The Mean streets of Underwood. ((Closed))

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

((Note: this is a real battle so be prepared with an alternate method of recovery for your Character should they get injured dude))

The note was in his pocket already. Alberdyne Cormyr stepped out of a busy work day in the Sleepy Willow smith shop for a breath of fresh air. He had no idea how much time had passed since last he ventured outside of the smith shop. He guessed it's been several days. He took a cup of cold water from a nearby well and splashed the water all over himself. The water streamed down his person cooling off his tired muscles. He was getting bigger and stronger with each day he worked the smith. With his trusty hammer at his side, and his melee batons at the ready, the youth was prepared to face whatever challenges he needed to.

He recently forged himself a common quality Iron Short-Sword as a side weapon using the resources of the Sleepy Willow. The note was from his adopted Father, a Master Smith named Karxen. The heavy set youth set the cup he was using upon a barrel that stood outside of the shop. He looked over to the Cocnordia Forest. After cleaning his face and washing his mouth out he went over to the house that he was staying at. Karxen's guest house where many others stayed besides Alberdyne. Alberdyne preferred using his House of Sora alias these days. He'd convinced himself that he'd left his former name behind.

The past was the past. Changing into his newly acquired leather clothing and Vlince cloak, the youth looked at himself in the single mirror of his room. He'd walked all the way to the guest house in a short amount of time as he prepared for a trip into the Concordia Forest. He grabbed his equipment and some ration kits just in case he needed the extra supplies. He fitted everything into his travel packs and made his way out of the house. There, a girl named Jessa Reyes awaited him with a look of concern on his face.

"Hey where are you going Alberdyne Cormyr?" She asked calmly, her arms folded afore her chest.

"I have to run an errand for Karxen." He said in response. "I don't have much time to talk Jessa I need to be going.

"Can I come with?" She asked.

"Not this time, I have to deliver a package to someone working one of the lumber mills in the forest. This has to be done solo. I hope you don't mind but you can accompany me on the next trip I go to."

"All right Alberdyne. But you be careful."

"I will be. Oh and Jessa, its Corona now. Dyne Corona. I've left that old life behind."

*************

Concordia Forest surrounded the youth as he walked alone into its depths. He knew that many dangers lurked in the forest but he was unafraid of what lurked within. Bandits, and refugees fleeing Corone's Civil War were once again taking up residence in the Forest where once the Bandit Brotherhood lurked. Where once and old threat gathered, a new one rose to replace it.

That's the way Althanas worked. One threat replaced another threat and the war between good and evil never ceased. Dyne Corona walked in silence for a time and stopped when his thirst caught up with him. He took out a jerkin filled with fresh water from Underwood's well. He took several long pulls of the refreshing cold water and sighed with temporary pleasure. The calls and sounds of animals from various parts of the Forest's many section touched his ears.

From the corner of his eyes he swore he could see a Phantom or thrice. The young apprentice continued his journey after the quick pause, moving closer to his destination in the Forest. The particular lumberjack mill he sought was only a few hours away from Underwood, it shouldn't be that dangerous a trip. Or so Dyne thought.

Lecherous eyes observed the precarious youth as he traveled by himself through the dangerous ecosystem.

[MetalDrago]

MetalDrago had seen many people enter the Concordia Forest ever since the civil war began. It was unfortunate that the Corone Empire was going to fall, but it was just another one of the things that had gone wrong since Terramat had escaped from his dimensional prison. MetalDrago idly wondered whether or not Terramat had anything to do with the war now plaguing Corone.

He had long since given up on chasing down Terramat at his Black Crystal Palace. It was the one place too protected and unlikely for MD to start looking again. Reiana, Seraius, and Terramat had easily handled him the last time he went into the Black Crystal Palace, anyway, and MetalDrago didn’t think he was really up to giving it another try.

Absently, MD broke a twig off the willow tree he had been resting in and began to twirl it in his fingers before finally tossing it to the ground. Suddenly, the woods around him began to quiet down. Animals were evading something, that MD could tell for sure, but whether or not it was a friend or foe still had to be determined. “Oh well… I was getting a little bit bored anyway.” he said as he dropped from his branch, gliding easily to the ground.

Whoever it is has a strong aura… I suggest you be careful. Phoenix said, her blue eyes looking at her master with concern. She had been afraid for years that the man was going to get himself killed, and the episode with the Triumvirate had almost seen her fears realized, if not for that last-minute rescue. Who’d have thought that a member of the Silent Hand would prove to be such a useful ally? Makira had turned on Terramat, after having seen what he was capable of, and MetalDrago silently praised her for it, though he was certain the Maera, the leader of the Silent Hand, would definitely have something to say about it.

“I’ll be fine… You worry too much. If this person is as strong as you say, though, I suppose that I am going to have to be well-prepared.” MD said lightly, pulling his sword, the Dragon’s Honor, from it’s sheath at his side. He crept along silently, his footsteps silenced by the wet, almost spongy leaves masking his footsteps to a normal man’s hearing.

