Turkey Day: The Domino Effect

[Rok the Blade]

Rules Recap
->1 post max(except me), it can be any length. Don't put in a novel though...
->Have fun, be funny and creative
->Wait your turn (the list is in the recruit thread, in the RP Corner)
->My first post here won't be too long, but only because I get one more at the end cuz I'm special!
->Your post doesn't have to proceed directly after the person's before you, but don't make it like half the day later.

"And that, students, is how to fight a black dragon."

The crowd of young students clapped with joy, sitting on the square stone slabs that covered the front yard of the schoolhouse, their backs facing the school. The street they were on was bustling with activity but thankfully the schoolyard was vacant except for Rokusho and the students plus their teacher, who all sat near the front entrance and watched in awe as a shining knight with a giant sword on his back finished his speech.

The morning was beautiful in the middle of Radasanth, the winter months were coming soon so the air had a slight chill to it, but the bright sun rising from the east beaming through a cloudless sky warmed things up. A large oak tree in the middle of the yard reached high above the people, it's branches half-filled with leaves sending a frenzy of shadows dancing across the ground with the wind.

A little girl rose her hand from the middle of the bunch and said, "Mither, whaddya do again when the dagon killth the pwithoner?"

"I don't believe I said anything about a prisoner..." Rokusho responded with a chuckle. He heard the little girl mutter an "Oh" before she ducked into the back of the group. "Any other questions before I take off?"

A little boy in the front rose his hand.

"Yes?"

"Why is there a monster turkey behind you, sir...?" He said quietly, innocently.

"A... Monster turkey? What?" Rok responded, bewildered. Then he saw the rest of the kids faces weren't staring at him anymore but rather over his shoulder. He also heard the ruffling of fallen leaves and pitter-patter of little feet behind him. He looked back.

"Gobble."

Rokusho's eyes widened, "Whoa!" He took a step back, startled. It was indeed a turkey... A strangely large turkey. It was looking straight at him, they were at eye level. A monstrous turkey with a big, fat brown body and a slender red neck with long and colorful tail feathers. It could've been mistaken for a cockatrice due to it's size, but it's appearance was simply that of an enlarged turkey, with a somewhat cute and innocent look on it's face.

"What in the world?"

"I tink it likes you, mistha!" The group of kids laughed to Rok's surprise. They weren't in the least bit afraid of it, but were rather amused by it.

"... Right." Rokusho said quietly, looking at the strange turkey in front of him. He stepped to the side to walk around it and took a couple steps forward towards the street. "Well, uh, I'll have to come talk with you little ones tomorrow then!" He wondered what they'd do with the turkey, maybe keep it since they liked it so much. Rokusho didn't really care, as long as it was harmless. He smiled when he heard the children say things like "Awwww..." and "Mannnn..." behind him as he walked off. But after a couple of steps he heard the soft pitter-patter of steps behind him again. Right behind him. He looked back.

"Bwuk." The turkey looked at him with a vacant and innocent expression.

"... Strange. I hope you're not going to follow me..." He quietly whispered to himself. The kids chuckled, still watching the spectacle.

Rokusho took another step forward, "Please don't follow me, please don't follow me!" Then he stopped after a couple more steps and waited to hear the sound of the turkey following him again. To his surprise, he heard nothing. But he waited for a moment anyway. After a second he watched the turkey stroll past him, ignoring him, and towards the gate that separated the schoolyard from the street. "Thank goodness." He thought, but somehow he had the feeling that he would see that turkey again sometime...

[Call me J]

It wasn’t that late in the morning. A bit late to still be in bed, especially a bed in someone else’s house, but Jame didn’t care. He had spent the night drinking hard, as he had recently been wont to do. Recent events had been stressful, and drinking heavily was at times the only kind of respite that he could afford. When he was drunk, he always concentrated on petty problems that he could solve.

Now, when he woke up in the bed of a young woman whose name he couldn’t remember, the half dragon wished he’d drank a bit less. That way, at least he would have remembered what had happened last night. Given the fact that neither he or the blonde sleeping next to him had any clothes on, he had a good idea, but even so, that would have been something he’d have wanted to remember.

Jame wondered what name he’d given the girl. It didn’t matter that much. More than anything else, he needed to do something to stop his head from ringing. It felt heavy and his mouth reeked with the smell of day old alcohol. The half dragon stumbled into the kitchen area of the small one room flat and took cautious gulps from a brown clay pot in the corner. His stomach was too sensitive to handle big gulps.

