BRING IT! (open to anyone)

[Whiteshadow]

The Citadel.

Eternium had heard tons of rumors and stories about this legendary place, but this was the first time he had actually been to the place. It was majestic, soaring over his gaze like a finger of some giant god, pointing to the place of destiny.

He yawned. It was still early, and he needed some exercise. So why not go to the Citadel? Dweia, who rested on his shoulder, yawned as well as she pawed his head. "I know, I know..." He grumbled, striding quickly across the giant expanse that seperated him from the Citadel. "I'll get ya food soon. I'm hungry too, ya know."

Dweia simply purred contentedly.

Eternium sighed as he walked. "Whatever am I going to do with you, kitten?"

((i'm leaving this open to anyone who wants to battle, you choose setting and stuff, this is my very first Citadel battle and I don't want to screw it up. ^^))

[Eyes of...]

“You are new here too?”

Un-judgmental. Calm. Unafraid.

The words of that touched the young girl’s ears caught her off guard. They were not like those she had come to know. They were different, very different. She turned to the kind voice, a hint of distrust painting her face. Before her was one of the legendary Ai’Bron monks, a beaming smile lighting his plump face. He nodded at her, spending less time on her eyes than on her outrageous outfit. Conscientiously, though not a common feeling for sure, the woman straightened her black corset and pulled up her fishnet gloves. “Very new I see…”

He brought his heavy hand up, reaching out to pat her on the shoulder. The monk moved in closer, getting a good look at her face, and craning his neck to take in her small tattoo as well. When his eyes returned to hers they were glowing slightly. Chizu, unsure of what the fabled monks could and could not do, took an unsteady step in retreat. “An Akashima native? I only assume do to the unique facial structure and the general figure you have. Perhaps your own language would be better for communications? Not sure if you understood my common…”

“No, great sir.” the woman responded, her tongue polite and respectful despite her true persona. “I am gifted with both tongues. It is assumed that all speak both, and therefore quite a necessity in these days of broad travel. You simply… caught me off guard.”

“Well then, we should get you into a room, get you introduced to the Citadel!” The man wasted little time in moving the woman, pushing her – as if against her will – towards an awaiting battle, and a new world.

~__~

Miharu Chizu-Miki, better known as Chizu, blinked away the sudden light and dizziness that trailed her as she flashed into the awaiting arena. She eyed the new world, as if she had been transported into the depths of a confusing dream. Those slate-white eyes danced across the scene, taking as much in as possible. Years of training had given her the advantage of being able to absorb and collect data on a place chosen for battle in the matter of moments.

It was a lush emerald color. The vibrant jade and deep forest greens were only heightened by the sharp and heavy light that flitted through the thick canopy. Trees were thick; light brown in coloration, with roots like younger trees spread out around their trunks. “Cyprus,” she sighed as she took her first, tentative step forward. “That means…”

Before her words could even escape her thin lips, her two inch heel broke through the thin mire layer. A squelch was the only report, but combined with the feeling it was by far enough. A swamp was the grounds that the monks had chosen. It was, she thought as she forced her way through the mire, by far the last setting she would have personally chosen. Limited mobility, the wafting smell of mold and still water, humidity that had already forced a bead of sweat from her brow; she just wanted to get the battle over with and move on…

[sdwdrake]

Crum smiles evilly as he walks through the massive gates and starts towards one of the gates wanting to get in a fight as quickly as possibly, he was itching for a kill. One of the monks approaches Crum trying to intercept the ‘child’ before he got himself killed, Crum has been here before and had made a…impression on some of the monks…and the one who was approaching Crum was one of them, as soon as he recognized Crum he turned around and went looking for someone else to help.

Crum walked to a door at random, thinking one as good as the next, but as soon as he entered the grounds that they where going to fight in he quickly became extremely pissed off, the smell of the swamp hit Crum like a punch in the face, the area was not one that Crum favored, he preferred open ground where he could put all of his massive strength behind each powerful strike.

In the distance Crum heard someone else in the swamp, beautiful, this person was going to be his first victim.

[Whiteshadow]

((Ok, thanks guys.))

Whiteshadow dashed high above the trees of the swamp, keeping the high ground. The monk that had brought him here had been forceful and, like himself, new to the Citadel, pushing the experiment forcefully into this new arena. Dweia spent her time riding on his back with her claws deep into his coat to ensure she didn't fall off.

As soon as he entered Eternium knew he was not alone, and immdiately all his hunger and anticipation melted away as a quiet calm came over him, even though his brain was racing with possiblities. He opened his mind, gathering as much information as he could, a white streak above the darkness of the swamp below. However, he could see spots of intense light where the sun broke free and struck the ground, and he knew he could make use of those spots.

He landed softly in one of these gatherings of light, and his cool deameanor searched the sorrounding darkness intently. Someone was out there...no, more than one person, he could sense. Calculating this in his brain, he figured that they would all be against one another, so...

Suddenly he heard a crash behind him and saw something vaguely human-shaped in the darkness beyond. "So there you are..." he whispered, and Dweia, the cat sensing his intent, jumped off and ran away.

He stared after the cat and smiled. She knew when to leave, he would give her that. She never got in his way. Turning to the shape once more, he raised one white hand up in the light, and immediately four swords of glowing golden light seperated themselves from him and spun in a circle around his body, points facing outwards. He pointed to the shape calmly with one finger and one of the swords stopped moving and shot itself at the figure, cutting a swath through the darkness.

[Eyes of...]

With a touch of fitful rage, the young woman slammed a clenched fist into the muck. Instead of a splash, despite its fluid texture, it gave a simple plomp response. The top layer of the swamp did ripple, and with it the grime lapped against her leather pants. She cursed the monk that had thought putting so lovely a lady in so grimy a place. Her pants would be ruined if they did not clean them properly; she would kill someone if they weren’t.

