Breathless

[Via'za]

Closed to Alvakar

Being a wandering performer wasn't actually what Via'za was anymore, but the drow woman was looking for any and all work she could get. It didn't hurt that she could sing and dance as well. The tavern she walked into was crowded and there was a small human man playing a lute on stage, the customers chatting softly and glancing up at the man every now and then. They probably weren't too excited to see a human performing but mostly everyone was too drunk to make an issue about it. The only disturbance in the entire tavern she could see was a rather loud human male, roughly halfway to death Via'za guessed from the gray in his hair.

The tavern master immediately took notice to Via'za and approached her, the man was short but not fat, in fact, he was quite muscular. He made an offer right off the bat, "Hello there, sister. May I interest you in a small job tonight? You see... these drow aren't excited by the lute-playing human and that's not good for business you see." The man spoke in fast Drow, almost too fast for the multilingual Via'za.

"Why, I don't see why they wouldn't love this human. His playing is beautiful." Via'za's snowy white hair swayed softly as the door opened up behind her, two drow men walked in and slid past the girl to sit down.

The drow tavern master chuckled at her joke, "Indeed, it is quite beautiful. My question still remains, would you like some work entertaining this audience? Just for an hour, I'll give you some nice pay, something to eat and if you like, somewhere to stay for the night."

"That sounds good," Via'za glanced upstage, it was big enough for an average dance, "how long do I have to get ready?"

"I reckon about another two or three songs before they get annoyed and I kick him off the stage, follow me in the back and I'll show you where you can prepare." The small drow man led her through a door in back of the bar counter and into a softly lit room with dozens of outfits for dancers and performers, "I'd appreciate if you could wear one of these. You don't have to, but it would be nice." The drow looked her body over and smirked. He obviously wanted to see the rest of her body as would the patrons. It was all part of the job.

A small group of drow walked into the room, all carrying instruments. There were three of them, one with a flute, one with a percussion instrument called a bulah, and the last carried a small string instrument that looked like a cross between a lute and a harp. The first drow with gray hair addressed her, "Good evening, we'll be playing music for you to dance to or sing to if you'd like. It will be rather upbeat so be ready to work hard at it." The trio walked away, leaving Via'za to get ready for her performance.

She was left with the costumes and a small curtain to change behind, there was also a small chest with a key near it to put her things in and hide the key somewhere.


~*~

Via'za came out onto the stage scantily clad. The material was light and stuck to her body surprisingly well. It was a black, silky cloth, including a skirt that extended down to the middle of the shin, which she appreciated. The top was a variation of what the humans called a halter top, heavily modified to show as much skin without being indecent. Her full back was visible, smooth and toned muscles extending down her delicate spine. The front had a single piece of material that wrapped around her neck, covered all that was necessary while exposing her stomach and it was lightly tucked into her silky belt which had enough slack to twirl and act like a ribbon when she spun. A small golden chain was in between the front of the cloth extending down from her neck, which held them in place. She wore a gold bracelet on one hand and gloves on both hands. She donned small, black dancing shoes to accommodate the rest of the outfit.

As she came out the crowd became a bit more attentive, obviously more excited about seeing a dancer than a human playing a lute for them. The small drow trio nodded to her and began to play, it was a soft, melodic introduction...


~*~

The tavern master announced that this was her last performance for the night and some of the crowd seemed disappointed, she was thankful for the announcement though, she could only dance for so long without tiring too much. The trio of drow musicians struck up a slow, deep tune. It was the tune to an old song that Via'za knew, called Breathless. She began to dance, taking a light, sliding step to the left with her right foot, spinning and eyeing the crowd. The human who was being rather loud earlier was being even louder now, yelling something she couldn't make out from the stage.

The beautiful drow on stage began to sing while taking light, exotic steps around the stage.


The daylight's fading slowly
But time with you is standing still
I'm waiting for you only
The slightest touch and I feel weak
I cannot lie
From you I cannot hide
And I'm losing will to try
Can't hide it
Can't fight it

So go on, go on, come on leave me breathless

Tease me, tease me, until I can't deny
This loving feeling
Make me long for your kiss
Go on, go on, yeah
Come on

And if there's no tomorrow
And all we have is here and now
I'm happy just to have you
You're all the love I need somehow

It’s like a dream
Although I'm not a sleep
I never want to wake up
Don't lose it
Don't leave it

I cannot lie
From you I cannot hide
And I've lost my will to try
Can't hide it
Can't fight it

Tempt me, tease me, until I can't deny
This loving feeling
Make me long for your kiss

With that, the trio made their outro and Via'za bowed elegantly to the crowd, most of them clapping. The loud human male was patting various Drow on the back and most of them looked up in contempt at the man, he was yelling loudly and shouting at Via'za, something not done in most taverns unless the Drow in it were very, very drunk.

