State Lottery

[INDK]

(Closed to my LCC partner)

“My name…” the boy said patiently. “Is DAMON KAOSI!”

The innkeeper shook his head and sighed. “No, kid… it isn’t.”

Damon sighed. He found the entire conversation very rude. When the innkeeper had introduced himself as Jord Smolinsky, the boy had taken the name at face value, despite how stupid it sounded. Jord Smolinsky, all Damon could tell was that this innkeeper must have had a generally low sense of self esteem, no one else would have picked a name like that.

The innkeeper rolled his eyes. He’d had enough pretensions. Far too many people had entered the tavern and suggested they were going to win the LCC within the past few weeks for him to take anyone seriously. However, a kid trying to claim that he was a dead elven general was by far the most ridiculous thing that he had ever heard. There had been some silly rumors going around that Damon Kaosi, high elven bard and general had risen up from his cemetery in Eluriand, but there was no way that even if those sensational stories were true, there was no way that this scrap of a boy, no more than fifteen was Damon Kaosi. After all, it was common knowledge on Althanas that Damon Kaosi was green.

“Just give it a rest,” the innkeeper continued after a few minutes of absorbing Damon’s indignant silence. “No one’s going to believe you are an elven general.”

If Damon hadn’t been so confused, he might have found some kind of a reply. As far as he knew, he had never been an elven general. It was possible that he had, there was a lot he didn’t remember. In fact, he wasn’t even sure if he really was Damon Kaosi… or if being Damon Kaosi meant anything. He had just liked the name. With a sigh, he figured he’d have to come up with a new one. It was a shame though, Damon Kaosi had seemed to fit him quite well. While he couldn’t explain it, the boy was certain that Damon Kaosi had been his name at some point in his life.

“Alright…” he said. “I’m Glen Lambert then… would that be fine?” Damon bit his lip, bracing for the innkeeper’s response. Tears of frustration were beginning to well up in his eyes. It was the only other name he could think of that had sounded nice. If the innkeeper didn’t like this one either, Damon didn’t know what he was going to do.

“Alright then Glen…” the bartender said, pouring Damon the drink that the boy had requested over five minutes ago. “Was that really that hard?”

Damon, or Glen now, just sighed. It had been hard. Coming up with one name had been enough of a hassle. After all, he couldn’t just go changing his name every week. It wouldn’t work. All the people he’d met before and introduced himself to as Damon Kaosi now would certainly be confused.

In fact, Damon (or Glen) had no idea how he was supposed to introduce himself to people in the future.

[Ashiakin]

Ashiakin was chasing rumors. They had led him to this shanty of an inn near the eastern coast of Lornius that had transformed into a hub of tournament activity overnight. He was seated near the back of the establishment, running his delicate fingers along the stem of an empty wine glass while his cold eyes bored vacant holes into the table in front of him. The flowing blue silks he wore and his pristine hair and skin made him look terribly out of place amidst all the dust, grime, and beer-stained wood.

For the past several months he had been in the employ of the Salvic government as a subtle diplomat--he was not quite a spy, but not quite an official ambassador. Word that the island of Lornius was being offered as the prize of this year's Lornius Corporate Challenge had trickled through discrete channels to the autocratic offices of Knife's Edge. Rather than wait for the news to reach the Parliamentary Directorate, Salvar's crippled and corpulent legislature, the king had sent Ashiakin to Lornius to enter the tournament before any sort of a discussion could evolve. The Salvic monarchy had a great interest in the acquisition of land. Land that could be acquired bloodlessly and without suspicion was of a special interest.

It wasn't an assignment that particularly interested Ashiakin, though. His showing in the recent Serenti Invitational had been, well, embarrassing. After killing some arrogant woman named Greed, the judges had declared that his use of illicit tactics constituted a techinical victory by his opponent. He had been knocked out of the tournament after only the first round. Having entered the tournament to enhance his image, the defeat had been a painful blow to the modicum of celebrity that he possessed.

Afterwards he had traveled to Salvar and taken up his position working for the monarchy--he was tired of thinking, scheming. His pride was hurt. He just wanted to take orders and do as he was told for a while. Manipulation was such hard work. This would be a break of sorts for him.

Ashiakin lifted his head when a young man at the front of the bar proclaimed that he was Damon Kaosi. He could only smile at that. Although he had only met Kaosi once, he did recall the fellow being green. This man was as pale as he was. Word had come to him threw his web of informers that Kaosi had died from some bizarre illness or curse, although his death had not been advertised around all of Althanas as one might expect. It seemed there was still speculation on whether he lived or not. It was highly unlikely that this young man knew anything about Kaosi's whereabouts, but Ashiakin was getting desperate. He needed someone that was famous and either malleable or willing to take bribes to be his partner in the tournament.