“Fuckin’ swamps,” she murmured as she slowly tugged her way out of the swampy and took to the land once again. She let he her face draw blank, her concentration overtake her, and her alert eyes piece through the shady wetland. Overhead was the sun still, piercing the shade and giving little light. But there was something in them… a heavy shadow.

Covering her eyes, she looked into the air, looking for what the problem was. What she found astounded her. It was a figure of a person, resting high in the forest canopy. How he gained such a footing was unknown to her, but it mattered very little. She took more interest in the fact that no noise of wildlife protruded in on their battlegrounds. If there had been animals, the scream of the disturbed birds would have risen to her ears long before he could have claimed his perch.

“How am I supposed to get up there?” She pondered as her eyes scanned the area. The Cyprus trees were the only trees available to her sight. Their thin barked, high branches, and wide trunks were going to be impossible to climb up. The precarious battlegrounds within the boughs of the trees was far from a wonderfully impressive place to fight. It would be too unsteady, too reliant on balance and timing. She could claim strength in both, but her combat style would be slowed and clumsy instead of quick and graceful. “Perhaps he’ll come down here? Unless he has ranged attacks, which would be a bitch…”


((These comments were made specifically as assistance to them, since I joined to help. I can leave them if it'd desired by both companies engaged in this. Since I now have Whiteshadow's opinion I am only waiting for sdwdrake's opinion. I apologize to the mod's for the inconvenience and hope that you see it as assistance and not BASHING their writing or their characters.))

((Whiteshadow: When you open up the battle, try and put something into it. A reason he’s there, why he’s in Corone, you can even throw in current events that are going on. Also, when you continue posting, make sure the readers knows where you are, and how you got there. Your above the trees? There is a canopy, how are you above them? You don’t fly, or have any flying mount… make sure your posts are a bit more detailed. Finally, when you attacked, you never described who you were attacking, where they were, or what they looked like. If you opponent has not given you enough info to make those details in your post, check their profile to help you. You can at least make the sexual difference, since Chizu is female, and Crum is male.

Sdwdrake: You had the same thing with your intro, make sure you get something in about what they look like, how they got there, why they are there… Also, try using pronoun’s. Crum did this and Crum did that is alright, but not for every sentence. Possibly ‘the half-drake/dragon’ or the ‘mercenary’… must make sure you set it up a bit before you throw in pronouns so that the reader knows that you are the merc, or half-dragon. Also, be careful with your word use. In the first paragraph you started in present tense—“Crum smiles…”. The first sentence of the second paragraph you changed to past tense—“Crum walked”. Either the first should have been Crum smiled, or the second should have been Crum walks.

Both of you should watch for descriptions of what you are doing… and who you are. Don’t forget to describe your characters, or the area you are in. Don’t force the reader to look at your profile to get all that info, takes away from the flow of the story and from your own description score.))

[Whiteshadow]

((Remember, "Eyes of..." --This is open ended. Had this been a one on one Citadel battle, I would have done such things, but as I do not know who is going to be involved or who is going to continue posting, I could be shooting at a tree shaped like a man for all I know. Its up to the others to decide and react appropriately. And the beginning, like I said, I purposely left open ended and not set to one thing. I know it says it is usually the first poster's privelige to pick and such, but I relinquished that on purpose to leave others to that. I'll leave the remarks on "dashing high above the trees of the swamp" alone because you do have a valid point there. But - part of writing and reading is leaving things to the imagination. Would you, as a reader of a fantasy book, like to read every single step of Frodo's existence in Lord of the Ring's? Or would you like to know every single thought and step of the journey Richard took in Wizard's First Rule? As a reader and writer myself, I know I would'nt. Maybe Eternium climbed up a tree and took the high ground there. Maybe he didn't go far, only leaping from top to top, before noticing that spot. In anycase, I do not feel it is fair for you to judge every single mistake someone makes, and especially not in a thread. If you have complaints or concerns, please contact me and Swdrake via PM or Email, not through a thread.))

Thank you. ~Seth Rahl~

Edit: I appreciate that you are trying to help. Just please next time talk to us in PM. You do not need to leave, please mods ignore the OOC stuff and continue to read the thread itself.


The blade of light shattered the figure, and Eternium stared in surprise as chunks of wood flew out from the darkness. Damn, it was just a log! He cursed himself silently, and dashed out of the light, his three glowing blades flying with him protectively. He moved quickly away from the clearing with speed bred from the shadows and his own slight fear that he had given his position away.

He hit another such clearing running and didn't stop, grabbing two of his blades of light in each hand. His trajectory was a tall tree with a canopy above, and immediately his senses screamed for him to get up there. Without hesitating, he leapt up the tree with a graceful bound and planted one foot after another as he sped up the tree.

When he reached the canopy he immediately threw himself into the shadowy part as much as he could, and his third blade, which had been hovering above him the entire time, dissapeared as he prepared himself for anything. Body still, he calculated the air and the strange silence of the swamp, and soon enough he heard someone pass beneath the canopy. "Fuckin' swamps..." he heard a surely female voice curse beneath the tree, and the experiment held his breath. But then he saw a slim figure step into the clearing, and for a moment he forgot he was in battle for he was transfixed by her beauty. Wearing black leather, this creature emanated both death and beauty from her body like tangible strings of a razored spider web. Twin tatoos decorated her body, and her fists were covered in grime but that still did not hide that fact she knew how to use them. At this sight, he accidentally let his held breath out, and that was his first mistake. She immediately turned towards the sound, and his body tensed as their eyes met.

"Damn it..." he whispered, and dashed out from the canopy above the woman with both glowing swords in his hands. He landed quickly behind her and stabbed the ground with one blade, then used that to be a hold as he swung one white-cloaked leg at her head.

