Seeking change

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

((Closed)) ( bunnying pre-approved with all parties)

I wondered why I subjected myself to situations I knew disagreed with me. A couple of feet below my face the grayish blue color of the deep ocean rolled past, sweeping away the grey greasy streak that had been my lunch. I bit back a groan and settled on grumbling under my breath. All too aware that if my words where heard I would most likely be thought insane. A feral grin tugged at my lips, skinning them back from white teeth. Insane, I think I must have lost my marbles long before I ever got to Althanas.

My nausea gone for the moment, I began laughing under my breath. I knew that all too soon, like a stalker, it would return and when it did I would once again take my place at the ships rails. Turning to cross the deck and hide in my quarters for a bit the boat crested a high wave. I lost my footing as the deck pitched steeply and fell heavily to the deck. Clawing at the wood, I slid for perhaps six inches before being stop as someone grabbing my arm. An older deck hand with lecherous eyes helped me to my feet and began dusting me off, his hands rested on and stroked my clothing in a manner that was more than just helpful.

“Remove your hand, or I’ll personally see your manhood thrown to the sharks.” The hand resting against my backside promptly disappeared, the man glared at me. I stared back at him with all the emotion of a blank wall and after a few seconds a slight sneer formed as I envisioned actually carrying out my threat. A few modifications were involved though. Muttering under his breath about women needing to learn their place and cold women he threw me a dirty look as he returned to his station. Huffing quietly and heading for my cabin below deck. I wondered how any salty sea dog such as that man would ever find a woman willing to bed him. Honestly, I was slightly disappointed in the fact that the man had given up so easily. I had been looking forward a little to a confrontation.

In the narrow cramped hall two sailors hurried passed me, talking hurriedly and quietly. I caught something about the cargo hold but nothing else. In the poorly lit hall I winced as the door shrieked bloody murder when pushed to open.

“Someone seriously needs to come up with metal lube in this world. WD40 or what ever it is called.” I muttered as I looked into the room. It was surprisingly big for a passenger’s room. Well, perhaps not. The Captain had given me his room, as I was the only female currently on board. My now very dusty and faded backpack sat in one corner; the shirt I had worn when I arrived on Althanas tossed on the ground beside it.

Sighing quietly I dug through the pack until I found the hairbrush. Tugging the ponytail holder out of my hair harshly I started on the tangles in my hair. Working at the tangled mass I had once taken pride in I absently began humming. I wasn’t until I whispered the words ‘turned to gold’ that I realized I was humming Blue Moon. My vision misted over immediately at the reminder that I had in all reasoning lost my husband. Angrily I sniffed and wiped at my eyes.

No use in crying over spilled milk. I winced at the spike of pain the lance across my scalp when I pulled the hairbrush too viciously through the last tangle. Throwing the hairbrush at the bag I got up and paced the cabin, letting my thoughts spin around one another. I wondered what had happened to the stories I had been working on when I was pulled into Althanas.

“Stories…” I whispered, frozen in place by an unusual idea. If my adventures where being recorded in the real world as stories then I could in theory communicate one way with Jason. I smiled, thrilled that in some way I could talk to Jason.

“Oi! If you’re watching, no cheating. You have to follow the rules, hon. Your guys have to be themselves, got it? You can’t change who they are or god mode them.” I wondered when or if I would ever meet any of the odd and downright insane characters of Jason’s that I had read. After all Althanas was a big world. Or was it?

[Twisted Infinitum]

“Why don’t Limey just check the cargo himself if he ‘eard it shiftin’?” said one of the sailors who had just passed the young woman in the hall.

“The Cap’n wants him on sails. He used the word ‘now’, so Limey was running,” replied the other with a chuckle.

“Arg… we’ll get worse words than ‘now’ if any o’ that fancy stuff breaks.”

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

“Words like ‘you’re all swimming back to the mainland to get more’, eh?”

“Aye. I remember ‘im doin’ that before.”

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

“Saying it, or actually making someone do it?” the jovial one asked with a hint of concern.

“You ‘ear that?” the sailor of heavy sea accent asked, ignoring the other’s question, as they stopped at the door to the cargo hold. “Soundin’ like somethin’s on a roll!” With each lurch of the ship, the crashing could be heard loudly through the door.

thump-thump-thump-thump-THUMP
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

“I… don’t want to look.” The thumping came again, this time it ended loudly right against the other side of the door.

“Brave face, laddie,” said the seadog as he pushed his companion forward.

With only a moment of hesitation, the sailor undid the latch and let the door fall open. The source of the thumping spilled out at their feet, nothing but an oversized black sac. The relieved sailor at the door laughed and gave it a nudge with his foot. “Doesn’t look like anything too expens-“

There was a lot more resistance than he expected from it as it creaked over on its other side, revealing that it was actually a man in a robe. ‘Man’ wasn’t the correct term, though. Half of the face was wooden, like a life-sized mannequin. The other was only human if you ignored the lack of skin and the gooey, transparent flesh with brightly colored innards within.

“By the Gods o’ the Sea,” spat one sailor while the other clapped both hands over his mouth to keep his own innards from becoming visible.

Say hello to the nice seamen, my little cargo fairy! cooed the sweet voice that only this creature could hear.

With a heavy click the jaw opened and attempted to speak. “Hello. I’m cargo fairy,” it drawled in a tone fitting a zombie more than a fairy. The sailors could think of far better names for it.

“Bloomin’ ghost!” shouted one.

“Demon! Demon!” screamed the other as they fell over each other in a wild stampede down the hall.

Hmph. People who live on ships have no manners, right Edgar?

The construct sat up and nodded with a muffled “Mm-hmm”. If there was one thing his below-infantile mind understood, it was that agreeing with his creator was a good thing.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Shouting just muffled enough to make the words unclear as well as the sound of running drew my attention. Unable to resist the lure of my curiosity anymore than a flower could resist turning to face the warmth of the sun, I slowly crossed the room to check on what was happening. If the ship is going down I so don’t want to be the last to know about it. The door fought with me as if it didn’t want to open and let me see what was going on out in the hall. Finally with an angry squeal it opened, slamming into the wall. I grimaced then shrugged. I won’t be held liable for damage done to the wall when they don’t take proper care of the hinges as it is.

“Oh well, the wall is made of wood. It’s not like I’ll break it.” Cautiously I stuck my head out and looked both ways. The two sailors that had passed me earlier disappeared around the corner, running towards the stairs, just as spotted them. Perplexed, I looked back the other way. I slowly walked down the way the sailors had come from, muttering to myself the whole time.

“I am so going to get myself killed someday. This sucks, if I die before I find that stupid little mage or shaman or whatever he is I’m going to be so ticked off.” I stopped, snorting derisively at the idea of being mad because something killed me. “At least becoming a ghost would make it easier to travel around. Still, that would completely bite.”

A dozen or so feet ahead of me the door to what I assumed was the cargo hold loomed open. The cargo hold itself was black, unlit from within. At the base of the open door a black cloaked figure sat, oddly stiff.

“Okay, what in the hell is going on?’” I muttered to myself watching the figure sitting there form a safe distance. Safe being several body lengths away incase it decided to try and move. After several minutes, I grew a little braver. Slowly I crept forward in a lizard like manner, a single step then a pause to watch the figure for movement, until I was just behind the seated figure. Ready to shriek like a girl and run in case the figure proved to be harmful, I lightly prodded the shoulders. The fact that one side felt hard as stone and the other side gave under pressure in an unpleasant manor just plain creeped me out.

“What am I doing? I should follow those sailors heroic display of courage and return to my room.” Knowing that until my curiosity was satisfied I wouldn’t be going anywhere I sighed and carefully leaned forward. Just as I began to see little more than black shadow under the hood, the captain and several sailors showed up.

“Miss, come away from there! My men say it’s a horrid monster.” I rolled my eyes at the captain’s melodramatic manner and gave the two sailors I recognized a skeptical look.

“Riiiiiight. The men that I saw running the opposite way and leaving me, a helpless woman, down here with this monster? Anywho, I’ve been watching it for a few minutes and he, it, whatever hasn’t moved at all. I don’t see the danger here.” I turned and leaned forward around the figure, holding the doorframe so I wouldn’t lose my balance and fall into the figure’s lap.

I wasn’t sure if it was the shadows or my eyes playing tricks on me but it seemed as if two things were in the cloak, or perhaps half of two things. Confused I looked up at the Captain. The silly man ushered me back towards him. I gave him a look plainly telling him my idea on that subject. Sighing and growing tired of trying to figure out what was under the cloak as well as ignoring the Captain’s increasingly firm movements indicating that I should join him in safety, I grabbed the hood and yanked it back.

For a long moment I stared at the head of the odd creation I had unveiled. One half of the head consisted of a lightwood, several nicks and scratches marred the surface. The other half was a clear cloudy gelatin; I could see the outline of the skull and even a hint of the brain. A glowing orange orb, near the size of an orange stared out at me. I stared back, at a lost for words. After a moment something clicked in my brain, a light bulb turned on and I began laughing.

“Hi Edgar.” I struggled to talk through the fit of giggles that had over taken me.

“What are you doing on this ship?”

[Twisted Infinitum]

The conversation took a moment to dawn on Edgar’s creator. Most things do.

Number counting lesson time! She squealed as she pirouetted around his other half, the remnants that had been left for her to control him through. In her home, the Dream World, a place where thought took the place of all matter and laws, his other half floated like a dejected Siamese twin. It was a naked quivering mess of spiritual gelatin and rainbow innards, twisted into an unwilling frame around a shiny red bubble. All around was the multicolored void of thought. Exotic, beautiful, and empty, save for one being. Onyx Calico, the dream demon that embodied schizophrenia, paranoia, obnoxious laughter at ones own jokes, and all manner of insanity.

With a huge grin cracking her feline face, she stopped spinning and took a commanding, teacherly pose, though it was difficult to take seriously with her clothing more reminiscent of a trendsetting schoolgirl. You’d have to look hard, but somewhere in the infinite reiterations of the universe, short shorts and fishnet shawls were all the rage at one time.

First question, class. How many times did little Edgar roll across the cargo hold? Don’t count the bumping over crates, or when he got his head stuck in the barrel of oranges. By the way, next class is chemistry, and we’ll be analyzing the affect of citrus on Hanchulan goo. Our experiments will show what would have happened to the pretty side of his face if he hadn’t tipped himself out of there.

Edgar seemed to be paying attention. His mind certainly wasn’t wandering, but it would have to learn to walk before it could wander. Moments passed in which he didn’t give an answer to the question that was almost lost in ramblings to an imaginary student body. Calico opened her mouth to ask again when she was distracted.

Someone had pulled the hood off of Edgar’s pretty little head, causing him to look up and behind. As he did so, the image that Calico saw in the Hanchulan-wrapped bubble changed from a darkened storage room to a human girl’s face. She seemed happy, even delighted to see Edgar, which was quite worthy of notice.

Calico froze, dumbfounded, until she came up with an explanation that satisfied her. Oh, my little Edgar’s growing up. He’s got himself a girlfriend and I didn’t even know about her. Sneaky sneaky little boy. Well, say howdy to her and give her rump a squeeze.

Edgar stood like a creaky tower of reeds, then turned to look at his visitor. “Howdy, girlfriend,” he mimicked with just a hint of the intonation Calico lay thickly on the word. He paused for a moment, contemplating the definition of “rump”. Finally, with a sudden twitch of his mannequin arm, he held forth an orange that his hand had locked onto in the frantic struggle from the clutches of the fruit barrel. Springs tightened in the wooden fingers and applied pressure to the delicate fruit until it split open and splashed its juice over his palm and onto the floor.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Watching as Edgar raised a hand in small jerks, the fruit in his grip disappeared with a juicy explosion and a soft plop. I wiped a bit of pulp off the knee of my pants. I suppressed a winch at the sight of the pulp that dripped from Edgar’s wooden hand.

“I’m really glad you didn’t want to shake my hand. Besides, I prefer gummy to wood any day.” Girlfriend? I said to myself, my laughter dying out. Out of all of things I had expected that was not one of the things I had foreseen. Behind Edgar and myself the crew around the Captain began muttering darkly. I arched a brow at Edgar, staring at him for a long moment, considering. Finally I smiled slightly at Edgar and bowed to him, only a bit mockingly.

“Calico, still cute as ever. You’re just as I remember reading.” I spoke just loud enough for Edgar and his godling controller to hear me. Pushing on the doorframe to help my balance, I pulled my self upright. A hand caught my arm just as I began to turn. Annoyed with the unwanted touch, I hissed and yanked my arm away from the rough hand. The same crusty old sea hand that had gotten to friendly as before stood there, more than a little superstitious fear gleamed in his eyes. Behind the captain the same fear shone in every set of eyes. I caught the word sorceress, demon and witch as the low mutter of the men reached my ears once more. Great, I’ve just become a target for several sexually frustrated, superstitious morons.

“Lady.” I looked at the Captain; he too showed signs of the same fear. At least he’s not treating me like a little girl or his next conquest anymore. Inelegantly I snorted softly to myself, this day just kept getting better and better. What was next? A sea dragon appeares and kills all of them? Actually, that’s not a bad hope.

“Yes, Captain?”

“I’m afraid you and your, companion will have to leave the ship as soon as possible. We will not harbor unholy creatures aboard this ship.” I stared at the Captain, my eye narrowed to thin slits. Self important, puffed up little peacock of a man. How did you make Captain and stay alive this long?

“Let me get this straight. I have done no harm to you or your ship. Until just now I had no idea Edgar was aboard this ship. Now you think I am an unholy creature? I can’t say much for Edgar. He’s just… just, well, he’s Edgar. You want to kick us off this ship, are we even close to land?” I stared at the Captain, all amusement I might have gained while I watched the Captain struggle to not flush in shame was burned away by indignant outrage.

“Land was sighted a half-hour ago, Miss…”

“Ms.” I snapped cutting him off.

“By row boat it would take you a handful of hours to reach the shore. You have no choice in this matter.” The Captain continued as if I had never spoken a word.

“I see. Very well, Captain.” I walked forward keeping my pace slow and even, the men, even the Captain gave way before me. I turned my head to look over my shoulder at Edgar.

“Edgar, you’ll need to follow me. The Captain of this ship has horrible manners to his guests. Captain, I bid you pleasant dreams.” Slowly I made my way back to my room. It took me only a few minutes to stuff my scattered belongings into my pack.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Insane minds have trouble concentrating on details, especially when they come in waves. Therefore, Calico didn’t bat an eye at this woman’s mention of having read about her. The fact that it came right after a compliment distorted it even more as her face curved with an abashed, ditzy grin. Hehe. I like her. You know how to pick’em, sweety.

The next snippet of conversation that Calico bothered to pay attention to was the captain’s rather rude command that they row the rest of the way… to wherever this ship was going. Calico hadn’t bothered to check the destination that this little field trip would take them to. Before she could share her own feelings, though, Edgar’s appointed girlfriend told him to follow her. Much to Calico’s surprise, her puppet’s mind twitched at recognizing a command. It was as if he wanted to do as she said, but only as much as he was capable of actually “wanting” anything. He was a creature of reflex before thought, after all.

Go ahead, Calico said proudly as she made an emphatic pushing motion, Every man has to someday leave his mother and take orders from another woman. She didn’t sound very sad about it, perhaps because deep down she knew that day was very far away.

Edgar jolted forward shakily, then remembered the rhythm of walking, or what he made do with, and toddled over to the door that his target had went through. His master’s voice kept buzzing in his head the whole time.

How nice of her to wish that mean man pleasant dreams. If it were up to me, I wouldn’t wish him pleasant dreams at all. Oh! Oh! It is up to me! Wahahaha! Bubble-Edgar, add Captain Sour-Pants to the to-traumatize list! She pointed sternly at the her quivering, mindless mass of Hanchulan putty, laughing all the while at the horrid, yet wistfully humorous, dreams she would send to the poor captain. The Edgar-ish frame replied as it always did when addressed. It let its limp jaw fall open and made a sound like a kitten on a bungee cord. Good. Now, don’t forget it. It already had, and in about five minutes, so would she.

The girl had just finished packing and was coming back to the door. She paused long enough for Edgar to step out of her way before he was trodden over, a lesson that had taken four straight days in the Radasanth bazaar to learn. The crew was visibly impatient. Some thumped their boots with crossed arms while others stared nervously into Edgar’s skull. Relief flooded through them when they realized she was ready to go and they flattened themselves against the walls of the corridor to let her pass beside as opposed to over them. Edgar followed her proud pace as best he could, immediately lagging behind.

Wait a sec, honey. Edgar froze right next to the captain, and every hand that wasn’t already clenched or on a dagger was well on its way. We should at least be polite. Shake the spooty man’s hand. Rigidly, Edgar cocked his one wooden arm into handshake position. The majority of tattered orange skin still hung off his fingers and proceeded to drip on the captain’s polished shoes. The man sneered as he made sure that this… monster… could see his hand on a short sword at his belt. Um… Cancel that. How about you just kiss each cheek like the Frenchies do?

Edgar did, moving much like one of those toy birds that bobs its beak into a bowl of water. The only difference was that he did it with a force that could drive nails. The first thud was the captain’s head meeting the wall as his tricorner hat bent like foil. The second thud was juicier, causing a stream of blood to trickle around the ball of his nose and into his screaming mouth.

Amid unsheathed blades and angry shouts, two bodies dashed up the stairs and into the rowboat on the starboard side. The first one landed gracefully, given the circumstances, and completely unscathed. The second, only a few steps behind thanks to the wonder of forward momentum, landed face first with a sound both solid and watery. Half a dozen daggers stuck up from the right side of his back, pinning his cloak there as the other side flapped raggedly with soggy holes every few inches.

“Cut the demons loose! May the sea swallow them!” shouted the captain, audibly spitting out blood at the same time. They were sailors, not pirates, and they knew how much profit there was in fighting. So, it was only seconds before the ropes supporting the small craft splintered and sent it heavily to the water’s surface with a fanfare of screaming pulleys.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Night found Edgar and myself within sight of land. Ragged mountains rose up steeply not far form the shore and extended as far as I could see. Exhausted, I struggled with the oars, pulling the small craft along. I found myself too tired to even keep up the curses that I had muttered for the first hour or so in the little rowboat. I was fairly certain that had Calico had heard any of the inventive ways I had thought up on how to punish the Captain and his crew of I would be the recipient of a moderately unpleasant hug.