That was when he saw a giant turkey. He didn’t know what the turkey was doing, why it was there, or even if giant turkeys were particularly common in this part of Radasanth. He had been spending his time in Corone because the alcohol and women had been cheap, not because he cared about the local wildlife.

Curious, Jame slipped some pants on and went out to investigate. He didn’t bother with his shirt or his weapons, he would be back in, and most likely to bed, in a few minutes. The sun was too bright and hurt his eyes. However, the half dragon really wanted to investigate the strange bird.

Once the turkey spotted him, Jame realized the folly of his actions. It gobbled excitedly and ran over towards him, and the half dragon only realized now that the large bird was far too big for him to fight. Despite his hangover and upset stomach, the half dragon began to run.

It was only after the first five minutes that Jame realized he would have been better served ducking back into the house, and only after the next five that he realized he should have worn his shoes. He ran in the direction of the city, not consciously, but just because that was the direction he was heading. The turkey seemed to be keeping exact pace with him the whole time he ran, and it gobbled excitedly along the way.

As he entered into the town, Jame began to scream for help. He began to look for open doors, something, anything that would give him a place of refuge from the giant bird. The turkey still followed behind him, gobbling excitedly.

The only thing open he could see was a church. It wasn’t exactly where Jame would have wanted to spend his morning, but with a turkey chasing after him, he didn’t have very many other choices.

“Please! Please!” he shouted, to little avail. “Go away, go away!”

The turkey didn’t listen.

“Please don’t follow me, please don’t follow me!” he begged. He doubted that would work either. A few seconds later, he had darted into the church and slammed the door behind him. It was a full congregation. Startled, Jame could no longer deal with his upset stomach. Right there, in the middle of a sermon about some issue Jame could have done well to regard, the half dragon vomited.

The entire congregation looked on aghast.

“There… there was a turkey… following me,” he said. But by now, the turkey had gone.

There was still a widespread look of disproval from the congregation. It was only now Jame realized that he hadn’t zipped up his pants.

Without waiting another minute, Jame ran out of the church and straight back to the girl’s house. He made plans to leave Radasanth later that evening.

The giant turkey had been a particularly harrowing twenty minutes for the half dragon, one that he would promptly forget ever happened when he fell back down to sleep in the bed of the blonde girl whose name he couldn’t remember.

[Caine Raienbark]

Strolling mildly down the path as he often liked to do on day-break, Caine had wrapped his cloak tightly around himself and was sipping at some hot liquid. The warmth of the Radasanthian beverage filled his insides and made him calm, almost causing him to walk along in a semi-trance. The cool air licked at what was revealed of his cheeks. Thanks to the drink, however, he stayed warm, and for that, he was thankful.

This time of the year always made Caine tired. He often wished he was a bear and could simply sleep for the winter season, not because he disliked it, but simply because he grew sleepy far too often. Giving a brief yawn and continuing to trot along, he was not at all perturbed by the sight of a giant avian strutting towards him. It was only when the turkey stood two feet in front of him did he take a moment to pause and look at it with confused eyes. One eyebrow quirked as he took a sip from his warm liquid and he allowed his jaw to drop slightly.

“I'm...I'm sorry, but what are you, exactly?” he questioned, not entirely expecting an answer from the giant bird. “Hm...you are a very curious creature,” he mused, leaning slightly to the side to examine the turkey's large frame. Amusingly, the turkey did the same. This brought a fleeting chuckle to Caine's lips as he was about to sip again at the liquid. The turkey watched him carefully every time he had gently tugged his scarf down to reveal his lips. It cocked it's head to one side and let out a chipper, “Globblegobbleglobblelobble.” Caine outright laughed at the beast and gave a short bow.

“Good day to you, giant turkey!” he said, his eyes slanting in the way one's does when they are smiling. Taking a large strafing step, he began to pace forward once more, continuing to think little of the giant bird who had stopped him. It was only when he had walked fifty paces did he stop to turn and confirm what had just happened, the absurdity of it all finally registering. However, the creature had gone, leaving nothing but the fleeting memory of something that Caine dearly hoped was the product of his warm liquor.

[Stuffed Fury]

"Ahhhh, fine day. Eh, Roderick?"