[sdwdrake]

Crum was looking around in disgust as he crept toward the girl, the smell of the swamp was nauseating to his powerful sense of smell, and the girl was oblivious to him…at least as far as he could tell. Crum’s battle lust made him feel an urge to charge and lay low the foolish woman, but he had other plans for her…he was planning to play act at being a scared and pathetic young boy who needs some protection from whatever is out there.

Crum’s plans never came to fruition when she began to engage another opponent, the moment he had hoped for had passed, but he wasn’t done yet he could still have some fun with these two, blood was a beautiful thing to watch spray through the air. Slowly Crum made his way towards the edge of the clearing, they would never see him coming.

Crum had a love of battle but he wasn’t stupid, he knew his opportunity to strike would present it’s self soon…

[Eyes of...]

((White, please don't bunny my character.)

Chizu watched in awe as one of the four swords of light he commanded, seemingly at will, split through a lone stump. Perhaps its shadowed hiding place had caused him to mistake it for a person. Perhaps it was only a show of power. Either way, his advantage with the blades was broken. She knew their range, strength, and power… or at least thought she did. In preparation she brought her fists up and waited for him to approach.

For half a second her slate eyes danced across the moss covered trees and slime covered pools. In that split second she lost contact with her opponent. When she turned back he was missing, no longer in her sight. The light from overhead blinded her, and covering her face was helping very little. The only aspect of the battle she could safely assume was that the figure causing the shadows was no longer in the light, no longer waiting overhead. He had dropped down as she had wanted, but she had not paid heed to where he had fallen.

Cautiously she turned. Her knees bent slightly, her arms brought up with open fists, she was prepared to fight, but not ready for any surprises. “Damn my ignorance,” she muttered as he waited, watching. It was the slightest of sighs that made her start, mentally at least. Her body was as calm and lucid as ever, but her mind was racing. If her hard eyes could claim pupils, they would have been roaming shooting from heavy tree to simple branch.

When she turned and locked eyes with the man, they could not betray her. There was no compassion, no surprise, and most of all no fear. In either hand he wielded the soft, blades of light. His garb was a simple white cloak, scrawled across by unique black markings, unmarred by the area – yet. Chizu’s eyes barely met his light blue eyes before he lunged.

“Reckless,” she thoughts. He did not wield his weapons, but instead his body. That was where he went wrong, she had the advantage in hand to hand. As his leg swung towards her she spun. She used a hidden, nearly unknown style of combat dubbed Aka-Wa in the Akashima tongue. It was the way of the “Red Peace”. A hand to hand combat style that wielded the spirit of the user, allowing them to strike quickly, accurately, and dangerously. Each strike could sever nerves, cut off feeling, delay and eventually kill an opponent.

With a quick flash of movement she spun, kicking her own foot at the attacking limb. Instead of extending her spirit, she was attempting to move her opponent’s attack out of the way and close quickly. The closer the better. The closer she was, the easier it would be to strike, and the harder it would be for him to wield his sword.

[Whiteshadow]

((!!I did? Oops. My bad. Can you tell me where?
Wait, it was when you "turned around", right? I'll be sure not to make that mistake again.))

Eternium's eyes widened it shock at the woman's speed, and he was glad he had not followed through with his attack, lest he be injured himself. As soon as he saw her spin and kick at his own leg, he reversed direction, relying on his martial art skills to push himself off from his hold on the light blade and into the air. He adjusted quickly as her attack barely missed him, and he could feel the deadly power in that strike even though it had not even brushed his skin.

Still in the air, he spoke. "Senbonzakura" He said in a voice different from his normal friendly, reckless tone. "One Thousand Cherry Blossoms." As soon as he spoke these he landed on the ground a few feet away and threw the other blade at the woman, but dashed to the left, pulling the other blade out from the dirt and throwing that as well. In the same breath he leapt above the woman, and he first put his hand into the intense light, and three more blades started circling his wrist. However, with the same speed he used before to escape, he dashed in mid-air and swiped at the woman while above her with his bladed fist.

[Eyes of...]

His motion, so quick, so deadly. He moved with the grace of a viper, staccato shifts of his fluid body. His muscles were well toned, thin and delicate. They were not that of a man, not as she knew them, not as they were meant to be. Her standards of living were yet ingrained as a picture of the perfect society constantly strived for back home, back in Akashima. The men were larger, the women smaller and docile. Her opponent was not the perfect example of a man. Not rigid enough, too soft of face, to quick, he would make a fine pet for any male whore house.

Then again, she knew she too was far from perfect. Her skin was not deep enough. Her eyes were no colored. Her face was shallow, though still held those high cheekbones that the Eastern class was known for. She had long since cast aside a servile sense of being. Long since had she given into her more primal urges, dancing the razors edge with many opponents both men and women alike. Life was not about perfection, not about whether someone was standard and like all the rest. It was about those that could rise above, those that could remain unique in a world that evolved daily and absorbed the minds and souls of any caught in its wake.

Fate would not take her.


She would not be a pawn.

As soon as the man gained his distance she too stepped back. The first thought on her mind was to charge the man, gain a closer proximity, and not allow him to hurl more swords nor wield those he held. But just as quickly as the thought arose, instinct overtook her. An adrenaline rush, as sweet as the touch of silk, shot through her. Her veins were flooded with the natural hormone, causing her eyes to widen and her mind to sharpen. Movement slowed, actions with it, but the mind was never dulled.

The first blade soared at her. The gleaming light sword did not vary its course, aimed directly at her stomach. She dropped to her back. It passed over her. Silently she cursed the man’s ability, forcing her to the grimy ground. Leaves crinkled and twigs cracked as she rolled to her flank, barely avoiding another thrown sword. In the span of a moment’s notice the swords had been thrown at her, it was by luck and quick assessment of the situation alone that she was yet alive.