Once when I turned to look at the shore, trying to gauging the failing light how far I had to row I caught a glimpse of ruins under the water. With the help of the waning moon I could just barely make out the remains of several buildings. What once must have been a tower lay on the ocean floor in a long path of broken stone. Shoving aside my natural, unending curiosity I began rowing once more. Quietly, I hoped that the current that previously had helped too bring us closer to shore remained the same.

~~~~~

The moon glided through the highest reaches of the black velvet and diamond strewn sky by the time I felt the bottom of the boat grind to a halt on the sandy beach. A pained hiss escaped me as I forced my hands to release the handles of the oars. Blinking away the tears that were beginning to form in my eyes and looked down at my hands. My palms were raw from blisters rising and bursting on the soft, un-calloused skin. In more than one spot blood oozed sluggishly from abused skin.

The thought of infection worried me; I had no supplies to fight bacteria. I looked at the ocean and wondered if it would be a good idea to rinse my hands in the salt water. I discarded the idea as soon as it occurred to me; there would be no telling what lurked in the water. Not to mention the salt would burn like nothing else. I laid my shaking hands in my lap, palm up and looked up at the moon, waiting for the stinging flesh to quit its complaints before I tried to haul my tired body and pack out of the boat on to shore.

Despite my best efforts, a few tired tears slipped down my face. I looked at the shore, it was so close and yet too far away for me to get to.

“I really need to tie the boat down somehow. I don’t know if I can row back to the island again if we get pulled out to sea.” My gaze shifted to where Edgar sat, I shook my head to clear my fuzzy vision. For some reason the hard wood of the rowboat seemed oddly comfortable to me right now. My head snapped up as I nodded off for just a moment.

“Edgar, would you secure the boat? I don’t want to go back to sea…” I trailed off loosing my train of thought. I sighed and let my eyes close, drifting to sleep.

[Angel Under Glass]

Among the half-submerged ruins, a small boy floated, face down and motionless. His silver hair was plastered to the back of his head while a green cloak covered the rest of him and waved about on the ocean’s surface. There was no breathing motion from his torso, nor bubbles from around his submerged face. His eyes still moved though, black orbs with only the slightest hint of white at the edges. They scoured the landscape under the waves where a broken tower lay among rough rubble and pitted sand. It was a harsh path of devastation, not like the other sunken buildings that had been worn smooth long ago.

Night fell. Still, the boy floated there and watched. The clear water had darkened to the point that he could no longer make out the top of the tower with its small arched windows and tiny balconies. The people became more visible, though. They glowed faintly, their outlines just distinct enough to differentiate between man, woman, and child. All were dressed strangely. Large clam shells or pelts upon their torsos, pads of kelp on their shoulders or heads, and slim leggings stiff like plates of bone. Only a few were visible at a time before they shifted into darkness and another handful of otherworldly bodies took their stroll down the streets of the sunken ghost town. They seemed oblivious to the tower wreckage that had only arrived there last night.

The child wasn’t scared. He knew much of these people despite only seeing them amassed for the first time tonight. Grandfather sometimes called them entities, or spookies. They had lived there for a long time, and they would do so forever.

His eyes flicked back to the tower. Would grandfather live with them forever? If he was supposed to, it hadn’t happened yet. The boy knew because he hadn’t seen the light. When mother had crawled up on the shore just after their home fell, she was broken. She stopped moving. Then, her light rose up and hugged him. She was alive forever, now. With him forever.

Under his cloak, he hugged his arms about his chest where a small device, encased in wood, hung from his neck. He could feel her warmth in it, but not grandfather’s. Grandfather’s light was still in grandfather, then. At that wishful thought, a wooden bar in the box began to spin quickly. After a few seconds it clicked to a stop and began to rotate the other way at a much slower pace. As it did so, a gentle elderly voice came from it.

“Tzaphiel is the name I have given him. ‘Angel of the Moon’, I’m told it means. Jolly fitting too. He was born under a full moon, and his eyes still track it from window to window every night.”

Tzaphiel listened with a sad smile, just as he had all the innumerable times he had played the message while he waited. Grandfather would come out of the tower soon. He just needed to wait longer. He would have waited for an eternity if not for the distraction.

It was very strange. So much so that he couldn’t identify it immediately. It was too multi-toned to be the waves, too unnatural to be the sun’s heat that he had felt washing over his back earlier. It was… voices. Mother and grandfather had voices, but mother didn’t speak anymore and grandfather was below while the sound came from above.

With a quick kick of the legs, Tzaphiel flipped onto his back. He bobbed with unusual buoyancy as he stared up motionlessly. The moon, a mere sliver, had caught his attention. It seemed welcoming yet stern as if angry that it had been neglected. Tzaphiel’s heart ticked loudly as he studied it, absorbing the same gentle light that had stirred the glowing people to motion. For what seemed a long time, he lost himself to the influx of energy and quickening of his clockwork heart. Only when he was full did he remember what had caused him to look up, and he turned his head to the side to investigate.

At the beach, there was a dark person-shape pulling a large object from the water. To his eyes, that person glowed slightly. But, it wasn’t the glow of one who lived forever, just one who lived strongly. In the cold, oblivious landscape around him, that warm glow was a beacon. He swam to it full of hope.

[Twisted Infinitum]

It would have been gentlemanly to help the poor girl row the boat. Too bad Edgar wasn’t gentle. Even his designation as a man was somewhat arbitrary. Only Calico’s command would have moved him to such a strenuous course of action, and she was busy. From almost before the boat hit the water, she had been searching. With night falling, it was only a matter of time before Captain Sour-Pants took a pre-landing nap. When he did, she was ready to catch him. The rudeness was easily dismissed, and long forgotten by now. The sticking of Edgar like a Christmas ham was what deserved her ire. Oh, such ire.

Beyond the colorful, spherical horizon lay all the pinpricks of thought that sleeping mortals produced with their puny minds. Her senses shifted over all of them as she floated about and twisted randomly with a vengeful snarl on her cute-as-a-button face. Aha! she cackled victoriously when she found it. With just a flick of one clawed finger, a large red bubble popped into existence in front of her and immediately played every detail of her victim’s life at blinding speed. She tapped a finger to her mouth, bored and speculative.

Nothing useful here, Edgar. Just the usual boring life of a boring old coot. I’ll have to be creative! she said without looking at the Edgar bubble behind her. If she had, she might have noticed Edgar’s girlfriend heaving on the oars with all her might. If she had, the captain might have been saved from one hell of a party.

To begin, she placed him below deck in his own ship. It would feel very natural to him, as if he was going about a usual day. The cargo hold was closed behind him, and his room was just to his right. Leisurely, he paced to the corner that would lead to the stairs.

As if extracting something from an invisible bag, Calico produced a tubby toy version of the ship. It was just big enough to fill her hands and exactly detailed, though in a cartoony way. In the mortal world, the feminine carving at the bow wasn’t bug-eyed with a dopey expression on, though it certainly added a bit of Calicoesque charm to the scale model.

Let’s start with a little bit of waves, she said to herself as she slowly pitched the model forward and back. The image in the bubble showed the captain stumbling forward as his ship’s motion surprised him. Being a seasoned sailor, though, he caught himself against the wall and headed toward the corner at a decent clip. “Those fools must be turned the wrong way for use to roll this much on a calm night,” he growled under his breath. He rounded the corner and took a few steps before he realized that the staircase wasn’t there. Instead, it was the hall that he had just attempted to leave. Suddenly worried, he shook out his sea legs to keep from getting turned around again and headed for where the stairs should be. Once again, he wound up heading right down the hall with his cabin door slightly open to his left. A sudden wave kicked harder than the others, forcing him to brace against the door frame. “The hell…” he attempted to curse as his bewilderment silenced him and fear began to tickle his tempered resolve.

Nooooow…. Earthquake! Calico screamed childishly as she suddenly shook the ship like an unopened present. The captain fell through the door and into pitch darkness. It was like no wave he had ever felt. The floor heaved and kicked under him, and everywhere he heard heavy wooden objects bouncing. He tried to feel around, but all he found was a crate that went sliding past him so fast that it almost took his hand with it. The cargo hold? he asked himself, his mind still rational despite the unstable world around him. The room shook harder, sending him sprawling forward. Crates and barrels bounced over him or grazed him on their way past, leaving no injury, just a dark maelstrom of rude pushes. The next object he struck was more solid, and the area around it was decidedly moist. He clung to what felt like the remnants of a barrel, pausing long enough to detect a strong citrus smell, before he fumbled for the nearest wall and followed it amid the rain of cargo. The juice and rind of numerous oranges flowed slickly underfoot, forcing him to his belly so often that his shirt and face were shiny with juice. Finally, he saw a crack of light coming from under a door. Gasping with elation, he crawled to it and pushed it open while he hung limply from the handle. The lamp lit hall greeted him as the shaking and noise seemed to fade behind him.

Calico’s face twisted as if she’d been shot up with five gallons of sugar. Her laughter bounced off the horizon, filling all of dream space with childish glee that carried more than a hint of lunacy. The finale, she paused for dramatic effect, the toy boat lifted above her head like a prize, Pistols at dawn! With perfect major league style, she pitched the boat away from her and just as quickly pulled a Colt .45 out of nowhere.

The sound of three shots rang through the ship as the captain forced himself to his feet and once again stumbled for the stairs that probably weren’t there. He was whimpering quietly, though it grew louder as the wall in front of him exploded to fragments and the opposite wall followed. He froze. The trajectory of the projectile was tangible across his chest, hot and sinister. The home he had known for years seemed to buckle around him as another metal-tipped cyclone turned the hall behind him to shrapnel.

Wailing pitifully, he dove into his room and curled up on the ground as another blast ripped the hull open right before his eyes and almost his head with it. Moonlit water appeared in the gaping hole. He could do nothing but stare as it… didn’t move at all. It throbbed teasingly as if to whisper, “I’m gonna get you.” But, it stayed level with the ruined wall.

The captain, now on his knees, began to laugh as it dawned on him. “I’m safe,” he giggled, “The gods of the sea have saved me!” He raised both arms in semblance of prayer. Something caught his eye, then. The watery moonlight filtering into his dark cabin became faded as if a figure was casting a shadow from the opening. He couldn’t see anyone there, though.

Water baby, the dream demon of insanity whispered. A small tendril of water lurched into the room, followed by another as the small body slipped forward. It was a bubble, sloshing with fullness, that seemed to slip in and out of the form of a small child. More followed as it stepped forward, and still more until it was a slow torrent of bodies, each indistinct from another.

The captain laughed louder at seeing them. They embodied all the slowness and futility of a sailor’s death at sea, but they were so cute. He just wanted to hug them all, drink them in until he couldn’t make a sound. They obliged him. Moving single-mindedly, they pushed him to the soggy floor and bore him down, their bodies heavier and heavier on his mouth that had given up its fight for air.

“Graaaa?” asked her half of Edgar as it fidgeted madly, which was only a bit more than usual. Calico took time to contemplate her triumph over another spooty mortal, then poked the bubble out of existence. The ruined tubby toy popped back into nothing as well.

Was that applause, sweety? she asked as she turned around. Thank you very much! After a few bows, she realized that Edgar’s girlfriend wasn’t in as celebratory a mood as her. In fact, she was drifting into a blistery sleep in front of the lovely moonlit beach. Ahhh. Isn’t that sweet? You picked such a cute girl, honey. Hop out and tow the boat up on shore so the waves don’t wake her up.

Edgar’s mind jumped back into motion after its long nap, but his body didn’t jump nearly as well. He got out of the boat face first and managed to soak every inch of himself before creaking upright in the waist deep water. Sloshing and clicking, he churned his way to the front of the boat and pulled on the rope attached there. With walking such a difficult chore, pulling something was near impossible. But, he did try until he felt something tugging at his soggy cloak.

Casting his bright orange eye down, he saw a silver haired boy who was equally as wet. His mind crashed to a halt as he tried to comprehend the interruption, and Calico let out a squeal that couldn’t have been louder if there was a pink bow on the boy’s head. Isn’t he adoooorable?! Did you have a son also, Edgar?

The child blinked his disturbing eyes as if sucking back tears. He didn’t seem frightened in the least, just disappointed. When Edgar said nothing, he simply looked down and sniffled. Then, he began to move to the water. The construct was too confused, and Calico too spastic with adoration, to say anything. He stopped of his own volition at the water’s edge, where he looked back over his shoulder at Edgar and pointed toward the boat that was drifting slowly back out to sea.

Calico panicked. Oh no! Save her, Edgar! Save her! The puppet ratcheted himself into motion and stumbled out into the black water. He wrapped both hands upon the edge of the boat and with all his might pushed it out to sea. For a second, he just watched it float away. Then he spasmed wildly and collapsed into the water.

No! Silly Edgar. She’s safer with us than out there in the cold, unforgiving ocean, Calico scolded with her hand pressed against Edgar’s bubble. Mommy will show you how to do it. With a grimace of distaste, Calico closed her eyes and put her energy into Edgar’s control device.

Like a scene from a zombie movie, a wooden hand reached up from the water and gripped the edge of the fleeing boat. Then a gooey, boney hand followed. Edgar’s head bobbed up behind them, his eye now blazing red and the flexible side of his face expressing relief. “Gotcha, love,” he said in the singsong feminine voice of his master. Then, the possessed puppet dragged the boat backward as Calico made use of all the strength the frail body could muster. A few moments of whining and struggling passed before she had the boat wedged into the sand and the rope tightly in Edgar’s hands.

The strange boy was staring intently at Edgar now as if he saw a more significant change than just the eye’s coloration. Calico stared back through her newfound mortal presence, then said jovially. “You know… This material world is icky. Just look! I’m all wet. It feels so… sticky.” She spread her frail arms to show the cloak hanging heavily from them. “Edgar, I’ll let you find a place to tie it up,” she said to herself as the body loosened in preparation for her to jump out of it. But, she stopped as the boy came closer and stared even more intently. He didn’t say a word, but he seemed expectant and ready to listen.

Calico hesitated. She circled her gummy foot in the sand as if nervous, then an idea struck her and the half face grinned. “Do you know about Egypt? Wait, silly, that’s another world. You wouldn’t know. Oh well, let me tell you a story about a beautiful and kind god called Bast who once ruled there.” The boy’s mouth quirked up a bit and the tears faded from his eyes. He looked much better like that.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

The pinking noise of water splashing was accompanied once in a while a hollow thunk. To my half sleeping mind I thought someone was at the door knocking to come in from the rain. The repeated knocks gradually wore on my nerves tugging on my consciousness until I awoke fully, yelling.

“Stop knocking on the damned door!” I straightened from the now painful slump I had fallen asleep in and looked around. To the east the sky was just beginning to lighten, pinks and oranges stained the beautiful black velvet sky. On the shore stood Edgar, with him a small, pale boy. They stood on the shore skipping rocks across the water. Well the child was, Edgar on the other hand more often than not hit the small rowboat.

Behind Edgar a long groove was gouged into the sand. Even as I watched he was slowly dragged forward a few inches by the rope tied around his waist. Shaking my head I looked over the edge of the rowboat, gauging how deep the water was. Grumbling at the necessity of getting wet, I pulled off my shoes and socks then stuffed them into my backpack. Holding my backpack in raw hands over my head I slid over the edge of the boat. The water only came to my waist, sighing in relief I tossed the backpack back into the small craft and took a hold of the side of it.

Wadding a shore while pulling a rowboat behind me with tender hands took a bit of time. The hardest part was just making sure that the rowboat was far enough up on the shore to not be pulled out by the tide. I wasn’t sure of anything. Unless you counted fishing out of a boat with your dad a decade ago I had little practical knowledge of how to handle this situation. How far in does the tide come in? It took me a few moments to catch my breath. Once I did I studied the boy. He was a cutie, appealing features, petite, slender, fair skinned, with a silky mop of pale hair. Just cute as a button, until you got to the boy’s black on black eyes. They were a little unnerving to say the least.

Shaking my head and picking up my backpack, I walked over to the two. Ignoring the constant splashing from the rocks hurled into the se, I watched the sun rise. As the warm gold light painted the living manikin, boy and the beach in softer, forgiving tones. I wondered if the rumor of the sage I had traveled all this way was true. I looked down at the sand, noticing how the rising sun was caught and reflected back in billions upon billions of minute sparkling crystal that made up the sand.

“The sooner started the sooner finished. Come on, we need to set up a camp nearby until I find this sage I’m looking for.” I hesitated, looking around for another adult that the boy would belong too. A child out alone by himself this early in the morning? I knelt down in front of him.

“You’re welcome to stay with us until your guardian comes for you.” Standing and brushing the sand off of my knees, I held out a hand to the boy.

“My name is Kahlina. Edgar is the, ah, man in the cloak. There is a lady called Calico that sometimes talks through him. What’s your name?”

[Angel Under Glass]

Tzaphiel had been spellbound by this strange creature for most of the night. Now, as the sun rose, this person’s presence had dimmed to the dull yet resilient light that he had seen from the water. But, for most of the night, especially while he listened to the expansive stories of other worlds, the spirit had been different. To his eyes, it was a bonfire to a candle. When that single eye turned red and the voice became honey drizzled over his ears, the light was gorgeous and energetic. It was as if the energy didn’t know where to go, just that it had to keep moving. He almost hadn’t been able to make out the figure behind all of its light. The impression he did receive of the body, though, was different; more lively and fluid. He couldn’t comprehend why he thought so, but it was distinctly feminine as its spirit burned wildly in the night.

As slivers of sunlight crested over the water, the stories had ended. He could barely remember what was said. It was all so alien to his mind that had only known the tower. But, he couldn’t forget the impression that the world now seemed so much bigger. He wanted to explore it. He wanted to find the love and happiness that this creature had told him about. Beautiful mortal bonds, she had said. The idea was so enticing that he almost had forgotten about his vigil.

It was with guilt that he had remembered. A quick goodbye, then the creature’s light had died down, leaving the body heavy and solid in comparison. Tzaphiel had started to head out to the water again. Grandfather hadn’t risen, he told himself. His eyes may have been blinded, but he would have recognized the gentle warmth of his creator no matter how distracted he was. He still needed to wait.

As his feet touched the water, a rock whizzed by him and disappeared noisily in the ocean. Surprised, he turned with wide eyes. The wooden man, now so dishearteningly plain, had another rock in his wooden arm that was ratcheting back like a catapult. With a lanky, inefficient motion, the rock was sent to the same unspectacular end. The glowing orange eye turned to meet Tzaphiel’s, and he waited expectantly as the creature seemed to be listening to something beyond his own hearing. “Skip, big strong daddy,” the awkward man finally said.

Tzaphiel understood the intent behind the broken words, and he stood for a long while contemplating. If Grandfather came back, he could still see him from the beach, and this creature seemed to want to play. Dim memories tugged at him of times when he had wanted to play but been resigned to do so alone. Grandfather and Mother were very busy sometimes. With a piteous smile, he joined the game.

In a very short time, he had picked up the required movements and refined them until he was by far his friend’s better. Each of his rocks skipped serenely upwards of five times compared to the messy one or two that the ratchety wooden arm sent forth.

The night faded fully away as their game progressed. His friend had to reset often, for the rope around his waist tried to tow him out to sea constantly. He couldn’t remember when it had been fastened, perhaps during the stories, and he couldn’t think of an easier way to keep the small wooden craft from leaving them. There must have been something very important in it, though, for his friend to worry so much.

On the edge of dawn’s magnificence, the waterborne treasure revealed itself with a loud shout. Tzaphiel dropped all the rocks in his hand and stared, though the other seemed not to notice and kept on playing with mechanical determination. A head popped over the edge of the craft, then a body. He couldn’t see it as anything more than a black shape, ringed by a soft aura, against the powerful reflection of the rising sun. For the first time since he had lost himself in the game, he appreciated the beauty of the sunrise. It began to unnerve him, though. There was so much light moving on the waves as if it had life, and it was warm. Delightfully warm. Would he still be able to sense Grandfather?

He almost broke into a run for the water. The young woman’s face stopped him, though. Intent and kind. He waited a moment, debating whether to meet her gaze or run around her. Then, he truly heard her words, and he latched onto them. Until his guardian comes? She must have known that Grandfather would come up eventually. The assurance in her voice was enough to prove it. If he went with her and his new friend, he could come back and find Grandfather waiting. He would probably be fretting that their home had disappeared. But, by just being there, Tzaphiel could cheer him up.

With a wide grin on his face, the boy hugged the box under his cloak. It began to play. “He noticed me! Oh, look at him smile. I’ve never seen him smile so much. Come here, Tzaphiel. Come to grandpa. He walks so precisely, like he’s been planning it out for a long time. You must have been, my boy. I knew you were always thinking. So smart!” Tzaphiel’s face beamed with the knowledge that he would soon hear his Grandfather’s voice for real.

[Twisted Infinitum]

As much as Calico wanted to continue regaling the little boy with her tales, she decided to leave Edgar’s body well before dawn. Wet cloth was painfully uncomfortable. Add a cold breeze, and it was more than any god worth her worshipers could deal with. It was a pity, though. They were such good stories, and mostly true to boot, that they shouldn’t have to go for so long being untold. Few people could appreciate her stories, for some strange reason.

Fortunately, she had almost as much fun watching Edgar “play daddy”. She had realized by then that he couldn’t be the real father. She would have remembered if he’d ever done the procreation polka with anyone, and then there was the fact that he didn’t have the equipment necessary. All his colored innards were merely decoration, and half a wang isn’t very decorative. So, if he had owned one once (she couldn’t remember) she had probably whacked it off to make his wooden and gummy halves symmetrical. Calico spent a goodly amount of time contemplating that very subject. I should find a way to grow him one, just incase he wants it someday. It’s gotta be biiiig. She stretched out her arms to measure off a length that would frighten any female under twenty feet tall. Now, to snip… or not to snip? She turned back to the bubble. Edgar, honey, are you Jewish?

Edgar’s answer, no doubt a profound insight into the quagmire of the male ego, was preempted by something screaming out at sea. He adjusted his head to look at the sound, but kept throwing rocks without his master’s order to stop. She wouldn’t give it any time soon because she had her nose to the bubble and was watching for whatever sea monster had snapped up Edgar’s one true love. Oh, she’s fine, the dream demon sighed, She just wakes up like a dragon. Careful in the mornings, sweety. Calico suddenly clapped her hands together and swooned, Oh, look at how strong she is, pulling the boat all by herself! It’s good to have a strong woman around. She can open jars for you! You can’t…. Because of the squishy fingers. She wiggled a hand in the half-Edgar’s face to emphasis her point, and it responded by moaning and wiggling its fingers back.

The Althanas-bound Edgar just watched, seeing as he had run out of rocks nearby, as the girl pulled the boat up the beach and made introductions with the little boy. So, his name is Tzaphiel! That’s adorable, but a mouthful. We’ll call him… Zafie! Tell Zafie and your girly friend to follow, because we’re going hunting for a campsite!

His master proclaimed their search with glorious intent and a commanding fist in the air, but Edgar toddled on down the beach at his usual leisurely pace. The sound of his footsteps alternated between heavy thumps and spongy squishes. Then, splashes. He looked around and found that a very taught rope was still connecting him to the marooned boat. With a giggly command from his master, he pushed the lasso down his waist and left it in the water. The boat was far enough up the beach to not need tying up, which was convenient seeing as it was so barren and treeless that Edgar’s body had been the only option nearby.

Again, the search began, and Edgar’s mind finally got around to relaying his master’s words. “Zafie girly girl follow,” he clicked without looking back. It was only a minute before his master told him to stop and point to a spot where the rocky slopes turned to trees. All strewn about were pieces of rock, probably from a recent slide.

It’s the kind of camp that makes strong boys into men and little wimpies into pincushions. Now that you’ve got a son, you’ve got to toughen him up all manly like you.

“Pincushion man,” Edgar muttered in agreement, a statement all too true with the sailors' blades still sticking out of his back.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

I looked down as the little box hung around Tzaphiel’s chest issued the words of Tzaphiel’s grandfather. Hmmm, it’s like some sort of music box. The rods have knobs on them and the tines run across them to produce the words. I think It took me a moment to connect the fact that this child was out here alone in the early pre-dawn hours and his near panicked expression before he watched me intently. Where are his parents? His grandfather? He’s too young to be out and about on his own. For shame! The old man’s voice and the wooden clicking noise faded away. A cool hand, much smaller than mine, slipped into the hand I held out to him. I offered the boy a smile, as I squeezed his hand, in return a lovely smile blossomed across his pale features, making me want to hug the small boy. His black on black eyes still unnerved me slightly but Tzaphiel seemed like a sweet child. I wondered vaguely why he had not spoken. Perhaps he was mute, a little slow or he just didn’t like to talk.

“ ‘…Zafie girly girl follow.’” Edgar clicked at us as he lurched up the shore.

“Zafie? Girly girl?” Earlier he called me girlfriend, what is with the pet names?

“Huh, oookay.” I shook my head, wondering at the things that ran through the insane demi-goddess’ mind. Pushing curiosity aside I quickly scooped up my pack and hurried to catch up to Edgar. A step later I had to slow my pace, I was unwilling to drag Tzaphiel behind me like some life-size doll. The odd being awkwardly lurch onward over the giving sand until at some signal from his master he stopped only a minute or two later.

When Edgar's arm rose jerkily to point towards a stand of trees, I looked at the area, doubtful that the relatively exposed area would be safe to set up a camp. Despite my misgivings about the area chosen by Calico. How could an immaterial being know where to set up a proper camp that would be safe? I left Tzaphiel by Edgar and went to scope out the trees. The rocks strewn across the ground, made the site less than ideal for a place to rest. Not to mention the fact that one side of it was open to the shore. If a storm blew in Tzaphiel and I would have very little shelter from the wind’s ravages.

I turned to call back to my ‘group’ of traveling companions that this was an unsuitable place to stay. A small sign caught my attention out of the corner of my eye, hidden at the base of a tree it all but blended into its surroundings. Looking carefully at the sign, I realized that it was covered in symbols and writing that looked like nothing more than chicken scratch. A few feathers were attached a corner of the sign suggested to me that perhaps it had been some form of fowl that had placed the sign. Great, just what I want. An island with intelligent birds. Man, I hope the Sage isn’t one.

Kneeling in front of the sign, I finally spotted a slight dip in the earth. Nearly invisible, a path disappeared into the trees, the center of the path curved slightly inwards as if many feet traveled it over the years. I sat back on my heels and looked up the path, listening to the local fauna wake and set about their daily routine. Unhurriedly, I walked back to my pack and dug through it, trying to find the little Swiss army knife buried some where within it. At long last I found the blasted little thing and shoved it in my pocket.

I took out two of the peppermint flavored hard candies that I carefully hoarded. One, I unwrapped and popped in my mouth the other I pressed into Tzaphiel’s hand. Sucking happily on the peppermint I stood up and finally noted that Edgar was a walking arsenal. Near a dozen daggers and short swords were embedded deeply the wood of Edgar’s back.

“Pincushion man indeed, Edgar.” I muttered to myself, thinking the creature’s disjointed ramblings were truer than anyone knew. Carefully prodding Edgar’s gummy side I waited for a reaction. When there was no reaction I tried tugging on the blades in Edgar. Several were so deeply embedded that I could not pull them out. No wonder the sailors left the blades. How can I get them out of him? I wondered starring at Edgar.

“Edgar, could you lay on your, ah, front? I want to pull the weapons out of your back.” I waited for Edgar to lie down, to move, to do anything. When he remained in his zombie mode I stepped in front of him and waved my hand in front of his face.

“Hey, Calico. It’s Kahlina. I need Edgar to lie down on his stomach so I can get the weapons out of his back.” For a long moment nothing happened. I began to consider simply trying to knock Edgar over.

“Like turtle.” Edgar’s deep raspy voice came out suddenly, his jaw clicking. I had to jump to the side as Edgar toppled forward, face first into the sand. I stared down at Edgar, unable to help myself I began to chuckle.

Still laughing quietly to myself I carefully turned Edgar’s head to the side. Unsure if he breathed or not I dug a little channel in the sand in front of his face to allow airflow. Carefully maneuvering, I sat on Edgar’s hips and grasped the handle of the closest dagger.

With a jolt that nearly unseated me I succeed in pulling the first dagger free with a lot of effort. Gripping Edgar’s sides more firmly with my legs I moved on to the other weapons. Soon enough all of them lay in the sand near by. I hopped off Edgar, for a moment I hesitated. Wondering if I should roll him over or if I should just leave him as he was.

“I’m done now, thank you.” I shrugged, it never hurt to be polite to any creature, especially one with delusions of god-hood. Not to mention I knew it would be a bad idea to piss off Calico. She could make my dreams into nightmares possibility for the rest of my days. Or at least as long as she remember too. I checked over the weapons, discarding most of them. I wound up with one short sword and two daggers. The steel blades were unmarred by rust, the handles were in relatively good condition.

Okay, at least the weapon problem has been solved. Now I need to find out what lies down that path.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Calico sat, legs elegantly crossed, upon nothing at all as she watched through the Edgar bubble. One finger played through her long white hair as her eyes crinkled and her mouth curved sweetly. She’s so good to you, the proud mother remarked as light once again hit Edgar’s eye through the air hole that his love dug for him. The dream half of Edgar seemed to answer, for his eye bulged and he drooled out a questioning grunt. Calico brushed a fuzzy hand against his cheek to taste the sensations that seemed to be bothering him.

Awwww… Calico cooed. She’s straddling you like a pony! That’s because you’re such a handsome little boy. Yes it is.

The bubble’s image of a sandy hole jolted once as the first blade was ripped from its nook. Edgar seemed to take little notice, though his eye still ogled about as if expecting a command. It’s okay. I know how it is, hormones at your age and all, but just stay calm and let her make the first moves. Gently, Calico patted Edgar’s half-cranium, and another tingle of sensation came through. She seemed genuinely surprised. Wow! When your girly girl latches on, she really holds tight. I bet she could crush walnuts between her knees. It’s good you don’t have any of those either.

The image wobbled back and forth, then popped upward as another blade was worked from his back. Edgar seemed to be growing concerned, at least as far as his emotional spectrum allowed for. There were other times that he had been left at the mercy of offending forces with nary an instruction on how to respond, though those other times involved monsters or even men with steel-toed boots. The barest glimmer of an idea formed in his head that these times were decidedly not good.

Calico had turned away, though, as she ruminated over something. You know, sweety, I’ve just been calling her your girlfriend. You never did tell me her name, she said in a reprimanding tone. Edgar let out a raspy gurgle far louder than usual, which Calico could only assume meant one thing. No, you don’t have to apologize. I’ll just try to remember… Didn’t she say it to Zafie-doodle? Thinking intently, she rubbed a claw against her lower lip. Edgar’s eye jolted one last time, and then his dream half relaxed back to its normal spastic wiggles. Whatever was happening to him had stopped, just as it had all the other times when people realized what they were stepping in.

Kahlina! Calico screeched. It’s important that you remember so you know what to write when signing for her mail. Kah-lin-a.

The material Edgar lay dead still in his bed of sand as Kahlina thanked him, which didn’t mean a thing to his feeble brain. His jaw fell open, and a very quiet utterance fell out. “Ka-ka.”

Time passed in which orders were given with no shortage of sugar and honey. Then, he creaked back to a standing position as if spring loaded. Only V’dralla’s technicians knew for sure, but he may very well have been.

[Angel Under Glass]

Kahlina’s hand was warm. Tzaphiel couldn’t remember if his mother’s hand had been like that. Increasingly, his time with her and grandfather in the tower seemed more distant as he became used to these new people. It was almost frightening, as if he was forced to leave behind his most treasured possession only because he couldn’t find a way to carry it. This kind woman made him feel better, though, with her reassuring words and the soft comfort of her hand as they followed the wobbly man down the beach.

When they stopped at a signal from Edgar, Kahlina did something that surprised him. She placed a small object in his hand. It looked like a sanded pebble, perfectly round in every respect, that had been wrapped in something clear and stiff. Automatically, Tzaphiel closed his hand around it and looked up with questioning eyes. Kahlina had stripped the outer layer off of another one and placed it in her mouth. To Tzaphiel, she might as well have popped out an eyeball. He stared with openmouthed fascination as she smacked her lips and pressed it against the inside of her cheeks, apparently using her tongue to do so. Then, she turned her back to him as she continued to dig through her backpack.

Tzaphiel held the object up to his face and inspected it closely. The outer layer had been pinched at two ends to keep it in place, and it crinkled when he teased it with a finger. It must have been from a sea animal’s shell, he reasoned. If one were to cut off a layer of shell this thin, it probably would have the same translucence and strength. He spent a while poking at it as if it were an alien life form. Then, he was distracted by a loud cracking sound.

Kahlina had just pulled something out of the wooden man’s back! When Tzaphiel had first seen the protrusions, he assumed they were fins of some sort. If they were, Edgar apparently didn’t want them anymore because he lay very still while she did it. Curiously, Tzaphiel put a hand behind his back and felt along the fabric of his cloak. When he pushed inward, the cloth molded around something rigid that stretched from his shoulder blades to just behind his knees. Gingerly, he gripped the object and applied a small amount of pressure. All it did was force him to bend forward, so he pushed harder as he tried to keep his back straight. He might as well have been trying to waggle a tooth or pull off a leg for all the effect it had. He was relieved. Two nights ago, mother had set that object there in her last material moments. He certainly didn’t want to lose it, whether it was a fin or something else.

With the small gift momentarily forgotten in his clenched hand, he watched as Kahlina put both a small and a large metal object into her pack. Another small one, she wedged under her belt. Then, she led them down the newfound path in the trees with the wooden man behind her and Tzaphiel at the rear. It didn’t bother him to be without her hand, for he was once again distracted by the wrapped object as his little legs padded onward. By accident, he discovered that tugging at both ends made it loosen, and he set about fervently releasing the prize. Once it was naked in his hand, he popped it into his mouth and let the wrapper fall dejectedly to the ground. He didn’t understand. It was just a hard object sitting on his tongue. With an effort, he pushed it to the side of his mouth. In his whole life, he had never needed to ingest anything this way, nor did he produce saliva. So, it was just smooth, sensationless rock that he slid from one side of his mouth to the other. After he got the hang of moving it, he realized that it must be some sort of game or exercise.

That was when it turned on him. In the warmth of his bone dry mouth, it had begun to leave a sticky substance in its wake. At the inner side of a cheek, that substance won out over his tongue and refused to move. As much as he tried to fight it with all his underdeveloped oral acrobatics, it wouldn’t move. In fact, it felt like it was spreading. At this rate, it would fill his head with stickiness in no time!

Instantly, he made a gagging sound normally reserved for members of the cat family. It was slightly different, though, for it had to go around both his hands that were franticly reaching into his mouth to dig out the parasite. With sounds that became even worse, he clawed the goop off of his tongue and teeth and tried to throw it away, only to have it stick to his fingers just as viciously. With hands flailing and feet stomping, he was ready to enter the first tantrum of his young life.

Instead, he froze. Two creatures had just blasted through the treetops above him. They were invisible and silent, so it was only their auras that he detected. They rippled between brightness and darkness and everything in between as if numerous souls had been jammed into those two solitary bodies. He could feel them watching him, those sinister rainbow souls.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

The normal sounds of the forest rose up around my companions and myself. The damp air seemed to envelop us, making the air sticky and thick and me grumpy. Grumbling under my breath about the humidity, I grabbed my hair and knotted it high on my head, ignoring the whispies that escaped to tickle my neck and face. The intermittent breezes cooled skin as made the branches and vines dance around us. Confusing the eye.

An odd noise, almost like the ones my cat used to make, made me pause and look back. Tzaphiel clawed at the inside of his mouth as I watched. I wondered just what he was doing. A small gooey object emerged from his mouth. It took me a moment to realize the sticky object was the piece of candy I had given him earlier. Unable to help myself I laughed quietly as Tzaphiel flailed about. The candy stuck to this hand despite his flailing limbs.

I was reaching for him when he suddenly froze, staring up into the branches above us. Worried, I looked up. Nothing. Not seeing anything I looked down at the boy again. It was obvious he was watching something, his eyes tracked a steady path across the green vegetation above us. How is it he can see anything through the constant movement of the canopy?

“Tzaphiel, what is it?” I asked, hoping the boy would talk to me. I pushed aside the idle thought about his unbroken silence. The wary, awed expression on his face made my skin crawl. I glanced back at Edgar, checking on him, I doubted the odd creature would make any noise if attacked. Something was out of place. I stared into the brush and trees beyond Edgar. It wasn’t until it shifted that I spotted the golden eyes watching us. I stared back, watching it watch us for what seemed like an eternity. This is just like some cheesy jungle horror flick, accept for the fact that I can get eaten.

“Run!” I screamed as the eyes disappear. I reached for Tzaphiel, to carry him and keep him safe. To my surprise Tzaphiel reacted faster than I thought possible. He ran around me, I spun around. Reaching Edgar at a run I latched onto grabbed his gummy arm. A distant part of my mind squealed girlishly at how my fingers sank into his arm. Half pushing and half pulling I got him moving. Several yards ahead of us Tzaphiel was running. If it hadn’t been for the panic that gripped me I might have laughed as I watched Tzaphiel’s short little legs move so quickly and precisely.

Over head, in the canopy a series of insect like clicking came from both sides of us as we ran. Behind us the branches of the underbrush whipped about in a fury. The creature with the golden eyes chasing us. I just knew it, just as I knew I was going to be breakfast if it caught up to me. I was beginning to tire, the stitch in my side stealing my breath. If I survive this I am so taking up jogging. I thought as my breath came in wheezing gasps.

The path before us turned and twisting before spilling us into a clearing unexpectedly. I nearly tripped and fell over Tzaphiel while skidding to a halt. Before us stood an old man dressed in a simple, rough brown robe. From his wizened features unnaturally bright blue eyes twinkled at us, amused at the picture we must have presented. Behind him stood a creature, the stuff of nightmares. Automatically, unable to help myself I studied it. Black fur mixed with carapace to cover its body. The legs ended in something similar to a monkey's agile fingered paw. The head was a horrid mix of a cat and an insect.

At the two thumps behind us I turned, shoving Tzaphiel between Edgar and myself. On the path, just out of arms reach stood two more of the creatures. They stood on two hind legs, the long sinuous bodies coiled over cricket like legs. They reminded me of living springs. Feathers ringed their necks before blending down into the wings that replaced their forelegs. A bird like head sat atop the mismatched body while the compound eyes of a bug watched us. Shuddering I looked away, at least the old man was normal looking.

“I’ve been expecting you.” During my morbid inspection of the nightmares that had chased us, the old man had moved closer to us.

“You were expecting us? Are you the Sage?” I asked, a little confused. The old man laughed, his bright eyes twinkling with amusement at my questions and confusion. For a moment I thought I saw a hint of madness and somber evaluation behind the laughing facade in his eyes.

“I’m always expecting someone, little snake. I am a Sage, yet I am not. Sage, vagrant, madman, scientist, call me Perth.” The old man chuckled, moving around more spryly than what I thought a man of his years could.

“Perth? Like the rune of gambling?” I jumped when the man began to shriek with laughter. The creatures behind us clicked, joining him and making me very nervous. Okay, we’re screwed, royally.

“Yes! Yes. A learned one we have here. Come, put away that steel you hold. Come, we shall talk about what you want and what I’ll have in return.” With that he turned and fairly skipped into the hut on the far side of the clearing. Shaking my head I put the dagger back into my belt and followed the old man with more than a little trepidation. Welcome to my parlor the spider said to the fly. In the back of my head I could hear a tiny high-pitched voice screaming ‘Help me! Help me!’ mocking me.

[Angel Under Glass]

Tzaphiel had never been afraid before. He had known confusion and worry, and even those were fresh. Fear was completely alien to him, but it gripped his little clockwork heart tighter than a giant’s fist. All he could think to do was run away. Then, even that became more instinct than thought when Kahlina shouted. At that moment, her reaching hands seemed just as threatening as the golden eyes in the treetops.

Like a metronome on speed, he charged around her and straight down the path. His will was so intent on that single course that he may as well have been on rails. The feeling of the souls was still there, as was the sound they made. Their clicking vocalizations were so similar to the sound of his own heart ticking wildly that it seemed they were right on his shoulders, so he kept on swinging his bare feet as fast as he could.

He was the first to burst into the clearing, his eyes so wide that they were three steps ahead of him. There he saw the only thing that could have possibly stopped him. It was a haphazardly compiled creature with an essence far more chaotic and dominant than those following him. Stop him it did. With his feet suddenly stilled, though sliding, he leaned so far back that he would have sat down forcefully if not for the metal protrusion down his back. It braced him and left a light gouge in the ground as he was anchored to a stop. Kahlina and Edgar came to a stop right behind him, their feet wiping out any trace of his impromptu anchor’s path.

Before Tzaphiel could decide whether it was safe to run in another direction, Kahlina grabbed his shoulder and scooted him between her and Edgar. Between the two sheltering bodies, he felt the tension leaving him, though he shook fiercely as it did so. They would protect him, he told himself as he gathered Kahlina’s pant leg in one hand and Edgar’s cloak in the other.

For the first time since the chase had begun, he realized that he was free of the goop that had tried to take over his mouth and then his hands. He must have left it somewhere on the path behind. Relieved, though only slightly, he looked behind him and saw that the chasers from the trees had revealed themselves. They still seemed threatening, but less so. Their top halves were clearly like a bird’s. Tzaphiel remembered seeing those from the windows in the tower. Once, Grandfather had shown him a water snake that had found its way into their home, and then released it. The creature wasn’t so strange after all. It was just a compression of what he knew existed.

The conversation between Kahlina and the man was a low priority for him until he heard the old man laugh. The creatures joined in. Despite the strangeness, it made Tzaphiel smile. Bad creatures couldn’t possibly laugh like that.

Apparently, Kahlina and the old man had made friends of each other, for he was inviting them into his little house. With Kahlina leading him, Tzaphiel entered as the man held the door open from the inside and beckoned them forward. Immediately, the difference in scale was startling. What looked like a small hut from the outside was actually a large workshop. There were tables all about and tools, both sharp and shiny, lining the walls. The air smelled meaty, but only faintly. It reminded him of the bowls of “stew” that Grandfather would sometimes carry around and stare at as if he didn’t like them. Then, Mother would normally take him out of the room until, as she said, “he finished it all.”

It didn’t faze Tzaphiel in the slightest that the meat smell came from pieces of animals that sometimes hung over the edges of the high tables. With no blood or decay, all the animal matter was as pristine as freshly dug earth.

“What are you?” old man suddenly asked as he spryly bent forward to look Tzaphiel in the face. Startled, the boy just stared back and clutched his arms around himself. “Very well made,” the man continued as if the lack of an answer didn’t bother him. At this range, Tzaphiel could make out this man’s aura. It was very faint compared to the creatures, and extremely dull. However, it still held an unnatural variance of hues, everything from grey to brown. For a reason he couldn’t explain, it seemed more repulsive than the glaringly disjointed auras of the others.

He couldn’t help but avert his eyes from the man’s intent gaze, which lent him to noticing a pile of animal parts against the nearby wall. Without a glance at anyone, he walked over to it and picked up a lonely white wing. All the pieces were from small creatures, so they fit easily in his childish hands. The wing seemed supple and strong, as if it were just as lively as when it was attached to its owner. With intuition only achieved by the youngest of hearts, he picked up a snake-like body and pressed the wing’s exposed joint to it. The pieces knitted together as easily as if they had naturally grown that way. With a studious expression, Tzaphiel began plugging and joining like a maniac.

[Twisted Infinitum]

As usual, Edgar was oblivious to everything around him. Tzaphiel’s near-tantrum might as well have been a chipmunk sneezing, and the watchers were completely beyond the scope of his senses. It was only when Kahlina grabbed his arm that he registered anything strange around him.

Calico was in the exact same boat. There’s nothing more boring than a nature walk, especially when all you can do is watch. So, she had been drifting around Edgar’s bubble like a dead body in a pool and mumbling to herself the interesting details within sleeping minds as she reached her senses out to them. None held her attention for long. Dear diary, today totally sucked. Stephanie was all like… Open the door, or we’ll come in after you! You don’t want that… Grilled cheese sandwich, and a slice of tomato on the side, please. Oh, and a glass of… Turpentine? Jeez, dad, don’t leave this open. Are you trying to kill the damn dog?! I’m not going to bury it… In the left ventricle. Thank you, nurse. Now, we will close up the wound… With duct tape, the handyman’s secret weapon….

Spooty boring mortals, she grumbled. Then, the shout from her future daughter-in-law reached her. She careened toward the bubble, and almost right through it. What’s going on?! she screamed as the hair all over her stood up. The image showed Kahlina running frantically at the end of Edgar’s outstretched arm. The source of the danger wasn’t clear, but Calico knew what she had to do. Run, Edgar! You can do it! she cheered with all her might as she hopped excitedly. He tried. He really did. But, all he managed to do was keep from falling to his knees as he was whipped forward by his gummy arm. Calico switched tactics. Go, Kahlie! Drag Edgar’s squishy wooden butt!

As with all exciting TV shows, this one ended quickly. In no time, Edgar was stopped in front of a man who, to Calico’s eyes, was just plain wrong. His creatures were wrong, too. That’s what we were running from? Bird-headed snakey doodles? I could make better chimeras than that with my eyes tied behind my back! Isn’t that right, sweety? She patted bubble Edgar’s head. Masterpiece that he was, he responded with a twitchy gurgle and a trickle of ethereal drool.

Again, in what seemed like no time at all, the group was moving. Edgar took up the rear as they entered the hut. Truly, the interior was deceptive in size, though he failed to notice. Calico, with only a limited view, didn’t pay much attention to the confusing physics either. What she did notice were the specimens strewn about all the tables. If she was one of sensitive stomach, it would have induced immediate vomiting. Every surface seemed to be littered with dissected animals. Even more strange was the cleanliness. There wasn’t a speck of blood on body part or tool, some of which looked terribly efficient. It was so clean that it bordered on unnatural. Calico, unsurprisingly, was smitten. Oooo… When you and Kahlie-poo move into a big house, your hobby room should look like this. Imagine all the wonderful pets you can make for the children! She didn’t give a single thought to the obvious question of which would look uglier, the pets or the children. Instead, she cooed and squealed as the eyes on a beheaded hog blinked and a parrot, still intact in a cage, squawked, “Chop chop slice slice.”

The old man had just finished examining Tzaphiel. Like a jack-in-the-box, he appeared in the viewing bubble and sent Calico into a hissing frenzy. Stupid sneaky old patchwork man! she screamed when the sounds she was making returned to Commonspeak. Indeed, to her otherworldly senses, he was far from the sprightly old man that the others saw. His face was cut a thousand times over with scars and seams, each piece distinctly different. One patch of cheek was wrinkled beyond recognition. Another around one eye was so pale and smooth that it must have been skinned off a baby’s bottom. The left ear had a tan three continents away from the other ear, and the eyes were so divided that each pupil was a psychedelic mess.

“I guess this one was made by someone else. An amateur compared to whoever made the boy. It’s not even properly in this world,” the human chimera said as he poked Edgar’s gooey cheek with enough force to make squelchy sounds.

By this point in the examination, Calico was shaking. Her fists were balled so tight the claws would have drawn blood if she had any, and her snarl cut her face in two halves, both of which were turning red. Edgar, she said with hostility bubbling out every nonexistent pore, Super frenchie kiss of doom attack! Then, a miracle happened. Calico, the dream demon of insanity, thought before she acted. Or, at least, before Edgar could get around to acting. Wait. Pause the countdown. Edgar froze with his head reared back as if he was gathering spit. The chimera man stared for a moment, then he moved away. Certainly, no one would want to catch a loogie that was taking that long to work up.

The last time you kissed someone, you got stabbed exactly thirteen times. If you do the super frenchie kiss of doom attack, you’ll get… She counted off fingers until she ran out. Um… about one hundred stabbies. Can’t have that, can we sweety? Let’s go play with Tzaphiel instead!

With a creak of tension fading, Edgar straightened and toddled over to the pile of organic Lego and sat down in front of it. After watching Tzaphiel walk around in a circle with his one-winged snake body held aloft, he figured out the game enough to pick up a dog paw from the collection. With far less enthusiasm, he waved it around like a white flag of surrender.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

“…No.” I said firmly, trying my hardest to stay polite. I was tired of arguing with this insane old man over what the price of my transformation should be. My companions were not up for sell. Not if I had anything to say about it. Time with them was not for sell either. I didn’t trust the creepy old buzzard as far as I could throw him. I was of the very firm opinion that anyone that kept pieces of creatures in their living space was more than a little bent. The only reason I stayed and argued with this mad little mage was the undeniable fact that he could do the changes I wanted.

“Unless you want to be more like one of my other creations, I need live animals. Specific ones. Your… essence, has to be mixed in a careful manner. I need them living to do that!” A shudder rippled down my spine as I envisioned my mind within the body of one of the chimeras Perth had made.

“Fine.”

“And I want to keep them after wards.” Perth shrugged at my expression. “You won’t have any use for the bodies of them.” I honestly didn’t know what I could say that wouldn’t offend the Sage so I bid everyone a good night and turned in. The door the far left was mine, or so the Sage told me.

The room was a big surprise, I stood in the doorway and stared for a long moment. I had been expecting a pallet of some type and a lamp. What was actually was in the room was something similar to my own bedroom long before I ever came to Althanas. Hell, before I got married A bed big enough for three people sat in the far corner. Draped in black and red and covered with pillows it made a welcome sight. The floor was covered, wall to wall, with a soft carpet. Its muted color was hard to guess in the soft light of three lamps that hung from the ceiling.

Curiosity compelled me to peek into the door on the far wall. Inside I found an almost modern bathroom. Happy for the chance to wash the sea salt and grime from my body and hair, I plugged the drain and pulled the cord that hung down from the ceiling. I was pleased to see steaming water pour from a clever set of pipes that run down the wall from the ceiling. Praying the no one would walk in, I stripped and stepped into the water.

Hot! I hissed and had to ease into the water. Even then my skin quickly turned a bright shade of lobster red. After dunking my head and scrubbing several times I noticed a cake of soap that I could have sworn wasn’t there a moment ago. The thought that some one may have entered the room made me hurry to finish my bath. Wrapping the large drying cloth that was supplied around my body, I wrinkled my nose at my clothing. It was dirty and beginning to smell from lack of washing and there was no way I was putting them back on to sleep in.

Tossing the shirt and pants into the now soapy water I dug through my pack until I found the shirt the Kor had ‘requested’ I buy. The black material was soft enough to not itch and covered me from neck to mid thigh. Rolling up my sleeves I set about washing the clothing as best as I could. Jeez, I feel sorry for the medieval woman. This is time consuming and messy. I thought as I gazed down at the wet lower half of the shirt I wore. When I judged my clothing had been scrubbed enough to be clean, I pulled the plug to drain the tub then pulled the string to bring in more hot water. Yelping quietly at the temperature of the water I rinsed the clothing quickly. My guess was that the cleanliness of the clothing was at best, half-assed. Wringing the undergarments, shirt and pants out they were spread out to dry on the side of the tub.

Tired and pleasantly numb from the soak in hot water, I crawled into the bed and snuggled under the covers, hugging a fluffy pillow.

