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Seth_Rahl
10-26-07, 10:25 AM
This poem I wrote a few years ago as a momento to an old friend of mine. It was in Creative Writing class and I felt inspired when she told us to write about a positive or negative emotion.


Regret.


I stand in the rain
feeling the pain
of loss and regret
that I had lost her again.


The rain pours down
drown out sorrow and sound
and I take the leap
as my world goes black


I awake to see her face
But it is changed somehow, erased
Is it my regret that has done this?
Or is it my regret that changes?


Lightning strikes, her tears fall
I wonder if she feels any regret at all
That she had met me too.


And once more my world goes black.


Please tell me what you think.

Celeste001
10-26-07, 11:13 AM
It's interesting... but I find it a little disjoined and hard to follow... but that's just me. I still like it!

Seth_Rahl
10-26-07, 03:27 PM
Its supposed to. Think of stream-of-conciousness, like in Johnny got his gun (the book), and thats a good example.

Cyrus the virus
10-26-07, 07:45 PM
Too simple for my tastes. I don't feel the need to dwell on the words.