The first was catching another tree, this time with a loud CLUNK as it dug deep into a heavy Cyprus tree trunk. She grinned. Those where the man’s last two, as far as she could remember and count; it was time to move into an offensive mindset. She rolled onto her stomach, summoning two spells to her two eyes. The first was her right eye, which assumed a purplish-blue coloration; it would yet be moments till the spell was prepared. The second was her left eye, which took on a deep auburn and tan coloration, which too would take time to prepare. The second would take a bit longer to summon, but would be well worth it.

She thrust herself up, her back to her opponent, and began to turn with her glowing eyes. Finally they had color; finally she would be seen for who and what she truly was. A monster. Years of degradation and let down had forced her to believe her off-colored eyes and summoned spells were what made her that which so many had feared. She only hoped the man would fear them as well.

Instead of turning, facing the opponent, fighting against him, she felt an ethereal blade tear through the side of her neck. Her eyes widened in fright. Her mouth opened, as if to say something, but no words could be brought to her normally loose tongue. Instead she leapt away from the feeling, bounded away and fell roughly into a thick bog. The mud splashed her black corset, coated her tight leather pants, and painted her face. Something had gone terribly wrong.

She snapped her entire body around, looking at the man with awe, whilst sitting in the bog without a care for her clothes. A slimy hand, most likely far from sanitary, cupped the side of her neck. Warm blood flowed freely from the open wound, slipping through the cracks of her fingers. It dripped down her neck, flowing in a stream to her open bosom and down her shirt. The man was standing before her, waiting, watching. He had another three blades of light waiting around his hand, just as the original ones had been before.

Where had they come from? How did he summon them so fast? Why did he move so quickly? The questions raced through her mind. The only answer was simple; she was done for and had lost to a warrior far better than herself. Instead of forcing herself to her feet she played along with the damage done to her neck, knowing she could summon her healing brand only once. “Shit,” she muttered, thanking whatever gods where watching to allow the blades to barely miss her jugular. It was a small twist of fate that allowed her to move at all, much less without a blade jutting from the nape of her neck.

((For the mods: I was waiting for a post from sdwdrake, hence the long wait for a post. However, since he has not posted in some time, I decided to continue one without him… I hope that the delay is not taken into consideration with the judgment))

[sdwdrake]

Crum smiles evilly as his opponents stumble into the marsh right past him, he had been watching with interest as the two combatants began to attack each other, the woman took a powerful strike in the neck, and stumbled right past him, as he sat crouched in a dark shadow, her opponent standing nearby, ‘now is the time to strike’ he thinks in glee and jumps out at the man, seeing him as the more potent enemy and wanting to take him out early.

Crum came in fast and strong with his long sword aiming for his opponent’s heart, he liked to watch his opponents fear and hate as he killed them, “DIE!” he cries as he strikes.

(…Crum wasn’t really doing anything so…I felt posting would have no purpose…)

[Whiteshadow]

((Ah I see. Please do have a more active involvement in this though, as it will be boring otherwise.))

The woman had dodged his summoned swords with skill, just as he had expected her to. What he had not counted on was her base instincts and her two strange and shifting eyes, which had diverted his attention from his strike. That attack was meant to be lethal, but yet she had managed to avert it, and immediately all of his senses went into battle. He could feel every movement, hear every breath...he saw and heard her curse as she fell into the swamp mud while looking at him with eyes of both awe and anger, and for a split second as he watched blood come from the wound he felt pity. Even though he had missed with his lethal strike, the blow had gouged a wound deep into her collarbone/neck that bled profusely against her muddy hands. If her wound wasn't attended to soon, she could die within the next hour.

While she was his opponent, he couldn't be so merciless and cruel. He stepped forward and his three blades dissaperated, and he held up his empty hands to show her that he had no evil intentions. "We both know that you have lost this fight..." he spoke calmly and simply, even though his heart was still beating crazily from her beauty. "...so lets just accept it. I want to help you..."

But before he could finish his sentance a boy charged out from the bushes with a devilish expression upon his face, brandishing a long sword towards Eternium's heart. "DIE!" the boy screamed, and thrust at the experiment.

Damn! Eternium thought to himself, and barely had enough time to duck under the blade, which the edge of it cut his arm through his coat. Ignoring the pain and the woman momentarily, Eternium pushed his body again to its limits as he sped forth and pressed two palms upon the boy's chest. "Go to hell, kid." He snarled, and as he pushed he mentatlly summoned one more blade from the light to spear down on the newcomer.

[Eyes of...]

Chizu’s eyes widened as another man burst from the depths of the swamp. Another was present, a man that had till then gone completely unnoticed; apparently by both. The sudden attack was her savior; his surprising rage was her rescue. She put her thoughts onto herself. The bloody hand fell from her neck and clenched into a fist. On the other side of her neck her tattoo began to glow softly, a light cyan coloration. As soon as it began glowing it throbbed softly, sending a rush through her wounded and battered body. The bleeding stopped. The pain began to subside. But most importantly, a newfound strength flooded through her veins, mingling with the adrenaline; becoming one.

“I have done anything but lost this fight, you fucking fool,” she yelled as the man as he ducked, his arm being slashed by the new man’s blade. He had insulted the woman, wounded her pride. She had not lost, even without the interruption; she was far from out of the fight. She was being misjudged, her prowess mistaken. It was not that he did not understand her strength and abilities that bothered her, but that he talked down to her like those of her past. He was no different than the bloody children she had grown up with, no different than the hated people of Akashima. “You’ve underestimated me already…”

She stood quickly, with a handful of the muddy muck that she had been but a second ago sitting in. With a heavy arm she threw it. The clod was aimed for the human’s face, blocking his vision, taking him out of the fight. If she was lucky the blades that he summoned would be moved off target, and would spare the – obviously – half-drake warrior. As soon as she threw it she moved aside, putting a waist high Cyprus knee between herself and the conflict.



((Sorry for the delay, I got food poisoning last wednesday, still getting over it. I also had drill all weekend... on it now though.))