~~~

A soft wheezing breath, almost a snore, next to me woke me up. For a second I almost thought I was back home and Jason slept next to me. Wait, Jason doesn’t snore.[I] Then reality set in with a harsh slap. I screamed and scooted as far away from the person as I could get. I bounced against a wall and froze. It finally occurred to me to see who was in the bed with me, for all I knew I might me the boy, Tzaphiel.

A snort issued from under the cover and the figure moved. I grabbed the cover and tore it aside, using it to cover my bare legs. For a moment I gaped at the still sleep figure of the old man.

“What in the nine levels are you doing in bed with me!” I shrieked at the still figure. Perth groaned and rolled over, looking up at me.

“No need to scream. The doll with the high pitched voice said it was okay as long as I only ‘looked and didn’t touched.’” I could feel my mouth gaping open like a fish, unable to say anything at the moment. The soft squeak of hinges caught my attention. I looked up to see both Edgar and Tzaphiel standing in the doorway watching me.

“You’ve got some nice pins.” Perth said wagging his eyebrows at me. I was torn between embarrassment, anger and confusion. [I]Pins? I wondered. The answer was all too clear when I caught Perth eyeing my exposed ankle and calf. Huffing, I hit him over the head with a pillow and hurried off to the bathroom for my clothing, the sheets and blankets wrapped securely around me.

[Twisted Infinitum]

It’s misunderstandings like this, and how they are dealt with, that define a relationship. Every couple has these situations, either inconsequential or life threatening, and they all must deal with them. Some, in rare cases, have their mommy there to help them through.

Okay, stay calm, sweety. I know what you may be thinking. But, I know that you two have a bond strong enough to survive this, Calico said with palms forward in a gesture both soothing and stern. What Edgar was really thinking was more along the lines of “I have a string of monkey foots and dog bellies”, but that really can’t be expressed fully in the language of drool.

First step is to be honest, the mother-in-law continued as damage control mode kicked in, Tell her that you felt sorry for the poor old chimera freaky man. He gave her his own room, and he looked so sad when he looked in the guest rooms and saw how dusty they were. In a whisper, she added, They smelled like old people. It didn’t occur to the puppet to point out that she had been the one who felt sorry. The true essence of her instructions didn’t occur to him either, as evidenced by his recitation.

“Sorry dusty old people,” he croaked as he stepped into the room with a long chain of animal parts dangling from his hand. Kahlina quickly disappeared into the bathroom, so that probably wasn’t enough of an apology to make up for it.

“I’ll be fine,” the old chimera said as if the words were directed at him, “Sleeping near such a fiery thing reminded me of my younger days.” Despite the opportunity to reminisce, he didn’t seem very happy.

Calico mused to herself, the words filling the puppet’s head. Maybe if you had crawled into bed between her and the old smelly head. A little cuddle would have made her feel better. Lots of families sleep in the same bed, after all. It’s good for bonding.

Edgar took the words for a command, as he tended to do when she rambled, and acted upon them. Purposely, he toddled forward and fell onto the bed with his head turned to look the old chimera dead in the eye. “Bed cuddle. Bonding,” he rattled.

If the old man was as spry as a young man before, he was right back to his childhood days now. Faster than a tyke falling from the jungle gym, he was out of bed and staring down at the still figure with a mix of bewilderment and disgust. “That’s mine,” was all he said as he grabbed the string of animal bits from Edgar’s hand and stalked out the door, nearly running over the young boy as he did so.