Soon after, he came upon a lone man walking through the forest. He was a heavily built man, and from the look of him, he could easily be taken as a smith, which is what MD immediately pegged him as. There was something else about him, though… Something almost familiar. MetalDrago pushed his crimson cloak behind him and stepped in the man’s path.

“You are not new to these forests, yet I have not seen you before… Who are you?” This was more a demand than a request, as MetalDrago had long considered himself the guardian of Concordia. Though he was nothing more than a mere half-dragon, he still had the pride, and some of the power, of one. To make his point even more clear, MetalDrago brandished the Dragon’s Honor, the pearl-like blade shining, despite the shade of the canopy.

Phoenix left her master’s shoulder and perched herself on a tree, to watch the play that was soon to unfold. In her mind, fighting was nothing more than a fun pastime, and if it did not come to pass, there was nothing more to be said, but the way MetalDrago’s emotions had been going lately, she would be surprised if more than a sentence were to be exchanged before he decided that it would be a good idea to attack.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

Dyne Corona heard the stories of many people traveling through the forest only to be ransacked by bandits. Blinking several times, he heard the demands of the power voice before him. Immediately, a sense of danger filled his gut hitting him like a kick to the balls. Dyne took several steps back and glanced around at the forest. Everything became very very quiet and this disturbed the youth greatly.

Dyne's hand instinctively went to his sword as he sensed the energies flowing from the individual afore him. Dyne shifted his gaze rapidly around spotting the big red bird as it left its master's side. The youth eyed it for a moment and then returned his gaze back towards the man himself. A subtle energy flowed from the stranger along with that massive sense of danger.

Dyne Corona rubbed the silver necklace on his chest and pondered activating his ring of power. The impressive sword that the man wielded showed great craftsmanship and he wondered who was the Master Smith that forged such a weapon. There was particular aesthetics that the young Smith observed about the swords. Subtle aesthetics that the only a Smith would know how to pick out from such a finely crafted weapon. Dyne sighed.

It was clear that the man intended to do him harm. He drew his own Copper weapon. A particular ringing sound filled the air around him as he drew the Copper sword. It was a short sword built primarily for speed and flexibility, the youth didn't want to be held down by a weapon that was too heavy. He spun the weapon around once in his hand already used to fighting with his unique fencing style. He went into a combat stance and stared his opponent down.

"Why should I tell YOU my name? How do I know you aren't just some knave thief?! Now I'm on a very important errand I suggest you get out of my way or I'll be forced to remove you from my path!" Dyne yelled his anger level rising gradually.

[MetalDrago]

Phoenix’s red-plumed head turned to face the person standing before MetalDrago. Her raptor claws dug into the bark of the branch underneath her. The man dared to call her master a knave and a thief? There were few things that Phoenix would willingly throw herself into a fight for, and her master’s honor was one of those things. With a screech that was almost bone-jarring in its intensity, she spread her wings and started to remove herself from the branch. Through his psychic connection to the bird, MD was able to force her to stay on the branch. He’s mine, Phoenix. he thought to her evenly.

“Me, a thief? Do you think that I would wander around a forest if I was a common thief?” MetalDrago spoke in a hiss. This person may be dangerous, but MD was more than ready for a fight. He had been waiting for one all day it seemed. It was soon to come, and MetalDrago could not have been happier about it. He would be able to give voice to his emotions through his most dangerous conduit: his sword.

However, a calm took him over as he viewed the person in front of him. It was an odd stance the person used, such as one might use with a rapier during a duel. He was facing someone who was not of mere commoner blood then. His battle-excitement took over then, and this person was no longer an enemy, but an opponent. MetalDrago would have to be careful, but he doubted that he would be in any big trouble, unless the man before him decided that MetalDrago could benefit from a bear hug.

Phoenix, allowing her eyes to stray for a moment to her master, wondered what was going on inside his head at that moment. He had blocked her, which he usually only did if he was planning on fighting completely by himself. She couldn’t believe that she was going to be left out of the battle, but it was her master’s decision, and she would stick by it. Her long, rainbow-feathered tail rose and fell with her breathing as she awaited the beginning of the battle.

A single yellow leaf fell from the canopy above, exactly midway between MetalDrago and his new opponent. “Let’s begin, if you’re so eager to be beaten.” MetalDrago said, his voice edged with child-like excitement. With those words, MetalDrago launched himself toward his opponent with a vigor unlike anything he had felt since Terramat had been released from the other realm less than a year before. His hands began to burn as his Fireball spell began its work. If the man before him tried to parry his blow, he would merely allow himself tom be pushed aside, planting his fireball directly in his opponent’s gut instead of throwing it, like he usually did.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

Dyne Corona saw that the man was determined to attempt to fight him. Was he mad? Dyne thought to himself. He saw that a glowing energy flowed from the man's hand and he knew he would have to expertly attempt to avoid by the sword attack and whatever that next energy attack might be. That sense of danger continued to flow from his opponent and as the battle began, the wind picked up from the East.

His long headband flowed with the breeze creating an artificial dual-tail behind the youth as the wind caressed him. The sword was an easy enough matter to deal with, but the energy was another task all together. He had no idea how to react to that and the immediate concern was parrying his sword attack. Again, he admired the aesthetic textures of the weapon before him and hoped that his weapon might be enough to hold up against the other's craftsmanship.