[Whiteshadow]

Its okay. Sorry to hear you got food poisoning. While you were gone I made another character if you want to check her out, the account's name is Bullet Witch.

As soon as he shoved the boy Eternium sensed movement behind him as well, and saw that the woman stood now, the neck on her wound healed. She sounded pissed, saying that he had underestimated her, but he could not feel anything but joy at the fact that the fight wasn't over so soon.

"Alright, so I did. Forgive me. I shall not do it again." As he spoke she flung a handful of heavy muck at him. A good attempt, but too bad for her he was ready for something like this. He knew that she would be wary of his Summoned Swords now, and other than his other Whiteshadow ability he had no other tricks left. He quickly summoned a couple more swords of light from the sun that beamed from overhead, not even paying attention to see if the sword had struck the boy or not, and blocked the glob of with a lazy wave of his hand, one of the summoned swords swiping it away.

"But see to it that you don't underestimate me as well, he said, and dashed over to the other end of the clearing, where she tried to hide herself, However, instead of going straight for her like he did before, he jumped to an large crypress tree and planted both feet against it, his white and black coat flowing out like a strange shadow. He pushed himself off of the tree and, with his two blades in both of his hands, launched himself from the spot like an arrow, spinning in the air while his swords acted like propellors in his hands, spinning round and round in front of him.

It was an attack meant to rip his opponent to shreds. He didn't know if it would work or not, but it was worth a try.

[Eyes of...]

The man was quick, dodging and attacking at the same time. His blades missed the boy, but the newcomer did fall over and bashed his head on the ground. Chizu did not know if he was out, but he had hit much harder than most people could and continue fighting. She let her concentration drift from him to the man with the swords, more blades being commanded at the ready. He seemed to have a limitless supply of them, an advantage since they could be either wielded or thrown on impulse.

As he moved, his heavy feet falling effortlessly through the muck that separated them, the young woman’s first spell danced to life. The right eye flared to life, the spell completely summoned and ready. The purple-blue coloration filled the iris. The pupil filled and formed a heart which took up a good portion of her eye, heavy black against the violet background. If she could stop him, or avoid him long enough, she could cast the charm spell and attempt to hold his – undoubtedly – petty overly emotional mind in sway.

With the second eye still summoning the spell, the left eye shifting to a heavy auburn underneath with a glowing tan atop, she turned and watched. The man flitted on fleet feet, dancing through the Cyprus growth. Instead of charging her he moved sideways, out of the way, as if to flank her. But without another opponent, it was going to be impossible. She knew she could move quickly enough to counter, quickly enough to see him from the side. “Kid,” she said as he lunged off of the Cyprus knee.

He flew through the air, a whirling dervish of body and blades. They danced gracefully around his outstretched arm, his body spinning with precise control. She saw it quickly enough though, as soon as he pushed away from the knee. Instead of standing her ground and meeting him head on, she dropped and rolled to the side. The blades tore through her slowly reacting arm, ripping across the bicep. But instead of a heavy slash they simply glanced the muscle, causing her to cry out more in panic than pain.

“Your mine.” She reached out with the unwounded arm, her eye flaring a meager purple glow. The spell instantly cast, touching the man, piercing his visage and searching for his mind. She could, at the very least, convince him to stop fighting her for long enough to gain an advantage. The most Chizu could hope for was to force him to her side, against a fallen and possibly unconscious opponent.

“Please,” she said in a fleeting, desperate voice. “Help me. You’re far stronger, far faster, let us finish off the other and leave this ground on equal terms…” Her plea was strong, the emotional question un-doubtable. She could only hope he would agree to the terms and move to the half-drake, leaving her to attack him and finish the fight.

((Since drake isn't posting, I bunny'ed him out, basically... hope that's cool with the mods, just want to finish this...))

[Whiteshadow]

Just a note that I would like to add -- Eternium isn't actually all that good with his blades, at least in close ranged combat. He is more of a guerilla fighter, and this spinning move of his is more of a showy move meant to throw his opponent off balance more than it is an actual attack. So, if a good or even average swordsman were fighting him instead, they would be able to see through his attack pretty easily. I just don't want to give the impression that he is a good swordsman, as he is not.

On the other note, I don't know if swdrake is posting or not, but as he hasn't posted nor has he contacted me or Eyes I'm am going to bunny his character and push him out of the fight. I accept any damage this does to my score as it is an unapproved bunny, but as Eyes said we need to finish this relatively soon.

Eternium missed. Yes, his blade did glance off an arm, but in his opinion as his attack hadn't connected completely he had missed and now was vulnerable. Shit!! He swore, and as he landed on both feet he turned to the woman and raised his left arm to strike her quickly with one of his blades. However, he stopped when the woman reached out with the arm he hadn't slashed, and one of her eyes that had troubled him before now glowed with a purple glow that set Eternium's mind a racing. What was it? What did it do? How could it harm him?

When she touched him he immediately jerked backwards against one of the huge cyprus trees, but as he checked him self he found nothing wrong. Still wary however and suspecting anything, he slowly got up from his leaning position and held both of his light blades at his sides like dirks, his blue eyes now glaring at the woman. "I don't know what you did, but obviously it--"

He stopped talking as he looked at the woman. She was so frail, so weary. She looked at him through sad and defeated eyes, and when she spoke to him it was filled with such a convincing overtone that the experiment was filled with compassion for her.

She was right. What was he doing, fighting a helpless opponent whom he had already beaten? And the fact that she was a woman only made him feel worse. He should be ashamed of himself right now.

"M-m-m-my apologies, my lady." He now spoke with an British accent, as his mind had reverted to a subserviance unlike him. "Your right. I shall finish him for you..." He said, and stumbled off to the fallen boy.