Via'za exited the stage through the door to her right to find the tavern master waiting for her, his eyes simply amazed by her performance, "That's the best dancing and singing I've seen in a long while, here's your pay!" The small drow handed her a slip of paper and a bag with what felt like fifty or so shining coins. The paper permitted her into a free room and to get free food and drinks from the bar for two days, it was signed by the tavern master himself, "You may have just saved me tonight from a brawl over that human, I thank you with all my heart."

"Thank you," the Drow woman looked down at the man and smiled warmly at him, "I'll look forward to staying here."


~*~

She walked out from behind the bar to the cheers of the lone human male. The Drow she passed simply nodded which was enough praise for her, their recognition was appreciated. This human was drunk and noisy though, something that none of these Drow would appreciate. Via'za went to sit down at a table, she ordered a drink and the thin waitress quickly went to retrieve her beverage. In the meantime the human had decided to come and sit with her.

"Goo' jo' out there! I lov'd it!" The man's breath smelled strongly of Drow alcohol and he hiccupped fiercely, "Want t' come' wit' me to m' room?"

"I'd love to but you see, I'm rather tired and don't feel like being fooled around with. I'd like to be left alone unless you color your skin with coal, please." Via'za said in tradespeak and smirked at her own joke, thinking the man would laugh and simply go away but this one was a violent drunk she soon found out. The man grabbed her arm tightly and whispered fiercely in her ear.

"You're comin' wit' me!" He gripped tighter.

Via'za just hoped the the patrons had seen enough of this man's disruptive action and someone would help her so she wasn't forced to make a scene of it in front of everyone. She didn't want to lose the respect of the patrons.

[Alvakar]

“One night a week you come out, and you spend it sitting in silence!” hissed Bieksa, his black eyes wavering softly in the light of the table’s center candle. “How many times do I need to talk to you about this?”

Alvakar let his mug descend to the table. Drow Moonlit Ale had long lost its effect on him, but the taste washed away the stress of his work day like only Rilya could. When he wasn’t with her, the Ale was his lover. His eyes, brown as the stitches in his pants, looked at Bieksa with some concern, but they were soft.

“You can talk about it as much as you like,” replied Alvakar, and his mug was lifted to his lips once more. Like candy cane and human beer, the drink was.

They sat across from each other, and on the other two sides sat Pyatt and Luongo. Pyatt laughed to break the tension, but it didn’t work. He went silent.

“For years we’ve been coming here every last work day of the week, but it always feels the same. You know us well enough to crack a joke now and again, Alvakar. Or at least respond when I speak to you!” Bieksa’s irritating was obvious. Then again, it always was.

Were Alvakar the joking type, he’d have ignored Bieksa’s words just to make a point. Instead the Drow locked eyes. The four of them had known each other for three years now, and Alvakar acted as distant as he did on the day they met. He felt comfortable with his allies, of course, but he had no desire to join in on their talk of the various females of Ettermire.

The human’s voice chirped up again, and Alvakar groaned in response. The drunk had been silent for some time, but seemed to decide that now was as good a time as any to speak up again. Alvakar didn’t understand him, never took the time to learn any language besides those of his homeland, but he could tell the human was being obnoxious. Typical of his race, Alvakar supposed, but that was hardly an excuse.

“The Kyorl wants to rid Alerar of those, you know,” Pyatt commented. “That’s the best idea they’ve got going for them. I think it’d be a good thing.”

Alvakar looked at Pyatt as if he were a ghost. “The Kyorl would also force our children into war at fifteen. A high price to get rid of some pesky humans, don’t you think? Laziv would be dead now if he’d been put to fight, and what of your child?”

“It’d be good for him. Zamzzt lacks the discipline one gets from war,” Pyatt responded, then seemed to struggle with a thought before continuing, “Laziv too, am I wrong?”

“I don’t expect the discipline of soldier from my seventeen-year-old son. The Kyorl have foolish thoughts that would run this country into the ground.”

Alvakar’s voice occasionally took on an authoritative tone that ended conversations with anyone but his wife. This was one of those occasions. As he took another sip of his ale, Alvakar watched the new performers hit the stage and begin to play.

The dancer was beautiful, but Alvakar saw her for her talent and not her beauty; Rilya forever held his thoughts of lust. They were a cut above the lute-playing human, for reasons beyond their talent.


<(‘.’ <)

By the time the performers were finished, Luongo had left and Bieksa was drunk. He held his liquor well, but Alvakar could see the sway of his body every time he moved. Pyatt had been quiet for some time, watching the performance with a silent appreciation much like Alvakar’s own.