Dyne used his fencer's exquisite fighting style to interact the rough nature of his opponent's own unique combat style. He'd never seen such a fighting style before, even with his training with the Monks of Ai'bron. Thinking of all his intensive training, the youth met up with the man's lunge with a predicted parry. With some degree of finesse and skill, the the youth brought his sword up to bare.

He swung in an inward strike to try and throw his attacker off balance. He wanted to attempt to expose the his opponent's center of gravity in such a way that left his front side open if he was successful in his counter. He thought about his counter as his next move in their game. For now he worried about the basic parry. He used a significant amount of his body weight, and brought his weapon up with both of his hands. He stood in a fencer's combat stance. He mentally counted the seconds as he waited to see if his counter connected.

[MetalDrago]

MetalDrago could not recover from the parry as quickly as he had expected, and, as a result, missed his chance to send his hand into the gut of his opponent. However, the solution to such a parry was immediately evident. With a minimum of effort, MetalDrago threw the Fireball at the man, and immediately went limp.

He felt his body hit the ground before the counter actually can. It jarred him a little, but it was better than a blade making contact with his body. After he felt the blade pass over him, he was quickly on his feet. The battle was making him very excited, and he was poorly concealing it. The smile on his face was just one piece of evidence portraying the sheer amount of happy excitement that he was holding in.

"Come on! Keep it up. This is just starting to get fun." MetalDrago said, not even caring if he was heard. Phoenix knew the look in her master's eye, and it was not one she was used to seeing these days. He was having fun. A single tear rolled down her beak as she looked at her master having the time of his life. It was such a joyful experience that Phoenix forgot her anger at the man for calling MetalDrago a thief.

"Yes... I can feel it. You're not human, are you?" MetalDrago asked as he switched his stance, putting the sword level with his eyes and pointing it at his opponent in what he jokingly called his Scorpion stance. This stance was built to use a slashing attack, and most of the slashes that came from this stance were powerful, but left the attacker vulnerable for precious few seconds. "Oh well..."

Within seconds, MD was on Alberdyne. He attacked fast and hard, his sword coming down in a slash intended to cut from the left shoulder to the right armpit of his opponent. As he did so, a jet stream of flame flew forth from his mouth, the Firebreath attack jumping forward outside of MetalDrago's control. I was going to save that too… he mentally whined.

Phoenix released a beautiful song that was her equivalent to laughter. MetalDrago sharply mind-spoke to her, and she shut up almost immediately. Blasted bird… was all he thought as his sword-Firebreath combo carried through.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

His parry connected with superb effect but left him open for the next of the warrior's attack. He has power but he's going to drain himself quickly at that rate. Seeing the incoming attack, Dyne admired the level of skilled that his opponent possessed. The fireball connected dead center of his chest and burned him terribly, even past the leather outfit he wore. Dyne wore no armor except for the leather outfit and his Vlince cloak. He also had one surprise that was uniquely his own. A price he'd obtained from his single mission so far with The Syndicate.

Dyne pondered bringing up the mystical shield but decided it would be best to take on this attack head first. Dyne was growing stronger every time that he did battle but the apprentice still had to pace himself well. He was still considerably weaker than most other warriors he came across including his latest opponent. Dyne saw the strange markings of the unique fighting tactics he used and stored the mental imagery in his head.

He labeled the strange fighting stance like a Scorpion because that's what it somehow reminded him of. He observed the maneuvers carefully studying them as he thought of a way to parry them but couldn't. The pain he felt was too intense. Fires licked his chest burning the epidermis with permanent markings. Dyne was developing quite the collection of scars.

And in one moment everything went straight to hell. As if the injuries of the fireball weren't bad enough, the warrior released a powerful stream of fire from his mouth. Dyne saw the incoming slash attacks and moved with his enemy's momentum in such a way to parry the attacks with some level of skill. The fire stream did its damage and connected with Dyne FULL FORCE before Metal Drago could connect with his sword attack. The force of the impact knocked causing Dyne to nonchalantly avoid MD's breath weapon.

Dyne flew backwards several yards, knocking several trees down with him with the impact of the energy. A sonic burst connected to his chest and sent him off his feet when MD launched the breath weapon against him. He'd lost his sword when the tree fell against his body weight. Several downed trees and a lot of devastation resulted in the force of Dyne's body caused a streak of earth. As he opened his eyes from the pain, smoke touched his chest where the fires once burned. Thanks to his leather shirt, the shirt provided SOME level of insulation against the dangerous attacks.

Dyne had never encountered anything like that before. He screamed in agony feeling his flesh burning from the heat. The wizard's fire wrapped itself around the boy and licked him to his very soul. He howled in agony once more as the precious moments passed. He had to be ready but the pain was too intense for him. The youth struggled to stand and fell from the weight of his own body. Somehow, the wizard's fire sapped away his strength in a way that he couldn't even begin to understand.