As he reached the boy, however, warning bells went off in his head, and he could imagine voices in his mind as they argued. One, however, seemed to come not from his mind but actually come from someone else, even though as the experiment looked around there was no one there.

In fact, it was the voice of his Father, Professor Laxton.

Fool! What are you doing!

I'm finishing off a potential threat, sir, Just as you would expe--

No, you fool! What are you doing about the woman? She is your main concern right now! Let the boy stay like that for now!

Professor, you saw how she was, there is no way she can beat me in the state she is now.

Eternium could almost feel the Professor's wrath as he shouted back at the experiment. You idiot! She's tricked you! Use your head! Remember what I used to say to you?!

Never eat frozen cookie dough with beer?

No, besides that.

...Um, could you remind me?

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE ANYTHING OR ANYONE!! The pseudo-professor shouted, and suddenly the fog on Eternium's mind lifted as his mentor's words sunk in. "Nice try..." he murmured, sure now that the woman was sneaking up on him. "...but too bad for you I'm not truely human." As he spoke the gathering shadows of the woods sorrounded him like a black cloak, and he mentally willed himself to the spot where his true opponent was, appearing behind her in a pillar of shadow and and stabbing forth with both blades.

[Eyes of...]

Twin blades were all that the woman saw. Her single slate-white eye didn’t hold the purple glow, didn’t hold any remnants of the spell. Instead, they were glowing a soft yellow with the glimmer off the swords, a glimmer mixed of his magic and the sun’s glint. Worry etched her soft, thin face. Creases crossed her brow. The spell was weak, her hold on it slight, and her command of it even less. Though it did not require concentration, she was focused heavily on it.

He stumbled away, muttering in a submissive tone. A cruel grin lit her face, replacing the doubt and worry. Things were going to go quite well for her. Better yet, he had turned his back and moved to the young, fallen man. “Finish him, you fuckin’ idiot… finish him and let me finish you…” Her thoughts were savage, like her true persona. Her mouth was curled into a wicked sneer, and she moved slowly to follow the man.

At the tip of her fingers she summoned up her soul, her energy. Aka-Wa, the highly stylized martial arts form commonly referred to as Red Peace, was her sole focus. She had spent years learning it, time and time again practicing it. The summoning of her soul was little different than the summoning of her spells. It was instant though, but required just as much concentration, and just as much strength. It was second nature. She knew, an quick strike to the exposed nape of the man’s neck and the battle would be over. Cutting off the nervous cluster that connected to his brain would numb him, force on him a lightheadedness that he would be hard pressed to recover from.

However, just before she could move on him, before he let the twin light blades fall on the wounded and unconscious man, he turned. His face was changed, his eyes held the light of battle. He was no longer under her command, and she could feel the threads of the spell break. The man was something unnatural, something far more powerful than she and far beyond her skills.

For the first time in a while she felt fear.

The shadows engulfed him, absorbing him, embracing him like a cloak. Before she could watch and comprehend he had disappeared, and reappeared behind her. Sudden shock bit at her. She was wounded, her left arm bleeding the light crimson flood of blood. She was at a loss, her most important spell had failed her, but most importantly, she had lost the advantage of sight of her opponent. He had moved through the shadows, surprising her and taking a place behind her that she had sworn she could not have given up.

“Shit,” was the only word that passed her lips as the second spell completed and snapped as soon as she felt it. Her body was instantly turned to stone. Her eye had a whirlwind of lightning swirling through its center, taking up the point where the pupil should have been. It flashed that light, a bright and pure white, and with it her skin turned a soft tan… but the blades bit and tore. Her back was opened up, though not as nearly as much as it should have been.

She spun anyway, despite knowing the futileness of it all. She was going to die; she could feel the power of her soul drain with the blood from her arm and back. She spun anyway, unwilling to admit defeat, unwilling to give up so easily. Her outstretched arm slapped at where the man’s throat should have been, but she never turned to look, never followed to see if it was on target. It would have the same affect on his throat, if not worse, than if it had struck the exposed nape of his neck…

[Whiteshadow]

He struck true this time, but the woman had one more trick up her sleeve that he had not been expecting, and he could almost feel his mentor shouting at his incompetence again before he saw her skin change to a stone-like texture that seemed to absorb some of the blow from his twin blades. However, the damage had been done, he could see that at least, from the the blades as they ripped into her back and red blood began spilling out. As she spun to the ground, he saw her eyes once more, and immediately his attention shifted to the brownish eye and he saw that she had casted a spell. Huh, a futi-- He barely thought before one powerful hand swept up and slammed him in the throat.

He was dizzy as it was. To say that summoning so many swords and then performing his Shadow Step didn't have any affect on him would be a lie, as not only those but the continual pushing of his body had pushed it beyond its limits, and now it would be his downfall. The hand, augmented by the spell that had turned her body to a stone substance, lifted him clear off the ground and sent him flying a few short feet, straight into the body of another huge cypress tree. His head snapped backwards with the impact and hit the tree as well, and the same darkness that he used and feared settled into his sight as he began to lose conciousness. "N-not...bad....woman..." He managed to work out of his damaged throat before the darkness took him as one of its own, and his body slumped to the ground in defeat.

It started to rain.

[Eyes of...]

She could feel the strength of the rock-like skin strike heavily against his neck; feel the extensions of her spirit slip through the man’s neck. The blade of soul bit deeply, striking his nervous system, reverberating through his throat. But the victory meant little in the long run. It left her with a sour taste on her tongue, and a deep hatred for an unknown opponent on her mind. She finished her spin, watched the man’s head slam firmly against a tree. His eyes lost the passion and lust for battle. The light of the swords faded and dispersed into nothingness.

The sickly grin on her face was slowly twisted with the pain of the wounds. But the finality of the fight pleased her. She slumped to the ground and crashed on her side, turning to avoid her back. The blood slipped from her wounds freely, effortlessly. The soft rock coloration faded and returned her body to the tanned tone of an Akashima native. But it was her death that she felt, the fading of spirit and soul from her body.