The tavern clapped politely at the end of the show, as everyone had enjoyed the performance. Alvakar sat with a smile on his face, but it was wiped off as the bellow of the drunken human broke the mood.

“He’ll get himself killed,” Bieksa muttered. “Shouldn’t we kick ‘im out? It’s our job, after all.”

“We’re off duty,” Pyatt responded, though Alvakar could sense the irritation in his voice. As much as they didn’t like it, it was truth. Besides, only guards in Ettermire were permitted to carry more than a small blade, and most Drow didn’t even bother with that. The human would survive.

Moments passed and the female revealed herself, changed back into her normal clothing. Alvakar only looked up when the loud cheers of the human caught his attention, especially loud in his keen ears. He was beginning to grow intolerant of the situation, and as much as he liked to keep his cool, sometimes it was good to just let out anger.

The drunken human’s greasy hand found Drow flesh. Those who witnessed it gasped aloud, but only one made a move. It wasn’t an act of heroism, but an inlaid response to an event that could not go unpunished.

The crack of crushed bone and splintered wood silenced the few Drow in the tavern that were still talking. The human’s glassy eyes cleared and he squealed in agony, trying to pull his hand away from the heavy iron ball that had pinned it to the table. Alvakar gripped the chain and pulled up the head of his morningstar, blood dripping from the spikes. The human grabbed his arm with his good hand and pulled it up, wailing and running out the door as the bloodied mess hung limply from the end of his limb. That was one hand that would never function well enough to touch another Drow.

He stood taller than the female before him, and was much more broad and square. His skin was blacker and his eyes darker, less luxurious and exotic. Alvakar’s hair was silver, however, with a shine that in the right light seemed unworldly. He didn’t look proud of himself, but had the expression on his face that said he was a man who did what needed to be done. He looked simple and strong, like a soldier should. His morningstar dangled from his hip, still bloody and rusted from a hundred or more battles. From the opposite side, his sword hung, and on his back was a round, large shield of steel.

He didn’t know what to say, what to do, so he merely nodded. She was more elegant up close, looking graceful even as she sat.

It occurred to Alvakar that the tavern was still silent, so he tore his eyes from her to look at Pyatt and Bieksa, who were staring in some kind of wild fascination. Without a word he turned and left the tavern. It was late and his family was waiting. There was nothing more for him here.

[Via'za]

The smash of the table and the human's hand made Via'za fly out of her chair, utterly shocked by the sudden explosion of sound and terror. A large morningstar had landed on his hand, the pale skinned being screamed in agony as a Drow pulled the morningstar off the crushed, limp hand. After running out the door Via'za sat there stunned by what just happened, she looked up at her savior with dark and glossy eyes in appreciation. The man had just saved her life and yet he said nothing. He did nothing, simply stood there looking back at the Drow beauty. He stared into her eyes for another moment and simply strode out the door.

After looking at some of the faces staring at her, she noticed what looked like other guards as she assumed this man was, in particular. Quickly rising from her seat, the Drow followed the man she assumed was a guard; he carried such a large weapon. Half running out the doors to the tavern, Via'za looked to the left and right, barely catching the large morningstar hanging by his side. The Drow woman turned and jogged to catch up, but lost him in the crowd.

Oh no..

Her dark skinned body weaved in and out of people, her eyes darting in anticipation of seeing the Drow that had saved her.

Nothing.

Had he really lost her that easily? She had his eyes right on him but somehow lost the man in the crowd she was all too familiar with. The Drow in the streets passed by, some glancing at Via'za, others tending to only their own business. She saw another Drow guard walking along the side of the street, perfect. She walked over to the man and tapped his shoulder.

"Hello, I'm looking for a guard that was carrying a morningstar, do you know where he went?" Her glossy, maroon eyes lit up as she asked the question.

"Oh, you mean Alvakar? I saw him go west on that road, his weapon was kind of bloody, I'd be rather careful, he's not a man of many words." The guard smiled at her, he'd probably love to have her company though. Sickening.

"Thank you." Via'za rushed off down the street the man had pointed to, leaving him to his sick fantasies. After about five minutes of walking down the same street, her rushing had paid off. There he was, clear as day. He weapon swinging on his side as he walked down the street. Via'za ran to catch up to him, hoping that he would at least saying something after she thanked him. She was about two feet away when she said his name, "Alvakar!"

[Alvakar]

Alvakar could feel the heat in his face as he rushed from the tavern, the bounce of his morningstar tugging at his hip. He hadn’t lost control of himself in years, not in such a profound, dramatic manner. Something about a human placing his hands upon a Drowess… Simply was not acceptable. As a guard for the Old Aleranian Army, he’d felt it his duty to step in.