The bazaar merchant whispered out an absent-minded response, "Indeed." He was tinkering with some miniature materials for Sasorick in the back of the shop, at a small workbench right in the shade of the leather roof. The teddy bear chuckled, he was standing on the main counter, just watching the normal traffic of a day in the Radasanth Bazaar. People strolled by casually, checking out all sorts of wares, sometimes glancing at the weapons and armor strewn all around the stuffed bear.

The midday sun cast it's rays straight down onto the world, sending a warm breeze through the cold bazaar air. To Sasorick though, it was like any other sunny day. He didn't feel the cold breeze, but his forest green cloak wavered with the wind.

"Ick! Get away from me, creature!" A woman cried from the side of his view, loud enough to sail through the bustling noise of all the shopping. Sasorick turned his head to look at the disturbance.

An inquisitive look appeared on Sasorick's face, "Hmm?" He saw through the crowd a turkey head poking up out of the crowd. A woman was trying to power walk away from it but it pursued diligently.

"Awwwwesome!" The teddy bear exclaimed, hopping up and down as the duo came towards their wagon. The woman only glanced at Sasorick as she strolled by, but the giant turkey stopped immediately, pivoted and faced Sasorick, it's head still a few feet above the stuffed bear's even while on the counter. The two equally strange creatures stared at each other with bewildered expressions on their faces. But Sasorick's face quickly fent from confused to ecstatic. He spun over to look at Roderick, smiling.

"Rod, look! A GIANT TURKEY!"

"Gobble?" The turkey responded quietly, turning it's head over to the side like a dog.

"Yes, of course." Roderick replied. The old merchant was still hunched over his work bench tinkering! He just bullshitted Sasorick right then. But the teddy didn't care. He turned back to the turkey.

"I'll call you Turk. Wait, no... Turkleton! Nope... Turkey is good." He nodded to himself, silently acknowledging his name-making skills. Being the fearless soon-to-be famous Corone Ranger that he was, he couldn't help but do the first thing that popped into his little head.

He leaped from the counter and latched onto the turkey's main body, grabbing hold of some feathers. They were strong enough to support the three pounds that he weighed, and that made him all the more excited.

"BWUK!" The mutant turkey took a step back, startled. It craned it's neck to look at the stuffed bear that was then scaling up it's feathers and onto it's back.

"C'mon, Turkey! Take me for a spin!" Sasorick yelled happily, dropping straight down onto his butt. The surprised turkey turned and dashed down the bazaar street with it's ranger rider on it's back.

"Hell yes!" He exclaimed, riding down the street on his new turkey steed. It wasn't long though until the enlarged turkey leaped straight up, soaring over a little boy standing innocently by. The sudden change of pace knocked the teddy bear into the air and he fell to the hard-packed dirt ground with a thud. The turkey stopped.

"Agh! Dang..." He looked up, and the turkey was standing over him, looking down. "Ready for another ride?" Sasorick asked.

"Gobble!" The giant turkey bent it's neck down and snapped at him, startling the stuffed bear and putting a shocked look on his face.

"Ah hell no!" Sasorick jumped up to his feet. His smallish body began to glow a faint white as the turkey tried to turn and stroll away, but before it got out of reach Sasorick's magical dash propelled him forward fast enough to latch on to one of the turkey's legs. "You don't snap at your rider!" He yelled.

After a couple of steps the turkey lifted it's leg up and kicked outward, sending Sasorick flying into the wagon of another merchant, some clothing merchant or something. He landed on the counter, amongst some leather clothing.

"Bwuk!"

"No!" Teddy scrambled to his feet, his eyes darting from side to side, looking for his steed. To his surprise, it was gone...

"Aw, damnit!"

[The Archer]

Seth stretched out his lanky muscles and shook out his thick black ruff. It was more than refreshing to feel the cool air of the Coronian autumn on his fur after so much of the stifling Fallien sun. He'd gone to fight a war, only to be taken prisoner for the fact that he became dangerous when he transformed from a human into his fox form - the form he spent the most time as. Being human again was nice, but it only lasted for two days every month, and he was starting to get used to being covered with fur and have a range of motion with his ears.

The sounds of a familiar language flowing around him combined with the rush of welcome, familiar scents. He could smell meat pies, and late harvest fruits, along with fresh bread, roasting fowl and pig, and...ah yes, the acrid scent of human and animal waste. The gray stone buildings seemed to meld into the cobblestone streets, which were hard and craggy beneath his feet - better than the rough sands of the desert, but he'd have given almost anything to have some real grass underpaw.