Tears streamed down the apprentice's eyes. Was this the end? Dyne wondered as he clutched at his chest. Thankfully, the wizard's fire faded away after a few moments of intense agony. Dyne saw his shirt completely burnt off his flesh and a black layer of scorches where the two impact points of the wizard's fire lurked. First and second degree burns lurked all over most of his body and a third degree burn lurked over most of his chest. He clutched at it and smelled his own flesh burning. He pulled off bits of his own skin as he moved to touch his chest and screamed in agony once again.

The wizard's fire had scarred his very soul.

[MetalDrago]

MetalDrago fell back from the man before him. His fire seemed to have done an intense amount of damage, much more than what his attacks were normally able to do to anyone of any race. Only people who were weak to fire would suffer damage anywhere near the type that MD's opponent had.

"What did I do to him?" he asked piteously. He felt his sword beginning to fall from his hands, but he held it tight. It was impossible for him to let his guard down in this forest, even when his current opponent was in such a weakened condition. As he walked over to the man he had seared with his most unforgiving attack, he winced. "If it hadn't been for that sword attack, the fire would have killed him, I'm sure of it."

Phoenix flew down and perched upon the shoulders of her master. She stroked her head against MetalDrago's neck, and a tear went down her beak. Without some kind of medical help, the man would probably die. MetalDrago nodded at her, and she knew what he intended to do.

"Are you so badly hurt that you cannot walk?" MetalDrago asked the man, his voice filled with compassion. No one who fought in such a way deserved to die because of a lucky accident on the part of the victor. "Look, if you can't walk, I can carry you. I may not look strong, but I can carry you back to town, unless of course, you'd prefer to keep fighting looking like an overdone steak?" MetalDrago couldn't mask the irony in his voice as he said this. He had been like this once before himself. He couldn't remember much about who saved him, but he was going to make sure that the chance he had to save anyone else would not be passed up.

If the man was okay to walk, MD would help him walk to Underwood. It wasn't that far away. However, if he could not, MD would have to carry him to Underwood. How he was going to explain to the doctors there how the burn scars got there eluded him, but he would be able to think about it on the way. Damn... Who'd have thought my natural strength would be this kid's weakness?

It's not your fault, master... How could you have known? was Phoenix's response. She knew that her master would probably have nightmares about this for the rest of his life if he was unable to help this man. Silently, so that even MetalDrago could not hear her thoughts, she wished that this man, this fighter who was weak against fire, would live. For the first time in her entire life, she wished for something with her entire being, besides being with MetalDrago for the rest of her days.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

The wizard's fire did something to Dyne and altered him at his very core that day. He would never quite be sure what that something was, but something fundamentally different assaulted the youth from within. Dyne had a core view of himself as just another person until the day his mother, Alma Cormyr betrayed his family and made him into the monster that he was. He knew somehow that he was no longer the same. Making matters more complicated was the fact that he'd just encountered huge amounts of archaic forces.

This DID something else to him. Something he wasn't prepared to accept. It made him question his mortality and question his own sanity. An attack that should have killed him straight out had done nothing more than severely wound him. Furthermore, the attack adjusted his core. Adjusted his very soul in a way that was profound to him. The forest around him moved and flowed in a psychadelic sort of way until it altered completely afore his field of vision. Dyne saw something he wasn't prepared to see.

The Firmanent changed vastly and became the Anti-Firmanent. He saw the Concordia Forest only it wasn't the Concordia Forest. It was a grey, lifeless field of bleak and gnarled trees. All around him he saw a great plethora of Phantoms moving about and awaiting their final judgment. Everywhere was a gray blur. Alberdyne was able to see the world behind the world. This proved that Althanas had more than one reality to it. A term crossed his mind and he was able to correctly identify the Anti-Firmanent for what it was.

A realm of the dead. A place of lost Phantoms waiting their time. They either passed into salvation or awaited damnation when they were judged by the powers that be. Distracted by the sights he saw, Dyne hoped that none of them would notice him. He blinked several times as he felt the displacement taking him. He was the only entity that had color about him, his halo glowing a brilliant golden color about him. As he'd projected himself into the Anti-Firmanent by accident, the youth cried out in agony once again.

Several Phantoms heard the sound and approached to him moving with legs that weren't quite legs. A deceased family approached the fallen boy and a little girl, no more than six, communed with the boy. "Are you lost mister? Pappa says there aren't supposed to be people like you here. You must be lost." Dyne blinked as he stared at the little girl and then looked up to the tall man before him. "Forgive my daughter. She's young. She's still curious about everything. When we passed she hadn't had a chance to see the world yet. I was going to take her all around Corone and eventually to Akashima."

The Phantom said. Alberdyne tried to sit up straight and was able to do so despite the flaring injury. "Goodness you've been hurt badly. No wonder you're here. Your soul was confused. Someone injured your SOUL. Your soul was displaced from your body. Around here we call the living soul the Atma. You have a particularly powerful Atma young man." The Phantom that was clearly the Father reached out and touched Alberdyne on his chest, there was a brilliant flash of light. "I healed you the best I can. But this magics seems to be a part of you now. It doesn't WANT to go away. That's the way it is with the works of Wizards sometimes. Sometimes you can heal it but most time's there's always a price to pay." The man said.