But to crush the man’s hand? Without a skilled healer, something a seedy drunk like him surely couldn’t afford, the human would never regain usage of it. It served him right, naturally, for humans didn’t belong in Ettermire in the first place, but Alvakar was not one to ruin lives over such things.

He was anxious to get home to Rilya, who would be awake in anticipation of seeing him. Forty years of marriage was not long to those who lived for three thousand years, but all the same, it was a joyous thing that she still felt passion for him. It was because of his strength, his unyielding work ethic and pride. Something about it kept her interested.

A shadow passed over him, the shadow of the Emperea, Lord Vzailk’s airship. One of the largest and most maneuverable aircrafts in Alerar, in all of Althanas. Seeing it was a common event in Alvakar’s life, so he did not look up at it.

Alvakar spun about the corner of a tall building and was in the residential sector. Long pathways of sculpted asphalt guided him through rows of two-story, black bricked houses. His lay at the end of a side alley, but as he turned to enter he heard footsteps coming quickly from behind him. They were light and skittish, and he realized whose they were. Alvakar stopped before passing any further, turning.

Of course, his intuition was right. Who else could it have been? Alvakar found himself hoping Rilya wasn’t watching from down the road, just so he could save himself an explanation.

“Yes,” he responded. It wasn’t a question, not a yes? but a simple acknowledgement of her presence. He imagined she wanted to thank him, and realized he should have stayed long enough to let her do it earlier. “A human should not dare touch a Drow female,” he said after a second of pause, hoping it would explain, quickly, that he had no ulterior motives for doing what he did.

[Via'za]

Via'za looked at the rather emotionless face of her Drow savior, the look of a seasoned soldier. The Drowess moved in closer, only two or so feet away from the man. He was far above her in height, nearly half a foot. The Drow woman found herself suddenly at a loss of words. Wondering to herself if she should say thank you or something more ambitious. She wasn't entirely sure of his disposition, many beings who were tough as mithril on the outside were soft as butter on the inside. He didn't seem the kind though, from the way he voiced his reason for saving her from horror.

Such an emotionless response matched the face staring at her. Via'za was almost slightly disappointed that a Drow wasn't anxious to be thanked and commended for his service. Usually people liked to be acknowledged, although the one she received wasn't exactly friendly.

"I just wanted to thank you and maybe see if I could give you anything in return." The woman looked into hardened eyes with her own soft and almost innocent gaze. For the first time in her life, Via'za felt as though she owed something to someone. She wanted to repay her debt in full. She would not take no for an answer.

The performer noticed how uncomfortable her feet were on the rough stone that made up the pathway in the alley. Being between two buildings, both built with a gray stone didn't make her feel any better about waiting for a response. The smell of booze emanated from one of the two buildings slightly. They were next to a large pub, which, Via'za wasn't sure. A shadow had passed by earlier but she had ignored it.

The black skinned beauty then saw an airship out of the corner of her eye. It was quite far away now, although it wasn't an uncommon sight in Alerar, especially in Ettermire. The army and royalty always used them to get from one place to another in style. Yet she admired the technological supremacy Alerar displayed, even if she didn't understand it. Still, she waited for a reply. She shifted her feet in her impatient state and yearned for a simple, quick reply which she assumed the guard would give. His last one had been.

[Alvakar]

As quickly as Via’za stepped in, Alvakar stepped back. Just one step, to keep her at a comfortable distance from him. Something in him demanded he keep away, to avoid the smell of her, the heat of her breath. As awkward as he felt, he was steel on the outside, the perfect representation of a male who could not, would not let himself sway.

He looked into her eyes, didn’t allow himself to look at any other part of her. To do so would invite trouble, he thought. Though as hard as his gaze was, his eyes flickered when she thanked him; the idea of having a beautiful Drowess indebted to him was exciting. Just as quickly as the thoughts occurred to him, however, they were wiped away and his brown eyes were set once more.

“Your thanks is appreciated. The guard are the only people permitted to carry arms, but citizens are allowed a thin blade for protection. I encourage you to carry one, even when performing, to protect yourself from situations like that. We’re here to serve, but can’t always be around.”

It was a perfect response, he thought, impersonal enough to show her that he was not getting involved with her on a personal level, but maintaining his stance as a soldier – a guard. What he’d done was simply duty, from this standpoint. There was just one more thing to say.

“My apologies for dragging you so far, but I must get home to my family.”

He gave a half-smile, one that was obviously just for courteous’ sake, and turned to walk back down his familiar road, shield and morningstar bouncing.

[Via'za]

I didn't think about the fact he might have a family.