[Angel Under Glass]

The old man stomped by Tzaphiel, forcing him to stumble backwards from underfoot. With a faint squawk, he toppled onto his bottom. His seat never touched the ground, though, as the rigidly straight metal hanging from his covered back bit into the earthen floor and tipped him onto his side. He didn’t make any attempt to brace his fall. He simply hugged his new toy as if its preservation was more important than his own. Over the course of the night, his unliving chimera had become recognizable as a genuine, if mismatched, creature. A pair of wings, one dove white and the other crow black, were set high on the snake body. The tip of the tail bore the full length of an exposed cougar’s claw that curved enough to make it an effective hook. Topping the creation was a chubby chipmunk head. The eyes were still bright and intent, though only on what was directly before them.

Tzaphiel held the chipmunk dragon to his body as he crawled back to his feet. Sneakily, he looked back into the bedroom. Edgar lay immobile on the bed, apparently not saddened by the theft of his monkey rope that the old man was tossing back onto the pile of organic odds and ends.

Quietly, Tzaphiel stepped into the pretty room and looked at the closed door Kahlina had disappeared into. With his head bent forward and a finger idly stroking the chipmunk dragon’s fur, he tried to imagine why the situation had become so explosive so suddenly. Vaguely, he remembered that all the times he had been laid in a bed, he had been alone. Most of his life had been lived in a bed, in fact. It had been a pretty stone block with coarse, yet soft, padding over it. There were intricate marks scraped down the sides of it. He remembered seeing them for the first time when he had taken his first steps from that birth pedestal. They had seemed so mysterious as the moonlight came in the window and gave them shadows that implied depths beyond just the grooves in the rock. The memories caused the box against his chest to click as it readied a segment of dialogue. However, that sound brought him out of his memories and back into the room where the nice lady called Kahlina had been angered. The speaking box clicked to a halt before words even began.

Again, the boy found himself staring at the door she now moved behind. Never, as far as he could remember, had Grandfather or Mother joined him on his bed. Perhaps it would have been a bad thing to do so. With a content nod at the idea that he understood the world a little better, Tzaphiel turned to look at Edgar. The wooden man hadn’t moved. But, hopefully, he understood as well.

“You all should be leaving if you’re going to get me those animals,” the old man said rudely as he entered the room again. He cast an uncertain look over the still body of Edgar, on past the still closed door to the bathroom, and finally down at Tzaphiel. The boy looked up at the strange man and his murky aura with the same surprise he had earlier. “That’s mine, too,” the man said gruffly as he snatched the chipmunk dragon out of Tzaphiel’s arms. The boy blinked, his arms hugging desperately at nothing. His eyes and lips quivered as he watched the thief’s moody shoulders retreat back into the workshop. Tzaphiel took a few steps forward with one hand outstretched pleadingly, but he didn’t receive so much as a glance.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

In the bathroom I muttered to myself about senile, perverted old men. I was slightly mollified to find my clothing clean and dry, even the seams were dry. Oddly enough there were not any wrinkles in the clothing either. It made me wonder, last night I could have sworn the soap I used had not been there originally. I had to wonder if the old Sage had ghosts as servants or was something even more odd happening here. Who knows with an insane Sage?

Emerging from the bathroom after brushing my hair up into a ponytail and washing my face I stopped at the sight of Edgar lying on the bed. In the doorway Tzaphiel stood, his back to me, watching something out in the main room. For a moment I looked at him then switched my attention to Edgar. Edgar looked like some demented toy of a giant, one that the giant had cast on to the bed and simply left there as if bored with him. I wasn’t certain if I was amused or just a little worried about the fact that he lay there like a dead thing.

“Edgar?” I walked up to the edge of the bed and looked down at him. I hesitated to touch him, I didn’t know what he was doing.

“Come on, its time to leave.” At the door Tzaphiel’s expression stopped me, I knelt down beside him, lightly touching his shoulder.

“What is it kiddo? You look like you’ve just lost your best friend.” I had come to the conclusion that Tzaphiel didn’t speak, I was just unsure if he could not or would not. For my efforts at comforting him I got a sad, nearly despairing look before he turned his gazed back to watching the old sage. I noticed the odd creation he held and the way Tzaphiel looked at it. Now I see. Should have known that old buzzard was a bully. I guess the expression on my face was enough to alarm even the psycho old man. He wavered at the icy stare I sent him.

~~~
The sun shone brightly, the tip of it just beginning to crest the tops of the trees. Around us the sounds of the daytime animals of the jungle were in full swing. Birds called and shrieked, once in a while something screamed as it was caught and made into a meal. Yay, gotta love the food chain. Beneath it all the low buzzing hum of insects coursed through the air with a merciless relentlessness.

I look down at the four small, plum sized stones the Sage had given me a moments ago. They looked like they were made of aquamarine. Oddly enough I suddenly remembered that aquamarine was a stone that was supposed to protect travelers. Somehow, I didn’t think that’s what Perth meant for the stones.

“Okay, I give up. What are these for?” I asked waving the hand holding the stone in them. Perth sighed, a long-suffering and much abused noise.

“Each stone will show you the animal you need to capture. Touch the stone to the creature and it will be transported to a location near here where I can work on the potion for you. Remember, I need all of the creatures alive. A dead creature has no essence for me to use.” I nodded, out of the corner of my eyes I caught sight of Tzaphiel watching Perth. The same wounded expression lurked in his eyes. I caught Perth looking at Tzaphiel as well. He looked back to me and I frowned at him, trying to mimic my mother’s disapproving expression as best as I could.

It seemed to work well enough. Perth gave another of his long suffering sighs and quickly shuffled into the hunt. He returned with an odd creation and tossed it to Tzaphiel. He caught me watching and shrugged.

“The pieces have been attached to one another for too long. If I took it apart the essences would no longer be viable. Let the brat take it.” I objected to the Perth calling Tzaphiel a brat but held my tongue. Tzaphiel looked ecstatic at the return of the odd, mismatched creature.

“Alright, everyone ready? Let’s go.” Just as the dense foliage began to swallow us I heard Perth call out.

“Head east to the pass; it’s the easiest way to cross the mountains. You’ll find the animals you seek on the inner ring of the island.”

[Twisted Infinitum]

What was it that held Edgar’s attention for so long? The wall, of course.

Pretty? Calico asked herself as she examined the image in the bubble. Edgar was helping her by not moving from the bed, though that was only because she hadn’t told him to. What do you think, sweety? the master asked her puppet. All she received was an affirmative grunt from the material half of Edgar and a sudden jolt to the dream Edgar’s normal quivering. It could have been anything from agreement to surprise, or even confusion at the words that weren’t in the form of a command. For once, Calico didn’t have a clear enough idea to superimpose it on Edgar’s nonsensical communication.

As she saw it, nothing about this house was normal anymore. It had taken a while to focus, though, because the illusions cloaking it were remarkable for a mortal’s handiwork. Everything about the bed, wall, and floor in her view was disturbingly clear in the same style of patchwork as the old chimera’s own body. Panels of wood and mortar made up the structure, but they overlapped as if trying to consume each other. The bed itself was a collection of colors and weaves that defied explanation. Some pieces were as sheer as a brothel girl’s attire while others were straight from a quilting party of grandmothers. To Kahlina and Tzaphiel, it would seem like a natural blanket, perhaps partly due to their expectation that it was.

It was fortunate that they couldn’t see it. Even Calico was bothered by some of the other… things… worked into the material. If she had to hazard a guess, she’d wager that the brothel girls and grandmothers were still there. She couldn’t tell which was which, though. Each was indistinguishable as a spot of dark color on the fabric, as if the material was bruised and inflamed. Worse yet, the spots didn’t stay still. They glided about, off the bed and up the walls, like the shadows of sea creatures just below the surface.

Calico couldn’t find words to describe the scene, but it held her transfixed nonetheless. Kahlina moved momentarily into view, which only caused the dream demon to arch her neck to look around her. The words that flowed from the mortal plane didn’t register at all.

After Kahlina had moved away, the spots seemed livelier. Calico looked around worriedly. She had the impression that blood had dripped through the surface of those patchwork walls and the inhabitants were hungry for it. Nothing seemed amiss, however, as the organic shadows moved to the bathroom door, still ajar, and congregated in the ceiling beyond it. Something solid appeared there; something between wood and stone and meat. It reached down in the shape of a puffy hand and gently closed the door, cutting off Calico’s view.

She didn’t mind. In fact, she was about ready to leave. Um… time to scooty scoot, Edgar, she said with a gentle wave as if trying to shoo crowds from an amphitheater. If the nervousness in her voice was any indication, that amphitheater was on fire and probably about to explode.

She waited, but Edgar didn’t move. Sweety-doodle? she asked as she tentatively poked dream Edgar’s cheek, then gasped. He was hesitating! His brain was so immature that he wouldn’t have survived if breathing was a necessary part of his biology, but she clearly felt his desire to stay. Shock turned to anger, and she drifted back with hands on hips to scold him soundly. Bad Edgar! You can’t play with the meat puddles. They won’t play nice… I think. Anyway, mommy told you to go. Hoppy hop after Kahlina!

The puppet righted itself with an air of regret. As he moved to the door, that soon faded and the focused intent of his stride returned. Out of the corner of his eye, Calico saw the old chimera at the pile of animal parts. He had Edgar’s rope in his hands and was tugging at the end. With a soggy pop, the first monkey paw came off. Immediately, it went limp in the old man’s fist. Of all the severed matter in the workshop, only that paw looked dead. A grey coloration crept into it as if time was anxious to reclaim what had been denied to it.

Keep going, Calico urged, Before you get eated by the floor. Either uncaring or unafraid, Edgar toddled out the door at his usual pace.

The old man cursed soundly as he threw the monkey rope back onto the pile and followed the puppet outside. Words passed, their meaning fleeting to both dream demon and puppet. Calico was too distracted with having Edgar check himself for missing parts.

“Home,” he clicked to himself without any input from her, which brought her right up to the face of his dream self. No, she said firmly as she pressed a thumb to his half forehead and put the thought out like a puff of ash. The quivering eye stared blankly at her, and she gave him a nurturing smile. If he was going to grow up properly, she had to keep bad influences away from him, and that chimera was nothing but bad influence.

[Angel Under Glass]

Tzaphiel hugged the little chipmunk dragon until its half-living eyes seemed on the verge of popping out. He had almost lost hope of ever seeing it again, and even though he had more warning than when Grandfather had left, he still didn’t know how to say goodbye. Thankfully, that wouldn’t be necessary. He nuzzled the furry head with his nose and thought about the day when Grandfather would return to him as well.

Before his hopeful thoughts could start the box upon his chest playing, Kahlina summoned their little traveling party and they set off into the jungle. Tzaphiel slung the limp pet over his right shoulder, its head bouncing against his back, as he once more took Kahlina’s hand. Nervously, he squeezed it just slightly more than normal. She was such a nice lady. He wanted to tell her how thankful he was, but he felt as if his voice wasn’t ready for such an important job. So, all he had to give her was a gentle squeeze of the hand and a beaming smile. Those, he gave throughout the day’s journey.

The rising sun pushed through the canopy from their right side as the old man’s house disappeared beyond the trees. With no sticky mouth parasites or stalking chimeras to bother him, Tzaphiel finally had time to appreciate the natural life.

He had seen it from the tower before, on those rare days when he would rouse himself from bed and stand on his favorite balcony. It was one that allowed a view of both the endless ocean and the green rise of the island. He had always concentrated on the water, though, for the land was just a blanket of brown and green that seemed lifeless. Now, he knew better. There was still the brown and green, but also everything in between, and it was far from still. The jungle was almost a wall on either side with vines hanging from tall trees and leafy undergrowth reaching up as high as his shoulders. He could hear, rather than see, the animals hidden within. The sound of birds, he remembered. But, those had been shore birds. The birds in the tree tops sounded smaller and sweeter as if they were much gentler creatures than what lived on the coast.

Even the ambient noise of insects seemed gentler than the usual crash and throb of the ocean. It was more elusive, too. Sometimes, he would hear nothing and be forced to strain his ears, which only amplified the lazy, clunking shuffle of the wooden man behind him. Then, the clouds of buzzing would pop up right next to him, giving him a surprise that wasn’t unwelcome. Some would even settle on his clothing, and he could see that they were the same creatures that had occasionally visited the tower. Here, however, they were with their families. They seemed happier.

It didn’t feel like a long time until they reached the edge of the mountains, though the sun’s angle said that quite a few hours had passed. The stone rose jaggedly out of the jungle in cliffs that were so imposing as to make climbing them a clearly foolish idea. Kahlina, to Tzaphiel’s relief, took them to the right instead of up the vertical wall. They stayed tight against the rock as its border lunged in and out of the jungle like a massive creature trying to claw its way to the coast.

Tzaphiel found his attention constantly drawn to the jungle despite his amazement at the rock wall to his left side. As impressive as it was, it didn’t have the warm, clinging feeling of life that hid in the trees.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Tzaphiel’s small warm hand in mine and the uneven sound of Edgar following behind helped, oddly enough, to pass the time. My mind wandered, checking back to reality once in a while to make sure we were still heading in the right direction. At one point I realized I was humming softly under my breath. The fact that I was humming made me smile. Singing in any form always meant I was happy and content with the way things were at the moment.

What I could see of the sky through the gap between the dense canopy and the rock wall was just beginning to change and darken as we finally came upon the pass Perth had spoken of. My ankles and knees ached from the uneven ground we had traveled over, I found it more than a little odd that my feet were perfectly fine. Tossing the oddity aside I stopped and looked at the pass.

Jagged rock rose up on either side of the narrow pass, extending for hundreds of feet into the air. Craning my neck, I looked up at the high peaks. I muttered a quiet thanks to any and all gods that were bothering to listen, grateful that I didn’t have to climb those lofty heights. As if I could, with my fear of heights, I’d get about twenty feet off the ground and freeze.

“Come on guys, I would like to be at the high point of the pass by the time the sun sets completely.” Bouncing to re-settle the pack’s weight across my shoulders and grumbling under my breath, I led us onward.

~~~~~
Night had come, the sun long since fallen from the sky. I sat by the small fire I had started despite the warm night air. Hopefully the fire will deter any would be predators. I looked up at the moonless sky for a while, studying the unfamiliar star patterns as I did most nights when I had the time.

The long walk of the day caught up with me in the form a yawn. I glanced around for my companions. Tzaphiel wandered the edges of the camp, looking up at the moonless sky once in a while. Edgar stood, motionless, off to the side in what I had begun to think of as ‘down time mode’.

“Tzaphiel.” I called quietly; I waited until he looked at me to beckon to him over. “Would you like to hear a story?” At the silent nod I laid back on the ground, pillowing my head with my lumpy pack. I thought about what story to tell Tzaphiel for a moment before deciding to tell him a version of a story I had once read a long time ago.

“Once there was a little girl, Lilly, who lived with her grandfather while her mom and dad were away. Her grandfather was a nice man that loved Lilly with all of his heart. Lilly was allowed to play anywhere in the house she wanted to expect for the basement. The grandfather didn’t want his precious granddaughter to find out that he was a wizard.

One day while Grandfather was away Lilly crept down into the basement to look around. The walls were covered in shelves that were filled with lots of odd and wonderful items. In one corner there was a door. The door had a funny looking mark on it and the air near it was very cold. Far too cold to be natural.

Curious Lilly tugged on to door only to find it moved easily and looked in. At first all she saw was darkness, and then she saw the eyes in the darkness and heard the voices of the things in there. The creatures in the darkness had been locked away for a long time and were hungry as well as very angry with the Grandfather. They grabbed the little girl and began pulling her into the darkness with them, so they could take her them back to their home. To eat her or make her one of them I don’t know, monsters are weird like that. One voice spoke up, fighting the others and asked to leave the little girl alone.

The Grandfather came home and hearing Lilly’s cries ran down stairs to help her. The Grandfather gave himself up to the monsters in the darkness to save Lilly.

Much later, after many years had passed. Lilly now lived with her mom and dad; she couldn’t remember the day the monsters had taken her Grandfather. She and her parents thought that the Grandfather had run away for some reason. Lilly had made lots of new friends at school.

One day while looking for a present for one of her friends she found a shop filled with puzzle games of all types. The man that ran the shop seemed familiar in some way but Lilly could not figure out why. She bought the game the man suggested and left, still wondering why the man’s voice and eyes seemed so familiar.

With all of her best friends gathered in one house they read the instructions and began to set up the game. When the first move was made darkness gathered in the room and sucked them all into it.” I smiled at the intent expression on Tzaphiel’s cute face. A yawn forced its way out as I started to go on with the story.

“Mmm, perhaps I’ll save the rest for another night. It is a very long story after all, and I am tired. I’ll tell you a bit of the story each night until it’s done.” Drawing the small blanket I had over me I rolled on to my side and let my mind drift.

[Angel Under Glass]

Tzaphiel’s wide eyes squeezed shut sadly as Kahlina called a temporary end to the tale. Despite his confusion over the meaning of some words, he understood. More so, he wanted to know what happened next. ‘Monster’ was a foreign concept, and therefore not frightening in the least. The dark creatures might have just wanted some attention, as he often did when he reached for people.

As he slowly walked away from the sleeping woman’s back, his eyes to the ground, he thought about what creatures might lay in wait in his tower home. He had never felt the need to explore it further than his room and the adjoining balconies. With a nearly silent sniffle, he realized that he might not get the chance. The tower had fallen down. The last he saw, it was broken like Mother’s face had been when she crawled from the water.

Seeking comfort, and finding none as he looked toward Kahlina’s softly breathing form, he cast his eyes to the sky. The stars sparkled for him. His view was unobstructed; their camp was so high. But, he still couldn’t find what he sought. As beautiful as the stars were, they were numerous and bland. There was only one moon. But, tonight, there seemed to be none.

He knew, from his long observations, that the moon liked to grow and shrink. Sometimes, it liked to hide also. When those nights happened, when he felt weak and alone, Grandfather would lay him on his bed and tell him stories. It had been much as Kahlina had just done for him. But, Grandfather’s stories were better. They were about fantastic places and people and, sometimes, far stranger things. He told the stories so well that Tzaphiel knew everything that he wanted to know about them. Never once had he been filled with the longing to meet those people and visit those places. There would be nothing new, after all.

Sadly, he retraced his steps over the hard ground until he was once more standing near Kahlina. She didn’t seem to notice him, and the firelight showed that she didn’t even bother opening her eyes. The boy sighed, a small bird-like sound. She had left him with questions that needed answers, but no easy way to find them. They felt far away, farther than the rocky and forested horizons that were merely black spaces devoid of stars.

Thank you for trying to be like Grandfather, he thought with a gentle smile as he hugged his chipmunk dragon. In all his musings, he had forgotten that it was still slung over his shoulder. Tenderly, he took it in his hands and gave it a kiss on top of the head as sweetly as Mother had done for him once upon a time.

Then, with careful movements, he got onto all fours and rolled onto his back next to Kahlina. He made sure to not get very close, for he hadn’t forgotten the old man’s predicament. With eyes wide and darting from star to star, he lay there, slightly tilted to one side as the metal bulk along his spine failed to settle into the unyielding ground.

With imaginings of his old bed dancing in his head, he waited until dawn and thought about the happy day when he could introduce Kahlina to Grandfather and he could show her how to tell a proper story.

[Twisted Infinitum]

She’s such a good mother, Calico mused peacefully within Edgar’s head.

Through the whole course of the story, he had stood silently at the edge of their rocky camp. An approaching person might think that he was a sentry, not knowing how pitiful his combat, or even observation, skills were. Kahlina’s tale didn’t cause even the faintest glimmer of thought in his mind. It was just more words that weren’t orders, and therefore unimportant.

It was the lack of words that caused him to raise his head, just to make sure he wasn’t being left behind. Kahlina was unmoving. Tzaphiel was antsy. He paced around the camp with his head tilted back and his black on black eyes searching.

Hm… I wonder why he likes the sky so much, the dream demon said thoughtfully as if the calm bedtime ritual had truly affected her. He doesn’t sleep like a normal boy, either. I thought that maybe he was having so much fun with the animal parts last night that he forgot to, but he doesn’t seem tired.

Edgar caught his master’s tone and braced himself for movement, should she order him to investigate whatever it was that she was curious about. She almost said something else, but stopped when Tzaphiel gave his new toy a kiss and lay down next to Kahlina. From the way he lowered himself, it was clear that his cloak concealed something bulkier than you would find on a normal boy’s back. His master’s sense of curiosity mounted higher, causing him to tighten springs in his wooden side. There would undoubtedly be an order now.

Calico sighed, Aww, he’s laying on his back. We can check later. I guess he really was tired from playing with you all last night.

Edgar vibrated with readiness to serve, and found nothing but another meaningless mass of words. His wooden joints creaked incrementally, as close as he could approximate to twitches, and his gooey side gave off a faint hum like supersonic gelatin.

I guess… Calico began, oblivious to how intently Edgar listened, You should lay down with them. It’ll be cute!

Edgar jolted forward with both the force of mechanical physics and what little elation he could muster. In noisy, creaky bounds, he arrived next to them and flattened himself to the hard ground next to Tzaphiel. It sounded like he had broken something, but he just stared up at the sky, once again in his pleasant, thoughtless state of mind.

Calico giggled in his head, but he couldn’t, nor did he care to, determine if she was actually surprised or had been playing with him the whole time.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Slowly I became aware that the dreamless drifting of my mind had changed. No longer was I unaware of anything, instead I looked down on a scene unfolding below me. I was with a start that I realized I watched my best friend Amanda. She spoke to an impossible creature, a unicorn of pure white coat, mane and tail, the eyes gleamed a dull red in the moonlight. Shouting at her to leave and run, I found my words couldn’t reach her. Was this only a dream, or was this more? Why was I seeing my friend after all this time with a creature and a setting that could only be found in Althanas?

A dull sound, a muffled thump. As if the sound reached me through countless layers of cotton pulled me form my thoughts. I looked on in astonishment as Manda beheaded the beautiful creature. The blood that stained the blade and her hand gleamed wetly and black in the moonlight.

“Manda!” I called, shocked. That one word carried an odd quality; it resonated in the still air for a moment before fading away. Below me, as everything began to blur and fade away, I saw Manda look up as if trying to find something. I struggled against the force that pulled me back, calling out to my friend again. Only when the strain was great enough that I was instinctively afraid that I would sever some half felt link and be lost that I stopped fighting.

~~~~~~
The jolt of being pulled back into my sleeping body woke me partly. For a moment, I lay there, wondering at the wetness that coated my cheeks. Details of the odd dream slowly drifted back. Mentally shrugging, I scooted closer to Tzaphiel and resolved to talk to my resident dream demoness. Did Manda actually kill a unicorn? Why? The lingering thought drifted through my mind before sleep pulled me back into its comforting grasp swiftly.

~~~~~
Morning came early; in the high pass, the bright rays of sunlight were inescapable as they sought without pity to pierce my eyelids. Grumbling under my breath I rolled over and found I rolled into something, someone. Blinking and rubbing away the sleep in the corners of my eyes, I propped myself up on an elbow and looked down at Tzaphiel.

The little guy looked a little uncomfortable, lying there so stiffly. After a moment his black eyes met mine and I smiled at him.

“Morning. Sleep well?” It was then that I noticed Edgar lying on the far side of Tzaphiel. I wondered if he had laid down on his own or if Calico had ordered him to. That thought spawned others. I wondered if Edgar ever acted on his own or if he was what he looked like, a mindless puppet.

“Good morning Edgar. Calico, morning to you too.” Better safe than sorry, and it never hurts to be nice. Rubbing on my stiff neck, I got up and began packing away my things. Seeing the long cold embers of the fire, I sighed and pulled out a dried ration. I killed the half hearted, wistful thought of a proper breakfast before it fully formed. As I nibbled on the dry traveling biscuit and dried meat, I looked at the first of the stones Perth had given us. The image of a white snake glimmered in the smooth face of the stone. On second glance I saw that it was actually a lizard, it was in a dark place. After several moments of squinting to see the image better, I finally made out the rock walls. A albino lizard and a cave then.

“Okay, are we ready to head out guys? We need to find a cave; our first animal will be there.”

[Angel Under Glass]

Edgar’s actions surprised Tzaphiel for a moment. Expectantly, he stared sideways at the gummy side of Edgar’s face, but there was no explanation there. It seemed that the strangely made man was just copying him. Perhaps Edgar was equally curious about the lay down habits of people like Kahlina.

