Hunting (open to two others)

[Hollis Brown]

(This is open to two other people if anyone wants to join. the concept is simple hunting, a way for my character to gain some exp and some hides to sell.)

The air was crisp as the sun reached over the tree tops to greet Hollis as he layer still half asleep and half awake. He had ventured out into these deep dark forests looking for work. It seemed the economy was horrid. There was little work to be found. Little work to be found was and understatement, Hollis could find no work save the occasional "Hero for hire" ads. He was no hero, no warrior. And with the serious lack of firearms of late there was little he could do in battle to defend himself. Maybe a savage head but or slash with his knife but that didn’t seem to cut it around here. The people and the beasts where in a league of their own.

alright I better get up

He groaned as he rolled over on his side. He reached down and drew out one of the smokes from his fading cigarette supply. He would be out of them soon and things would only get worse from there he thought as he drew a match and lit his cigarette. A cloud of white smoke permeated the air above his head as he rolled back into the position of which he awoke. He laid there for a time staring up into the blue sky and listening to the chirping of the birds around him.

hmm no gun, how am I gonna hunt

True Hollis could do little without his beloved firearms but damned if he wasn’t gonna hunt without one. The possibilities filled his head. He had a rather large Bowie knife that measured over a foot long. This was an idea he quickly dismissed, for in order to use that he would have to get within striking distance of whatever it was he was trying to kill. This may not have been a problem had he been after bunny rabbits but he was after something that would fetch a price.

Has he finished his cigarette a bush rustled near by. Hollis turned his head to see if his luck had run out so early in the day. Fear shot through his mind, he was not familiar with these woods. The idea of a thirteen foot brown bear bursting through the brush and mauling his face off shot through his mind. He drew the knife out off his jacket pocket and starred on in fear and anticipation.

Come out you dirty mother f*cker!

He screamed out at the bush as the rustling died down. His heart beat slowed down and his body began to relax. He chuckled to himself as he realized the wild conclusions he drew for a rustling bush. It was probly nothing more than a raccoon. Hollis regained his composure and looked around. He was still at a loss of what to do for a suitable weapon.

alright lets see what we got.

Hollis rose from the ground and was greeted with the popping and cracking of his legs. There was no doubt he was getting old, and no doubt things would only get harder. Has he stood straight he let out a yawn and strolled over to a large tree. He studied the branches and looked around its base. The thought occurred to him that he could simply sharpen a branch into a deadly spear, depending on the strength of the branch he used he could obtain a hardy reach, somewhere in the range of eleven foot or more.

that'ell work

Hollis was in the habit of talking to himself it seemed, he had done so for more years then he could count. Maybe it was a way to hold of loneliness or insanity, he didn’t know why he did it he just did.

He strolled around the base of the large tree and moved onto another, then another, and another. He was looking for a fairly long thick branch he could use. Has Hollis moved onto the next tree he was awarded with what he wanted. There lying on the ground was just what he needed. A branch the was about two inches in diameter and about ten feet long. He once again drew his knife and began to hack at one end of the branch.

Whack! Whack! Whack!

The noise filled the air all around him and seemed to echo through the trees. He continued to swing and hack until the point was satisfactory to him. He figured he had enough reach now to stay out of striking distance of any beast he came upon. Hollis stood the newly fastened spear straight up next to him, and standing a mere five foot seven the weapon towered above him. Regardless of its size the weapon wasn’t to heavy or cumbersome. He had what he needed and was on his way to find some game.

[Hollis Brown]

(anyone can join at any time but im going to continue this solo for now, feel free to jump in whenever)

swish clunk thud crack

The sounds of Hollis's rather large spear banging and scraping on the overhanging branches and leafs filled the immediate area. The weapon was proving to be rather burdensome, as it stretched into the lower tree canopy above.

Clunk

The weapon struck another branch that gave no indication that it had intentions of swaying its position to the foreign intruder. The spear became entangled with the branch and its leafs.

Snap

the stubborn branch broke into two has Hollis laid his body weight into the spear to force it through its current stuck position. Carrying the weapon at its current vertical position was proving difficult, but it was still better than the horizontal alternative which would allow for little walking ability through the patch of dense forest he had ventured into.