As she laid her head on the ground the world surrounded her. Overhead she watched the soft, sullen clouds roll over and block out the light that flitted into the dark Cyprus alcove. The heavy humidity of the sudden storm caught her chest and filled her lungs. The slick scent of the muck and mire filled her nose and caught her lungs, causing her to inhale roughly. It was the metallic tinge of blood mingling with the methane of the rotting swamps.

“My name,” she said with batted breath and through clenched teeth, “is fucking Miharu Miki-Chizu, not… fucking… woman.” She lied down, and let the world pass and the Ai’Bron do their work. The light drops of rain tapped against her still corpse, a delicate and muted remembrance of a warrior and a battle hard fought.

[Whiteshadow]

Eternium was sitting across from his old mentor. The old man had a smile on his lips and some tears in his eyes. They sat together in the darkness, and even now the experiment could feel the opressive cloak of it around him, constantly seeking to suffocate him.

"Why are you crying?" He asked the old man quietly. His head was bowed. He knew the old man was dissapointed in him for losing the match. He had been trained better than that. "I'm sorry that I lost..." he murmured, and his hands, clenched together, squeezed as he became angry at himself. "...I'll train harder, more, for next time."

Professor Laxton laughed. Eternium looked up in surprise to see that the old man was laughing at him, and suddenly the experiment was very afraid that he had lost his mind. But then the man wiped his eyes as he finished chortling, and looked Eternium directly in the eye like he always did before, and held his gaze. "Boy, you may have lost down there--" he said quietly, and pointed down at the darkness below. "--But up here is where it really counts." He pointed to his own head this time. "As long as you believe you can win, you are never a loser in my books, and you never shall."

"But--"

"Eh! No buts!" the man shouted, holding up one blue-veined hand in the air, his glasses flashing. "Eternium, what have I always told you?"

"Never to eat frozen cookie dough and beer together?"

"Other than that."

"Never underestimate anyone, or anything?"

"Other than that one too."

Eternium scratched his white hair. "...To never give up?"

The old man almost looked red faced, but then he smiled as he reached for Eternium's head. "Yes, that was it. You can--"

"--wake up now." A new voice intruded upon Eternium's head, and suddenly bright light filled his eyes. He opened them foolishly and then quicly covered them again as the light poured down. "Give me five more minutes..." He murmured sleepily, and almost rolled oven when a huge screech filled his ear and he felt something claw at his stomach.

Opening his eyes quickly, he rolled back over and squinted at an irritated Dweia, who glared at him with pompous green eyes and began licking down the patches that he had haphazardly messed up. He heard a male voice laughing, and saw one of the monks running the Citadel there, cluctching his stomach in mirth.

"....ugh..." Eternium said sleepily before sitting up in the white bed and ruffling down his silver hair. "...How'd I get here?"

Once the monk stopped laughing, he answered the experiment. "You and the woman were found lying unconcious, and it is our duty to revive and restore any wounded warriros who come here."

Eternium's eyes widened. He didn't know that. What sort of magic users were these monks anyways?

"In any case, we were unable to find the half dragon that went down there too." For a moment the monk looked troubled, but then his expression lightened again. "Well no matter. Its not my problem in any case."

"Where's the woman?" Eternium asked. He wanted to talk to her.

The monk pointed to the side of the experiment, and immediately Eternium saw that she was lying in a bed similar to his, save for the fact that she was still unconcious.

"She'll wake soon." Said the monk, almost as in response to his thoughts. "If you want, you can wait in there for her." He pointed to a set of doors leading to a small room, also in pure white.

"Nah, its alright." He stared at her still body, and noticed that her face still held a countenance of both fear and anger. "More than human indeed..." He whispered, then turned swiftly to the monk. "Do you have a quill and paper?"

The monk nodded. He had seen this done before, and had carefully set up both a quill and paper on a small table next to the beds. He pointed towards the table, and Eternium bowed in respect as he said, "Thank you."

After he was finished writing, he set the quill down and rolled the paper up, handing it to the monk when he was done. "Give this to her when she wakes up, will ya?" He smiled rougishly, and swept up a meowing Dweia before his white-cloaked form dissapeared through the doors.

The monk waited for this before undoing the parchment and reading the message. He did so not out of spite but out of plain curiousity, for the strange warrior intrigued him. It said,

To my opponent,

Thank you for giving me a real battle. I did not mean any offense before and I apologize if wounded your pride. If you would like, I would like a rematch sometime myself. I'll be around from time to time, although I usually stay around the city of Scara Brae.

Your opponent,
Eternium.

The monk smirked. Oh, this one would be in a world of hurt once she read his letter. He knew a prideful warrior/warrioress when he saw one, and this one reeked of not only pride but the power to back it up.

He sighed and rolled the parchment back up, looking like it had never been opened before. And then he began to get to work on the woman, trying to bring her from that safe place called sleep.

My ending post. Mods, I don't request any spoils, just exp and gold appropriate. Eyes of said she has no ending post.

[Witchblade]

As a note, I will not be including sdwdrake in this judgement as he only posted three or four times and I do not believe that is sufficient to give him a proper battle judgement. It would be filled with plenty of 0’s due to his inactivity. I will give him a little experience for the effort though.

Seth:

Storyline

Continuity: - 7 It was your characters first time to The Citadel, but it lacked the amazement that most people tend to give their characters when they fight in such a place. Also, I didn’t truly understand why Eternium was in The Citadel, either just for fun, some practice or even curiosity. It was never truly explained. Try to give it a bit more meaning next time. Though I really did enjoy the end where you threw in that bit with his father the professor. I felt it really did a good job of summing it up.