He stood and walked toward the front of the bar. "So you're Damon Kaosi, are you?" he asked when he neared the young man. "Or perhaps I should call you Glen Lambert?" Without asking permission, he took a seat next to Kaosi and looked at him more closely. This was definitely not the Damon he remembered at all. Not only was he not green, but he didn't seem to have any of the same features he remembered the elf having. He felt like an idiot. "I don't suppose you remember meeting me then, do you?"

Ashiakin was beginning to wonder what he was doing here at all. Am I really so desperate that I'm entertaining some crazy child's fantasy? I hope no one here recognizes me. It'd be so embarrassing... Still, though. There is something about him. Stranger things have happened. We'll see.

[INDK]

Damon/Glen had not even noticed the newcomer to the tavern until the man had come and sat down beside him. Almost immediately, though, the reborn general was glad that this stranger had addressed him. Most people seemed to lack the common sense to realize two people could have the same name. This meant a lot to Damon/Glen, especially because he hadn’t meant to steal his name. Another bartender had suggested that he use it in the LCC. The boy had thought it a good suggestion at the time. Had he known all the trouble it would have caused, he would have just picked Glen Lambert. However, now that this stranger was polite enough to call him Damon Kaosi, the young boy was going to stick with the name. He resolved right then and there that this pale man was a man of high class. Not only because he was willing to let Damon keep his name, but because the boy had learned that clothes were a sign of being civilized. This stranger had a long, discolored cloak with him. To Damon, nothing could have been a greater sign of refinement.

The newborn was honored that someone this important was interested in talking to him. Though of course, had he remembered much of his previous life, it would have been very likely that he would have had a completely different reaction.

There were many things Damon didn’t remember that probably happened to him. For a moment upon birth, the young boy had known the entirety of his history, whether or not he was this Damon of mention, or if he just wasn’t another person who’d happened to have the same last name. For what he could tell, they were probably different people. The other Damon was green and a general in Raiaera, he was pale and planned on joining the LCC. From what he could imagine, a general would probably have more important things to do than participate in a tournament. Thus newborn was generally content to assume that it was another Damon who had done everything of importance, but there were a couple of memories he had possessed at his birth which he now lacked. He’d managed to salvage two words, both of which had been scribbled in the dust of a busy street. Kaosi had been one of them, a large stylized ‘B’ had been the other. Not either of them really meant anything to him at the time.

“I don’t remember you,” Damon replied earnestly, not out of coarseness but because the boy was genuinely ignorant of social grace. He thought particularly hard for a couple seconds, biting his lip in a way that was quite reminiscent of the former Raiaeran general. Damon truly wanted to remember this stranger before him, while this newcomer seemed a bit more pastel, the young boy had never met another that nearly the same. The boy smiled eagerly.

Damon’s eager smile soon faded, as he noticed that his answer had failed to please the stranger. “I may have known you before though,” Damon protested, partially if just to salvage the stranger’s feelings. “I forgot a lot of stuff that happened… do you know what this is?” The boy snatched a nearby pencil and drew the ‘B’ symbol that he remembered, hoping it would mean something to the man sitting beside him.

“If this is your name or something, then we probably are friends,” Damon concluded, hoping that now he would have said something that the pale stranger would have found to be acceptable.

Damon gulped, he really needed it to be acceptable. Without this stranger of similar skin tone, the boy was completely anchorless.

[Ashiakin]

Ashiakin studied Damon carefully. The demon was well-practiced in the art of verbal deception and it was generally easy for him to tell when someone was lying to him. Damon's words seemed like they had bee stripped from a charlatan's handbook, but his inflection was all wrong. His voice was naive and sincere... It was normal. There were no telltale facial tics, no lack of eye contact. Whoever this Damon Kaosi was, either he was telling the truth or he was a far greater trickster than Ashiakin. Somehow he doubted the latter. Perhaps it was dismissive of him, but Ashiakin was confident in his ability to read people. This man was not a liar.

The demon watched with interest as Damon drew the symbol of the Brotherhood as if it were some glyph he had found inscribed at the bottom of an ancient temple. Surely there were hundreds of flyers scattered about the city with advertisements for the guild. Even if the towers of Sanctuary had crumbled under the weight of vacancy after the successive disappearance of two of its leaders, advertisements would still live. Six months was not enough time to erase such a prominent institution from memory. It was well-known that Damon Kaosi had led the Brotherhood after Gild had vanished. If this young man was not some punk playing an idiot's practical joke, then this situation was becoming all the more curious.