Via'za turned away; the man was a soldier that was definite. He knew how to talk so that even the nicest and warmest of people would sulk away from him, the Drowess did just that. The girl didn't even watch the guard walk away, she just left.

'I encourage you to carry one' what a joke.

The thought had crossed her mind as she entered the city; she was after all a beautiful creature. The idea of getting attacked by mindless drunks without any defense except her rather horrid hand-to-hand combat skills didn't seem so great. Considering what had just happened to her before Alvakar had saved her, maybe the idea of the blade wasn't such a bad one. She didn’t want a blade though; it seemed like a crude way to injure someone although a Morningstar crushing some foolish human’s hand didn’t seem much better. Either way, sulking around wouldn’t get the Drow girl any food, work would.

It was about the time to begin looking for another job. Via’za was rather sick of inns and pubs and a restaurant seemed a step up hopefully. The dark skinned elf began to wander around Ettermire from one establishment to the next looking for work. The owner of L' Jatha'la Leith was more than willing to hire the Drow woman as a waitress. All she was required to do was take down orders and know simple things about the restaurant’s daily specialties and the answers to a few basic questions. So she had started a new temporary job, waiting on the citizens and travelers of Ettermire in this fine establishment in exchange for food and shelter. So long as she kept the job, she would be fed, clothed, and have all necessities taken care of.


***

The night hadn’t been terribly busy so far, the dark skinned beauty was thankful for that. If her first night of was busy the girl wouldn’t have lasted very long. Even with the large restaurant half full she was running all over the place taking orders, bringing them to people, and bringing the dishes back. The whole place smelled of fish as it was the main course in every meal that went out at the establishment.

After the fairly easy night, Via’za was to sleep in the back office. A small bed was in there and a lock was on the door so she was safe from any would-be predators. After getting undressed from the waitress outfit the dark skinned woman lay down on the bed. Tomorrow would be good.

Normal.

Terribly sorry for the wait Matt!

[Alvakar]

The fire ate up the paper ravenously, almost hatefully, turning the yellowish piece of parchment into a pile of blackened dust in moments. It was fascinating to watch the way it crumpled and twisted up, kind of like some bugs when they’re poked. It was hot, enough to bring sweat, but Laziv didn’t care enough to notice.

What he did notice was the smell of fresh bread, the first of the signs that Dad would soon be home. The last day of the week was always the longest; Alvakar went out with his friends for a few hours, and despite his insistence that the family eat without him, they always waited. It didn’t make it any easier that Mom was making fried apple steaks, the caramel of which had long been driving the boy crazy.

He was a handsome Drow, seventeen and learning every day. If he were a human he’d have been rebellious by now, but a scholar would suggest the difference in lifespan was to blame. He was obedient and generally respectful, but recently the tug of adventure had begun to pull upon him and his peers. Laziv Kalizva was everything Rilya and Alvakar had desired in a son.

Anxious and fairly hungry, he tore his dark green eyes from the fire and went to the window, peering down the road to witness his Father walking his brisk walk. “Dad’s comin’,” he said, a grin on his face. Alvakar was his hero for a variety of reasons, though he wasn’t old enough to admit or perhaps even realize it.

He heard a mumble in response. Mom was busy cooking, after all, and wasn’t a remarkable multitasker.

Laziv went to the door and stepped onto the porch, as he often did, peering at his Father, walking with the calm, strong confidence that those around him so often could detect. Before Alvakar looked up, though, Laziv saw the blood on the ball of the morningstar. It was uncommon for his Father to return home without at least wiping the weapon, if ever there was a disturbance.

“I learned a double underhook today,” Laziv said with a grin, Alvakar approaching the thin walkway that led to the porch steps.

Alvakar looked up lifted an eyebrow as he made his way up. “Is that what they’re teaching you? Shouldn’t you be studying about now? You don’t want to be a nameless grunt like your Dad. There’s better money in airship engineering.”

“Yeah, but now if I need to fight a moon elf, I’ll take his legs out and drop ‘im quick.”

Alvakar passed Laziv, roughly rubbing the hair on the boy’s head as he stepped into his home. It was warm and comfortable, two stories of hardwood floors and vertical planked walls. Beyond the entranceway were a basin and a rack. Alvakar took in the scent of baking bread and frying meat with apples, dipped the bloodied morningstar into the basin to rinse it, and hung his equipment on the rack. Laziv followed at a distance.

“Waited for me again, did you?” he asked aloud, turning a corner to enter the kitchen and see his wife looking over the stove. As much as he told them to carry on without him on these nights, he secretly enjoyed that his family waited up. Perhaps it wasn’t so secret, considering that they always waited.

Rilya turned and looked at him, a gentle smile on her face. He returned it and went to her, kissing her just above the right eye. She was greyer than him, her ears pointing upward, and her eyes were bright emerald. Considerably smaller than him, she could bury herself in his arms, and often did.