Has Hollis fumbled with his weapon, and his thoughts about it something caught his eye. They were tracks. The tracks appeared to be some kind of canine, they had four toes and a roughly triangular heel pad. Above the toe imprints one could see the imprints of claws. While it was possible to find cat tracks with claws, say the animal was running. Hollis was fairly certain this was a wolf of some kind and not a cat. The tracks being too small to be a foxes, and the heel pad being distinctly dog with a point at the top and not an indention.

looky there, imma gonna get me some furs

Hollis began to follow the tracks. The tracks themselves were very fresh and easy to follow. The animal hadn’t gone through any thick brush, it hadn’t climbed up any rock faces, it had just trotted along a completely traceable path, or so it was thus far. Has Hollis continued to follow the tracks something struck him as odd. Now he assumed this was a wolf he was tracking, but wolfs travel in packs and there was only one set of tracks before him. He couldn’t place a possibility for this in his mind save that maybe this wasn’t a wolf, maybe it was some other considerably large dog.

yeah that'ell be better

Hollis said allowed. The thought hadn’t come to mind earlier when he found the tracks but after realization over the fact that wolfs travel in packs, he would rather it be a different breed of animal he was tracking, he assumed if he came upon a whole pack of large dogs such as wolfs hed be done for.

He continued to track, every turn, every twist, the minutes turned to hours. He had been walking for nearly a quarter of the day now when a most welcome noise filled his ears. It was running water, it sounded like it was coming from the west or maybe the north. The exact direction the tracks were leading him.

thank god, im a might bit thirsty

He had gone several hours now without a drink. Hollis had no canteen or even a ceramic jug with him, he had been surviving off the plentiful springs and creeks in this forest, and he was long overdue for a drink.

The sound grew louder, and louder as he neared the life reviving creek. The tracks he was following took a sharp right turn, he followed them another twenty yards or so and there it was. Crystal clear fresh water bubbling over moss covered rocks.

about time

Hollis threw down his spear and crouched down next to the stream, he dunked his face into the water to drink. He slurped up mouthfuls of the ice cold mountain runoff. It might have been his considerable thirst but this was once of the best things he had ever tasted. He reared his head back after consuming a considerable amount of water.

damn thats good!

His outburst echoed through the trees around him. He was going to rest here for a bit he decided to himself has he sat back against a rock and stared at the babbling creek.

[Moonlit Raven]

Restless, Elena woke up, the need to move a physical itch under her skin. She noticed that Avery was once again gone. ‘Probably off to do his chieftain duties again,’ Elena thought with a snort. Quickly she got dressed in her leather armor and strapped on her falchion and daggers. Pausing for a moment she grabbed a short length of cloth that threatened to fall out of the chest by the wall. She used it as an impromptu pack, slinging diagonally across her back and tying it in the front. Elena tossed a couple of water skins in it, rolling them in the cloth so they would not fall.

A light touch opened the portal out of her living home. Elena stepped out and turned, watching the opening in the tree close and seal as if it had never been there. A smile tugged at her lips, as she thought about the novelty of making her home inside a living tree. A tingle alerted her to the fact that she wasn’t alone. Elena looked around before glancing up into the branches above her head. She scowled at the young man that lurked in the first set of branches.

“Come down now, Imeriel. Hiding up there is not going to do you much good. Did Avery tell you watch over me today?” Elena leaned back against the tree, waiting for the nervous young Moontae to come down.

“Oh, come on Imeriel. I’m not going to bite off you manhood despite the rumors about me.” The young man grinned sheepishly at Elena's taunt and jumped down, his draconic wings rustling a little before settling down against his back.

“Where are you going?” Imeriel asked. Elena rolled her eyes, she took Imeriel’s arm and tugged it to get him to walk with her. For a moment she walked silently, thinking that these little touches that the Moontae enjoyed were not so bad and it help her form a bond with them. ‘The bad part is they normally want more than a simple hug.’ Elena chuckled at that thought, she shook her head when Imeriel gave her a curious look.

“I’m feeling really restless today. So I am going out to hunt.” Elena held up a hand as Imeriel started to protest.

“I know. Avery doesn’t want me to go outside the City on my own. I might get lost or injured. Tell Avery this, it’s either let me go or deal with his irritated Songbird. I’ll wait for you by the fountain Imeriel.”

Elena chuckled when Imeriel flushed and took to the air heading for her husband as fast as he could. Elena slowly walked down the hard packed streets, passing the little buildings that were used for one thing or another. Stopping to greet, those that spoke to her slowed her progress even further, she found Imeriel waiting on her by the fountain.
‘At least my relationship with Avery’s people is finally improving.’ Elena thought. She sat beside Imeriel, waiting for him to talk first.