"What do you want from me?" Dyne found himself able to ask. "This necklace, deliver it to its rightful owner." He handed Dyne a small amulet that glowed with a ruby in the center. "It's for my Sister. She's the only one in my family that survived the big terrorist attack a while ago." Dyne knew what he spoke about and nodded in understanding. "I'll do my best to deliver the necklace. I hope you all pass to where you're rightfully belonging." He said and the family nodded. The little girl saluted Dyne and kissed him gently on the forehead.

After that the world became psychadelic once more. Dyne felt like he was falling from a very far away place and eventually he came to. Blinking several more times, only a minute or so passed in the real world. Dyne heard someone calling him and he woke up with a start. As the physical world, the Firmanent, set itself back into normality Dyne saw Metal Drago looking down at him. Instinctively, he clutched at his melee batons and drew them out. He was terrified of the warrior who'd caused the youth so much physical pain.

"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU FREAK!" Dyne called out in anguish. He pulled out the heavy brass melee baton and swung instinctively out towards MD's jaw hoping to break it if he could. He needed a chance to reacquire his sword and continue the battle until it was over. Until either he was dead or he'd knocked Metal Drago out. He'd not heard any of MD's words of salvation and thusly had no idea of the warrior's desires. Was he friend or foe? Only time would tell. He waited to see what happened with his melee attack.

[MetalDrago]

The scream warned MetalDrago a fraction of a second too late. A grunt of pain and the sharp cracking sound of breaking bones accompanied the baton’s attack. Son of a… MetalDrago was surprised, to say the least. No one had broken any of his bones before. It was a pain so great that MetalDrago was on the verge of passing out. No! Phoenix screamed into his head, keeping him from giving into the pain. In a flash of red, Phoenix was off MD’s shoulder and back on a branch of the tree next to him.

“Damn…” he said, his voice slurred and a sharp pain running through his moving jaw. He clenched his fists against the pain and looked at Dyne in pure amazement. What the hell is he thinking? I was only trying to help him, and he breaks my blessed jaw!

Phoenix screeched as she felt MetalDrago’s anger beginning to rise. She had only seen him get angry in this way twice before. Once, right before he sealed Terramat in another dimension, and again, right after Terramat escaped. The second time, it was the most frightening thing she had ever experienced.

The rain fell in a drizzle. The sun was just visible behind the clouds, but that was not what mattered to MetalDrago at that time. What mattered was that his student, a young man who was like a son to MD, was dead, cut open sixteen different times by the Dark Lord Terramat.

Mad laughter cut through the silence as Terramat surveyed his work. “I was aiming for you, but he’ll do. You see, so much pain, and only because you care for the fools around you too much. Learn not to care, and you’ll be strong. Keep caring, and the emotions will kill you.” With those words, Terramat kicked Sephiro in the gut, making the body jump slightly off the ground.

MetalDrago could feel his anger building, and the area around him was beginning to resonate with it. Terramat’s face became drawn and paler than the almost black color it usually was. “We’re leaving. Reiana, Seraius, come with me. Come after us, and we will kill you, MetalDrago.” They were gone almost before MetalDrago’s anger could reach its boiling point.

Crouched beside Sephiro’s body, MetalDrago could see that he’d died grasping onto the Dragon’s Fury, MetalDrago’s oldest weapon. “Damn him. Terramat…will…pay…for this!” MetalDrago roared with a fury matching that of the dragons from which he was supposedly descended. Sobs wracked his body as he picked Sephiro up and carried him out into Concordia, where he was buried with the Dragon’s Fury.

MetalDrago cried for a straight week before he finally got up the strength to face the world again. He still blamed himself for the death of Sephiro Terragona, but it was not for him to decide who would die and when. That was up to the Fates. All he could do now was seek out and destroy Terramat, Seraius, and Reiana. He would bring the killers of his student to justice, no matter the cost to himself.

Back in the present, MetalDrago tried to speak. “Sephiro… I cannot lose until I have avenged your death.” Though it came out slurred, it was recognizable for what it was. MetalDrago had just renewed his vow to defeat the Triumvirate, no matter the cost.

Through the ravages of death, and the ghostly world, a cry could be heard. Standing in front of MetalDrago, facing the man known as Dyne, was Sephiro. He was not a ghost in the way that most people think of them. He was standing there, merely as he was before he died. However, if anyone were to attempt to touch him, it would come to naught. “Dyne Corona… Do not attack this man behind me any further. Do you not realize that he attempted to help you mere moments before now? He did not mean to cause those injuries. He will not try to kill you, but he will fight to live. Please, do not fight him.”

“Sephiro… why?” MetalDrago managed to say through the pain in his jaw. Sephiro, hearing MetalDrago, turned to his old teacher to answer.

“Because, you are not to blame for my death, and I love you like a father. I cannot let you die until Terramat lies dead. Not for revenge, but to stop him from extending his reach over places like this forest.” Sephiro said simply. He then turned, to await Dyne’s response.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

The situation did something NEW to Corona's powers that were unexpected indeed. A thing of incredible talent. The potential that the boy had to attract the Phantoms was beyond great. The new Phantom showed up in spiritual form, only it had color and form. It was a displaced Atma unlike any other that Dyne Corona had ever encountered before. The presence glowed brilliant with an energetic residue that flared out in a powerful halo.