Gotta love cities.

Seth stretched again, being more careful with his right arm this time. He'd had to fight for his freedom in the Prahna'dyuta, and had sustained an injury there while fighting its master, Idynstar. While the battle may have been brutal, it had achieved his freedom, and now he was back in Corone...with nowhere to go. He still felt like he was too much of a danger to his lover's children to go back to her now, and as such, he was in between adventures.

Lying down on a big stone bench, Seth started contemplating his next move, barely twitching an ear when the clock struck eleven fifteen. Just about then, something hard and slightly sharp pecked at him once, then twice, before pulling at a chunk of his fur, causing the were-fox to yelp sharply and whirl around to see just what it was that wanted his attention.

By the Thayne... Seth had hunted down some big turkeys in his time, but this was ridiculous. The thing had a couple of inches on him, and he was pretty tall for a human...however human he still was.

"Listen, turkey, I'm pretty sure I'd remember hunting down something your size, so there's no vengeance to take. Buzz off."

It didn't. It continued staring at him with its piercing, unblinking gaze, as though it were either dumb or trying to coax a confession out of him. Seth felt the fur on his back raise and his tail go bottle-brushy as it continued to glare at him, and he waved his hand in front of its face, trying to make its line of sight go somewhere else.

"This is not the hunter you're looking for, move along."

Instead, it took a step forward, forcing Seth to retreat.

"Oh, come on, this is stupid. Go away, you're not real. You're a hallucination, and I'm not hungry."

The slow chase continued, Seth backing away one step for every pace it took forward, his tail swishing nervously.

"Don't make me bite you. I'll do it...and then you'll turn into a hairy freak like me. Not that you aren't a freak already...but I'll do it!"

The thing just fluffed up its feathers and charged him, leaving the poor lycanthrope with no choice but to turn tail and run away.

This is stupid. I have a quiver full of arrows, including a couple against monsters, so why am I running?

Stupid as it may have been, he didn't stop. After five minutes, he dodged around a corner and then ducked down a side road for good measure, only to see the creature pop up not ten feet away from him, eliciting a frustrated snarl from the fox.

Another fifteen minutes of trying hard to evade the thing without any sort of success, Seth bolted up a tree, and snarled down at the bird as it clucked up at him, tilting its head as though its glare could make him come down. It couldn't, and Seth drew an arrow from his quiver and nocked it to his bow.

"Scram, bird, or I will shoot you down and devour you right here, in front of everyone."

Apparently, turkeys are as intelligent as they are reported to be, for when faced with this threat, the anomalously large bird turned around and strutted down the road, away from him, leaving Seth free to drop back to the ground.

Damn, those things are ugly...

He sighed, rubbing a hand-paw over his green eye, then shaking out his ruff.

"I need a stiff drink."

[Slayer of the Rot]

"Well, we have some wondrous roast beef, and some slow cooked chicken, and imported dur-taigen, s-sir. Oh it....it's wonderful. T-the taste is like-" The merchant's breath froze in his throat as though a hand had squeezed it shut. The man before him let out a slow hissing noise from his clenched teeth, his grey eyes narrowed to small slits. The air was electric with the auburn haired man's dangerous frustration, humming with impending violence.

"I do not want wolf meat, you worm. This is tradition. I want a turkey." Dan Lagh'ratham's hands curled into thick, trembling fists. The calendar that he had kept on and off since arriving in this world had told him today was or was at least close to Thanksgiving, and no matter the monster he had metamorphosed into, this tradition at least tied him to Meredith, to Claire. Now, the cobblestones at his feet had begun to lightly tremble with his anger, and anyone who had remained around the cart in the marketplace scurried off. Dust that had settled between the cracks in the stones rose up to the Saraelian's ankles in a dirty fog, spreading slowly across the street.

"The rush was too great, sir! Please! I have no turkey for you this day!" The rumbling intensified with each word, and by the time he had finished the wares in every stand within twenty feet of the area was rattling violently. Small glass trinkets tipped over and shattered upon the street.

"Then if there is no turkey..." A long bladed knife appeared in his left fist, and the Saraelian stepped forward, jaws parting, "Then perhaps I'll just eat YOU!"