“Avery said hunting is fine. If you are not back by tomorrow night he will send the Shields to look for you.” Imeriel flushed as Elena raised a brow.

“He also said to not kill the messenger, if your not back by tomorrow night he’ll assume that your are injured.” Elena chuckled and hugged Imeriel as the tension went out of him.

“Thank you Imeriel. Good tell my husband I love him for me.” Elena wrinkled her nose at the scene she could just envision would happen. Shaking her head to rid her mind of it she waved to Imeriel and headed through the illusion barrier that hidden and separated the City from the rest of the Concordian forest. ‘Now, to fill my water skins before I start tracking down a suitably sized animal. Perhaps a deer would be nice.’ Elena thought as she studied her nails and pulled just enough of her vampiric side out to make them lengthen a little and harden.

It only took about half an hour to reach the stream, Elena paused in surprised at seeing a man drinking from the stream. Opening her senses, she frowned when she felt nothing and determined that he was human. As quietly as possible she crept closer and climbed up into a tree to watch him. She lay stretched out on a thick branch, the long braid of her night and blood colored hair lazily coiled along her back. After drinking the man showed no signs of leaving, instead he settled down to rest. Elena eyed his unusual choice for a weapon, a freshly made wooden spear, she watched him for nearly an hour.

“Good day sir. What brings you to this forest?” Elena called, just loud enough to hear easily over the bubbling of the stream, yet keeping her tone moderately friendly and non-threatening.

[Hollis Brown]

Time seemed to have left this stream alone, there was no sign of man, no sign of the marks left behind by him. No hacked down trees, no rocks rearranged in the stream by children playing. The stream itself was crisp, clean, and full of fish. Moss covered the rocks in and near the water, the only sound that filled Hollis's ears was that of running water. Yes time and man had truly left this place untouched.

Hollis watched as a lone rainbow trout fought the current. The fish was beautiful; its body being a brownish green hue with dark spots along its dorsal region, either side of the fish had a magnificent bright pink stripe running horizontally along its body. He was very familiar with the wonderful taste that came along with all the beauty but luckily for the fish Hollis did not hunger.

your lucky day fishy

Time slowly passed as he rested. Hollis was no longer a young man and thusly required significantly more time to get the gumption and energy up to continue along his way, there had been times in recent memory when he found himself simply not wanting and nearly not able to continue his journeys. It was a far cry from his younger hay days, when he was able to work a straight ten hour day with only a few twenty minute breaks throughout the day. When he was able to lift, carry, mix, cut, chop and hammer away continuously. There was no doubt in his mind that his glory days where behind him, but that wasn’t going to stop him from trying.

alright Hollis old boy lets get this show on the road already

He was only kidding himself when he spoke those words. He was still tired and didn’t even budge after this. Twenty minutes went by, then thirty, then an hour. He was feeling much better and was nearly ready to continue his hunt. Has he sat the thought still puzzled him of why there was a lone canine track, there was something up and Hollis knew it. What the severity of it was could only be so bad he thought. The tracks themselves weren’t any larger then what would be expected so Hollis held little fear in the pit of his stomach for what ever animal could have left them.

unless this thing is a three headed hound from hell, I’ll be just fine

A few more minutes passed when Hollis felt a chill run down his spine, he knew the feeling. It was the unmistakable feeling of being watched; he had it many times throughout his life but more times then not proved to be nothing. He relaxed, not more then three minutes after doing so a voice broke the serenity of the stream.

"Good day sir what brings you to this forest?"

Hollis's body jolted and stiffened, obviously startled by the voice. The voice was obviously female. It held no I’ll will, no threatening tone, no need to arm oneself, even so he was out in the woods alone and had heard stories of tragic events that could have easily been prevented with a little wariness. Hollis slowly turned his head while still remaining seated. The vision of a petite woman came into sight. She was perched on a branch, had dark hair and was white has a ghost. The obvious question came to Hollis's mind, but was not spoke "what was this meek looking woman doing out here herself.

eh? what am I doing out here? im pickin dandelions

The answer was given in an obviously sarcastic tone. Not that Hollis was annoyed with the woman, just that he was wary of what she was doing out here. For all he knew she was a bandit and had six other brothers in arms ready to rob and kill him.

now whats a pretty young thing like you doing out here all alone

He was aware of the way his question sounded and was aware that if indeed she where a bandit this might trigger the attack. Even with all that aside he was well aware of not to judge things by their cover out here. If she had any fear of her safety she wouldn’t be here, meaning that if she was alone she had the means of taking care of herself, but he still couldn’t help himself he had to say it.