When Kahlina sluggishly moved closer to him, he was surprised again. But, it was more potent, and more frightening. Her eyes were still closed, the motion of her chest slow. So, she wasn’t going to yell at him… yet. Tzaphiel contemplated inching away from her before she noticed how close he was. He managed a shift of a few inches before his back scraped against the rock and caused her to twitch. It seemed clear, then, that his wisest course of action was to lay as still as possible until she moved away of her own accord.

Sunlight filled the rocky outcroppings around them like honey dripping from the sky, finding Tzaphiel stock still and nervous. Occasionally, he made a careful sideways glance to check that she wasn’t showing signs of anger. The old man certainly had received a lot of it, and it seemed to happen quickly.

Finally, Kahlina did something. She rolled over, bumping into him, and seemed to return to her senses. Tzaphiel avoided eye contact at first, hoping that he looked innocent. When she didn’t say anything, he let his gaze slide to her. Her cheerful greeting wasn’t what he expected. It made him smile with so much relief that his smooth face might have cracked. Once again, she seemed like her lively self as she began moving about the dead embers of their campfire.

As she went about her morning rituals, Tzaphiel rolled onto his stomach. The movement brought him shoulder to shoulder with Edgar, whom he shot a wide grin to as if to say, “It’s ok.” The life-size doll wasn’t any more pleased or distraught than usual, so Tzaphiel righted himself and left Edgar to muse over the night’s revelations.

When he looked back to Kahlina, he saw that she was placing something in her mouth. It was bigger than the insidious stones of earlier, so large that she had to use her teeth to break it. Strangely, she didn’t seem bothered. Tzaphiel cocked his head to the side thoughtfully as he remembered that the stone hadn’t bothered her either. He and Kahlina seemed to be different in many ways. The idea didn’t bother him. It just made him want to stay with her and protect her from whatever faults her nature brought about.

In a gesture of that kinship, he walked up to her and waited, keeping his eyes pointedly away from the food, until she was ready to leave. His hand hovered out of his cloak, protective and needy at the same time.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

As I finished my morning meal, I watched Tzaphiel out of the corner of my eye. By now, I had figured out that the little guy didn’t eat or sleep. Nor did he seem to need shoes. I wondered what he ran on, what forms of energy he used to fuel his body. I mentally ticked off a list in my head of what he could be. Vampire. Nope, it’s daytime and the only thing sucking on my blood is the damned misquotes. Incubus, he’s a little young for sex…. I started chuckling at that last thought. For now, I broke off in my speculation.

I shoved the stone with the lizard’s image in my pocket, rumpled up Tzaphiel’s hair before I dropped a kiss on the top of his head and stood, shouldering my pack. I took the offered hand and heading towards the island’s interior. The lack of uneven thumping steps drew my attention back towards the camp. Edgar still lay on the ground where I had spotted him upon awakening. I shook my head and headed back for him.

“Hey lazy bones, we’re burning daylight. It’s time to go.” Suppressing the girlish squeal of distaste as my fingers sank into Edgar’s gooey side I helped him roll over and sit up, then pulled him to a standing position.

“Come on.” With Edgar’s gummy hand in my left hand and Tzaphiel’s small one in my right, we headed down the gentle slope cut into the mountain.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With only a short brake for lunch and to rest a few minutes, we pressed on, following the curved of the mountains. Several times, I checked the image in the stone. Each time it showed the same white lizard in a dark cave. A lizard in a cave. That’s as helpful as trying to figure out whom killed a person with out any forensic evidence and a blind witness. I really do hope that sheer dumb luck is on our side this trip.

The sun had disappeared behind the tall jagged mountains, leaving the cool shadows to creep slowly across the forest we walked through. Often I wondered how much time we had left of daylight and just often I cursed my dislike of wristwatches. As the afternoon progressed, our paced had slowed, my legs ached and I was tired. Surprisingly, Tzaphiel seemed to be tiring too. I guess the kid isn’t the energizer bunny after all.

Unsure of how much distance we had to cover before we would find the cave in the image, or any cave for that matter. I kept our path as close to the base of the mountains as possible. In the back of my mind, I was slightly surprised that given our gradually slowing rate of walking we had actually managed to walk beyond sight of the pass.

I cursed and stopped to sit on a large rock as the toes of one foot curled painfully in a cramp. After, with no success, stamping my foot repeatedly to end the cramp I stripped off my shoe and carefully massaged the cramping muscles in the arch of my foot. Gradually the tense muscles loosened and I gratefully wiggled my toes before replacing my sock and shoe.

“I don’t know about you two, but I’m ready to stop for the day. We can set up camp over…” I trailed off as I realized that by dumb luck I had found a cave. The rock I was perched upon was just to the left of the opening. I could feel my cheeks flush bright red with embarrassment as I realized that I had walked past the opening. Perhaps someone is listening. I should make a effort to be a lot more polite, just incase.

“I guess we will be camping in the cave tonight. Hopefully, it will have one of the lizards we need. We will explore the cave in the morning, for now we need to set up camp. Edgar, can you see if there is fresh water anywhere near here?”

[Twisted Infinitum]

If Kahlina hadn’t been so helpful, Edgar might not have joined them. It was an even greater testament to her kindness that she put up with his stuttering stride that almost brought his wooden right foot down on her heels as she pulled him along behind her. Calico might have had a compliment for that if she wasn’t oblivious to the entire situation.

She had just finished her work upon a dozen Catholic Priests, all residing in one of the many indifferentiable worlds where that particular religion had caught on. The particulars of their nightmares were disturbing, to say the least, and even the dream demon seemed to shed her memories of what exactly she had sent them. However, she could be sure of the result. At this very moment, every one of them was throwing themselves bodily into the nearest basins of holy water while screaming something to the extent of, “Impure bunnies! Bunnies are the devil!” Most of them were going to attack anyone who tried to interrupt their cleansing, and word would just grow from there. It would be bigger than an image of the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast!

Calico’s work and subsequent gloating took her to the moment when Kahlina spoke about making camp. She turned to Edgar’s bubble, the view within darkening with dusk, and was about to squeal something approving when Kahlina made a request of the puppet. Water? she asked blankly while her feline features tightened in thought. After a second, her eyes widened, Oh! Drinky drinky water. Searching time, Edgar sweety! She excitedly pumped a fist in the air.

So did Edgar, but his wooden arm made an unpleasant grinding sound with the sudden motion. Apparently unharmed, he turned from Kahlina and continued down their path of travel with his arm frozen over his head in an unending salute.

He had walked for quite a while by the time that Calico noticed the problem and coached him in the proper method of appendage retrieval. The sun was nearly set by then, though the shadow of the mountain made it seem far later. Edgar’s eye was having trouble in the twilight. Everything he looked at was rock, naturally, so it easily blended to become a great vertical surface that seemed to rise on either side of the path he walked.

His creator wasn’t much help with directions or detection as she rambled to herself. We should have asked her how fresh? Ice chilled? Bottled? Carbonated? There’s so many options for water these days, and I don’t see any concession stands. To prove her point, she gave the image in Edgar’s bubble a thorough scan, and finally saw something. It wasn’t a concession stand, but it certainly sparkled like water.

At his master’s directions, the puppet toddled off the path and crawled into the rocky outcroppings that looked like petrified toffee; pre-chewed. The sparkle came from a rather deep impression that was just ahead of him, though still a struggle to reach. When he finally did, he halted at a delayed command, his upper body already submerging in the pool. It was clearly old water, gritty and brown, only held there so long by the lack of natural drainage.

Congratulations! Calico squealed, but her mood quickly dropped when she analyzed the water’s condition. Um… let’s tell her it’s chocolate water, she offered uncertainly. Edgar’s dream half agreed with a low gurgle. That brought the smile back to Calico’s face, and she approached the next problem with renewed gusto. Now, what to carry it in… she mused happily, then chirped excitedly when the answer came to her. Edgar, sweety. Could you please take off your woody arm?

The creak of gears and wood that echoed from the mountainside seemed painfully loud in the dusk silence.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

“Where was I? Oh yeah, I remember now. While everyone was setting up the game to play, each person made a tiny doll of themselves and a card representing their fear to use in the game. When they were at last done, Lilly took the first roll. As the dice touched the board, darkness filled the room and sent everyone to sleep.

Lilly was the first to awaken. Around her, all of her friends but one lay on the ground. Katie was missing. Once everyone woke up and began searching the room for the lost girl, they found that none of them could open the doors. They were trapped inside the room.

Out of thin air and with no warning another person appeared in the room with them. Recognizing the man as the one that had sold the game to her, Lilly stepped back to the tight group her friends had formed. Questions and threats flew from the group as each one tried to find out what had happened. Where they were and where the missing girl, Katie, was.

Mocking and laughing at them, the man introduced him self as Julian. Only hinting at what he wanted as his prize Julian told them that they were all players in his game. They were to play for their lives. If they could confront and defeat each of their fears and escape the house by the stroke of midnight then they bothered no longer. If not, then they became his to play with forever.” I looked up to see Tzaphiel’s face, to see if my story was gaining his interest or if I should try another. His thoughtful, involved expression was enough for me.

“As quickly as Julian had appeared he disappeared. With his departure the door leading farther into the house opened of it's own accord. With no other choice, ans much arguing, everyone shuffled through the door." For a moment I paused and wondered if 'shuffled' had been the right the word to use. Perhapswalking would have been better... or a conga line. Unbidden a picture formed in my head. A line of tiny people moving, their hands on the person in front of them. All of them singing 'We are going to die here! We are going to die here!' Rather than smile at the silly image I bit on my lower lip and shook my head slightly, it's not as if Tzaphiel would have known what a conga line was. On with the story...

"On the other side, Lilly found herself in a long hallway decorated in dark gaudy colors, and alone. Behind her, the door swung shut leaving her with no choice but to move forward.

Scared, Lilly headed down the long hall to the first door. She hesitated, not wanting to open the door. The thought that Katie, who was like a little sister to everyone, could be behind that door just as scared and alone as Lilly herself was spurned her to open the it and walk in.

“Lilly found herself in a large clearing in the middle of a nighttime forest. To her right, near the trees Lilly spotted one of her friends, Amber, being lead away by several young men. Calling to her friend, Lilly caught up with her and the men. She allowed herself to be pulled along with Amber. Minutes later they stood before a large opening in the ground. The men called down into the hole in an unknown language. Lilly exchanged an uncertain glance with Amber. From the hole, pale creatures emerged. At first glance, they were lovely, but then Lilly began to notice that all bore some twisted feature; a tail on one, cloven hooves on another. Lilly shrieked along with Amber as both were pushed into the hole by the men, they fell past the creatures and down into the darkness.

Once again, Lilly woke up; she was a little surprised that she was not hurt. Next to her, Amber crouched, her normally perfectly coiffed hair now in disarray. Around them several of the creatures stood, waiting silently. Once Lilly stood up, both her and Amber were herded further into the caves. They were lead to a beautiful crystalline structure and separated. Lilly struggled to break away from the group pulling her along and reach Amber, she was afraid of being separated and being alone.

“After being forced into a room, Lilly found herself waiting what seemed like hours in an empty chamber. Just as she began worrying about the time, one of the walls opened to allow a person into the room. At first Lilly did not recognize the person, but once she saw the distinctive electric blue eyes the man had she knew him to be Julian.

The conversation with Julian was short, vague and bizarre. The only thing Lilly really learned was Julian had set up the whole thing to capture her. Lilly threw the silver rose Julian had given her away once she realized that Julian only touched her where the rose had touched her. After Julian left, Lilly considered stomping the rose to bits but decided against it. Instead, she tested the walls, eventually finding a section that opened for her.

Meeting no resistant in the dimly lit halls, Lilly found amber in no time. Amber was huddled in the corner of one chamber, her face stained with tears. It took several minutes of talking and cajoling for Lilly to get Amber on her feet and angry enough for her to be able to over come her horror of the little creatures. Hand in hand, they walked out of the chamber, and found themselves in the hall once again. At their feet lay a card, on it was the drawing that Amber had done for her fear.

“Together they faced the next door, inside they found another hall, identical to the first one. They found the door behind them firmly shut and locked. Wandering up the hall, came Dillon. Once they spotted one another all three rushed to meet each other. Lilly smiled and looked away, little the two lovebirds have a moment.

At a strangled gasp Lilly turned around to see Amber staring at Dillon in horror as something green and moss like spread across Dillon’s hand and fore arm. Lilly was forced to hold Dillon down when he began to rip and tear at the moss like plant growing on his skin. The moss was so firmly connected the skin around it began to bleed when the moss was pulled upon. Thinking on her feet Lilly left Amber to keep Dillon from hurting himself and grabbed one of the candles that rested in a bracket every so often.

Carefully Lilly moved the flame close to the plant like growth on Dillon. Lilly was surprised to find that the moss died easily. In the end, she covered both arms, his chest, feet and had to singe a bit of hair to remove all of the plant growth from Dillon.

As the last of the plant fell to the carpet the door Lilly and Amber had used to enter opened of its own accord. Outside the door, the trio found Dillon’s card. It bore the drawing of a green leafy creature with human arms and legs sprouting from it.” I stretched, feeling my spine pop in several places and sighed.

“That’s it for tonight, kiddo. Lilly can rescue everyone else tomorrow night. I should probably apologize, I’m not much of a story teller.” I glanced out towards the opening, wondering where Edgar was for a moment. Shrugging, I dismissed the twinge of worry. It’s not like he is edible or in anger. I’m sure Calico wouldn’t truly allow Edgar to be ripped into shreds. I suddenly remembered reading about Edgar being catapulted into the middle of a enemy tent, following Chromannon. Frowning, I fought eyes that were getting increasingly heavy and settled in comfortably to watch the cave opening for him.

[Angel Under Glass]

Tzaphiel watched Kahlina’s body for a long time, still and droopy eyed. He couldn’t remember the story very well. Every name except for Lilly’s had flitted away from his mind. He understood, at the least, that she was in danger. Grandfather’s stories hadn’t been so dangerous. They never made him worry. Maybe Kahlina was getting better… a little. But, he couldn’t decide. All he could think about was familiar things that seemed far away. All except one.

With slow, plodding steps, he walked outside. The starry sky greeted him over the swell of bare earth. Urgently, he scanned it. It hadn’t occurred to him earlier what the strange feeling, the reason that he had been feeling weak and slow since afternoon, was because he missed something. But, it wasn’t in tonight’s sky either. His silver hair fluttered about as he searched more frantically, hoping to catch it should it be hiding just behind his head. If it was, he wouldn’t be able to see it. The rock wall that Kahlina lay in was high and steep, almost as steep as his tower’s walls. It blocked almost half of the sky. Under the dark, imposing stone face, Tzaphiel made a low whimper, and his heavy eyelids squeezed shut.

Nothing was familiar anymore.

Suddenly, though almost in a blurry haze, he thought of the story. Lilly had been all alone too, and she went forward to get away from it. Always forward. Tzaphiel’s eyes opened above a stern, though trembling, mouth. He would go forward too.

He made his way back into the cave, skirted Kahlina’s motionless form, and walked into the darkness. His feet felt heavy as if they bore weights, but Lilly had faced trouble too. She would save everyone, Kahlina had said, so that must have meant that she would eventually get out. He would too. If he kept going straight, he would come out the other side of the mountain. The other half of the sky, and the moon’s light, was waiting there.

Without the sun or stars or people, time seemed to stand still. Everything was dark, darker than the tower had ever been. But, Tzaphiel felt his way forward desperately, if not bravely. It was a world of hard, rough shapes. Some of them scrapped him or forced him to fumble about for any small opening. His footsteps sounded again and again, bouncing off the walls until he felt like an army digging through the earth. The sounds seemed so powerful and rapid that he didn’t notice his own feet slowing. Gradually, almost comfortably, his mind sped through the blackness, all noise and speed, while his body staggered and came to a heavy stop amid the severely angled rock faces.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

I woke to darkness, the fire long burned down to sullen embers. Muttering a curse under my breath I sat up and rubbed at my ribs as they protested the stony floor and thanked me for sitting up. Did anyone get the license plate number of the truck… I chuckled at my own thought. Night blind, my fingers quested for the small pile of wood I knew to be near by. I found the first piece by tearing a cuticle against the knotty wood. Hissing in a breath I carefully grabbed the wood and put in the fire pit, poking the embers near the chunk of wood. Several minutes later the first tentative flames licked at the wood, shedding light.

“There we are. Why did you guys let…” I trailed off, as I realized I was alone. With the stone walls of the cave surrounding me I couldn’t tell how long I has slept. Losing Edgar didn’t worry me too terribly much. I was sure he was safe, just probably lost or in his down mode somewhere near by. The absence of Tzaphiel on the other hand worried me greatly. The little guy had repeatedly shown his innocence of things. Coupled with his lack speech, or any other noise created a huge problem.

“Tzaphiel? Where are you?” I called as I stood at the entrance of the cave, tugging on one of my well-used shoes. I pushed away the idle thought that I needed to replace them soon. After waiting for a moment I decided it would be best to search the cave first, after walking through the forest the cave would have presented a greater chance for exploration to a curious child. As I passed the fire I snatched up a large burning branch and a second smaller piece of wood.

Within meters of the fire, walking became difficult, clear spaces were few and far in between. I found myself often stepping on the sides and tops of large rock, clinging to the walls and other rocks to maintain my balance. I was worried that I made so much noise that I couldn’t hear anything. If something approached me or Tzaphiel made some noise to help me find him I would be able to hear it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I stood in a tiny patch of clear ground, staring down into the cave, resting my aching ankles and feet. Something at the edge of the fires light gleamed back dully in the flickering light. I couldn’t be sure but I thought it moved. Spurned on by the hope that it was Tzaphiel I hopped up to the nearest secure foot hold and carefully picked my way across the rocks.

As I got near enough to see the object I felt my throat tighten painfully in fear. Tzaphiel lap sprawled awkwardly across the rocks. One small arm had caught in the crevice of a rock, his legs rested on another rock. I couldn’t see his face through the hair that hung in his face. What frightened me the most was a lizard, the same as the one displayed in Perth’s stone clung to a rock near Tzaphiel’s head and tasted the air around the boy.

“You get away from him!” I shrieked. My screams echoed in the small tunnel as the lizard looked up at me and hissed, far to similar to a snake to be comfortable. I picked up a large rock and threw it at the lizard. I only succeeded in making it mad as I hit the rock near it. It hissed a challenge back at me as I shrieked threats and obscenities at it trying to get it away from the unconscious boy.

I reached out to grab something else as I took several more steps towards the lizard, I was a hand span from grabbing Tzaphiel. My hand closed on something wooden and I yanked on it then struck at the lizard, landing a glancing blow, splashing vile smelling water all over the place. The lizard half fell half slid from it’s perch into a small hollow, there it struggled to right itself. I stared at the object in my hand, at the wooden arm. I turned, behind me the odd figure of Edgar stood awkwardly.

“I believe this is yours.” I started to hand the arm back to Edgar, I stopped as I remembered that the lizard was still present. I spun back around and bashed the lizard on the head with Edgar’s arm several times. I was ashamed of the fact that I waited between each blow to see if it would move.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Istraloth chocolate water was rare, especially since it had only been discovered a few hours earlier. However, despite the expected market value, Calico screamed nothing but praise as Kahlina clubbed the lizard while giving it a drink.

Edgar watched with mild interest as the large lizard thrashed about. With each blow, he recognized more of that feeling, that kinship with beings that had so much in common with him; their unthinking, instinctive motion, their dwindling mental capacities. He had seen it before, but it always led to the inevitable still silence of the creature. Tonight, however, the decline stopped short. The woman had beaten the animal into a drooling, senseless state, but it was still alive with twitches and breaths that betrayed its desire and capability to move. Of his own accord, the puppet stepped closer to the battered animal. The exposed gears in his shoulder spun and whined as they tried to move an arm that wasn’t there.

With the grisly work complete, Kahlina finally offered Edgar his missing limb, though he only accepted it because his master saw it at the side of his vision and ordered him to. His gummy hand gripped the appendage and pressed it forcefully against the socket, which produced a scream of metal as the pieces grazed off of each other. Feeling the lack of contact, he pulled his eye from the lizard and looked at the battered end of the arm. Wood had splintered inward from the damaged area and lay among the gears like striking laborers. It didn’t even occur to him to clean out the appendage. He simply tried again, using as much force as his gummy side could muster. With the pop and crunch of wood, he meshed the gears amid a slow shower of splinters.

Calico’s congratulations filled his head, then her question of, Is the mean lizard thingy dead?

Edgar cranked out the word, “Dead?”, as he lifted his wooden arm to point. It moved so shakily and with such a horrible grinding that, when his finger pointed at Tzaphiel instead of the lizard, it could have been misinterpreted as mechanical failure. However, this was one of the rare instances that Edgar’s brain sparkled with a semblance of thought. The lizard was alive. He knew because the pleasurable vision of decline still lay, making a gurgling snore, amid the rocks. The boy, on the other hand, was not showing any signs of life at all. The chest didn’t rise. The limbs didn’t twitch. A hint of disappointment stirred in Edgar’s mind, strangely more than just regret at missing the boy’s fall into his current state.

Oh no! Calico screeched as Tzaphiel came into view in the bubble. She hadn’t noticed his form under the battle of woman versus cave lizard. Edgar! Check his pulse!

The puppet’s pointing hand creaked forward to find out what a ‘pulse’ was, then check it.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Panting, I stood there for a long moment. The sounds nerve scraping sounds of Edgar replacing his arm mostly ignored. My actions of the last few minutes were vaguely hazy as if I hadn't had control over my self. Inwardly I cursed at the effects of adrenaline and the whole fight or flight reaction. Damn genetics. Why couldn't the human race evolve more useful mechanisms? I pursued these thoughts sourly.

"'...Dead?'" Edgar's words pulled me from my silent musings. I looked up and followed the scarred wooden arm to Tzaphiel's unmoving form. I could feel my eyes widen and time slow as I stilled, holding my breath while I stared at the boy and waited for him to move, to breathe.

Edgar's questing hand, reaching for the boy, suddenly seemed like a threat. Bounding forward I slapped at the wooden hand, bruising several fingers for my trouble. Unconsciously nimble I hopped from rock to rock, crossing the foot or two that separated Tzaphiel and I. Carefully, I righted the limbs caught and turned him over. Something in my chest tightened at the sight of the lax, smooth expression on Tzaphiel's face.

I found myself chanting under my breath, saying no over and over again as I scooped up his little body. I felt no movement of his chest, no breathing no heartbeat. Tears gathered in my eyes, blinding me, misty and stinging as I held on to Tzaphiel fiercely.


Just as I began to morn the lost of a life so young. One that I had begun to view as a little brother or perhaps a sort of son the head that dangled over my arm at a awkward angle shifted, pulling itself up and laying on my shoulder. Relief flooded though me despite that fact that, that simple movement was it. Nothing else was shifted or moved. Blinking away the salty droplets that clung willfully to my eyelashes I laid my cheek against Tzaphiel's forehead and cursed myself for being a fool. I had noticed oddities about the child, why had I not realized that he didn't breathe?

"He's okay guys. I think he's just knocked out, but he's okay." Smiling like a fool, I looked up at Edgar and through him, Calico. The soft, buzzsaw snarl of a snore from the beaten lizard finally intruded into my awareness. I glanced at the lizard and was tempted to wack the lizard once more just to ease my mind and have a bit of revenge for the worry it had put me through. Instead I shifted Tzaphiel, supporting him with one arm and a hip as I dug through a pocket for the first of the stones Perth had given us.

Once found it was a simple matter to drop the stone on the lizard. With no theatrics, no flash of light, or boom of displaced air the lizard simply disappeared once the stone struck it's exposed stomach. I shook my head and hoped that Perth wouldn't be too angry with us to sending him a battered creature, after all he had wanted a live one. It will live. Unfortunately.

"Come on Edgar, lets get back to camp. I can try and fix your arm once we get back."

[Twisted Infinitum]

Calico sat before the Edgar bubble with her knees hugged to her chest and her head craned forward. It was the same pose that Edgar had adopted as he gently poked one gummy finger at Tzaphiel's cheek. Oooooh, I get it, Calico announced. It had taken her a while, the entire journey back to the cave mouth campsite to be exact. Zafie's a constructy... thing! Just like you, honey. That's what grabby-house guy was talking about when he said Zafie was well made. I thought he was just one of those weirdos who are into little boys.