Am I really this desperate? Or this crazy? Ashiakin thought. When Damon finished drawing the symbol and suggested that they might have been friends in the past, he could not help but grin. For some reason, he felt like this was leading somewhere. Perhaps it was a hunch. Maybe he was just bored. But it did seem probable that there was at least some connection to this Damon Kaosi and the one that he had known. Besides, if it turned out that this kid was lying, Ashiakin would probably be so angry that he would kill him, dump his body in the harbor and move on.

"I'm afraid that doesn't have anything to do with my name or who I am, but I do recognize it," he said helpfully. "If you've forgotten me, I suppose I should introduce myself again." He was taking a gamble with this, but he wanted to see how deep this Damon's naiveté ran. If he was really this impressionable and he was somehow, somehow connected to the elven general of the same name, this could be quite a find. "My name is Ashiakin Xan-ris Azzarak. We met in Radasanth a while back. Don't you remember?"

Ashiakin extended his immaculate pale hand for Damon to shake. "Although I suppose I could forgive you for not remembering me... I'd just hoped we'd have been able to become friends." A look of vague hurt flashed momentarily across his face, a feign at genuine sadness. "Still, it's nice to see you again, Damon. What is it that brings you to Lornius?"

He tucked several strands of long, white hair behind his ear. Am I really here? Am I really, actually doing this? If it turns out that this kid is playing me, I'll have to kill him. Too many people have seen this. After what happened in the Serenti, I can't suffer anymore embarrassment.

[INDK]

“Oh… I don’t remember anybody,” Damon replied gravely. “Nobody except this other bartender and Jord Smolinsky over there.” The boy hoped that Ashiakin would not take offense. “Those are all the people in the world I remember,” he continued. “I’ve forgotten everyone else, except that B there and my name. The Kaosi one… Glen Lambert is my backup name. I couldn’t have got this drink until I got the backup name though… that’s why I made it.” With a proud look, Damon then stared into Ashiakin’s eyes as if he expected to be congratulated. “I made up Glen Lambert myself,” he declared.

Exhaling, Damon continued to talk, almost unaware of the fact that his excited babbling was annoying most of the patrons around him. “That’s everybody I remember…” he said. “Except for this guy Todd the Rod” Damon continued. “He gave these me shiny coins for doing tricks in his circus… he said everyone was amazed because I saw things before they happened when he put me on the blindfold trapeze. I thought it was easy, but if he wants to give me coins, then that’s okay with me. What about you?”

By this point, the boy realized that he had gone too far of his topic. Without waiting for Ashiakin to answer his question, he figured he’d continue to explain himself. After all, with the man so hurt by his faltering memory, Damon doubted that Ashiakin would want to talk about the circus. “But I wish I had remembered you,” Damon continued intently. “You were probably my best friend.” He held up his pallid forearm for Ashiakin to see. “See,” he pointed out gesturing between the two skins, “it’s the same…”

Damon finally stopped for a moment, not as much because of an embarrassment over his earnest loquaciousness, but because it had left his throat parched. After downing nearly half of his cider in a swift gulp, the reincarnated general smirked. “And I’m in Lornius for the LCC,” he said, realizing that he still was not sure what the LCC was. “I had a battle in the Citadel, they didn’t let me keep it, but I should still be ready. I’ve also got clothes for my entire body except my ears, so I don’t need anything else now.”

The boy smiled, certain that his pale skinned brethren would be equally convinced that Damon would emerge from the LCC the champion. After all, he had been in a particularly tenuous battle, with a co-inhabitant who seemed insistent about not picking up his own staff and was generally ill mannered. He hoped not to have to be put in another battle when he went to the LCC.

“What about you Ashiakin?” Damon finally concluded, deciding that he had talked enough. “What brings you to Lornius?”

He smiled sweetly, figuring that by mimicking Ashiakin he would be using proper manners. “And yeah its good to meet you again,” he hurried, slightly embarrassed that he’d forgot to say it earlier.

[Ashiakin]

Ashiakin maintained a look of interest while Damon spoke. Most of what the boy said was confused nonsense, but he spoke it with such a belief and natural conviction that Ashiakin was regretting this less and less. It really seemed like the kid had some kind of connection to the elven general who shared his name and that he was as naive about the world as he could be. None of it made sense... but at the same time it did. He had yet to piece everything together, but he felt like he was getting somewhere. Either that or I'm just so desperate I'm driving myself crazy he thought wryly. Maybe I'm sitting at the front of the bar talking to an empty stool.