[Moonlit Raven]

Elena raised a brow at the sarcasm of his first comment, the second actually pulled the corners of her mouth up in to a small smile. A small chuckle escaped her and she tilted her head and look down at the ground coverage.

“I think you picked a poor place to pick flowers, perhaps somewhere closer to the edge of the forest would be a better choice for you. Pretty young thing, eh? You wouldn’t happen to be one of those, ‘dirty old men’ now would you? I would hate for my hunting trip to be ruined. I don’t get to leave the City on my own very often, after all.”

Elena shifted to one side, letting her body roll off the branch of its own accord. She twisted nimbly in the air to land in a crouch. Straightening up, she leaning back against the tree, arms lightly crossed in front of her chest. She stared for a moment, ignoring the wind that pulled at a few loose hairs to tickle the back of her neck. Finally she nodded as if deciding something to herself.

“All jests aside I’m out here simply to hunt down something. The bigger the better, at least a large predator will put up a fight.” For a moment her warm brown eyes darkened to almost black, a fleeting blood lust passed through her eyes. Elena frowned and looked away.

Slowly she walked towards the stream, keeping the man in her peripheral vision. Nudging her falchion to a better angle, she knelt and pulled out both water skins to fill them.

“Your, spear, its freshly made. I can see the marks where you hacked away at the wood from here. What are you planning on using it for?”

[Hollis Brown]

Hollis watched the woman’s facial expressions. His first sarcastic comment received the expected response. An expression of disdain more or less. Not to any extreme that he had seen in the past. Nothing like what his sarcastic and foul mouth has given way to in his past. His second comment was a toss in the air, depending on the person it could go either way, and he had seen similar comments go both ways in extremes. To Hollis's relief the woman wasn’t offended, infact the comment gave way to a slight smile and chuckle. This immediately made Hollis take more of a liking to this person. Either reaction spoke volumes about the persons personality. If the person took offense it was obvious they were uptight higher echelon. If not it meant they where more down to earth and worth getting to know. Or at least to Hollis that’s what these things meant.

“I think you picked a poor place to pick flowers..."

The snippet of speech also told him more about the person. It was obvious that this woman was playing along. The pair both knew that the sarcastic conversation had no basis on reality and was a complete waste of time and breath, but that’s how Hollis liked things, light and not serious.

The woman then continued and asked if he was "one those, ‘dirty old men’". He smiled when he was asked the question. The smile revealed yellow nicotine stained teeth. A smile that had seen lack of care and within another handful of years would rot out.

nope can’t say I am, I just give credit where credit is due

He said while still holding his smile. The contradictory answer was purposefully orchestrated. Of course he said no. but in the manner in which the answered flowed from his lips, His words, his plastered on smile, all spoke yes. Of course Hollis had had his fair share of lust in his life he was more or less just messing with this girl, she appeared to be at least twenty years younger, and in Hollis's mind he knew nothing would happen.

The young girl then pulled of a maneuver which roared to him that there was more to her then met the eye. She rolled out of a tree twisting mid air and landing in a crouch. If Hollis had tried something even remotely similar he would have ended up with a broken rib or leg.

fancy

He said with a grin. The woman began to speak. She spoke about a hunt. She was out here to hunt? Upon first glance she didn’t even appear she could hold a weapon that would be able to kill a beast.

"The bigger the better"

Hollis's eyes lit up with mild shock with this.

the bigger the better little missy? Now I don’t mean to sound.....

He was at a loss for a word.

well I mean aint you a little petite to be hunting?

She strolled over and filled what appeared to be some type of canteens with water. Hollis was a little surprised to say the least he hadn’t expected to run into anyone out here let alone a person like this. The woman questioned Hollis's spear.

well that’s to dig up the dandelions

He said regaining his composure, and with the grin returning to his face.

seriously though, im also out huntin, that weapon there is what’s gonna bring me some hides.

Hollis points to the other side of the streams' bank.

see those? Those are tracks from some kind of dog, iv been following those and aim to continue. You can tag along if you want but I get first dibs on the hides

He knew that if this person had ever hunted in her life she would not allow the "first dibs on the hides deal" but it was worth a try. Besides there was something odd about this stalk, lone canine tracks and completely traceable. He would rather have a partner here, he was willing to negotiate but was not letting on to this.