“Always,” she said, her eyes looking past him for a moment to Laziv. “Laziv, set the table.”

*****
** **
*****

Dinner was, as was typical, social and delicious. Alvakar talked more with his family in one night than he did to his friends in an entire week. They discussed nothing unusual until their food was done with, and they were simply sitting at the table with drinks. Laziv, who had been close to silent during the meal, suddenly sprung to life and leaned into the table.

“Who made a ruckus today, Dad? You didn’t say anythin’ about it… I bet it was some Kyorl group, yeah? Trying to smash up the Old Alerian army outposts or something?”

Alvakar looked from his son to his wife and back. “What in the world are you talking about, kiddo?”

“Spikey was covered in blood,” Laziv said, as if he couldn’t believe Alvakar didn’t know what was going on. Rilya looked over in frustration at her son. He’d called the morningstar that ever since he’d been a child; Rilya always thought it was silly, especially at seventeen, to name a weapon.

“Oh, well, there was a disturbance at the bar. A human was having too good a time, he put his hands on a Drow and needed to be dealt with. He’s alive, his hand is just damaged. I don’t expect to hear about it from Vanff, it’s what I’m paid to do, after all.”

Rilya and Laziv both knew it was hard to simply damage an appendage with the destructive morningstar, but neither commented on it. Rilya had a playful gleam in her eye, though, and Alvakar saw it. “A female, dear? Do you have yourself a crush?” She grinned wide. “What’s her name?”

Alvakar rolled his eyes and rose, taking his cup into the kitchen. He was exhausted and wanted sleep. Laziv was chuckling, knowing that Alvakar’s embarrassment, though well hidden, was intense.

Before he could get to the stairs, though, Rilya’s laughing voice called. “Is she cute!?”

[Via'za]

It was the middle of the night when Via'za awoke from her dream. The war had her thoughts stirred and the thought of it coming to her home didn't seem appealing, her thoughts were fleeting though and often drifted one to the next. The human who harassed her and Alvakar, her savior. She couldn't stop wanting to thank Alvakar and sit down for a chat. As the girl thought about it more, she wanted to see him, if even just once more. Whether there was a debt owed or not, Via'za didn't care. She wanted to return the favor in any way possible. Thinking about it now wouldn't change anything now, the important thing was to never take a job anywhere that a drunk human was at. That would be foolish.

The girl went back to sleep. Work would come early in the morning.


~*~

The Alerar sun peeked into the office window onto the Drowess's face, making her stir slightly on the mat that was her bed. The door swung open lightly, her newest boss walked into the office.

"Did you sleep well Via'za?" The man was tall, commanding. His voice was soothing though, it appealed to someone who was trying to wake themselves.

"Most of the night, thank you. Do I need to get up right away?" Via'za sat up, scooting back so she could lean against the wall.

"It'd be a great help if you did. You have about another hour before you need to though. Extra pay if you work sooner, obviously." The man was busy gathering papers and began walking out the door.

"All right, I'll get up and go out there then, is it usually busy this time of day?" The Drow girl rose to her feet and tossed her blanket to the side.

"Nope." The man's voice could hardly be heard as he hurried off to go about his business. The man was nice, that was for sure, and extra pay sounded good so the girl decided to get dressed for the day at work and get out there and take orders.


~*~

It was the beginning of the evening and Via'za was now done with her shift, it was time to go out and have fun her boss told her. So she would go do that, then. After getting changed quickly in the back room she waved to her new co-workers and went out the door to find a pub.

Tonight would be fun, then she would rinse and repeat for the next day.

((Running short on time, I have to go outside and rake more leaves, this works though. Her day was as boring as this post. :)))

[Alvakar]

Ettermire’s night was black and calm. Burning coal had cooled once more, smokestacks were clear and the night shifts were over. The only sounds were the footsteps of a guard as he walked on by, piercing red eyes seeing through the darkness to peer for lurkers.

Laziv slept soundly in his room, a second-floor chamber that provided him comfort and warmth, though little entertainment beyond his hook blades. Moonlight crept carefully through the cracks in his blinds, shedding horizontal lines of light across his face. His chin was becoming more defined this year, and his childish cheeks were shrinking day by day.

Alvakar lay on his back, naked under the rose sheets of the couples’ bed – Rilya’s choice of color, not his – broad chest rising and falling softly as he rested. His wife lay awake by his side, head on his shoulder and eyes barely open, admiring softly the visage of her love. Her fingers gently, absently ran along his chest and stomach.

“Laziv is coping well?” he asked, keeping his eyes closed.