When Damon so casually mentioned that he was capable of seeing into the future, Ashiakin blinked. If this boy had actually been able to walk a tightrope while blindfolded with evidently no experience, then this little chat was beginning to appear very fruitful indeed. Especially since Damon was impressionable, to say the least, and he had only had to utter a few words to have him eating out of the palm of his hand. He had to be careful, though. It wouldn't do for him to say something that would scare Damon off.

Everything else the boy said only further encouraged Ashiakin. He thought that they might have been best friends in the past and he was here to enter the LCC. Aside from a few nonsensical phrases that he had been unable to decipher, Ashiakin felt like he was figuring Damon out. "Oh, we were friends, of course," he told Damon, wanting to dismissing any possible notion the boy might have of his battle with the elven general Damon Kaosi.

"Actually, I'm in Lornius for the LCC, too," he said. Ashiakin laughed at that, the comfortable, intimate laugh that one shares with an old acquaintance. Even if Damon was so unaware that he didn't understand laughter, he would be able to see other people around the common room doing the same. "Even more than our skin that we have in common, it would seem. I'm beginning to remember why we became friends." He scrounged up another helpful smile, not wanting to allow doubt any chance to work its way in.

"Damon," he said, "let me see that symbol you drew. I'd like to look at it a bit more closely, if you don't mind. I want to make sure that you're drawn what I think you've drawn. Maybe I can help you out a little."

He reached over toward the piece of paper that Damon had drawn the symbol for the Brotherhood on, but made his arm appear that it had accidently brushed against the boy's glass of cider. It teetered on the edge of the bar and looked as if it was about to fall off its edge.

"I'm sorry!" Ashiakin exclaimed. If Damon was really capable of seeing into the future--at least well enough to walk blind-folded on a tightrope--then he would surely have been able to see something as simple as this. Easy as it seemed, this little experiment would tell Ashiakin whether this boy named Damon Kaosi was for real or if he had just been playing a joke on him.

[INDK]

Damon’s hand was upon the glass even before it had completely left the desk. He grinned as he took another wide gulp that polished off the remaining liquid. Save for a few drops that had splashed onto his forearm, the rest of the cider had been saved by the boy who was blessed with future sight. “Its okay,” he said with a grin. “I could have bought another if it fell anyways, I have a whole lot of shiny things… and if I need more, I can just make those laser tornadoes again…” With a sincere look that made it seem like he was revealing an important secret to a close friend, the boy confided a bit more of his history to Ashiakin. “I got money for those at the circus too… people thought it was bright and really pretty. Todd the Rod told me if I got a sword, I could probably even be a knight with that trick… though I don’t really know why I’d want to be the part of day when the sun goes down. It’s boring then because everyone’s sleeping when I want to do something fun…”

The boy paused for a moment, unaware that his prattle had now begun to attract the attention of the rest of the tavern. After all, the boy had made some incredulous claims earlier about being Damon Kaosi, but the fact now that a relatively regal looking gentleman was paying attention to the boy’s words made other people in the tavern wonder. There was almost complete silence in the tavern, save for the conversation between Damon and Ashiakin. Even the barmaids seemed to be paying more attention to the odd child than they were to what they were doing.

Suddenly, Damon giggled. “Watch,” he whispered to Ashiakin. “Something’s going to be funny.”

Seconds later one of the barmaids, her gaze rapt on the two pale patrons, tripped over her feet only to spill the three beers on her tray straight onto the head of a gruff looking dwarf.

Damon took a secret glance at Ashiakin and then began to laugh profusely. “See,” he said, barely intelligible through his chorus of chuckles. “I TOLD YOU!”

The dwarf just looked on angrily.

[Ashiakin]

Ashiakin watched with satisfaction and restrained awe as Damon caught the glass before it fell over. While anyone with quick reflexes would have been able to perform such a trick, the glass had been situated too far away from the boy for him to have been able to grab it without foreknowledge. What Damon said after his little feat only further intrigued Ashiakin. Laser tornadoes? he wondered. If he wasn't lying about being able to see into the future, I don't see why he would lie about that... Not that he even seems capable of lying at all. The demon was feeling far less foolish.