A loud, piercing wail erupted from the merchant's lips, and he slapped his hands over his eyes. Legs tangling as he sought the man fell hard to the the street, and flailed his arms. "No! Please! Eat him!"

"Gobble."

'That sound...' Spinning to face where the panicked merchant had pointed, Dan found himself staring at an enormous turkey. The titanic foul cocked it's head in one sharp motion at the tall, knife wielding man, and let loose another of it's ridiculous calls. Snatching up a nearby pitchfork, he summoned Bhidyate, holding either weapon at his side in brutal pantomime of the classic impatient diner. The giant bird ruffled it's plumage and craned it's long neck to the left, looking away. "[B]JACKPOT[/I]!" The Saraelian roared, rushing down the street, swinging the buster sword at it's vulnerable rubber neck - only to have the blade cut through nothing but air as the foul leaned down to peck something off the road. Growling, Dan spun the pitchfork in his other hand about, tines pointing to the ground, and brough it down towards the turkey's back. But the blow halted inches from the foul's feathered back as it's head shot up, slamming into the Saraelian's groin.

"S....son of a bitch...." Wheezing, he stumbled back, driving Bhidyate into the ground to lean against it for a moment.

'This thing's strength is ridiculous. It's close to matching mine, if it hurt me that bad...' Clenching his teeth, he tore his blade out of the ground and advanced again, thrusting the pitchfork at the turkey's enormous, plump body. It strutted away from every blow, cutting one step short as the sword came crashing down in front of it, shattering cobblestones.

"Ludicrous! You're a fucking bi-" The foul's head darted forward, it's beak slamming the Saraelian right between the eyes. Dazed and furious, he again brought the pitchform down in a direct arc, but it's blades bent when it struck the street, it's handle splintering apart. Dan rapped his knuckles against his head and with a blink, the world began to become clear - clear enough to see the monstrous bird's ass in retreat.

"Get back here! I'm not eating a god damn wolf!" The buster sword vanished from his hand, only to be replaced a second later by a large black bladed gunblade. Still woozy, the two shots that rang out from the weapon splintered the post of a merchant's stand twenty feet away, and the other went spiralling off into the sunrise. His enormous traditional dinner had vanished down another street.

Fishing through his pockets, Dan slammed down a handful of coins on the terrified merchant's stand and pressed the heel of his hand against his forehead, gunblade hanging forgotten at the side.

"Where's the beef?"

[Nymph and Dragon]

Is anyone coming? Twyla’s hands were shaking as she crept down the carpet-lined hall, staying as near to the wall as possible and trying her best not to breathe. Her sandals whispered across the floor, but even though she was only person in the passageway, her heart was beating a frantic pace inside her chest. Even telepathic her voice was hushed, quieter than the usual mental shouting that she used when speaking to the Elemental. He snaked across the ground behind her in his two-foot long aqueous form, nearly invisible in the dim light that fell from the candles hanging from the walls at regular intervals. He heard her question, but the only response he sent across their bond was a wave of disapproval identical to the ones he’d been sending since the stupid idea to break into a manor had occurred to her that morning.

Twyla stopped skulking and turned to give him an icy-eyed glare, her blue eyes sharp above the sheer scarf that covered the lower half of her face.

“You know, if I get caught, you’ll be stuck in prison too,” she warned aloud. The Elemental would have rolled his eyes if he could have. She thought she could scare him into helping her by threatening self-injury? Let them imprison her! He had innumerable years of life ahead of him. At least if the nymph was in jail he wouldn’t have to worry about getting her out of the ridiculous situations she put herself in. Like this one, for instance . . .

Look, I’m not going to steal anything. She’d tried arguing before and didn’t seem to realize that his lack of response was a sign of refusal to engage in her petty reasoning. It’s not even strictly illegal. I’m just here to investigate a rumor because YOU won’t tell me whether the baron’s having an affair.

The dragon silently scoffed. She always blamed him when she got into trouble trying to illegally satisfy her unseemly curiosity. Why did she want to know about the baron? It certainly wasn’t relevant to her research. She just liked hearing gossip, and if she thought he was going to help satiate her sweet-tooth for scandal, she was in for quite the disappointment.