Edgar continued poking, taking care to avoid the open, glassy, obsidian eyes of the child. He had already been scolded once for poking too close, and it was only because of his current unarmed state that he was even allowed to try waking the boy. His wooden arm of uncontrolable crushing death was safely on the other side of the camp fire, specifically in Kahlina's lap as she tried to clean the wood chips out of it. It was quite a noisy process, not because of the deformed gears, but because of the constant vulgarities that she spit across the fire. You'll have to get her to clean up her language before you guys have kiddies, Edgar's master cheerfully told him.

He just kept staring at Tzaphiel's face, waiting for the slight twitches that had been happening sporadically as if he were trying to look around, though all their was to see was the eerily lit stone ceiling. It was odd how he seemed even more lifeless than the dying creatures Edgar was so curious about, yet he was kept safe while the dead things had always been thrown away. Maybe the boy was going through a reversal of that process, which meant that, if Edgar waited long enough, he would see when Tzaphiel rose to the state of twitchy, struggling near-death. In the depths of his gummy brain, there was his first twinge of hopeful expectation. Not as impressive as first steps, mind you, but still important.

"Clean up kiddies," Edgar finally croaked as his mind left the blazing treadmill of sub-par rationalizations and acknowledged his master's words.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

The gears within the wooden arm I held were deceptively simple. I wondered how the arm was used so well. I snorted to myself, holding back a chuckled. Used so well? I’m surprised it works at all now that I think about it. It must have something to do with Calico’s influence. With the point of the small blade on the swiss army knife I poked and prodded until the pieces of wood were removed from all of the gears in the arm and shoulder, and from my fingers.

The garbled, clicking words that Edgar suddenly said earned him a suspicious look after I looked from Tzaphiel to the opening of the cave and around us. Clean up? Kiddies? Clean up what kiddies? Tzaphiel was clean. Well he might have a smudge or two from his fall earlier but other than that and his grubby little feet he was fine. Shaking my head I laid the wooden arm within Edgar’s reach and headed for Tzaphiel. I drew the small boy close to me, as if I was sharing my body heat with him when I was actually protecting him from everything. Especially curious gummy and wooden fingers that liked to poked eyes.

“Edgar, I’m going to get some sleep. Please stay here in the camp and keep an eye out for anything dangerous. We’ll be heading out for the squirrel thingy that’s in the next rock in the morning.” At least I think it’s a squirrel. Well, it kind of looks like one. Man, Althanas has some weird things in it. I fussed and grumbled under my breath for a moment longer before making sure that Tzaphiel was as comfortable as he could be with a bunch of metal in his back.

“Oh, Calico. We should hook up sometime, come visit me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Morning came too early in the cave. Huffing under my breath I rolled over to escape the sunlight and rolled into something that gave slightly. Propping one eye open I studied the thing that was pressed up against my nose. Cloth. Wait, cloth? Tzaphiel! I sat up and checked on the little guy. I felt a pang of worry and disappoint as he seemed the same. Hopefully I prodded his should then shook him gently.

“Tzaphiel? Hey kiddo, when are you going to wake up?” Discouraged, I dug into my pack and quickly ate the first edible thing I grabbed without really tasting it. Carefully I scooped up Tzaphiel, the metal making him an awkward, but light bundle to carry.

“Edgar, if you could carry my pack I’d be grateful.” I smiled at Edgar. For some reason I feel like singing that stupid song that the dwarves in Snow White sang while they were digging. I glanced back at Edgar, wondering if Calico had taken me up on my offering and had visited me while I was sleeping. It was easier to blame a weird and childish urge on a forgotten dream and dream visitor than admit to my own quirks of insanity.

“Okay, in the pic of the squirrel I saw trees and I think a mountain. So we are heading up into the trees on the mountains. I hope I’m right about this.”

[Twisted Infinitum]

As they left the craggy, lower passes of the mountain and entered the sun-bathed, forested heights, Edgar walked behind Kahlina with unusually stable strides. It could have been that he had accrued enough walking experience to reach the next level, as his master had said upon congratulating him. But, it was actually Tzaphiel that drove him. He could see the sleek plume of silver hair over Kahlina's elbow, barely visible, and that was it. If Tzaphiel returned to life now, he might miss seeing it.

Unbeknownst to her, Calico was doing a decent job of keeping the curiosity from getting dangerous and pokey. Edgar, as instructed, was raising and lowering his wooden arm to her count that would make an aerobics instructor on crack seem unenthusiastic. Hopefully, Kahlina didn't have anything too breakable in her pack, because it jostled up and down the flailing wooden bicep as if a wild animal were trying to escape from within. The entire act looked like a seizure and sounded like a sawmill, and it thankfully only lasted an hour before Calico grew bored.

Afternoon came, and so did the trees, but it was all washed out by the glare of the naked sunlight. At least, that was the view from Calico's side. Careful, sweety, she warned as she squinted into the bubble, You're getting very close to the sun, now. Make sure you don't melt. Dream Edgar grunted and jiggled suddenly, to which she put a hand on his squishy cranium and cooed, There there. It'll be ok. Just stay hydrated!

The view in Edgar's bubble had suddenly shifted from Kahlina's back to the treetops, and he grunted again, this time with more spittle. Finally, Calico understood. Despite the glare that she had been picking up from the angle of the sun and the refraction index of his eye, he had seen something up there. Good job! she cheered, You've got the eye of an eagle. A bald one. She rubbed his head again. Stay on target!

Edgar did, though his head was already cranked back as far as the wooden ball joint would allow. The branches above him shook again, and a dark, rectangular shape shot through the air between them. With his gummy hand, he pointed straight up, offsetting the balance only barely achieved by his heels. As he fell back, he barked loudly and in a raspy, grating tone, "Eagle one, on target!" Then, he crashed heavily upon the leafy path with Kahlina's pack miraculously unharmed below his arm instead of crushed under his shoulder. "Edgar down," he clicked at a condolence given from above.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

My arms and back ached while my shoulders screamed in protest of the little bundle I carried in my arms. It was hard carrying him over a rocky terrain, let alone trying to climb up the said terrain. Tzaphiel didn’t weigh much but given enough time, and marching. Yes I couldn’t forget marching. He became something that felt like lead and weighed a ton. The odd metal bar I had discovered to be embedded in his back had long ago caused a lack of feeling in my left arm. The fingers that clinched his shoulder were mottled white, red and purple. I wasn’t entirely sure if I should be alarmed or not, but I wasn’t willing to set the little guy down. Not for his sake but for mine. I just knew my arm was going to hurt like hell once the blood got properly circulating once more.

The only alternate means I had of distracting myself from worrying over the state of my hand was the unending noise from Edgar. I was certain that the racket he caused was going to chase away the odd little critter we were currently looking for. The feel of feathers and scales against my skin startled me, I looked down at the small bundle I carried and spotted the hideous thing Tzaphiel had acquired at Perth’s. Taking in the serpentine body distorted with a dove’s wing, a raven’s wing, a single cat’s claw on the end and a chipmunk’s head I cringed and wondered just how it had gotten there. I could have sworn that it was not around Tzaphiel’s waist before I slept yet now it was draped over him, the claw held firmly in the mouth.

To distract myself from the growing urge to turn around and yell at the puppet and the disturbing thoughts of Tzaphiel’s ‘toy’ I started counting in my head, ticking away the seconds. I reached four thousand, six hundred and ninety two when Edgar suddenly ceased his racket and spoke. Eagle one on target? Someone has crept into way to many young boys’ heads and watched the dreams of being a fighter pilot.

“Calico, lay off the Top Gun movie quotes.” I said then instantly regretted my short tone. Don’t piss off the dream demon. Don’t piss off the dream demon with delusions of godhood. I could feel my shoulders tense up on their own as I followed the path that Edgar’s arm point out. If the next words that came out of Edgar’s mouth sounded even remotely huffy I was so not sleeping tonight.

A scrabbling sound from the trees above me, only a little off from where Edgar pointed, drew my attention. Staring up into the foliage, I had to circle around a few steps before I finally spotted the squirrel like animal. I stared at the bright orange fur of the animal and wondered how it survived with fur that color. It screamed target. Eyeing the tree it was in, I carefully laid Tzaphiel near Edgar.

“Keep him safe and don’t poke him Edgar.” I whispered through clenched teeth as I rubbed my suddenly tingling arm.

Once the pins and needles sensation had mostly faded and I could once again feel my fingers moving, I slowly crept up tot the tree and reached for the lowest branch. Yeah, this is going to work about as well as a snowball’s chance in hell. Several branches up, I refused to look back down at the ground, my old fear of heights had returned with a vengeance.

Wriggling my nose to relieve an itch as I was not about to let go of the branch I clung too, I stared at the brightly colored animal and met shiny brown eyes that looked distinctly amused. Laugh it up furball, you’re going on a trip. Throwing caution aside as well as common sense, I lunged at the creature in a foolish attempt to grab it. I felt the coarse fur brush my fingertips as it launched itself into the air in a daredevil jump that made my lunge look like nothing.

Branches scored a few hits as I fell out of the tree. Winded and gasping, I watched the critter drift to a near by tree and disappear into the foliage.

“It frickin flies! Why are we chasing a flying squirrel? ” I shouted as soon as I had enough air in my lungs to vocalize the phrase that had been racing circles in my mind for the last ten or fifteen seconds.

“She doesn’t fly.” Despite my prone position, I whipped my head around and glared at the source of the clicking, gravelly voice.

“I’m well aware that I can’t fly, nor did I try. I fell.” My voice was too airy and wheezing to sound as annoyed as I felt. Grumbling under my breath, I carefully rolled over and pulled myself up to my feet. Looking up at the branch I had fallen from I was a little surprised I hadn’t broken something, but I wasn’t surprised that I now felt like I was seventy.

“How are we supposed to catch something that flies?” I said, more to myself that to my companions.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Edgar, sweety, you don't have to repeat everything I say, Calico gently told him. A mommy-in-law is supposed to stay on good terms with the wifey, that way she'll tell me when you misbehave. A pat on the cheek told Edgar that his master didn't expect much misbehavior. Though, with his half-face as blank as parchment, he hardly seemed in need of reassurance.

Anyway, how do we catch something that flies? Hm... With her chin on her fist and her back hunched, Calico seemed to be thinking intently. The only idea it granted her, after a few minutes, was one both simple and brilliant. At least, she thought so. A net! We need a big net to catch it. But, where can we find one... I know!

~

Edgar suddenly walked toward Kahlina with a great purpose evident in his step. He waved his arms about in preparation, causing her pack to fall from his arm and land near Tzaphiel's prone form. Fortunately, it wasn't an eye poke he was preparing for, and unfortunately, an eye poke might have been less disturbing. With all the grace of a girl bursting from her first giant cake, he grabbed his grubby old cloak and ripped it over his head.

It waved over him like a blank pirate flag, drawing even more attention to that which was suddenly not covered at all. Organs floated in his transparent, squishy side like lazy clouds. They were anatomically correct clouds, crowded and colorful in a display that made most mortals feel really really bad about being mortal.

"Net," he rattled as he thrust it toward her in shakey hands. Even under the tree cover, the sunlight still revealed the numerous small holes in the garment, and only about half of them had been caused by the angry sailors of days past.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

It was with something akin to horror that I watched Edgar's actions, the wooden and gummy body displayed to the light of day to a greater degree than ever before. Automatically I took the much abused cloak as I stared or rather tried not too. Finally, at long last, the old nursing ability kicked in, my horror and disgust faded allowing me to look at Edgar without cringing. I had in my days working for an acute care hospital seen much, much worse but nothing to bizarre.

For a long moment I simply stared and tried to identify the organs floating in the clear jelly of Edgar's body. I wondered if I used the small blade I had to gently cut open Edgar to closer inspect the organs if it would hurt Edgar and if the incisions would close on their own.

"Edgar, if I were back home I know a lot of people that would love to take a look at you." Shoving my morbid curiosity aside for the time being I looked down at the tattered cloak. Just how am I supposed to use this? In order to use a net I'd have to climb back up into a tree. Looking up at the high branches surrounding us I shook my head. No freaking way! I was foolish but not stupid and falling out of a tree once was enough for me.

"God damn it, I'm going to have to climb a tree again aren't I?" I muttered more to myself than to my companions as I looked at both of them. Perhaps if Tzaphiel were awake he'd be willing to scamper up a tree. He wasn't and Edgar could not so it was up to me and it was just great. Absolutely perfect.

"Edgar, stay with Tzaphiel. No poking or squishing him, just make sure nothing comes up and tries to chew on him." I looked at the half wooden man and decided to try to appeal to his protective side, if he had one. "He's ours right now so we can't let anything else have him, right?" Hoping that at least one of the two listening from inside that gummy and wooden head was listening, I walked away, under the trees as silent as possible my head cranked almost painfully back to scan the branches.

There were no tale tale flashes of movement or glimpses of orange fur. Disgruntled I sat down, leaning back against the wide rough trunk of a tree and worried at the hem of Edgar's cloak. Messily I made a fringe and tied in a few small stones that lay about to weigh the edge.

Here's to hoping that something actually goes as expected. Picking my branches out carefully I climbed up into the nearest easily accessible tree. I refused to look down and become frozen in place despite a voice in the back of my head yammering about the distance between the ground and me. Hugging my branch I kept as still as possible and waited.

Patience won a victory as something small rustled the leaves just over my head. Slowly I unwound the dirty cloak from around my arm and swung the weighed end up and over the creature above my head. Immediately I heard a high-pitched cry and felt the cloth jerk in my hands. Standing up and leaning back against the trunk I shimmied the cloth under my squirming prize. As the cloak was drawn around it I heard frantic chittering emanating from the small thrashing bundle.

The battle won and the spoils in hand I looked down and promptly wonder just how I was going to climb down with a cloak full from a writhing critter. I most certainly was not going to exit this tree the same way I had the last one. holding the cloak firmly between my teeth and trying to not taste it I stretched out for the closet branch.

It took a long time to climb down. A steady stream of curses and self directed insults kept me moving even when I looked down and it seemed as if I had hundreds of feet to go still. Jittery with fear and exhilaration my feet touched the ground and I let out a shout of joy. The next minute was spent hopping about like some mad child wired on way too much sugar. I looked up at the trees surrounding me and mental thumbed my nose at them. One fear confronted nine million to go.

Once I reached Edgar and Tzaphiel I sat down near the boy and finally inched open the make shift net to see my prize. Instead of orange fur I saw a thin almost emancipated body covered in dull brown fur. Black eyes, too large for it's small face stared up at me, terrified. I sighed as a pink tongue slipped out and licked the flat black surface of its nose.

"It's not the squirrel thing. It's, it's, I don't know what it is. Well it's cute, in a pathetic sort of way." Carefully I reached into the sack and touched the top of its head. I could feel the tremors that shook its tiny body and gently stroked the head and a velvety feeling ear. I was half surprised that I wasn't bitten. It looks completely terrified, poor little thing.

I think it was the huge black eyes starring out of that fuzzy face that prompted me to keep it and try to tame it.

~~~~~~
By the light of a tiny, sometimes failing fire I watched over Tzaphiel for a moment before looking at the small creature I had for some reason named Nervous, for nervous it was. It sat huddled inside of my now open pack atop my vlince shirt as it shivered continuously. Close to the edge of the pack several dead bugs lay by a stone with a hollow that contained water.

On the far side of the fire Edgar stood, once more swathed in his cloak. Only the glaring orange orb of his eye truly visible. Beyond the small circle of firelight the forest and mountainside was bathed in darkness and faint starlight. I hoped that once the moon rose I'd be able to see more.

[Twisted Infinitum]

During the Great Hunt, Edgar had been the perfect bodyguard, in so much as he hadn't wandered off. He hadn't even spoken, which was odd given the sheer amount of information slamming into his brain from that far away world; everything from, See? Kahlina's from a world where the people want to look at you. They think you're hawt, to Calico's own brand of frantic victory celebration, and equally Calico-esque disappointment.

When night fell and they gathered around the fire, it was with a sense of defeat. So... grand total for the day. Zero critters we need, and one that shakes more than you, the dream demon grumbled.

"Shakes," Edgar said aloud with a nod, his eye bobbing like an overfed firefly in the shadows. He had his cloak back on, much to the relief of all viewing eyes. It did have a slight odor, though, that hadn't been there before. Naturally, neither puppet nor master noticed it, but Calico wouldn't have been surprised that 'Nervous' had voided a few biological systems upon his capture. At least he seemed... comfortable in their company now.

You know what? Calico whispered when the silence of the camp began to grate. I just realized that you and Kahlie-poo never had a honeymoon. Some couples don't, what with a kid so soon in the marriage, and no offence to my little Zaphie-doodle. But, it's kind of sad. Her voice dropped off sorrowfully while Edgar's head ticked curiously to the side with a creak that echoed in the night.

I know! screamed the master, and both of Edgar's eyes, dream and real, bulged momentarily. She said I should visit her in a dream the other night. I didn't just cause I don't like to poke around in the heads of people I love. But, I'm sure she won't mind if I help you guys celebrate. Don't you think she needs it? I mean, her only son's in a coma and she can't catch her squirrel. She needs some cheering up. So, get your cute, gummy butt over there and show her some love!

Edgar stood rigidly and toddled around the dying campfire. Kahlina was already reclining on the ground, and she had a dark, heavy look about her eyes. Therefore, she probably didn't notice, or maybe didn't care, when he lay down next to her and draped his gummy arm across her midsection. "Gummy love," he rattled softly in her ear while his fingers twitched ineffectually in the air.

~

The scene: 1975. The music was far out, the lighting psychodelic, and every teenage boy was The Man in the club, on the prowl for the jivin' bunnies. That was the crowd surrounding Calico, all coated in bright colors and as much glitter as the disco ball above. Oh, and paisley, so much. It wasn't just for the girls in those days. One guy even had a full, startlingly white suit that only showed a puff of dark hair above it as he looked out over the ladies and tapped his foot to the beat of the approaching music.

The dream demon herself wore her usual barely there outfit, complete with netted shawl, and the dancers-to-be gave her a wide portion of the multicolored floor to herself, probably for that very reason. "Let's get jiggy with it," she said to her dancing partner, which attracted a few glances and utterances of "Square."

Her dancing partner, none other than Kahlina, got quite a few glances too, mostly from the men. Her attire was equally out of place; six-inch high heels, then fishnet stockings leading into a mini mini mini skirt, leaving nothing but a top reminiscent of a sports bra, though it lifted and squeezed like no mortal bra could. Clearly, the outfit had been designed to blow the fragile minds of the male discophites, and that it did... until their ladies slapped them and they went back to grooving to the beat that climbed slowly and steadily as if waiting for something.

"What do you think?" Calico asked, all grins as she bobbed her cat ears around and twisted like the dance was aching to break out of her.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

I was well on my way to dreamland, despite the uncomfortableness of using my arms or a rock as a pillow, when the gummy arm that suddenly flopped over my stomach startled me into full wakefulness. For a moment, I stared at the twitching fingers, and the quiet words filled my ears with a sense of horror. Oh gods.

I grabbed at Edgar's wrist, my nose wrinkling at the feel of his giving, slightly warm gumminess and laid it on the ground.

"Ah, thank you for the, ah, gummy love." I could feel my face flaming to bright red as I muttered my thanks. Rolling over, I turned my back to Edgar, a little tense as the thought of what Calico would have Edgar do next. Am I suppose to be seduced? The thought of letting Edgar do more than lay an arm across my clothed stomach chilled me to the bone and made me nauseous. I shifted, unable to pillow my head comfortably enough for me to drift off once more. Sighing, I rolled over and stared at Edgar for a moment. He hadn't moved since the initial lay-down and arm flop, for which I was very grateful.

Lightly, I prodded the shoulder closest to me. Under the cloth of the cloak, it gave a little, but the section I touched that was uncovered was slightly sticky. The sensation was mildly unpleasant. I reached into my pack, past my shaking new pet and grabbed the blanket. With my face feeling as if it had been set on fire, I pulled and tucked Edgar's cloak until the gummy half of him was uncovered and the unpleasantly scented cloak was tucked under his body. I spread my blanket across Edgar, covering him from neck to ankles and lay down beside him, using his chest as a pillow. Unsurprisingly, I found Edgar made a good pillow and cuddled up to him, one arm comfortably stretched over his chest.

Sleep came easily, then.

~~~~~~

What the hell?

The lights and the horrible clothing were the first things I noticed. It took me a moment to realize I was dreaming but this was unlike any dream I had ever had. As a general rule I despised all things Disco and normally dreamt of death or things most disturbing.

I think must be hell or a hell created just for me. I thought as I finally noticed Calico bobbing and twisting a feet away from me. What do I think? I glanced around again, eyeing the figure in white before catching the eye of a man staring at me in what I could only describe as an ogle. Perplexed, I followed his gaze down to my fishnet-encased legs. Gasping I covered my body, embarrassed to the n-th degree.

"Oh my god!" I moaned as I took full stock of what I was wearing, of what I could not cover with my arms alone. I felt like a hundred-dollar hooker as I wobbled on the high heels, stepping back to try and hide in a wall. My gaze caught on my breasts and I stared down at them in horror and fascination. Dream created, not real. Mine aren't this big, besides no DD cup stays up this high and perky even with a sports bra. Shaking my head, I smiled wanly at Calico.

"It's great, just a few adjustments need to be made." Frowning, I looked back down at the tips of the shoes I could see over the exaggerated breasts I had and thought hard about what I would rather be wearing. Really hard. The indecent mini skirt lengthened to a split skirt that brushed my ankles. The black top spread until it was covering my bared torso, in an effort to blend in slightly I added a brightly colored scarf that wrapped around my waist and hung down to almost my knees. As an after thought my bust shrank down to its normal size.

"Much better, Calico this is, neat. Really. The music is a lot different than I expected it would have been."

[Twisted Infinitum]

For the fluidity of the scene, and so as to keep whatever sanity may remain to you dear readers, RumpleGrumblePuss' work will be in blockquotes in this post.

"Oh, that's sexy too... and the real music hasn't started yet," giggled the dream demon as she wiggled about and softly said, "Shake shake shake, shake shake shake, shake your booty," to her actions. "I think it's almost ready," she added, baiting every ear around her.

Suddenly, the lights dimmed and the music kicked up to the funky Disco beat that had alienated a whole generation from their parents. Only the flecks of discoball light played across the increasing kinetic energy of the crowd. Then, a spotlight shone down from the ceiling, centering directly on the white-suited man who was facing away. Like a god, he thrust into the air his pointing right hand, his wooden hand, and made the silent proclamation that they were all going to Funky Town.

"Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I'm a woman's man: no time to talk."

As he spun around, Edgar sang it in a voice that was, amazingly, nothing like a troll chewing rocks. He even had a definite air of charisma around him, and it wasn't just because of the disco lights reflecting oddly from the gummy side of his face, what little could be seen between the wig and the collar.

"Music loud and women warm.
I've been kicked around since I was born.
And now it's all right - it's O.K. -
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand,
The New York Times' effect on man."


As the lights dimmed and the music started up I found myself tapping a foot despite myself. In the dizzying, half-light I shrugged after a moment, it was, after all, only a dream. None of these people were real and who would know that I, the uber hippy hater, was slowly getting in to the groove and dancing to music that had died out several years before I was ever born.

Like all eyes in the crowd my gaze was drawn to the white figure. The wooden hand that moved up into the classic postion should have tipped me off, yet I found myself completely surprised as the figure turned out to be none other than Edgar. Of course, who else would Calico uses to be the center-fold of a dream? She thinks Edgar and I are married


He strutted toward Kahlina, his right arm still thrusting from his hip to the air, and the usual awkward rigidity of his body suddenly made sense. It made perfect sense. It made so much sense that two - no, three women behind him fainted with big grins.

With his eye locked on the only woman who mattered, Edgar launched into the chorus as he dropped to his knees and bounded back up, over and over.

"Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin' and ev'rybody shakin'
and we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive."

Calico suddenly overrode him with a high, keening rendition of,

"Ah, ha, ha, ha. Stayin' Ali-i-i-i-ive!"

The only sound audible over her in the whole club wasn't the bodies that jived about like electrons, nor was it even the pulsing of the base beat. It was the cringe-inducing sound of reinforced glass breaking as Edgar's right knee struck a spider web of white lines into every lighted floor tile that he scooted over. Good thing that he kept moving forward, lest he pound himself into a razor sharp pot hole.