Whoever this Damon Kaosi was, whatever connection he had to the elven general, he seemed to possess a well of unbridled power. That coupled with his extreme naiveté and his willingless to be manipulated by anyone who happened by certainly made him quite a find. Even if he wasn't the Damon Kaosi Ashiakin had known--and he didn't seem to be from what Ashiakin could recall of their meeting in the Citadel--he shared his name. Since the general was dead or gone, who would care if some vastly powerful crazy boy claimed to be him? It would lend him name recognition. It would lend them name recognition. For their team in the LCC.

Ashiakin glanced at the barmaid after Damon's direction. When she tripped and fell with her tray of drinks, he felt vindicated. The boy, whoever he was, was capable of seeing into the future. Damon was also capable of creating laser tornadoes for all Ashiakin knew. He turned to the boy and chuckled with him, seeming as friendly and sincere.

"So yeh think i's funny, do yeh?" asked the dwarf that the waitress had spilled her drinks on. Ashiakin glanced down from his stool just in time to see the dwarf draw a mythril long sword from the sheath on his back. The demon tensed suddenly, ready to move if he so needed. "I'll show yeh somethin' that I think is funny..." The dwarf wobbled forward with his oversize sword.

Ashiakin drew his own mythril long sword quickly. He was only average with a blade, but the dwarf's drunkenness meant that he posed no real threat at all. He simply swatted at the dwarf's wrist, causing him to drop the blade, then followed it up with a quick swat with the flat of his sword to the dwarf's head. Without so much of a groan, he fell back on the floor unconscious.

"Terribly sorry about that," Ashiakin said, as much to Damon as to everyone else in the bar. He didn't want to draw anymore attention than they already had. The demon hopped off his stool and picked up the fallen dwarf's long sword, extending it hilt-first towards Damon. "Take it," Ashiakin said, gesturing with the hilt that he should do so. "Consider it a gift for... oh, say, being my partner in the LCC. What do you say, friend? Will you?"

[INDK]

Until that moment, Damon didn’t know that the LCC required partners. In fact, he hadn’t managed to learn all that much about the LCC other than it was in Lornius and that he had needed to get a battle before he would have been allowed to enter. However, now it seemed that his problem of finding a partner was solved even before he knew that the problem existed. It was certainly a grand day. Not only had Damon made a new friend, but he had got himself a partner for the LCC. “It was very smart of me to come to Lornius,” Damon thought, congratulating himself. All of his problems had been solved now, he didn’t have to worry about the fact that the Ai’bron monks didn’t let him keep the battle he’d earned in the Citadel. He figured that if necessary, Ashiakin could lend him one of the battles that the white haired man had invariably earned throughout his many adventures. “I bet he’s got a whole vault of them!” Damon thought excitedly. It would only be fitting for someone dressed in so many layers of clothes.

“Yes!” Damon said, nearly snatching the sword away from Ashiakin in his excitement. “I’ll be your partner, and we’ll go and win the LCC!” While the boy had no idea what kind of skills would be necessary to win the tournament, he still spoke with the utmost confidence. Damon had taken it as a fact that both he and Ashiakin possessed the requisite skills in abundance. After all, he was certain someone like Ashiakin, who could provide shiny longswords on a moment’s notice could have picked anyone he wanted as his partner.

Damon looked around the tavern with his eyes shining brightly. Everyone else just looked on rather confused. The innkeeper, who generally responded to violence with a shotgun, was too dumbfounded to move. To Damon, however, there was only one reason why everyone else was so disappointed.

“They’re upset now, because me and Ashiakin are going to win the LCC,” he thought solemnly. “That means that no one else can.”

A bit ashamed of being so exuberant, the boy’s eyes turned grave for a few seconds. He cleared his throat and addressed the bewildered throng. “I’m sorry that Ashiakin and I am going to be winning the LCC this year so none of the rest of you will,” he said. “But its okay, next year we’ll be doing something else, so one of the rest of you can win it… I promise!”

The boy beamed at Ashiakin. “Well,” he announced. “Time to go LCCing!”

It truly had been a splendid day. The only thing that could have made it better for Damon would have been if the Ai’bron monks were to appear and confer on him his rightfully earned battle.

(I do not request the sword as a spoil. It was in my profile upon approval)

[Ashiakin]

Ashiakin smiled at Damon as he took the sword and agreed to be his partner. It was the reaction he had expected, but he was still glad that the boy seemed so exuberant. Someone with so much power who was easy to manipulate... It was almost too good to be true. If Damon really could make "laser tornadoes" and see into the future, they'd be able to plow through the list of competitors in a matter of days. Lornius would be in the hands of the Salvic monarchy so very soon. And my wretched showing at the Serenti will be entirely forgotten by the public, he thought. The people will adore me for my this victory. They'll love the new Duke of Lornius.