He sensed a mind suddenly approaching rapidly, and he stopped moving and lifted his head to look around, his ears perking up even though he didn’t need them to sense it. He was about to break his vow of silence by offering the nymph a word of caution, but at that moment a soft gurgling noise brought their attention to the landing at the end of the hall, where standing at the top of the staircase was the most hideous beast that Twyla had ever seen in her life. It was covered in thick brown feathers that puffed away from its rotund body like spikes on a blowfish. A fan-like tail shot up from its rear end like a headdress behind a head that desperately needed embellishment. It had a blue face spotted with beady black eyes, and hanging from its wicked-looking beak was a long red beard of quivering fat. It stood before them with an air of lofty indifference, but its eyes glinted with mindless malevolence.

“What the hell is that?” The nymph’s voice was faint with horror.

The Elemental didn’t know, so he didn’t bother answering. What he did know was that the giant bird-looking monstrosity was, despite its frightful appearance, completely harmless. But in a spitefully vindictive move that would have made Twyla proud if she hadn’t been on the reciprocating end, he decided to keep that information to himself.

The nymph put a hand out behind her to feel the wall and took a step backwards, moving slowly as if hoping to escape without notice. As soon as she moved, however, the strange-looking beast’s head twitched, and with a noise that sounded like the last words of a drowning old man, it took several spindly-legged steps towards her.

Twyla gasped and froze. Every fiber of her being was screaming for her to run, but at the other end of the hall was a closed door that might have been locked, and even though she was closer to the staircase that led to the ground floor, that . . . thing was standing between her and any hope of escape.

Snake, the nymph barked, make yourself useful and kill it!

It’s not hurting you, he replied nonchalantly.

It’s ugliness is making my soul bleed, she retorted, taking another slow step back and stopping with a squeak when the thing followed.

Now I know you’re lying, Twyla, because if your soul was bleeding, mine would be too. I’m not going to defend you from something that just wants to be friends.

It was only ten feet away from her, and Twyla was already trying to decide on how it would kill her. Friends? Are you kidding? Use your dragon mojo on him and make him leave!

How did you know that it was a boy? The Elemental solidified into his green-scaled dragon form and tilted his head as if listening to something. You know, I think you’re right, it is male. And, strangely enough, it seems to have magical vision that lets it see through thin cloth.

So? Another step backwards made the obscene creature waddle even closer, taking far more steps than she had and getting close enough for Twyla to see that it was nearly as tall as a man and just about as repulsive.

So I think he’s fallen for your Allure, the dragon said with a mental smirk.

Twyla shot him a glare, but as soon as her eyes left the bird, it spread its wings so that the tips brushed the walls on either side of the hallway and lurched forward, letting out an excited bellow that sounded like an orc chewing on rocks or a constipated whale’s mating call, a noise that could only truly be described as

“GOBBLE GOBBLE GOBBLE!”

With a shriek of pure unadulterated terror, Twyla turned and fled, nearly tripping on the hem of her dress as she ran down the hallway faster than she’d ever moved on land before in her life. She could hear the rustle of feathers as the turkey rushed after her, could almost feel its wicked beak stabbing into her back, that nasty fifth appendage that hung off its chin slapping against her ankles . . .

The door at the end of the hall was mercifully unlocked, and she threw herself into it, barely managing to twist the handle before she tumbled in, scrambling on hands and knees to slam the door shut, throwing her back against it once it was closed in what felt like a futile effort to keep the monster away from her.

After a few seconds of sitting tensely against the door with her eyes shut, dedicating every ounce of her body to bracing the door against the expected opposition, Twyla opened her eyes, and the sight that met them made her wish that she’d kept them closed. The floor of the chamber was littered with discarded garments, and the large bed in the middle of the room was occupied by the entwined figures of a stately old gentleman and a generously-proportioned young woman, both of whom were staring at her with guilty surprise.

How odd. He just . . . jumped out the window. A trickle of smug amusement filtered across her bond with the Elemental. Oh, and, Twyla? I might have been lying about the magical vision.

“Morning, Baron,” Twyla said by way of greeting with a cordial nod of the head. She slowly stood up, lifting one hand in a small wave while the other reached behind her for the doorknob. She had a far less friendly message for the Elemental. You better start running now.

[Cuddles!]