“Mm-hm,” Rilya replied softly. “He misses his father, though. How much longer until the late nights end?”

Now his eyes opened, and he looked into hers. “I’ll stop heading out to the bar,” he began. Rilya tried to interrupt him but he wouldn’t have it. “Darling, I don’t enjoy it anyhow. Pyatt, Bieksa and Luongo are good soldiers and Drow I am happy to have watching my back, but I’ve no need for them as friends. With the Kyorl and The Resistance growing more and more bold, the hours have grown long. When the day is done, my focus should be on you, my love, and our son. So from this moment forward, it will be.”

Her smile was narrow, satisfied. Rilya’s hand climbed to Alvakar’s face and stroked it for a moment. His arm, around her head and running down her arched back, scratched affectionately at her skin.

“Don’t you ever get lonely?” she asked. “I guess not, you aren’t like me. If I didn’t know so many of the people who come into the Bakery, I’d go crazy.”

“I think of our family, our future and our land. It’s not so difficult to be focused, knowing that I play a role that serves to protect those three things.”

“Mm,” she responded once more, closing her eyes. Her hand came to a rest, open on Alvakar’s dark shoulder. “Sleep now, my love.” He did.

====== <(‘.’ <) ======

Morning and afternoon passed quickly for Alvakar, who had moved through the day like a machine. This day had him doing perimeter walks about the engineering and production districts, dull, gray areas with dull, gray buildings with not a single tree or citizen to observe. All the same, they were areas that meant much to Ettermire’s productivity, and he was one of many who needed to make sure there was no suspicious activity.

He’d explained to Rilya the previous night that his focus helped him do his job, and today was no different. His eyes and ears were sharp, but his mind was on his wife and child. Laziv, especially, was at the forefront of his mind. How would the child fare in this new world? What if the Kyorl decided to take more chances? The boy would surely suffer, and the realization made Alvakar worry.

But a new thought process had begun to creep around the edges of his mind, the curiosity toward a particular Drow female he’d met the night before. He didn’t know her name, just her face, but it was enough to make him wonder. His attraction to her made him feel guilty, but he knew that as long as he didn’t behave in a specific way, he was being faithful to his family.

Still, the idea of another female in his thoughts, another Drowess but Rilya, made him uneasy. But then, something else snatched his focus.

Cries from the West rose up, along with the clang of metal on metal. With as much speed as his broad frame could muster, Alvakar took his shield and morningstar in hand and sprinted toward the sounds. The rush took him beyond the industrial sector and into business, where he saw two groups of Drow squared off against one another, not far from Rilya’s favorite restaurant and a small pub.

“The High Graf has told you the cause of the Queen’s death, it was Raiaeran spies!” cried a Drow who clutched a long pike. From this distance, Alvakar could see that it was Bieksa. “If the Old Aleranian Army had the unity then that it does now, it would have never happened!”

Across from Bieksa and the four guards who stood by his side, each of them armed and emblazoned with emblems of the Old Aleranian Army, stood six Drow with shields of Mythril. Kyorl.

“The assassination was a blessing,” hissed one of the opposing Drow, turning to eye the approaching, running Alvakar. “It freed us from the rule of a witch!”

“So perhaps it wasn’t Raiaerans at all,” snarled one of Bieksa’s accomplices. Alvakar didn’t recognize any of them as he reached the group, standing on Bieksa’s side of the standoff.

“What are you suggesting, Army scum?” the opposing Drow countered.

“Wait!” Alvakar demanded, his voice deep and commanding. “This isn’t the place for a fight. With the Rangir and The Resistance constantly making a fuss in this end of Ettermire, we’re asking for trouble by stirring up trouble. Let’s part ways and all live to see our homes again.”

But it was too late, the offended team of Kyorl were already drawing their weapons. A sword, a dagger, a mace, another two swords and a warhammer, wielded by a Drow who wore a buckler tightened on his forearm. With Alvakar by their side, the Old Aleranian force had the same amount of fighters.

“Insult the Kyorl, will you?”

In unison, the Kyorl group rushed forward to strike.

[Mathias]

Quest Judgement
Breathless

Alright. As per the request, I will only critique Alvakar's writing, due Via'za departing. First off, I'll comment, for reference anywhere, on the reference of the song, "Breathless," by The Corrs. If you don't credit, somewhere within the post, or even the thread, who wrote or said or sang or did whatevery ou quoted, then it will be seen as plagiarism. Therefore, Breathless is not an "old, Drow song." It is a contemporary composition by a contemporary rock band from Earth. I don't like the idea of crossing wires, there, especially if the character in question hasn't had any interaction with earthlings. That greivance aside, I'll say that it is disappointing this thread was cut short, because it had much potential.