[Moonlit Raven]

Elena found she couldn’t help the partly feral grin that spread across her features. She looked down at the water skins she was filling to hide that fact that the little bit of her vampiric side she was drawing from was having it normal side effects. She forcibly changed her grin into a closed lip smile to hide her sharpening teeth. She waited until both skins were full and placed back in the cloth before she stood up and looked at him.

“Yes, the bigger the better. Don’t be fooled by what I look like.” Elena studied the tracks he pointed out. She took a running step forward and jumped the stream, to get a better look at the tracks. ‘Why would any type of dog, wolf or other wise run by itself?’ Elena wondered as she stood up.

“Like I said I’m just out to hunt for today. I’m not after pelts, if you want them, take them. I’ll even let you have the first jab at what ever it is your hunting. I can promise an unspoiled pelt if you let me kill it. You can either take the flesh or I can take it back with me for the Moon…” Elena stopped in mid sentence and turned away slightly to readjust the sheaths that her daggers rested in.

“The longer we lurk here the farther away this dog gets, come on.” Elena flicked the braid back over her shoulder, letting it swing freely with her movements. She started following the tracks and paused for just a moment, glancing over her shoulder at him.

“By the way, just to civilized. My name is Elena Alexi –Nito, demon hunter and.” Elena grinned just enough to let light glint off of her sharp teeth.

“Demon Queen.”

[Hollis Brown]

Hollis continued to watch the woman fill her "canteens" with water, when the woman finished she told him something he already knew but even so he couldn’t help but to make his previous comments. Although he knew nothing was what it appeared to be around here his past experiences caused him to make conclusions based on appearance. After the brief comment the woman jumped the stream.

damn

He muttered inaudible under his breath. The stream wasn’t very wide but still had to measure at least four foot across. A leap that although not impossible to some, still caused a question or two to arise. He watched has she studied the tracks. Hollis wondered if she knew what she was looking at, if she knew something about animal tracks, or tracking at all in general. He was sure she did, why else would she go through the examination process. In the back of his mind though he still doubted her, he couldn’t get over the fact that she looked out of place here.

Hollis's eyes lit up when she said she wasn’t after any pelts. Why hunt if she sought no pelt? Maybe the meat? But this was a dog, not very tasty and frowned down upon for consumption. The woman went on and said that Hollis could take the first jab, and went on to promise that if she did it that the pelt would remain unspoiled. Hollis had no opposition to letting someone else kill it if he got what he was after, after all he wasn’t out here for the sport of it, he was out for financial gain, however trivial the gain might be. Hollis was well aware of low prices pelts fetched. Then she offered that he could even take the meat. She wasn’t after pelt or food, she was out here for the sheer sport of it. Then yet another thing struck him as odd, "or I can take it back with me for the Moon". She stopped mid sentence there. The moon? The moon what? He decided to leave it be.

“The longer we lurk here the farther away this dog gets, come on.”

Hollis was in no hurry, there was something different about this hunt, about this animal, maybe the animal was injured, maybe it was sick, whatever the situation was he doubted the animal was making swift ground. Assuming the animal was fine and was wondering about well aware of its situation and covering normal ground, Hollis wasn’t sure if he wanted to run into whatever it was.

The woman introduced herself as "Elena Alexi –Nito, demon hunter, and demon queen".

what the hell?

Hollis muttered inaudible under his breath once again. Demon hunter, demon queen? Again the question was thought but not spoken. Hollis wasn’t one to regularly question what he failed to understand, in time the answers might reveal themselves.

im Hollis Brown

He called back to her. He had no title to go with his name.

Hollis gathered up his spear. Again he was burdened with the clumsy weapon, and proceeded to slosh through the stream. The water was icy cold and Hollis was relieved he wouldn’t have to spend more than a minute in it. Upon reaching the other bank he proceeded to follow the tracks once more. Once more he followed the straight unwavering path the animal made. The tracks where fairly fresh maybe a day or so old. The animal probably wasn’t far, probably not more than a day and a halves walk.

Hollis turned his head to his new companion, he knew nothing about the woman and decided he would strike up a mildly pointless conversation as they walked.

so do you hunt often?