"Yippey yai yay, yippey yai yay... yiippppppeeyyy, yaiiiii yaaaaayy, mother***** "

The insanity that was the bubbly and chainsaw toting minature anthro kitten was not only evidenced in the fact he happily sang a song whose lyrics were a violent catch-phrase to an action movie in a world where he was merely ink, but when he unleashed the word motherfucker his vocal chords immediately went into the bleeped out sound that was often made upon the TV channels showing the movie a touch early. Slung on his back in its make-shift sheath was Snicker-Snack and carted on his shoulder was Mish-Mash, the large mallet he had used to crush the skull of many other creatures like himself he somehow had a memory of... sadly he'd not found any of his fellow inkians and certainly not been looking for them, far too much around here that was shiny and pretty and ooooh...aww... its pricy. With his happy tune gone and bleeping itself into non-existence the Kitten was satiating his curiousity

" 'ere you 'orrible little blighter, gerroff my stand"

"But it shiny!"

Do it, do it, do it

At that very specific moment, when Cuddles was being held aloft by the nape of his neck and feeling very slashy indeed because this man didn't want him stealing that big lovely watermelon there poofed upon his shoulder a mini-Cuddles, a figment of his fictious imagination that wanted so much to perform Cuddles party peice.

Slashy sla.... oh ****!

Yes, even that part of his mind was bleeped out despite having no concept of the water-shed and a very good reason for it. There was a massive shape flailing through the air trying to gain a few more inches height from its vastly fast plummeting. The trader had ditched the feline and was running off, leaving his wares unprotected.

"Gooodie!"

Cuddles had his paws on the big shiny watermelon before his feet even hit the floor, all the time his evil...er, side tugging on his ear to alert his creator to this most fowl of fates. The turkeys shadow blotted out the light upon the watermelon and the cartoon kitties interest lasped.

"Aww, no fun no....wow, big feather bu-mph!"

What happened could be described in detail but its much more interesting to skip five minutes ahead, in that time-frame there is a very large and friendly Turkey Gobbling at the top of its capacious lungs because there was a rather large pain in its posterior, a pain being increased as Cuddles flailed and struggled, sucked into the anal orifice to his elbows. Might suprise some to think he wasn't screaming like the Turkey but really, would you want to open your mouth?...

His tail swung wildly trying to find some form of support, its form shifting until the tip was hooked and finally caught himself on the cod-peice of a curious noble, with a yelp from the turkey and a very audible pop Cuddles found daylight once more. He savoured the daylight as he hung there, dangling off the blanched nobles cod-peice.

".....YEEEEEEEEEEEUUUUUUUUUUUUCH!"

[Bloodrose]

A little early for lunch... Teric was thinking, wandering amongst the various street vendors who plied their wares up and down the streets of Radasanth at all hours of the days. The pleasant aroma of cooking sausages, fried onions, fried batter, and a delectable little treat that could best be described as "rat-on-a-stick", wafted through the streets, tempting the old warrior's empty belly. Last night had been another night spent drinking and sharing tales of his past conquests at one of the many local taverns, and he hadn't quite be up to eating upon waking earlier...

"Suppose I'll try one of those." The veteran stopped alongside the "rat-on-a-stick" stall and pointed to one of the less grotesque specimens rotating on a spit. The majority of passerby gave the stall and its vendor a wide berth, but when you've eaten some of the things Teric had eaten to survive while campaigning, you were certainly less picky about your food.

Besides, they were dirt cheap...

"Tastes kind of like Akashima-style beef." Teric muttered to himself as he nibbled at the hunk of meat skewered unforgivably on a wooden stick. "Kind of tangy, kind of tough..." As he rounded a corner, Teric stopped suddenly in his tracks, a string of meat half-gnawed between his teeth. Standing in the center of the street was the largest turkey the mercenary had seen in his entire life. In fact, forget that it was a turkey at all; it was the largest bird the mercenary had ever seen in his entire life...

"Too much." Teric said out loud, to no one in particular as he turned and began walking briskly down a different side street. "Far too much liquor last night. Never again. I'm getting to old to be doing this every night..." Safely away, the old warrior turned and looked over his should...

...only to be confronted by a giant turkey head with a bright red wattle of flesh under its chin. Two beady little eyes stared at him inquisitively.

"By the Goddess." His lunch thoroughly forgotten, Teric turned back and stared straight ahead, willing the visage of the giant bird to vanish back into whatever ridiculous void it had emerged from. One, two, three, four... Teric counted to ten in his head, and then peered slowly back over his shoulder.

Gobble!

Startled, and questioning his mental capacities, the old warrior cut loose and set off at a run down the street, leaving one giant turkey pecking interestedly at the "rat-on-a-stick" left laying in the street...