"Yes," he said to the boy, "we'll win. Together, Damon, I doubt that anyone will be able to stand in our way. The LCC will be ours." Ashiakin neglected to mention that the prize for victory was ownership of the island of Lornius. Salvar did not wish to share its claim to the island with anyone else, which was why the demon had been sent to find someone willing to take large bribes in the first place. But he wouldn't even need to bribe Damon. If the kid did find out that he was the rightful owner of half of Lornius, he was so simple-minded that Ashiakin could use him as a puppet ruler.

When Damon addressed the crowded common room, Ashiakin turned to face the patrons. None of them seemed quite capable of wrapping their minds around what had just happened. Ashiakin smiled theatrically and strode closer to the crowds, elegant blue silks swishing around his pale figure. "I apologize for the earlier disturbance," he announced, "but as you can see this has been a portentous day indeed. Tell your friends; tell your loved ones about what you've seen here. Damon Kaosi is back and he's joining me, Ashiakin Xan-ris Azzarak, in a partnership to take the LCC." With a small bow, he turned and walked back to the bar where Damon was sitting.

"Sorry," he said to Damon, "I just wanted to make sure they didn't feel too bad about not being able to win the LCC for themselves." He ordered a drink for himself and another cider for Damon, tipping the bartender an amount he deemed an appropriate apology for the incident with the dwarf. "I don't think they will, though. By the last rounds they'll be cheering our names." For the first time that day, his smile was not forced.

I'll need to get a letter about this to the monarchy as soon as possible... I'm sure they'll be delighted to hear that Damon Kaosi has agreed to be my partner in the LCC, he thought. Which Damon Kaosi, however, was something that the demon was going to neglect to mention.

Ashiakin, after all, always had to have tricks up his sleeve.

[Storm Veritas]

JUDGMENT TIME!

I'd like to start off by saying that I hate you both. Really. This seemed like a completely effortless thread, just a perfunctory introduction thread to give some backstory for the LCC. In the meanwhile, it is almost flawlessly written, reads easily, and just was an absolute pleasure. Although the lack of several fundamental rubric elements will hurt your score (and since the thread was so short and non-descript, I really don't see a reason to skew rubric), there is no reason to think that there's any rust on either of you.

Introduction - 7 - Solid, and hooked me in easily. Well written and thankfully simple. I did struggle for a second to figure out where you were.
Setting - 5 - I liked that you didn't overload me with mundane details about the knots on the wood in the place, or the shape of the beer glasses, but maybe a bit more setting would be helpful. At the same time, any longer thread is bound to have more setting as you have more time to develop it. I also liked how you incorporated the environment with a tripping barmaid and the cider glass.
Character - 7 - Some of this thread gave me a tingle of "Jake Lloyd baby Anakin" with Damon's being unaware of his potential and all the cool stuff he can do. My personal hatred for that bowl-cutted freakshow aside, I thought character was very well defined.
Dialogue - 9 - Loved it, on both sides. Ashiakin was terrific as the misguiding guide, and Damon was great playing the naive beast that is oblivious to his strength. Great job here.
Strategy - 7 - For a thread with so little action, you (Ashiakin) employed it perfectly in the "test", as well as the deft dousing of that little dwarf. Nicely done.
Rising Action - 3 - I think 3 is kind, since the rising action was either Ashiakin's suspense to find out it was indeed Damon, and not some imposter, or the single sentence where the dwarf drew his sword.
Climax - 2 - Again, I would consider the agreement of Damon to join as the climax, since the toppling of the dwarf was so short. And I sort of already knew that.
Conclusion - 5 - Satisfactory, although not mind-blowing.
Writing Style - 8 - A few editing issues... Ashiakin had a threw instead of "through", some grammatical tidbits, but nothing major. You both are very, VERY impressive writers, and Blank will obviously be a force in the LCC.
Wild Card - 6 - A creatively written little piece that makes the LCC more engaging.

Total Score - 59! - Just an obnoxiously high score for a thread like this. I feel guilty, and maybe a little dirty. Fortunately, I'll get over it.

SPOILS
Ashiakin gets 1220 EXP, 100 Gold from the dwarf in apology.
INDK gets 1773 EXP, 15 Gold from the bartender, for saving a glass.

(Damn, those level bonuses hook you folks up!)

[Thoracis]

I Added The Exp And Gold!!!!!!1