deal with his past, and for the Hierarchy to operate in Corone when needed. Especially without the nuisance of the Corone Empire constantly on their tail.
At the very least, they had a place of refuge in Concordia in the event of another major outburst from the Empire. That very well might prove vital given the proper events at the proper times.
Philomel
09-22-15, 08:37 AM
Name of Thread: Helping the Coalition (http://www.althanas.com/world/showthread.php?29920-Helping-the-Coalition-Solo-CLOSED)
Type of Judgement: Condensed
Name of Participant: Logan
Plot: 19
The Plot in general is straight forwards, fast-paced and not confusing. It has a clear beginning (post 1), middle, (your posts 5-9) and an end (latter half of post 10). One weakness that could be said is that it takes a little too long to properly get into the story, that being to the point where Logan meets Stormcrow, and that from the other side there is something of an imbalance therefore at the other end, when the story heavily comes to a stop. There is a heavy build up of action, a singular rise and in a way this works, though definitely more of an epilogue. Setting is done very sparsely, there is mention of place-names and the design of the town of Underwood, which at least sets a scene, but other than that there is opportunity missed where further adjectives in description could have been added. On the other hand, pacing was more or less perfect for what you had here, with a good rise - although the ending was abrupt. Overall well done, but improvements can be made in more adjectives and a steadier story base.
Character: 19
Logan is a powerful character, and in his dialogue and action the reader is shown this, emanating itself through the simple and matter-of-fact writing. He has a touch of arrogance ("You'll do well to remember who you're speaking to, Stormcrow," post 9) but also this clearly can get him in trouble, ("You'll do well to remember who you're speaking to, Logan," post 9 also). His actions are defiant and have a purpose, which add to his strong will that has hidden details that defy normality; strangling another with a rope that was supposed to be binding him, and then pocketing that rope for later (post 2). These small details can often add fathoms of depth to a character, and they really start to being out some persona. That being said, you didn't use any external thought, or any clear acts of decision making, just action itself. Using this in future could help to add a deeper layer to a relatively clear character.
Writing: 18
Apart from a couple of times when the reader here had to go back on the fast-paced dialogue, clarity was well done. Everything was said that needed to be done. Similarly there were no spelling mistakes that were glaringly obvious, and the paragraphing was neat and orderly. As far as improvement goes in writing, as mentioned in Plot, you miss something of an opportunity with description. Definitely you could add a whole lot of adjectives and linguistic techniques to make your writing jump out. Overall it was simple and clear, but nothing that screamed a definite style re the writer. Try to work on this in future and it can only make things better. Please PM the Judge here for more techniques that can help you massively come into your own.
Wildcard: 5
Wildcard goes to showing the reader just what can be created in a short amount of time and with so few posts - that is, in one word; power.
Final Score: 61
Rewards:
Logan (http://www.althanas.com/world/member.php?51-Logan)receives:
3660 EXP
122 GP
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