[Moonlit Raven]

“Pleasure meeting you Hollis.” Elena replied almost absently, the manners Dvalin had taught and at times beaten into her rising to the surface once more. Elena shook her head slightly, more than a little surprised to be thinking of her old mentor in any fashion. ‘I wonder what has become of him and if he still thinks of me?’ Elena wondered. She slowed her step to allow Hollis time to catch up to her.

“I am often not, ah, allowed out on my own. Normally I would have an escort with me.” Elena paused and smiled slightly at some small sarcastic thought that crossed her mind.

“If I was required to have my normal escort you would have never seen me. My, people, are very reclusive. There are laws that keep everyone from wandering as they willed. They have been in effect for so long that very few break the law, other than me. The penalties are quite harsh.” Elena frowned, as she remembered the last fight she had with Avery. She still wasn’t completely over being locked up in a cage for a day, no matter that it was a golden cage. She realized she had nearly bypassed his question and had been pretty much rambling to him, a slight flush stained her cheeks.

“Sorry about that, I guess I’m talking a lot because you are the first human I have seen in a long time. I miss human company a little, demons are okay but they sometimes don’t understand they way humans do things. I go hunting actually fairly often, normally it’s with a hunting party.

Elena caught a stalk of tall grass in her hands, her hands worrying it as she walked silently for a moment, lost in her thoughts. Batting away any stray thoughts she nodded her head slightly as if coming to a decision. Her eyes never left the unusual tracks they followed, once in a while she shaded her sensitive eyes from the patches of sunlight that managed to pierce the canopy over heard. After a moment more of debate she pulled the sharp blade out of its sheath on her left forearm and held it out towards Hollis.

“Just for your protection I’ll let you borrow this while we hunt. I do hope that afterwards I’ll get it back, someone special to me gave it and its twin to me long ago. Don’t feel reluctant to take the blade just because I’m a ‘cute young thing’ either.” Elena faded out for a moment, she slanted an amused glance at Hollis.

“I have more weapons on me than just the other dagger and my falchion. Besides, if I’m not back within a certain time, I’ll be looked for.”

[Hollis Brown]

Not allowed out? The question rang through Hollis's mind like the screeching of a train whistle. What person would not be allowed to come and go as they please in these parts of the world. This continent was clearly civil, or at least civil in the sense that a man, or a woman as this turned out to be was allowed to come and go as the please, allowed to live their life the way they deemed fit to live it regardless of what anyone else thought, allowed the basic right or necessity rather of freedom. Freedom the only thing that Hollis knew and the only thing he had, he couldn’t imagine his life to be controlled by another. Freedom was one thing, if the only thing he would fight and die for. Escort, another thing that Hollis would not stand for, to have someone breathing down your neck watching and dictating your every move.

Elena continued to say that if she had her escort Hollis would never have seen her, never even knew she existed. Are her people so reclusive, so anti-social that stopping and saying hello was not allowed? What kind of tribe was this?

well that sure ain't usual where I come from.

Indeed not, Hollis hailed from lands of free men. Lands where no man could tell another what to do.

So... why aren’t you with your escort then?

Hollis paused for a moment hesitant to ask his next question. He himself was displeased when people pried into his way of life and questioned why he did the things the way he did, but he couldn’t help himself.

Doesn’t that bother you a might bit? I mean having someone holding your hand and telling you what to do your whole life?

"you are the first human I have seen in a long time." True these lands saw very few humans, perhaps it was because as a rule of thumb humans where much weaker than the average being that prowled these lands, much slower than the creatures that dwelled within these woods, and much dumber then the mighty minds that ruled this world. Hollis doubted that many of them lived long and the lack of them could be explained this way. He himself was a pitiful match to most of this continents citizens, and he was content to mind his place on the ladder rather than die off.

yeah I guess humans are far a few between

Hollis smiled at her when he spoke this, once again revealing his less than perfect teeth. "I go hunting actually fairly often, normally it’s with a hunting party." Elena said.

welp theres two of us here aint there? thats a huntin party where I hail from

The offering of the weapon took Hollis off guard. He had his spear in hand, true the weapon was large but for the most part the wood was weak and would easily break. Second Hollis had his bowie knife in his jacket, the blade was old and dull from years of abuse, there was no telling how much life the weapon had left in it and breaking during combat would surely seal Hollis's fate.

Oh im never reluctant to take anything from a cute young thing

Hollis's smile beamed as his words implied more then were said. He was still joking with the girl and the tone in his voice implied this.