Embarassed, I giggled as Edgar sang to me, I could feel my skin burn as if I had lain naked in the sun for days. I was also certain that at that moment I was doing a great impression of a lobster.

Calico’s pirceingly high singing voice gave me the reason to look away from the suave dream Edgar. Half heartedly I smiled at her, at the child-like enthusiam with which she did, well, everything.


And he picked up where Calico left off, his smooth voice vibrating through every body.

"Well now, I get low and I get high
And if I can't get either I really try.
Got the wings of heaven on my shoes
I'm a dancin' man and I just can't lose.
You know it's all right, it's O.K.
I'll live to see another day
We can try to understand,
The New York Times' effect on man.

"Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother,
You're stayin alive, stayin' alive.
Feel the city breakin' and ev'rybody shakin'
and we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.
Ah, ha, ha, ha, Stayin' Alive."

Nearly every voice joined him in the last line, most of all his master's.


Not wanting to be a dead horse or as they say, a square. I finally shoved my embarassment aside and joined in with the last few lines.

Suddenly, the tempo slammed to a crawl and every couple latched onto each other like they were falling. Edgar flickered from Disco-King-mode to the slow rhythm of the love song instantaneously, and it was with the smoothest of motions that he swept toward Kahlina and wrapped his arms about her, tilting her helplessly back. "Let me take you away to a magical place," he intoned, his voice deep and luxurious as he brought his face closer.


The sudden shifting in music threw me for a moment, I glanced around and promptly forced my eyes back to the realitive saftey of watching Edgar. Some of the dancing I had seen from the couples on the floor could have been at home in a snuff film. Stiffening in the wooden and gummy arms, I could swear that the lips in the gooey half of Egdar’s face were puckering slightly. Horrified, I closed my eyes. It’s just a dream, wake up. Wake up! WAKE UP!!!

Kahlina vanished from the scene like a mirage and left Edgar kissing the air like a lonely teenager practicing for the prom. "Aww... they always wake up before the bedroom scene," Calico pouted, but she was too happy and filled with the spirit of dance to concern herself too much.

With a flick of her flailing hands, she created a dream Kahlina in Edgar's arms, one dressed in the the earlier, bare-all costume. It was fortunate that no mortal witnessed the bedroom scene that followed.

Edgar, of course, did witness it. He had watched from his own bubble the entire act, and it left him confused. They say that children gain self recognition at around age three. Edgar was about one year into his existence, so he knew not that the white-suited hunk o' burnin' love was supposed to be him. He did recognize Kahlina and his master, and their spasms worried him. He knew much about pain, and what the people did in that club - all their shaking and spinning and stomping about - was no doubt a sign of some horrible agony.

Thankfully, Edgar didn't may as much attention when the clothes came off. His Althanas self had felt Kahlina wake, so he wanted to check if she was broken. Amazingly, and clear as a bell, he knew that his concern was not born from a desire to see near-death again.


Heart pounding and gasping, I sat up wide awake and thankful to be awake. That was utterly disturbing. The fact that Edgar was sitting up and watching me, creeped me out. Shuddering, I smiled wanly at Edgar and wished him a good morning. The sound of soft footsteps approaching had me look up, shielding my eyes against the glare of the early morning sun.

[Angel Under Glass]

The sun's glare was partially blocked by a bowl of ivory hair, and the beaming face below it. "Good morning, Kahlina," Tzaphiel said in quiet, crisp, almost over-pronounciated voice, and he grinned like it was his birthday.

- - -

He had been asleep for a long time, he knew that much. The scene before his open eyes, from cave ceiling to sky to canopy, had been a busy blur like years lost in the span of a blink. It didn't make him sad, though, and he wasn't worried that he might have missed something important, because he had witnessed something more important than any event their expedition had contained so far.

A dream. Or a memory.

He lay on his bed in the tower, in that plain stone room that was his. Grandfather was sitting at the wooden desk, the only other piece of furniture, and staring into a bowl of some liquid. Tzaphiel watched him, though the late morning humidity that stretched from the ocean to his balconies was causing his glassy eyes to fog. With a sound between a moan and a squeak, he scrubbed his eyes while blinking furiously.

Grandfather grunted and turned around in his chair, apparently relieved for the distraction. "That's the ocean for you, my boy," he said with a laugh as he creakily stood and walked to the side of the stone bed.

Tzaphiel saw him coming through the haze, and he rolled onto his side with fingers out and grasping. They found the rough woolen robes of the old man, and the boy immediately pressed the drying fabric to his face.

"Just remember to blink before it gets that bad. The world won't go on by in that little second," Grandfather teased, and he patted the boy's hair.

"Bli," Tzaphiel attempted, though it sounded more like pain than the baby's burble it should have been... if he were normal.

Grandfather sighed and knelt slowly next to the bed. "That'll come in time, too," he said with even more gentleness. His brows dropped when he looked into Tzaphiel's quivering black-on-black pupils. "I know you don't like it. But, that's just how you learn. It's ok if you need time or just more examples, because there's no one to bother us here. Watch as much as you need to. Think it over as much as you need to. When the time is right, you'll talk up a storm. I know, because you don't do anything until you've got it planned and perfect." He smiled brightly, and Tzaphiel couldn't help but smile too.

A tiny whistle interrupted them, and both turned to the window. A small, long-beaked shore bird hopped about on the sill, staring at them with beady eyes. Then, it flitted over to the desk, straight for the bowl, and dunked its beak in. Tzaphiel looked to his grandfather in bewilderment, but the old man just stared with a joyous grin wrinkling his face. "Good bird. Drink it all," he intoned so softly that even the boy had trouble hearing it.

Suddenly, the door openned and a stone figure, clearly feminine, walked in. Her grey texture looked none different from the walls. Though, instead of dew, something else clung to her; the wispy outline of a woman. The possessed statue didn't seem odd to the boy, though. After all, this was Mother.

"Cecily!" croaked Grandfather in a sudden childish burst of guilt, and the bird was startled from its drink.

Tsking, she walked heavily toward the table and waved the bird out the window. Then, she picked up the half-drained bowl. "I'll get you some more," she said in a voice like a fair maiden speaking from the bowels of a cave, though the tone was more protectively stern than anything else. Pointedly not waiting for a rebuttal, she spun and left the room with a cheery wave to Tzaphiel, who waved back and grinned mischieviously.

Grandfather just sighed. "When you start talking, stand up for me, ok? I can't help it that all the stuff that's 'good' for me tastes so horrible."

That was when Tzaphiel awoke, for everything was warm; the speaking box hanging against his chest, the metal in his back, and especially his eyes that had found the sliver of the revived moon. It was love that he knew he wouldn't forget, no matter how far he travelled with Kahlina before going home.

- - -

"And good morning to you too, Edgar," he added as he rigidly turned to face the puppet. It was his first greeting. He had to be polite and proper about it. He would do the same when he saw Grandfather next. He'll be so prowd, the boy thought, and his smile beamed brighter than the sun.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

“Tzaphiel?”

Time slowed at the sound the unfamiliar yet crisp and sweet voice that bid me good morning. I just knew that my mouth was open and gaping like a landed fish but I was unable to help myself. I watched Tzaphiel smile, pleased with himself and turned to greet Edgar too.

The stalled seconds caught up with me and spilled over in a rush of movement. I didn't actively recall getting to my feet, but suddenly I had Tzaphiel in my grasp and was spinning him around. The soft laugh I heard come from him erased the last day and a half of worry and frustration.

"You're talking! Could you talk this whole time and just decided not too? Why were you sleeping for so long? Why did you wander off from Edgar and me the other night, did you not think that we'd be worried about you?" All my questions came out in a dizzying rush of words that left me slightly breathless.


Sorry for the delay and the tiny post. I'll edit later, so mush!

[Angel Under Glass]

So many questions, so many answers she expected of him. He had only taken hold of his speech moments ago, and it was already to be tested. That was why the boy never did anything until he knew he had it right.

"I was learning," Tzaphiel informed her cheerily as she placed him back on the ground and squated to his eye level. He felt a little dizzy and a lot excited, but mostly chatty. Her questions didn't even begin to draw on the wealth of words he had been stocking. "I want to learn more, like this." He knelt, the metal on his back sticking out behind him like a tail under the forest green cloak, and he scrawled the first ten letters of the Commonspeak alphabet.

She still had more questions waiting for answers, so he didn't pause a second as he veered into other topics. "I was asleep because I was tired... and lonely. I think it's the night light," he said at a slower, more thoughtful pace as he pointed to where the moon was but a retreating smudge in the dawn sky. "I didn't see it for a long time. So, I went to look, and I ran until I fell." His face became even more furrowed, then, and there was even a glimmer of sadness. "I worried you?" he asked. From those half-memories of being cared for and borne about, he understood the meaning. "I didn't want to do that," he said with his eyes downcast, one bare foot scuffing the dirty path. A warm kiss and a soothing hand upon his head made the sadness go away. Eyes shining, he looked back up at the kind woman.

Over her shoulder, the branches danced. Tzaphiel twitched his head to the side so sharply that his hair snapped as he tried to see what it was. Stillness reigned again, though, and he was about to look away when a blur of orange shot from the leaves to an exposed branch. There, the blur resolved into a bouncy-headed, almost vibrating rodent. It skittered along toward the tree trunk and dove forelimb-deep into a flower that sprouted from a vine there. It was an oddly shaped flower, as close to a bowl as any vegetation he had seen, which was admittedly very little. He remembered his grandfather in that moment, hovering distraughtly over his broth. He had never consumed it with the vigor that the squirrel consumed whatever was in that flower.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Edgar watched the whole scene as if it were simply Kahlina eating her breakfast. His jaw worked, though, attempting and retracting the statements from beyond that were, no doubt, coming too fast and too excitedly from him to grasp. Finally, when Tzaphiel became distracted and the conversation ceased momentarily, his master decided to skip the middle man.

The puppet's head cranked back and then popped forward like the neck was rubber. "Zaphie-poo!" squealed Calico. She fell forward in an attempt to hug him, and it was thankfully with the gummy arm first, then the wooden arm over that. Her blazing red eye turned his hair crimson as she made a sound like she was sniffing his hair, or crying the puppet's nonexistent tears.

The boy, oddly, didn't seem surprised by the fierce glomping. He just automatically braced against it and pointed off into the trees with a very very excited finger. "Oooooh?" Calico said smoothly as she looked past the digit. "The squirrel!" she shouted, and the creature took flight immediately, disappearing into the trees beyond.

"No you don't! You've made my daughter-in-law sad enough already," she screamed as her legs took motion and she awkwardly chased after it. She got as far as the treeline. Then, she almost went down the mountain. It was disguised very well by the thick foliage, but there was no mistaking from this distance the steep slope that the trees grew upon. The only reason she didn't become more intimately familiar with the lay of the land was her wooden hand that griped a low branch hard enough to strangle a golem. She hadn't been thinking at all about survival, so it was definitely a matter of instinct, and more likely Edgar's than her's.

By the combination of the two wills, she swung around on the branch and bounced back to Kahlina like a child fresh from the jungle gym. "It was drinking, right?" she asked with an energetic hum, though it brimmed with suspicious intent. "It might find... this yummy." The wooden hand disappeared under the cloak, causing an odd popping sound, and then produced a vial of clear liquid from the folds. "Sleepy juice, patent pending," she whispered, bobbing her head about to watch for the thieving businessmen who would like nothing more than to get her secret formula.

With a motion probably intended as sly, she slipped the vial into Kahlina's hand and walked away with very pointed steps. She stopped a little ways away and spun to the little boy, faining surprise, and ruffled the gummy hand through his hair. "You're so cute!" she chirped. "I'm glad my little Edgar didn't poke your eyes out."

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

With the appearance of the orange squirrel thing I completely fazed out Edgar’s actions until he raced suddenly after the furball. The shrill voice that yelled at the squirrel and the smoother-than-normal movement were blatant clues that Edgar wasn’t quite Edgar anymore. I watched his body swing around the tree and flounce back towards me and for a second was I worried about meeting Edgar…Calico. Meeting the dream demoness in a dream was one thing, but talking to her as she possessed Edgar’s body was another thing. Poor Edgar.

The vial that was pressed surreptitiously into my hand with whispered words of patents. What patents there were and the ingredients in the liquid that needed patents worried me slightly. Just how well did this stuff work, if at all? Innocently gleaming in the soft light of dawn the small glass vial rested in my palm as I frowned at it. What in the world am I supposed to use this… oh. I looked at the tree that Tzaphiel had pointed out and finally noticed the flowering vines. Duh, just how dense can I get?

Taking my time and shuffling I picked my way over to the tree. I had to bite my tongue to keep from teaching Tzaphiel a few new words as I looked up at the closest flower.I’m really starting to hate this trip. Why am I the only one that has to climb the trees? Grumbling under my breath I shoved the vial down the front of my shirt for easy accessibility once I got up to the flower.

Ten minutes and a body length later found me sprawled across a branch, my legs twined firmly around it to stabilize me. I fought with the cap of the vial for a moment before giving up and tugging it off with my teeth. Cautiously I sniffed the liquid and detected nothing, no odors, and no burning fumes. Shrugging, I pulled the bowl-like blossom that still held a dram or two of nectar in it closer and poured in the potion until the flower was mostly full. Just to be sure that the nectar and sleeping potion were mixed I stirred it with a finger.

Habit born of my love and obsession for baking had me bring the fluid moistened finger to my lips to lick before I realized that that wasn’t the best of ideas. Recapping the vial and shoving it back into the handy quick storage, I squirmed back along the branch to the trunk. Chewing on my lip, I glanced down to find the next branch. Absently, I licked my lower lip at the slightly sweet taste I found to be there. It wasn’t until I reached the ground that it dawned on me where the faint smear of sweetness could have come from. Hopefully, it’s not that powerful.

“Okay guys, all that’s left is to wait. Quietly. Hopefully the little orange freak will come back.”

[Twisted Infinitum]

In all the recorded history of the innumerable worlds, scholars had always tried to catalogue the source, or sources, of dreams. In many cultures, they were gods; sometimes called the Fears, the Whispers, or the Beddy-Wetters. Other societies went the geeky way of science and tried to quantify the different dream demons, or at least their effects, into graphs and scales, 2D and 3D representations with more colors than fruit bat vomit, that often brought about fits of rage (or hilarity) when a dream demon chose to search the sleep-scape for grandiose self-references.

However, amid the vast research done upon the essence of Onyx Calico, there was one descriptor that never ever, not even by way of typo, appeared within three encyclopedia volumes of her. That word was 'Quiet'.

"Okee dokee," the possessed puppet agreed with a wild salute, and at a volume that already defeated their purpose.

She plopped herself down to a crosslegged position, creaking and popping audibly, and tussled Zaphie-poo's ivory mop like there were gold encrusted ticks hiding within. "You have such pretty hair, sweety. Someday, when Edgar joins the Althanas Hair Club for Hanchulans, he'll get his new hair in your color. Then, I just need to make him a fancy white suit, like the one Kahlina liked so much." A deformed half-smile flew Kahlina's way. "Oh, and a real big man mast, which she missed out on, though I know she would have liked it too. Then, he'll be one sexy beast!"

Some god far above, probably more attentive than a dream demon, must have wanted to spare Tzaphiel the lesson in bad words, because life stirred in the leaves above them despite Calico's excited ramblings. Tzaphiel's intent pointing finally put the brakes on the puppet's mouth, though it couldn't stop the throaty squeal that welled up when the orange bundle of fur burst from the leaves overhead and careened toward the necessary branch. Tiny webbed paws hugged the bark for dear life, and the cheeky head attached to them vibrated like a junky's.

It would be safe to assume that the flower's nector - well, all but this one - contained a concentration of sugar that could remedy a heart attack if taken promptly.

Without a glimmer of ettiquette, let alone self preservation, the squirrel dove in. Granted, "someone spiked the punch" probably wasn't a common phrase in this section of the world. The darling creature, blissfully unaware of the extra ingredient, shook its hindquarters in delight. And, as its belly filled, the addiction was abated and the shaking slowed, then stopped.

Even Calico watched with rapt, almost-silent attention as the seconds passed. And passed. And passed some more. Suddenly, she came to a sudden realization and screamed it to the sky, "He fell asleep in the bowl! He'll drown!"

Of everyone present, the squirrel jumped the highest. Adrenaline fueled it for a good two seconds before it suffered the inevitable crash... and crashed. The poor thing lay slung out in a lower branch, then drooped to a lower one, then another. Its little wing flaps wobbled weakly as instinct made a little foreground within the too-plastered-to-care brain.

"I'll catch it," Calico shouted after it became apparent that Kahlina's response time was strangely lacking. She fished around in the woman's pocket and plucked out the stone while already in midstride.

[Angel Under Glass]

It seemed like a fun game, this "squirrel feeding". Mother had always seemed to enjoy feeding Grandfather, or more accurately, forcing him to eat. With the enthusiasm the bizarre orange creatures had for their dinner, it almost seemed too easy.

At least the wooden man was willing to make the task more lively, and he did it while wearing that beautiful aura not seen since Tzaphiel's first night with them. It shone so brilliantly to his eyes despite the noonday light, enchanting him into silence and pshing aside his desire to have a real conversation for the first time in his life. He did listen as intently as ever, though, and it was only the next squirrel's timing that prevented phrases like "sexy beast" and "man mast" from entering his vocabulary permanently.

This time, the squirrel stayed longer. It paraded shakily on the branch, and Tzaphiel had a good opportunity to study it. A bird, it definitely was not. In fact, it looked more like his little friend, at least in the head. His hands patted the chipmunk dragon's fuzzy noggin with soft, distracted strokes, and no sign of surprise that he couldn't remember hugging the toy chimera to his chest or even where it had been before.

When the drinking creature stopped moving, Tzaphiel began forming the words for a question. It was difficult, to say the least, finding a way to ask about the normalcy of an event without knowing how to describe the event.

Thankfully, the wooden man was ready with an answer before the question was even asked. Then, he ran off with a small stone held in his creaking fingers. Tzaphiel ran behind him, his short feet bluring as he easily kept pace. It made sense that this was part of the game, as much sense as any of it made, but there was a definite look of desperation in the soft side of the man's face as well as the way he held the pebble forward. Then, there was the agonized sound that came from his throat when the squirrel disappeared down the slope.

"You need help," Tzaphiel informed the puppet kindly. Quick as a striking cobra, and as gentle as if handling a lady bug, he reached up and closed his tiny fingers around the stone. Purposefully, he stepped to the obscured lip of the hillside and sighted down it. There was a single spot of motion becoming smaller and smaller as it bumped over roots and kicked up dust and grass. With numberless equations flickering within his intent eyes, Tzaphiel rose his arm and remembered their game on the water. Each bulge of earth became just a sea swell, and each root a wave curling over in a white crown.

In a single movement as rapid as his running strides, he loosed the stone. It thunked against the earth well behind the squirrel's tiny trail of destruction. Amid the low leaves, it disappeared until, a second later, it bounced from the undergrowth and plummeted after the drunken, dreaming squirrel. It gleamed alongside thick trunks and in and out of the undergrowth like a pixie light.

In the distance, the squirrel ran out of runway. It was barely visible between the trees, but Tzaphiel could just make out that the slope dropped to a vertical that overlooked the thick forest beyond. Bouncing off one final ramp of earth, the orange glider hung in the air like a swell of cloud. If it was worried for the fall, it only showed in small twitches more reminiscent of restless sleep than fear.

At the apex of the fuzzy creature's trajectory, the stone skittered along the same earthen ramp and pinged against the squirrel's skyward bottom. Silently, it disappeared as if it truly had been just a cloud.

Tzaphiel tilted his head to the side in wonderment. Then, he looked up to the slack-jawed puppet. "Is the game over?" he asked.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Irritation and the need for sleep crowded in on my brain, making it hard to think let alone yell at the possessed puppet to shut the hell up. Drunkenly, I swayed where I sat, often wishing I could mutter the curses I held back for Tzaphiel’s sake. I knew what was wrong, it took me a while to figure it out as I sat there and waited for the next animal to show. I had licked the potion-tainted nectar off of my lip, at least I was reasonably certain that’s what had happened. I didn’t think that Calico had deliberately dosed me after all.

While I wrestled with my confused and sluggish thoughts both Calico and Tzaphiel left, racing after the animal I obviously missed spotting. Tzaphiel returned leading Edgar, his little face slightly confused as if nothing we did made since to him. Poor little guy. I pulled myself as upright as I could.

“Did we get the squirrel thing?” Edgar’s face was a caricature of the cat that had gotten into the cream. I was half surprised that she didn’t dance the puppet’s body apart in her manic approach to … well everything.

“Yup! My little Tzaphie-pooh has quite the arm on him! I’m so proud of him, you should have seen it!” I watched the puppet rumple up Tzaphiel’s hair once more and nodded.

“Okay then, I’m, I’m going to take a nap. Later guys.” I flopped back where I sat and found the ground softer than I’d ever felt it before. A breath later sleep stole over me and obliterated everything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi ho, hi ho. If I had a bomb, off it’d go. Gods, I hate this damned island. I grumbled under my breath continuously as the three of us headed down into the interior of the island. With no path to follow we climbed, tumbled and slid over tree roots, rocks the size of mini vans and the rough textured surfaces of fallen trees. The air was warm and humid, making me feel as if I were wrapped in a warm wet blanket The upsided is the insects love it… Wait that’s not an upside either.

It wasn’t until the sky was turning several lovely shades that I, now far too miserable and disgruntled to admire it, remembered to check the next stone and find what animal it was were we to find and capture.

And the winner is… a cat. I studied the tiny picture of a cat that reminded me of a panther. The sleek, compact body was lovely to look at but I hoped we could find one asleep and simply peg it with the stone before it awoke and made a snack of us. Don’t panthers often stalk their prey from up in trees? I think I remember reading something on them actually hanging by their ankles from a tree branch.

[Angel Under Glass]

"Oh, Kahlina. She's just always getting into the sauce," the radiant man said as he knelt at the woman's head and stuck his gummy hand under her shirt. From Kahlina's throat came a grumble like a territorial animal, and then she rolled violently over.

"Why are you..." Tzaphiel asked slowly, but he couldn't find the words to describe the situation. As pretty as the wooden man was, he was so strange. Nothing that Grandfather or Mother had done could have prepared the boy for such oddities as this.

The man didn't responded. But, the aura did flicker, almost as if that energetic entity were shrinking away to somewhere he couldn't see. "Help, please," the high voice whimpered, "Too squishy." Tzaphiel peddled closer to the two and looked down. It only took a moment to realize what was wrong. The man's gummy arm was still in Kahlina's shirt, and it looked rather deformed from the weight of her limp body on it.

Now, a far more difficult puzzle was how to remedy the grope-gone-wrong; the implications of which, naturally, went clear over Tzaphiel's shiny head. Cautiously, he poked at Kahlina's shoulder. She grumbled again, but didn't move. The boy leaned over farther, his face furrowed in intent concentration.

Edgar made another whimpering sound, and his wooden hand hovered closer to Kahlina. However, the heavy, splintering limb jerked to a halt with a sudden show of restraint that momentarily stilled the frantic energy of Edgar's current aura.

I'm glad my little Edgar didn't poke your eyes out.

Tzaphiel remembered those odd words suddenly, and he found a new and very threatening motivation. Grandfather had gotten some sand in his eyes, once, and it had been hard to watch with Mother trying to help as best she could with her stone fingers. Wood could hardly be better.

As Tzaphiel continued to poke and prod, he forgot about the chipmunk dragon that he had been hugging. Abandoned in midair, it fell upon Kahlina's back and kissed her neck with its fuzzy face. Twitching spastically, she sent the toy flying and rolled onto her back again.

"Oh biscuit," Tzaphiel chirped, a phrase that had been frequently used by Grandfather in such situations. With feet blurring, he ran to his fuzzy friend and scooped it up protectively.

"Woohoo!" the wooden man shouted loud enough that Kahlina should have bolted awake. She just grumbled again, though, as Edgar stood over her and held proudly aloft the small glass vial he had plucked from her cleavage. "Don't tell mommy that Edgar's a pervert, okay," the sweet voice warned him. Then, the aura disappeared, leaving behind a dim, awkward shell that fumbled to put the vial back into some concealed compartment.