Setting: - 7 There was definitely a lack of description on your behalf, but for a change you used the setting to your advantage numerous times. You were after all in a forested swamp area and your character definitely used the trees. However, you forgot about the fact that the ground was exactly solid and running and moving in semi muck is not that easy. Still, in the opening post you didn’t describe a single thing about The Citadel except that it was ‘soaring over his gaze’.

Pacing: - 5 It seems like the two of you—Eyes Of…--and yourself had a bit of a problem with some posting that greatly affect the pacing and flow of the battle in the beginning. Things that had already happened were being retraced that shouldn’t have been and I—as the reader—was getting just a little bit confused. Not to mention this tended to kill the tension. Also, the fact that your character barely got hurt until the very end killed the tension as well. Even though this was a level zero vs. level zero fight, it felt rather one-sided.

Character

Dialogue: - 8 Your dialogue is at times rather cute, especially the part with the frozen cookie dough and beer. I also found it to be true to the character and it flowed in a way where your descriptive writing does not. You definitely have a better knack for writing dialogue than you do general descriptions and interactions.

Action: - 3 Okay, I’m going to have to murder you here several times, Seth. You are level zero, keep that in mind and never forget it. This is not an episode of Bleach, also try not to forget that. I have no idea how your character can jump above Chizu, because even having slightly enhanced agility and speed won’t give him that ability. Also, how can you move through the treetops so easily without losing your balance and falling to your death? You’re overpowering your speed and agility to the point where it’s a little ridiculous. Try thinking more realistically, especially with your moves. It’s extremely hard to break a kick off mid-attack, near impossible and I’m not sure I want the explanation on how you can somehow dash around mid-air.

Persona: - 7 I happen to like Eternium as a character. He comes off as a rather interesting person, especially his internal workings and you definitely have a good grasp on him. Just be careful of sudden changes of mood. You need to bring together the entire thread as a whole, not just what’s happening in that post. Remember what he was feeling the post beforehand and slowly ease him out of the emotion. Don’t just shock, bam him out of. It’s jarring to reader.

Writing Style

Mechanics: - 7 Watch your tenses and also some of your word placements. There’s the occasional misspelled word and grammar mistake here and there but nothing that I truly feel the need to point out.

Technique: - 6 Your writing technique is still in development, but so far I’m rather enjoying it. You definitely need to work on those actions though and perhaps some of your wording. Maybe your character isn’t as strong as people think he is, but your writing suggests that he is quite powerful. So be careful of the way you words things.

Clarity: - 6 It was clear, but your actions need to be clearer. I’m sure some of the confusion with you overpowering your character could be cleared up with better word choices.

Wild Card: - 5 I enjoyed it, just try to minimize the OOC stuff in a IC thread, or edit the post and get rid of it when it’s no longer necessary. That’s what I do with OOC stuff, otherwise it kind of distracts us judges and breaks up the flow.

Total: 61

Eyes of…:

Storyline

Continuity: - 7 Your opening post set the character up nicely as an introduction, but didn’t really give too much of a background on her. You tend to learn little bits and pieces about her as the battle continues, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I kind of liked it, telling just enough to intrigue the reader yet never enough to give everything away.

Setting: - 7 You had the most setting in your posts, it was there, you described it but it felt a little dead to be. It was more like you were talking about some picture hanging on a wall and not the environment your character was interacting with. And you did interact occasionally. Having your character hide behind a log at one point in time, splash around in the muck a bit and curse the grim covering her pants and corset. But like Seth, you two forgot about the muck you were fighting on and that it would slow you down. The only time you remembered was to pick some up and throw it at Eternium.

Pacing: - 4 As I mentioned in Seth’s judgement, you two had a bit of an issue in the beginning of this that greatly affecting the pacing. Eternium exploded a log with his sword and then ran away. You posted something about your character wandering around, then Eternium posted in which he attacked you and you retraced to his other post about seeing him explode the log. That just kind of threw the reader for a real loop and not to mention killed the pacing and the clarity for those few posts. Other than that, considering Eternium’s ending post I would have liked to see your character wake up and actually read the note he gave her. Since she didn’t, it felt as if the battle wasn’t entirely finished in my mind. The conclusion was left hanging a bit.

Character

Dialogue: - 8 Your character swears a lot… and I like it. It really suites her and comes off quite well. Swearing isn’t as easy as most people think it is to pull off in writing, because if you use it too much then the reader grows annoyed with it. However, you did a good job emphasizing what was really annoying your character. Also, your dialogue had a nice flow to it that felt real and not forced in any way.

Action: - 8 Your characters actions seemed true to me. They were clear and precise and you never overstretched yourself during the battle. I didn’t actually get to see very much fighting from your character as she was mostly getting hurt or trying to avoid the many, many attacks from Eternium.

Persona: - 7 Chizu comes off as a rather strong willed female character that can take care of herself and hates anyone that gets in the way of that, or puts her down. Basically, she came out rather nicely in the quest and it would have been nice to see her reaction to Eternium’s letter.

Writing Style

Mechanics: - 7 Watch out for awkwardly wording your sentences. Also be careful of short and clipped sentences. They can be good in tensed situations, but when not needed it’s best not to use them or they come off as a little jumpy.

Techniques: - 7 Your writing style is interesting but sometimes you word things in just such a way that it’s awkward to read, even if your head. Try to watch out for that.

Clarity: - 6 Clear, what else can I say? Just communicate with each other more so your posts don’t get all mixed up.

Wild Card: - 6 Though I thought it nice of you to try and give Shadow and Drake some pointers during the battle, it’s best not to unless they ask for them. Some people may find it offensive or even rude to do something like that, even if you are just trying to help out.

Total: 67

And the winner is Eyes of...!!!

Whiteshadow receives 150 experience and 100 GP!
Eyes of… receives 550 experience and 100 GP!
Sdwdrake receives 50 experience!

[Sighter Tnailog]

EXP Added!
Gold Added!