Dyne had to cover his eyes when he saw Sephiro's person in such a state. Had he made a mistake? Did he really attack Metal Drago without grounds? He never had a chance to hear MD's pleas of help to the boy but he trusted the Phantoms. Phantoms had no reason to lie. They were already dead. Dyne held the Phantom family's amulet in his hand and placed it quickly in his personal travel packs.

Where he once had burnt flesh he now had recovering scars. He knew that the burn marks would be permanent. How was he going to explain his growing collection of scars to Jessa and Stacey? Dyne ignored MD for a moment and looked up to the newly discovered Phantom. Somehow, the Phantom was able to project his thoughts into Dyne's mind and whisper to him a name. "Sephiro! Sephiro is your name huh?! All right, listen, I had no idea what your teacher's intentions were. I thought he was a bandit. I was unable to see him for a bit. So when I came to I thought he was trying to do me more harm."

The Phantoms were a neutral force. Dyne knew that he could trust the Phantoms even if they were a former enemy. Dyne learned a few things that day. He learned about Terramat's evil and he learned that Metal Drago might be a considerable ally. He sighed at his mistakes and forced himself to stand up, no longer feeling the pain. He instinctively grabbed at his chest feeling the cool breeze upon its strapping, exposed form. He was lucky that he'd put on the amount of muscle that he'd managed to pack on working as a black smith.

With the Phantom in front of them Dyne looked from Sephiro to MD. He would have to continue the battle another day or at least as a sparring session to train. "So you're a teacher huh? Would you mind taking up another student? That's an interesting fighting style you used back there. It reminded me of a Scorpion." Dyne said and looked at the Phantom named Sephiro. "You can go back now to where you were. I won't attack your teacher any further. I'm hoping he agrees to instruct me in his ways."

He then looked at MD. "I'm sorry about the jaw. You can get that healed in Underwood its a ways off that way." He pointed in the general direction of Underwood then relaxed himself. He kept his hand at his chest somehow still feeling the pain of the Wizard's fire.

[MetalDrago]

Sephiro laughed at the man standing before him. This Dyne fellow was something of an oddity. “As long as MetalDrago is alright, then I have no reason to stay around him.” Turning to face his former teacher, he bowed. “It is no fault of yours that I died. Just remember that.” With that, just as suddenly as he appeared, he was gone.

Bright yellow eyes scanned this event with impatience. The owner of the eyes was smiling evilly as he dropped to the ground some seventy yards away from MetalDrago. “You’d think that killing them once would be enough, but they always come back for some stupid reason or another. MetalDrago, you never really were the brightest one.” the man said, throwing his cape back and revealing a katana of mythril. “Of course it wasn’t your fault that the fool died. It was mine.” Terramat’s mouth curved up in a sinister smile as he chuckled.

MetalDrago stood back, shocked that Terramat had actually come for him instead of waiting with a trap, like Terramat usually did. “So… You show yourself, Terramat.” MetalDrago said, not caring about the pain or the slur in his voice anymore. He smile slightly as he brought his sword up into the Scorpion stance. Terramat merely laughed, and brandished his sword like a rapier.

“I’m not here to fight fool, only to warn you. Do not stand in our way again, or we will not fail to kill you. Last time we let you escape. This time, we’ll do no such thing.” With that, Terramat disappeared from view, seeming to vanish into the Shadows around him.

He always did like the dramatic side of things… MetalDrago thought, sheathing his sword. It would be no use to chase Terramat now. He was probably back at the Black Crystal Palace. MD then turned to Dyne and said, “Yeah… I’ll teach you how I use my long sword. Come on. Let’s get to Underwood.” Without saying another word, he turned and began the walk to Underwood, hoping that Dyne wouldn’t have him arrested for causing the scars which were, undoubtedly, still causing him a fair bit of pain. The boy was resilient, MD thought, as Phoenix took her customary position on his shoulder. A lot of men would have died from burns that bad, but to be healed, even that much; now that hinted at something much deeper than anything that MetalDrago had ever seen in his over two thousand years of life.

[Alberdyne_Cormyr]

((Conclusion Post))

Watching the bizarre event unfolding before him, Dyne saw the interaction between this shadowy Terramat and Metal Drago. Dyne eyed the situation for a long moment taking in all he could and preparing himself for a fight if one broke out. The youth was hot blooded and preferred a scrap to waiting around doing nothing. The Phantoms showed him a thing or two about life that day and he knew that he'd been quick to judge the situation. Dyne would not make the same mistake ever again.

The encounter cost him dearly. He rubbed his chest once more thankful that his Silver pendant and his family's heirloom necklace remained intact. Dyne was developing quite the collection of jewelry these days. He turned to look towards MD for a moment torn as to what to do next. On the one hand, Dyne wanted to go to Underwood with his newly found instructor and on the other hand he needed to complete his errand for Karxen. The Master Smith didn't like to be kept waiting while jobs were at hand.