STORY 14

Continuity ~ 5/10 I really don't have a whole lot to say; I'm not particularly keen on Raiarean and Alerian history and such, but I know as much that gives me an understanding as to what was going on, why it was going on. It just felt lacking, in that, I didn't get tugged into the lore of the world itself. See Setting for further comments on this.

Setting ~ 6/10 I would've liked to feel some description of Ettermire itself. Describing more than just a tavern and the dull gray building and such. I could envision it something decent, but I just didn't feel it out. There wasn't a living, breathing world around the characters. There wasn't even really a stale world around them. Try starting in a "cold opening," describing the city, the events, and slowly melt them together until it finally centralizes on the character.

Pacing ~ 3/10 This would've been better, I'm entirely sure, had the thread lead somewhere. As such, though, the characters met, departed, and started existing on two seperate storylines; almost like reading two different soloquests at once. Perhaps they were going to meet up again later, perhaps not. I guess I'll never know. But it didn't lead anywhere, anyway, so that hurts this score.

CHARACTER 18

Dialogue ~ 8/10 I like the dichotomy of Alvakar and Rilya, and I, for some inescapable reason, like Alvakar as a character. It seems almost foreign to me to... "anchor," a character with a family, especially given the youth that he retains as a Drow, and as a character. It's one of those things that doesn't arise in Fantasy all too often, and certainly even less so on Althanas. For this, and pulling it off well, you got some cookies.

Although, I will make one note; It may be a pet peeve of mine, but Elves, as a general race, seem too... sophisticated, for lack of a more accurate term, to use the term "Dad." It just seems like it would be foreign to them. I didn't really dock you here, I just thought I'd make a note that the formality would seem more appropriate for a Drow family, whereas Dad seems more "Human-ish."

Action ~ 3/10 There isn't a whole lot of action to speak of. Although, granted, I understand that it is apparent that it was impossible to have reached the "meat," of the story where the actual action was.

Persona ~ 7/10 I wanted to give you one point more, but I will tell you where it got lost; The crack in Alvakar's resolution. Considering that I previously lauded the "anchor," that is his family, I disliked the temptation that Via'za presented to him. I can't quite explain it in definitive terms, so I use this example; Why can't a fanatical zealot in the employ of some theocracy stay a fanatical, mindless zealot? Sure, it's not a terribly diverse or expressable personality, but it doesn't change the fact that it's fun. If it makes the character enjoyable, why do you NEED some attempt at characterizing and humanizing, and all that jazz. If it isn't broke, don't fix it.

WRITING STYLE 19

Technique ~ 6/10 I wasn't awed by anything in particular, but at the same time I wasn't underwhelmed. It was a solid thread that progressed at a solid pace with solid writing. It could've been so much more, though, with equal enthusiasm and perseverance.

Mechanics ~ 7/10 I didn't see any concerning or glaring mistakes, nor any grammatical errors. I'd like to see you using more poeticism, if I may invent a word, there, for a moment. Something that caught my eye was the repitition in this line of your last post,

"This day had him doing perimeter walks about the engineering and production districts, dull, gray areas with dull, gray buildings,"

I would've liked to see more, short, contained bouts of flourish; repitition and alliteration alike, riddled throughout your posts. Sometimes, even when you're not writing poetry, and you suddenly string several alliterative words together, you start to create a rhythm for the reader. I know when I realize I accidently do that, I sometimes wonder if it'll go unnoticed, or if it'll be a happy accident for someone else.

Clarity ~ 6/10 There wasn't any toying with my perception, nor anything particularly complicated about the thread, the story, and the presentation of it. At the same time, there wasn't anything that I didn't understand, or had to reread.

MISCELLANEOUS

Wild Card ~ 3/10 All in all, I felt this would've been a great thread, had Via'za not stopped posting, and the storyline would've culminated in whatever way it was heading. It sucks, especially, since whatever would've happened didn't, and as the reader, I'm only left to fulfill that blank in my head. Had there been more to the thread itself, then it may have negated a few of the points docked for the irritations or peeves that I had, atleast in the beginning itself.

TOTAL ~ 54/100

EXP Rewards
Alvakar receives 400 Exp!
Via'za receives 350 Exp!

GP Rewards
Alvakar receives 100 Gold!
Via'za receives 60 Gold!

Other Rewards
Alvakar receives a rose that has its petals colored two different ways: One half is a vibrant red and the other is a purple-tinted ebony. It could represent the conflict of his temptation, and his duty to be faithful to his wife. Or, it might represent the dichotomy between himself and Rilya. Or, it might just be a plain, pretty little flower. Who knows?
(Cannot be sold at the bazaar, has no magical abilities that can be detected)

[Karuka]

EXP/GP added!