Tzaphiel held the chimera's fuzzy head to his lips and looked over the ears disappointedly. He wanted to talk to that beautiful creature, but it always went away so suddenly. It was a busy thing. At least, its energy felt that way. It must have had other places to be and other people to pull glass tubes out of.

~

The incident faded into memory by the time the three explorers were picking their way through the messy forest floor again. It was thicker here. Sometimes, entire trees were just lying on the ground and had to be walked over like bridges across the leafy green sea of undergrowth. Tzaphiel didn't seem to have as much trouble as Kahlina, though. Once he had gotten the hang of it, it was as simple as looking where he wanted to go. His feet, with little, precise steps, found a way to traverse whatever vegetation lay underfoot.

"Walk like you are floating," he informed his companions when he saw their distress, Edgar's more than Kahlina's. While Kahlina was making passable progress, ducking under branches and squirming through gaps that were just large enough for her, the wooden man was getting hung up on everything from branches to his own limbs.

Spinning on a downed tree, Tzaphiel observed the situation and said, "Be tiny," before he realized that it would be difficult to achieve. Grandfather had always said that the worst part of talking was knowing when to be quiet.

Then, the boy realized that someone else was watching Edgar just as intently, and that someone else was definitely being quiet about it. "Can you help him?" he asked of the green eyes almost obscured in the leaves; eyes that quickly drifted to the flesh and blood leader of their group. Shadows shifted as a tongue slid along a black muzzle.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

It was kind of hard to float as you walk while the entire forest seemed hell bent on tripping me. It was either look up, watch out for low hanging branches and trip over something or look at my feet and get smacked upside the head by a branch. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I chewed on my tongue in frustration to keep from cursing every time I walked into or tripped over something.

“ ‘Be tiny.’ “ Was my final straw, I stopped and turned to Tzaphiel to tell him not so politely to shut up. I liked the little bugger better when he was silent. However his next question stilled the sharp remark before it fell past my lips. Who can help? I stepped closer and followed his gaze only to see a rough looking pink tongue lick the black fuzzy muzzle it went too. I’d like to think that I actually HAD a thought occur, but in reality I bolted in sheer instinct. A half dozen steps later, when my brain finally caught up to the moment, I shouted at my companions to run.

Over the sound of my pounding footsteps, I heard the soft thump of padded feet and the rustle of leaves in the wake of the cat’s passing. I REALLY hate this island. I’m supposed to be at the top of the food chain, not some cat’s toy. Oddly enough, a part of some obscure poem I had once read drifted through my head in a rather disturbing manner. Red of blood and white of bone. In some vague part of my mind I was mildly surprised that I hadn’t tripped over anything yet in my fight or flight response.

I hopped onto a convenient highway created by a fallen tree. As I crashed into the still living branches I came upon the end. About eight feet below me lay the forest floor and without stopping to think about it, I flung myself out of the tree. Both knees shrieked in protest at the rough landing and gave out a second later. Hitting the ground and rolling knocked the breath out of me. Wheezing and scrambling up onto all fours, I froze at an angry squall from the cat. Why am I still alive? I wondered, struggling to catch my breath. Just out of reach of tooth and claw the cat hung from a deep V in the trunk, it’s tail caught in the vise like grasp of the branches.

I gaped up at the snarling whirlwind of fur that struggled to free itself, probably looking like a tourist. Blinking and snapping my mouth shut I glanced around for a branch or something to whack the cat into submission.

[Twisted Infinitum]

"Fuzzy pinata!" screamed the Althanas-bound Calico as she disjointedly bolted from the trees. Her hands were clasped together, though one wasn't connected to her. In her gummy hand was the wooden arm, its shoulder stump waving about without a socket to call home, like the gruesome aftermath of an overenthusiastic handshake. And with that worn and abused bludgeon, she slapped the suspended kitty across its hindquarters.

If you think a cat hanging by its tail would be a frenzy of hissing hysteria, you haven't seen a cat hanging by its tail... and getting spanked.

With a roar that bowed the trees, the panther swiped a passive paw at the dislocated wooden arm and sent it bouncing farther out into the green unknown. "Fuzzy pinata with claws!" Calico amended as she ducked down and scrambled after the arm on all fours... er.. threes. "Here army army arm," echoed her call after she had disappeared back into the jungle.

In her wake, left like garbage delivered to the curb, was a litter of branches and assorted jungle paraphenalia that had clung to the puppet's body during the frantic damsel-in-distress chase. It held everything from leafy boughs to battered vines to bird nests and a few of the frazzled owners. There was even a small boy, silver of hair and fair of skin, his black on black eyes wobbling about in his skull.

[Angel Under Glass]

Edgar didn't need to be tiny, Tzaphiel realized as he became a captive passenger in the mat of nature gathering behind the wooden man. He moved fast enough by flailing and boaring a hole through the jungle, all while screaming, "I'll save you, my princess!"

Tzaphiel knew that voice. But, more importantly, he knew that beautifully glowing aura that drug him through the tunnel of ruined vegetation. He tried to squawk out something; a greeting, a compliment, a song, it didn't matter. However, the ride was becoming bumpier and, all of the sudden, it crashed to a halt.

He regained his senses amid the background of harsh hissing (the ocean?) and the angry twitter of colorful birds. One of them bounded about on his chest, its beak wavering over its mangled nest. "That tickles," the boy whispered weakly as he reached to pet the distraught creature like he would his chipmunk dragon. The bird responded with a harsh chitter and jumped out of reach. Sadly, it only managed three flaps before a great beast hanging from the sky swatted it across the jungle.

Tzaphiel's quivering eyes met those of the predator. Such wide, violent eyes, windows into more animalistic hate than he could fathom. He whimpered quietly and lay deeper in the mat of jungle bedding. His hand found the fuzzy, serpentine shape of his friend next to him, and he hugged it close to keep the monster from stealing it too as it flailed dark, wrathful claws at him.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Time slowed and leaped in odd bounds as I spotted Tzaphiel caught up in his leafy confines. A convenient batting toy for the severely pissed of feline that hung just a few feet above.

“Stick, stick, stick, stick…” I chanted under my breath as I scrabbled around on the ground furiously.

“Calico, that’s not a pinata!” I screamed at Calico, half watching the possesed puppet first spank the cat then race off after the limb. Something smooth poked my hip as I bent over, grabbing a branch that wasn’t more than a rotting length of wood as big around as my finger. In hand the branch crunched unpleasantly and its annoyed, many-legged inhabitants began rushing about, a few scrabbling across my fingers

“The stone, you stupid girl!” I yelled at myself as I snatched up the branch and flung it at the cat. I dug the bright stone from my pocket and threw it as hard as I could at the cat. With a soft boom of air rushing in to fill a void, the cat minus its new ant infestation, disappeared. Still flooded with adrenaline, I trembled and decided to take just a moment to calm my nerves. I was fairly certain that they were hiding in some corner, sobbing their eyes out.

With the moment passed and the tremors running through my body easing off somewhat, I stood up from my crouched position and took a deep breath or three. Oh, crap, Tzaphiel. Silently, and equally, I cursed first myself then Perth. I blamed everything on me to a certain extent. After all, it was my wish to change that lead me here after all. Perth on the other hand, I rather hoped the cat ripped him a new one; why did everything he needed have to be fresh and alive? And dangerous, oh yes, mustn't forget dangerous, I thought sourly.

“Kiddo, I think you’re a little strapped for help, need a hand up?” I smiled and shook my head at my own pathetic attempt at humor. Careful to not loosen the wrong vine and send Tzaphiel sliding in an unexpected direction I slowly worked him loose. Despite my legs still being a little shaky, once Tzaphiel was free I scooped him up, unable to help myself, and looked him over for any cuts or bumps. My maternal worry sated, I hugged the little guy and set him on his feet.

“Come on, we’d better find Edgar and Calico. There’s no telling what could happen to them.”

[Angel Under Glass]

Suddenly, with nothing but a breath of air and the booming silence of the peaceful jungle, the angry claws were gone. Their hissing, screaming owner was gone too, evaporated like a nightmare worse than any he could create on his own. If Tzaphiel had been a normal boy, full in form and function, his jungle nest would no doubt have become, by now, a swamp of frightened wee.

Instead, his young, inorganic nerves were content with making his body shiver like the vines and branches were the cold fingers of Father Winter, vacationing from that 'Salvar' place Grandfather had told him about. With wide and wobbly eyes, he watched another shape move over him, and his arms spasmed as he wavered between hiding behind his precious chipmunk dragon and protecting it with his small body.

Kahlina's joke, when it reached his feverishly alert ears, elicited a smile not of humor, but relief. "Uh huh," Tzaphiel gurgled, shocked that his little pocket of the universe, previously stretching from foliage nest to snarling black specter of death, welcomed something as gentle and comforting as Kahlina's tender arms.

With hands efficient and kind, she plucked and preened him, hugged him sweetly, and set him down. When his feet finally touched the ground, he broke out of his stupefied trance. He became acutely aware of the world beyond the previous nightmare; a world of dense, placid vegetation on all sides, crowding them into the bare shadow of the near-fallen tree. The space that he was afforded, though, was enough for the tension to leave his body, and the joy to escape its quivering cage in his heart.

"Thank you," he blurted as he pressed his face into her pant leg and hugged tight like he would ride her shin to safety. His voice cracked on the tail of the last word, a disconcertingly false sob, for neither his eyes nor throat had the moisture necessary to express the proper gushing hysteria so natural in real children.

[Twisted Infinitum]

To an Edgar, the world is a fresh, magnificent place brimming with adventures to stumble awkwardly through and lessons to vaguely understand, and then maybe forget in an hour.

The lesson of this specific hour was 'Teamwork'. His task was to walk, a simple concept, but made immeasurably more difficult with the stubborn vines and thick-leafed bushes knitting a carpet around his ankles. His master's task was to deal with the upper limbs. Specifically, to use one to attached the other.

Insert thingamabobits A into whatsimajib B, she recited bewilderingly into the Hanchulan-wrapped bubble as she wrestled with invisible crane controls that seemed to be moving the gummy arm in her view. Keep looking at your shoulder, sweety, she chided, her little pink tongue poking out with concentration.

In order to look at both his shoulder and the tangled path ahead of him, Edgar assumed a position that would have put a contortionist to shame, possibly even into their grave. He didn't sustain the twisty shape with as much grace as those professionals, of course, but at least the jungle was relenting before his passage.

Now, if Edgar had taken the time to think about it, as sadly improbably as that is, he would have realized something. Since the trees were becoming more widely spaced and the grasping green carpet less oppressive, he was definitely not heading to the place where Kahlina and Tzaphiel had been left with the razor-wielding pinata of death. But, to his credit, he probably didn't even realize that that was their destination.

Calico, more unfortunately, seemed to have forgotten about that danger to wife and child as soon as the reattachment of the arm became a closer and far more attainable objective. Young at heart as she was, the responsibilities of a grandmother didn't compare with her love of crane games, and she was so close to winning the prize.

With a song of ratcheting gears, the arm found its home again. Victory! the goddess shouted, flashing two fingers at Edgar's quivering dream half. Now, let's go find Kahlie-poo and beat up the-

As swiftly as changing channels, the heavy green shroud in the bubble turned to a scene from the finest oil paintings of the Raiaeran galleries. The sky was aglow in the bright pink of a setting sun, and the lofty clouds soaked it up. Fluffy cookies in bubble gum milk. Below, the island's large interior lake reflected the scene like a giant's hand mirror, stretching as far as the distant inner shores that wrapped around both sides. Any signs of life were lost in the glow, no animals dotting the crescent beach, no island cities (that she might have known about had she bothered to research their vessel's destination). The view was just pretty and pink and simple, no spooty mortals to muck it up.

We need to show your wifey! This is the perfect spot for your honeymoon, she swooned with stars in her eyes. Oh no!, she suddenly cried, The bad kitty! We need to go back!

Edgar twitched around back to the forest, but was brought to a dead stop when the beach seemed to twist in front of him. Right and left, up and down, got lost for a hazy moment, though his master’s voice was a clear as ever.

Holy shnikeys! Beach dunes! the dream demon cheered as if 'beach dunes' were both expected and appreciated. To either side of Edgar, the beach looked more like a desert after a howling sandstorm, one that had traveled along the coast as if mimicking the path of hand-in-hand lovers. The dunes, as high as Edgar's waist, glistened with freshly turned grains. The glare and the jarring lack of a level path still disoriented him, especially given the dunes' odd angles. They weren't simply perpendicular to the lapping water, but leaned side to side on every second rise. It looked as if the shaping wind had blown slightly to the tree line with one stroke, then to the water in the next, as it took the scenic route along the island's interior.

Bless her heart, Calico really was trying to go back. Really. If only the island hadn't become so damn fascinating all of the sudden.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

As my leg was held in a death grip, I patted Tzaphiel’s head gently. The poor little guy was obviously shell shocked and needed comfort. If I weren’t so jittery still I would offer to carry him, but the last thing I wanted to do was to fall and hurt either of us. We were incredibly lucky that demon kitty had only wanted to play with its next meal first.

The dry sob that broke Tzaphiel's words twisted my heart painfully, I plucked at the hands still grasping my leg for all they were worth and knelt down. Gently, I stroked his back and hair as I hugged him once more, noticing the lack of tears in his eyes but the definite expression of terror.

“It’s okay Tzaphiel. If I can help it, I won’t let anything hurt you.” I whispered soothingly.

Though my legs were a bit wobbly (if I were completely honest with myself, they felt like jelly) I followed the trail of torn vines and broken branches. For once, I was grateful that Edgar was such a clumsy and destructive person. The path was blessedly easy to walk through on rubbery legs. Mental note number eight thousand and six, do not try to play the hero. Especially when the baddie has fangs, teeth and a bad disposition .

The forest broke off abruptly into the beach, the sand rolling in steep dunes. For a second I looked about before spotting Edgar climbing and stumbling over the mountainous piles, heading off down the beach.

“Were in the world is he going?” I muttered under my breath. It occurred to me that I hadn’t looked yet at the last stone. Without knowing what we were supposed to acquire this time, we did not know where to head. Digging in my pocket, I pulled out the last smooth stone and held it up to look at the image shown in the pink and golden glow of sunset. It was... an egg?

In the blue stone a blue-speckled white egg was shown. I frowned and shook my head; the image didn’t even show any background. Not a single clue as to where to look for the egg. Maybe the forest, it looks kind of like a robin’s egg.

Grumbling under my breath and scrambling over the dunes, I headed for the water’s edge. It would be much easier to catch up to Edgar on the relatively smooth sand next to the lake. I only half noticed the pattern imprinted in the wet sand as I hurried towards the black cloaked figure of my second companion.

[Twisted Infinitum]

Five dunes into his sandy trek, Edgar came to a teetering halt. The drop before him was deeper than the others, so much that the water flooded into it. Oh, yummy! Calico exclaimed, for there was a collection of delectable, half submerged eggs calling the shallow pool home.

Upon his masters urgings, Edgar slid down the small basin’s wall, disrupting the scaly imprints in the sand, and splashed down into the soggy nest. Without any idea of how delicate eggs are reputed to be, he yanked one of the blue-speckled, head-sized treasures from its bed and sloshed back to the deformed slope that he had created.

After a moment of otherworldly strategizing, he tossed the egg up to the top of the dune and set his clumsy limbs to climbing after it. The slope deformed further, abolishing the beautiful uniformity that had once characterized the bowl. By the time that he had scrabbled his way onto the dry sand, Kahlina was only two dunes distant.

Perfect! Show her!

Edgar wrestled the egg from the earth once more and hoisted it above his head triumphantly. Then, his lipless mouth opened and from it came the garbled decree of the almighty. “Omelet!”

As if the announcement was an invitation for dinner guests, life stirred in the water to his side, frothing the bubble gum mirror into a furious red spray that rained over the forest. A screech rose from the bowels of the swell, heralding the immense serpentine body that burst from the wall of water and crashed down around the perimeter of the nest.

The egg fell from Edgar’s grasp as he dumbly stumbled down the dry side of the dune, push by the force of the gargantuan body’s impact. Within, his master screamed, but her words were dwarfed by the high pitched howl of their omelet-to-be’s mother. Her snout, narrow on her body but massive enough to cut a schooner in two, gapped open wider and reached to the sky. Then, her sinewy neck arching, the enraged mother fell - jaws first - upon the tiny, dark egg-napper in the sand.

It was then, and only then, that Edgar’s bewildered mind came to grips with the fact that he was in danger, and he swiped wildly about with all his limbs as the sea dragon’s shadow stole away the candy sunset.

[RumpleGrumblePuss]

Torn between looking at the egg Edgar had just shouted was dinner and the sudden frothing of the water just off shore, I immediately realized what the too-loud roar was all about. Hell, anything with ovaries would automatically realize it was the enraged shriek of an angry mother.

Sand sprayed in all directions around the sea serpent’s head, tossing Edgar out into the water much like the rag doll he was. Still rather numb from my play session with the demon cat, I stood there, worried about Edgar but far too intelligent to go running past a giant snake just to check on him. Jaws working to spit out the sand in its mouth, the sea dragon raised its head.

Out in the water, Edgar’s body popped up. Buoyantly, he floated face down.

No help there. Oh shit, it’s looking at me. Slowly I backed up, hoping that like any other snake I had ever heard of, if I left it alone, it would leave me alone. My backpack slipped off the shoulder it was hanging from and hung uncomfortably from an elbow. Behind my back, I made shooing gestures at Tzaphiel.

From the water, something dark and as big around as one of my arms shot out. It caught me high on the chest, lifting me off my feet. I felt my bag fall off my arm at the sudden movement and for a moment or two what I generally considered ‘Up’ got really confused. I hit the ground shoulder first and kept rolling, crashing through a bush before a tree stopped me.

Everything ached as I lay on the ground in a boneless sprawl, my body shaking as if cold in shock. A low, unintelligible noise, partly pain and partly delayed surprise trickled out of my mouth. It took a few blinks to get my eyes focusing once more; once they did I looked back through the convenient hole I had made in the bush. I could see Tzaphiel’s legs and part of his back, he wasn’t moving.

Stupid kid. Do I really wanna get up? It‘s almost comfy here. Moaning, I thrashed on the ground, righting my limbs and pulling myself up on hands and knees. Unable to quell the tremors that shook me and feeling a million years old I, forced myself upright and hissed in pain at the pull on scraped and bruised skin.

“You better be grateful I have a sense of honor and the fact that I don’t truly believe all this is really real.” I chomped on my lower lip as the first few shaky steps hurt like nothing else. ...but gods does this hurt for a dream.

[Angel Under Glass]

It seemed an eternity that Tzaphiel stood helplessly still and watched the enraged beast rise from the beautiful water, screaming unlike anything he could have imagined. Nothing in his life, or in Grandfather's stories, or even in his childish imagination could have prepared him for a monstrosity so massive and terrifying. Kahlina's frantic gestures were meaningless, mere distractions from the impossible scene that he couldn't look away from.

In an explosion of sand, the wonderfully bizarre wooden man was thrown into the vile red water that had brought the monster. Tzaphiel squawked, a sound far too small to be heard over the beach's upheaval and its scaley architect. Again, the chipmunk dragon had found its way into his arms, and he wrung the poor thing's body in horror. Sadly, not a single drop of bravery spilled from the placid chimera.

Then, in a blur of motion that he barely noticed, Kahlina was gone. In her place hung the beast's tail, so close that it blinded him to the beach beyond. He saw himself in the mirrored scales, eyes wide and quivering, a delicious snack for the sea's guardian; the same sea that had swallowed his home across the island days ago.

Aching to cry, he fell to his knees and heaved dry sobs into the sand, when he suddenly found terrified eyes staring at him that weren't his own. From Kahlina's abandoned backpack, her new pet had fallen. Curled on its haunches, its thin fingers worked together until red dripped from them, and its eyes bugged out farther than Tzaphiel's own.

Another shriek vibrated the beach's golden sand as the tail slipped back into the depths and the serpent hoisted more of its near-infinite body onto the sand. Tzaphiel looked up to see the pointed snout closer, eyes blazing behind it as if to punish him for every bad deed in his short life. Arcing high above him, the scaled head appeared to mingle with the clouds, becoming a sleek, shimmering totem in the sky. Then, it fell. The age-battered teeth gained detail excruciatingly quickly as they filled his vision.

With death so imminent, Tzaphiel finally remembered how to move his legs. But first, consciencious boy that he was, he scooped Kahlina's pet into his arms and held it against the chipmunk dragon. The terrified animal grabbed hold of the yielding scales as, too soon, hot salty breath washed over the back of the boy's neck.

Suddenly, Tzaphiel felt Grandfather nearby.

A single metalic chime reached his ears, and the blunted sword grafted to his back popped its nearly unnoticeable seams. A cascade of clicking metal silenced the monter's howl, and a burst of warm, loving wind brought with it a brilliant blue light. Tzaphiel had to close his eyes, but he wasn't frightened. It felt that, after so long searching, he had finally found Grandfather.

He opened his eyes and saw his reflection a hundred times over, not in the pitted scales of the serpent, but in the polished plumes of angelic metal wings. All those Tzaphiels shared the same smile that he felt on his face, because he knew that Grandfather would protect him no matter where he travelled.

The serpent's shriek was silent, lost in the broken, bloody snout that had met the seraphim wall. The thick body fell to the sand, bowing the sea and the forest apart, as the head shrank back and spilled a shower of dislodged scales.

With metal feathers singing against one another, Tzaphiel's wings parted to reveal the scene before him. He was no longer afraid, for his vision was framed by the loving white light of Grandfather's gift, and the monster before him was overshadowed by another, even more energetic, aura.

Edgar stood on the beach, wearing the chaotic shroud of that lovely creature beyond, and from his mouth spilled her melodic voice like a hyperactive choir of angels.

"Foooouuuund it!"

[Twisted Infinitum]

"I didn't know Tzaphie-doodle had wings..." Calico mumbled, staring in awe at the boy's heavenly shroud as well as the beautiful blue aura around it. There was an odd feeling there, too, visible to her in the blinding glints from the multifaceted feathers.

Whisper-thin memories, flashing instant to instant; a dusty brown sleeve brushing against silver hair, worn fingers stroking a child's unnaturally cool cheek, and those same fingers, slightly less worn, deftly playing metal and leather and glittering soul lights into a creation as complete (in love if not form) as nature's own.

She also saw, in the way that gods do, that over the whole of Althanas, all that remained of the man were those soothing memories. Sorrow sank the corners of her manic grin, and her quivering eyes silently asked if the poor boy knew.

Such a complex expression didn't translate well to Edgar's face, though, as it always shook like that, and it shook even more with the renewed stirring of their gargantuan guest.

Screaming a cacophony of rage and glittering blood spray, she swiveled toward the small egg-napper with the grating voice. It simply stood, rooted in the shallow surf, and turned its bulbous, crimson, gumdrop of an eye to point at the mother. Whether she felt fear at these resilient pests, mockery in their defiance, or was simply acting out the most essential of instincts, her course was the same. She flattened her body to the beach, blasting twin blades of sand high to either side, and heaved with all of her length that had purchase.

"Oh yeah," Calico chirped toward the howling, serpentine locomotive barreling at her. She raised her gummy, clenched fist like a battering ram and set her lopsided legs into a splashing, stumbling charge. Wind and rank sea breath swelled before the widening maw, to which she answered with the only battle cry that came to mind.

"Choooo chooo!"

In the blink of an eye, the distance closed between the two maternal figures... and reached the negative digits as the abused puppet's body moved past the dripping teeth, over the convulsing tongue, and into the record books for "Dumbest Tactic in Dragon Slaying History". Registering a kind of surprise not normally seen in the animal kingdom, the sea dragon jerked back and upward, choking down the all-too-willing meal.

Yay! Your turn! Calico shouted as she danced away from the bubble, leaving Edgar to experience all those icky esophagus-related sensations on his own. Open your hand and let mommy's holy light pour out.

In the crushing darkness of the beast's throat, Edgar's gummy fist popped open and let loose the small stone his master had plucked from among Kahlina's pre-flight scattering of possessions.

The dragon let out one noisy cough, then, without the slightest trace of light (holy or otherwise), popped out of existence. Amid the low sonic boom of the sudden vacuum and the harsh swell of the now-vacant water, the only other sign of the dragon's existence was its last meal, momentarily suspended in a Superman pose.

Victoriously, the cloaked hero fell from the sky and ate sand.