With the forest surrounding him and trees of all sorts gathered like a congress, the youth made up his mind. "Hey Sir! I'll meet up with you in Underwood unless you want to come with me. You should really get help for that jaw. Again. I apologize for hurting you like I did, I was scared that's all. You hurt me pretty bad and I thought that I was going to die. That's why I reacted that way. If you go to Underwood seek out a blacksmith named Karxen. He's a Master Smith that works over at the Sleepy Willow. Tell him that Alberdyne Cormyr sent you." Dyne said. He pulled his leather jacket up around him and closed the zipper.

It wasn't that he was cold, he just didn't want to show that ugly scar to anyone that didn't need to see it. That burn mark was hideous. He turned and started to walk in the general direction of the lumberjack mill he needed to go to. He walked in silence knowing that MD with either walk with him or make his way back to Underwood. He'd traveled this path many times before and knew of all the small villas and mills that lurked across the Concordia landscape. They were connected to the Peregrine Group as well as Underwood. Some of the mills even belonged to local pockets of Wood Elves living in the Concordia Forests' many tree side villages.

Dyne felt incredibly thirsty as he walked. He took out his jerkin once more and took a deep pull of the refreshing cold water. The liquid felt like a blessing of the Thaynes to him. The youth continued to walk feeling the afternoon Concordia breeze. Once again the animals of the forest made various calls and sounds as they picked up their usual activity.

On familiar territory, Dyne approached the lumberjack mill and saw a well that was nearby to the mill. He filled his jerkins up with a fresh supply of water. A friendly lumberjack approached Dyne and he delivered his package to the kind man. On an instinctive movement he decided to show the amulet that the Phantom gave him to the lumberjack. The man broke down in tears when he asked where did Dyne receive the amulet. Dyne explained the situation making up a story that he found it from some bandits along the way to his mill and the man bought it. Dyne successfully delivered the amulet and the letter from Karxen. Hugging his companions, they invited him to stay for dinner and the youth decided it was a good idea after all.

A great tasting meal was a good way to end such a hard day...

The End.

************************************

((Spoils Request))

001--Archaic Scars. Burned by Wizards' fire the boy has reacted adversely to the attack. He now has terrible scars over most of his body, especially his chest where the attack of Metal Drago's fires assaulted him. The Wizard's Fire assaulted his very SOUL and left Alberdyne Cormyr with a spiritual burn as well as a physical one. Cormyr is not sensitive to magics and can eventually learn the mystic arts from the right teacher(s). For now this is just a marking upon his person. Through the Wizard's Fire, Dyne also developed an intense connection to Metal Drago. He can sense it whenever Metal Drago is around.

002--Anti Firmanent Projection. ((Astral Projection)) Thanks to Metal Drago's assault Alberdyne Cormyr unlocked one of his latent Psionic powers earlier than expected. When in times of great turmoil, the young Psionic can project himself into the Anti-Firmanent. There he can see Phantoms in their natural state and commune with them until he regains consciousness. When he is Astral Projecting, his physical body blacks out and he looks like he is in a state of deep sleep or deep meditation. He can currently only use this ability once per level. ((Locked until level 3 thank you))

[MetalDrago]

MetalDrago nodded and smiled when he heard Alberdyne mention Underwood. He had been there a number of times, and wouldn’t have any trouble remembering where that smithy was. The event with Sephiro’s phantom still had him on edge, but he wasn’t willing to show that. Beyond the vague creepy feeling of talking to the dead, there was a sense of peace that MetalDrago hadn’t felt in many years, not since his mother died.

Terramat’s appearance was the really creepy thing, though. MetalDrago would have staked his life on the fact that the Concordia forest was the last place Terramat would think to look for him. “Come to think of it, I’ve had this feeling that they knew where I was, regardless… Could this possibly be true?” MetalDrago said to himself as he walked along, whispering without moving his jaw, as to avoid aggravating the pain. He barely noticed as Phoenix took her customary perch on his shoulder.

You aren’t going to go after him, are you? Phoenix asked him, her sapphire eyes watching him with worry. She let out a songlike sigh when MetalDrago shook his head, winced, and laughed. You’d think with a broken jaw, you’d be more careful with moving your head. Phoenix admonished.

Really, Phoenix, you’re sounding more a like a wife than my friend every day. MetalDrago said. He was in a good mood, despite the troubling appearances of both Sephiro and Terramat in a single day. He would have plenty of time to think about this later, but for now he had to get to a healer of some kind. Underwood was still only a short walk away.

As animal crept out of view in the shadows of the forest, MetalDrago began to survey his surroundings. The forest played with the shadows and light as though they were living creatures, playing a game of eternal hide and seek. He absently wondered if the forces of ‘Light’ and ‘Dark’ were like that to the Thayne, merely two forces constantly trying to find and tag the other one, to make each other ‘it.’ A chuckle escaped his lips before he knew what happened. He was turning into a philosopher, but he couldn’t really care less.