He reached out and accepted the weapon. The dagger was a work of fine craftsmanship much more balanced then his knife, and by far much sharper. This dagger had the ability to actually cut, not just hack like his bowie knife. Hollis holstered the blade in his belt. The mere fact of having an actual weapon on him provided instant comfort and the fact that this girl trusted him enough to loan the weapon also provided great comfort.

Shes a fine blade, I promise to return her to ya in the same condition after the hunt.

More weapons than the blades that where showing? This puzzled Hollis for he saw nothing else that could be used but he wasn’t going to ask the question. She would be looked for if she didn’t return in a certain amount of time. Hollis shook his head but said nothing.

The sun was now high overhead it must have been getting late in the day by now. Hollis grew tired from trekking this path, his breathing grew labored and sweat was pouring down his face. It was obvious to even a child that he was tired but Hollis continued anyway. If he didn’t the animal would gain too much ground and would be impossible to catch up to.

The tracks rounded a large cliff face, the rocks that lined it looked to have been stacked by man, but he knew this was not the case. He had seen many rock faces that looked similar to this. Rocks just thrown one on top of another to form a unstable wall. Has he came to the end of the cliff there was something disturbing that caught his eye. A deer, not a happy frolicking deer but a ravaged carcass torn asunder, limbs detached and internals hanging out onto the ground. One antler was shattered as if smashed by a hammer, the other broken in two. The carcass lay right along the tracks and one could clearly see the markings of a scuffle between whatever animal this was they where tracking and the deer.

well......

Words escaped him. He was too tired to think. Hollis wandered over to a large boulder, earth crunching under his boots and sat down. He starred at the carcass then looked over to his partner.

im gonna take a short breather here for a second, do you mind?

He didn’t care if she did or didn’t he wasn’t moving. He was too fatigued to continue at the moment. He glanced back at the carcass.

so what do ya think about that?

[Moonlit Raven]

Patiently Elena waited until he took the offered blade. She smiled at double meaning of his words and tone, now more than confident the he was a gentleman of honor. Knowing that she had spoken probably too much about Avery’s people she gave his questions some thought before answering.

“I really wanted to leave and hunt this morning, I felt the need to move. I’ll just say I won with out having to argue about leaving with the escort or, staying home. I’ve… I’ve been, ah, sequestered for only a little over a year, not my whole life.” Elena absently picked at her nails as her mind raced for ways to express her history and not speak too much about the Moontae.

“I could have left if I really wanted to but that would have meant hurting someone. I used to be, no, I still am a hunter. I’ve just been waylaid but it looks like this might be a very long vacation.” Elena smiled a bit thinking of Avery’s reaction to her wish to start hunting down demons once more. She nodded at Hollis’s thoughts that two could make a hunting party.

Elena kept an eye on her companion, checking on the older man’s fatigued stated. ‘If he keeps going and makes no complaint I won’t stop him. I should let him set the pace instead of dragging him along.’ Elena mentally shrugged and slowed her step to allow Hollis to gain a couple of paces on her and lead the way.

The trees partly gave way before a cliff, Elena looked down as the soft thumps of her boots connecting with the earth changed. Stones almost large enough to be proper stepping stone in a path littered the area. The scent of blood caught her attention just as they rounded the cliff, she spotted the corpse of the deer a moment later.

Elena spared Hollis a glance when he sat down on a nearby rock and walked up to the corpse of the deer. She knelt by the deer, the bloodied ground under her knees the farthest thing from her mind as she looked over the deer. Gently she tilted the head looking for teeth marks, the lack of any on the throat confused her. It was the easiest, and quickest way to kill. A hind leg, still partly attached caught her attention and curiosity.

Elena traced the jagged tears in the buck’s flesh and frowned. It was as if the creature they chased deliberately gave the buck a chance to fight back. The fact that most if not all of the buck was scattered around worried Elena.
As far as she could see the entire animal was here, nothing had been eaten.

Elena looked up from the grizzly spectacle in front of her to Hollis. She paused and watched him for a moment, she shook her head. She stood up and brushed her hands over her thighs, wiping of hairs and bits of congealed blood. Elena walked over to him stood by him silently for a moment.

“Come on.” She held out her hand to help him up.

“We’ll set up camp for the night. We need to find a place far enough away from the deer so predators don’t bother us and we can hunt down dinner.” I glanced back at that deer and glanced around. My gaze lingered on the cliff, especially the grass covered top, fifty feet above us. I had a bad feeling about it.