As the forest began to thin out, MetalDrago saw the town ahead. He was elated to see that, even now, Underwood was, more or less, a very nice town to be in. He found the Sleepy Willow easily enough, and asked for the Master Smith Karxen without too much of a slur, and was even able to mention Alberdyne’s name without hurting himself. The person he had asked to find Karxen went to find him fast.

MetalDrago sat down, rubbed his broken jaw and wondered just what Dyne was doing right then. He figured the kid was having dinner by now, and was hoping to do much the same when he got his jaw repaired. As the Master Smith appeared, MD smiled. He explained the broken jaw as being by a band of bandits, and told him that Alberdyne helped him fight them off. He was then told that the town’s healer had been sent for, and he smiled. He was going to like being friends with this Dyne fellow, if it meant being treated this nicely. He idly wondered if he would be treated as well when not injured. Then he mentally kicked himself and told himself sternly not to worry about it. For now he was at peace, and that was what mattered most, wasn’t it?

_________________________________________
Spoils (1)
Magically repaired jawbone. A little stronger than the rest of his bones, now, thanks to the magical reinforcement. Not much stronger than average bone, but enough to make a difference between hairline fracture and completely broken.

[Witchblade]

Storyline

Continuity: - 6 Bobby, you did a good job at describing past events with your character to lead him into the very spot he’s in right now and I never felt very confused with it. However, Pavel, you kind of kept the reader in the dark about why Dyne—as he’s now called—isn’t with his true family. Even by the end of the quest I never entirely knew, you only described some kind of betrayal and his mother doing something to him, but I as the reader have no idea what it is and that’s a little frustrating. Besides that the storyline of the actual quest was…interesting. I’m not entirely certain what either of you are going to do with it or if you will continue as a master apprentice relationship, but you definitely should. I just wish the battle had been executed better, but you’ll read more about that below!

Setting: - 3 What setting? Neither of you described the setting much at all or even used it to your advantage. You’re battling in a forest! Hide behind a tree, pick up a branch, kick some leaves into your opponents face, or even trip over a jutting root or rock for all I care just use it in some way and describe it, please. I knew there were animals making various sounds, but for all the reader knew your trees could have had purple trunks and red leaves because no one described them. Heck, the only way the reader knew there were trees was because Dyne was sent flying through a few of them, you guys kept calling it a forest and when he went into the Anti-Firmament they decayed.

Pacing: - 5 The pacing was a little all over the place. There were a lot of internal thoughts from Pavel that kind of threw the reader for a ride, especially in the middle of a battle and sometimes Bobby you did the same thing. The flashback I liked, it was done in such a way that it didn’t really kill the flow of that post, but for aesthetic and clarity reasons try to separate flashbacks from present circumstances either by italicizing or separating it with a line. The both of you—though more so Pavel—need to work on the general flow of sentence to sentence to really help improve your pacing.

Character

Dialogue: - 4 Pavel, your dialogue seems very static, almost like there’s no personality in it. Try using tags that come before, in between or after your dialogue that describe facial expressions, body language or tone of voice. Just don’t use them too much, only to draw emphasis to something. Bobby, your dialogue needs some help as well, I don’t want to say it’s cliché, but it’s almost bordering on it. Not to mention it all feels the same. I can’t really differentiate dialogue from MD, Phoenix or Sephiro unless you tag it.

Action: - 5 Strangers walk around Concordia all the time, does MD jump out of trees, brandish a sword and demand the name of all of them? I certainly hope not. Oh, and I think Dyne crashing through several trees from the force of MD’s fire breath is one, quite impossible and two, would most likely either kill him or break his spinal cord.

Persona: - 4 This is a battle; a real honest to God battle with real sharp pointy objects that can kill and the person is not going to be revived because this isn’t The Citadel. So why, fully knowing this, would MD have such a drastic change of heart after connecting a move on Dyne? It seems like too much creator intervention on the character to me, either that or you just didn’t describe what was going on in MD’s head well enough for me to believe it. Both of the characters need some work to properly express their personalities; Dyne comes off a little flat, and sometimes too childish—even if he is 19. MD has drastic changes of emotion that flew around from sadness to happiness and anger, they were all over the place and not all were justified in my mind.

Writing Style

Mechanics: - 6 I’m sure both of you are at the point where you’re re-reading your posts, so I don’t think I have emphasize that. However, the two of you do need to watch your tenses. Pavel, please don’t foreshadow. I’ve read some of your other writing before and you have a bad habit of always leading the reader and telling them exactly what’s going to happen because you cannot properly foreshadow. You need to show the reader what’s going on, not tell them. And terrorist attack? That’s an odd choice of words for a fantasy forum. Are we in Iraq now?

Technique: - 6 Both of you need to work on developing your specific writing techniques with these characters. I can see them sitting there just below the surface but they need some help to get out.

Clarity: - 7 For the most part the writing was clear, but the actions of the characters were not so much at times.

Wild Card: - 5 This was an overall good idea for a quest that just didn’t come out very well once it came down to actually writing it.

Total: 51

Reward:

MetalDrago receives 600 experience and 100 GP!
Dyne receives 450 experience!

Spoils reluctantly approved for Alberdyn and approved for MD as well.

[Sighter Tnailog]

EXP Added!
Gold Added!