“I really think that it would be a good idea to be away from this area come dark. This, dog, that we are after is definitely not normal. It was playing with that buck, noting was eaten. Chewed on but not eaten.” Elena looked back at Hollis and shook her head.

“You start the fire and I’ll hunt down dinner.”

[Letho]

General Notes: Let me just say at the very beginning that I’m not a big fan of judging unfinished quests. All judges are readers, and when you leave the reader with just a fragment of the story, it’s like tearing the last couple of chapter of a book. And I’m pretty certain that nobody likes that. Now, I understand that sometimes the circumstances lead to unfinished stories, but I would prefer to see such either left unjudged or wrapped up by the remaining active writer. A lousy, rushed ending is better then no ending at all. Also, due to the fact that this wasn’t finished, comments in some parts of the rubric will be rather short.


CONTINUITY – 6

Hunt is a decent idea for a random, open quest, almost as common as treasure hunting. You managed to establish the reasons why your characters would be involved in such an endeavor, but it felt a bit forced. But that’s a commonality with open quests, where each character can’t perfectly fit into the story.

SETTING – 5

I have to admit that in my tenure on the staff I’ve seen the archetype forest so many times that I feel we’re all walking in the same patch of wood over and over again. There were some decent details, but with the forest it’s always a creek of fresh water and sun bursting through the canopy and little else. I haven’t been in the forest too many times, but I’ve been in enough to know that there is more then that, especially a wild forest such as Concordia. Work on the uniqueness of the setting.

PACING – 2

This is where the lack of developed plot and conclusion hurt you the most. This isn’t to say that the story itself didn’t have potential, but rather that a very small portion if it could be seen in these dozen posts. You were off to a nice slow start, but just as something interesting happened, it was over. Because of that, I can’t really give a passing number here.

DIALOGUE – 5

I have several qualms with the dialogue in this quest. My biggest one is that it didn’t feel natural. Normally, when one person speaks of something and there are more then one point of interest in their speech, the other person wouldn’t respond to every thing the first person said. Normally, people respond to the last thing they heard and then, if really necessary, they go back to what was said before. What you two did is basically took the dialogue of the other sentence for sentence and responded to it, and that kills the natural flow of dialogue. Also, Hollis, for everything that’s holy, format your spoken words different from those that are just thoughts. I could never quite say if Hollis was speaking something or just thinking. Usually, thoughts are italicized and dialogue goes in between quotation marks.

ACTION – 6

Not a lot happened so there wasn’t much action to judge here. What did happen, however, seemed in tune with your character, from Elena’s confidence to Hollis’s being a sarcastic old bastard.

PERSONA – 6

Very similar to action. There wasn’t much chance to display your characters, but when you did, you did it rather well. Though, the thing that I always find very interesting is how friendly absolute strangers are on Althanas. You’d think that people would be more wary around sharp pointy things and wild forests and untamed animals, but this hunt seemed more like a friendly stroll. You want a realistic scene of a hunt? Take a gander at the opening scene of Apocalypto.

MECHANICS – 5

Hollis, thoughts and speech is mostly done with full sentences. Yes, sometimes our mind and tongue might run in a way that isn’t perfectly in tune with proper grammar, but not all the time. Most of your speech is written like this: “hmm no gun, how am I gonna hunt”. Where is the capitalization at the beginning of the sentence? And the proper punctuation at the end of it? Spoken words and thoughts are sentences as well.

Elena, you sometimes have sentences that should either be made into two or formed differently. Here’s an example: “Elena rolled her eyes, she took Imeriel’s arm and tugged it to get him to walk with her.” That “she” is completely unnecessary. The only way it should be there is if you put a period where the comma is and start a new sentence, but that too would be unnecessary in this situation. This is a recurring problem with you. It doesn’t happen too many times, however, but it does happen.

Also, both of you: eyes out for typos. There was an abundance of them, especially in earlier posts where “you’re” turned into “your” and where verbs in past tense slipped into present and vice versa.

TECHNIQUE – 5

Nothing really out of the ordinary here.

CLARITY – 7

Sometimes the spelling mistakes forced me to back up, but not too often. You both have rather clear styles that flow nicely and are easy to read.

WILD CARD – 3

With the story left unfinished, I couldn’t go higher then this.



TOTAL SCORE – 50

Congratulations!!!


SPOILS:

Hollis Brown gets 350 EXP and 100 GP
Moonlit Raven gets 638 EXP and 100 GP


EXP/GP added!