[Karuka]

Coming back to Radasanth after a major trial of faith felt almost like coming full circle to Karuka. The last time she'd been to the city, she'd just come off a boat after killing a person for the first time. Her faith had been shaken, but not broken.

Not this time. On her travels this time, she had been yanked to a time of absolute godlessness, where the gods of her childhood had faded into mere myth and the gods of the day were nothing but vice. On her subsequent search to reaffirm her faith, she'd found none, merely conflict, and finally had seen Ragnarok in Raiaera.

The gods were dead, and she was going to have to learn how to live with that. The power she'd gotten and expected from them would no longer be forth-coming. Even her pendulum, the one tool that didn't depend on her faith to lead her on, had fallen silent. She still wore it around her neck, under her vlince shirt. It was, however useless, the only thing she had left of her mother, and her mother's mother, and the mother of that matriarch. She was the fifth generation of eldest daughter to have it... and she couldn't throw away her entire heritage.

Even her father's sword, good for absolutely nothing save maybe cutting rope on occasion, still hung at her waist, although it hindered her new weapons. On her waist, she carried a pair of unembellished mythril daggers and a set of six steel throwing knives - tools she wasn't familiar with - tools she'd need for survival. In her left hand, she carried her Nihon staff, which had been with her for so long that she'd almost forgotten it was there.

The red-head was headed to the Citadel to learn how to use her knives. It was only the sensible thing to do, and perhaps the first sensible thing she'd done since she'd first been dragged to Althanas, almost two years before.

Without faith, one needs sense.

Radasanth was the same as it had been the last time she'd walked it. The cobblestone streets still spread under her feet and the feet of thousands of other people. The same colorful banners still displayed goods and services. There was still the same noise as people discussed and argued, bargained and scolded; it was the sound of any big city. It still smelled of fresh bread, cooking meat, and hundreds upon hundreds of people. She wasn't really paying attention to it.

Not until something plucked at one of her new knives.

Her hand went to her belt and she whirled around to see...a giant bird the likes of which she'd never seen.

What the Hel?

It stared at her, and she stared at it. The sun seemed to stare oppressively at both of them, and the bird ruffled its red and brown feathers as Karuka ran a brown hand through her red hair.

"Gub?"

"You're an odd fellow," Karuka said, a mere hint of her once thick accent lilting an otherwise somber voice. The bird didn't seem to want to move, either to attack her or to look her over, so the Irish girl turned to walk on her way.

Murmurs from the crowd told her she was being followed, but all she could hear were occasional sounds from the bird. If it wanted to follow her, she didn't really care. A pet would be welcome, she supposed, and one that big might be good to ride on.

She came to the foot of the ziggurat-shaped Citadel, and turned to check on her new companion, but all she could see were tail feathers as it went away, bored with her.

Oh well. Nothing and no one ever sticks for long.

That was the one capital T Truth that the girl had learned during her lifetime. Nothing sticks.

[Herald]

Wispy clouds crowned the lazy evening sun, forced to comply with it's desire to paint the heavens bright shades of red, orange, yellow and purple. Someone else might have been awed by such celestial beauty, and Gabriel was appreciative, in his own way...mainly it just reminded him of smoke, and how long it's been since he was able to smoke Magnificence. He had been awake for hours, and sadly sober the entire time.

But he was fixing that. Comfortably laying beneath a tree on the outskirts of Radasanth, Gabriel admired the fine job he had done in rolling a sizeable amount of dried Magol's plant into a suitable dry leaf. The embers on the end of his makeshift cigarrette glowed as brightly as the sun, and he carelssly admired the way the smoke curled up into the sky, as though aspiring to join the clouds so far above.

After a particularly long drag that nearly set him coughing, he leaned over to his left to tap the ashes off the end...But where they should have fallen on the grass, they feel instead onto some sort of orange root. Strange, Gabe's mind, already feeling the effects of his potent herb, began to think these thoughts unbidden. I don't remember that funny root being there when I sat down.

He slowly began to realize that the root resembled a claw, and as he lifted his gaze towards where the root grew, he eventually discovered it was attached to a significant amount of feathers.

What kind of bush grows feathers? I've never heard of such a thing! He raised his eyebrows to comic heights while he inhaled another sizeable drag...purely to help him think, of course. As he continued to raise his gaze, he noticed that the feathery bush began to resemble a bird of immense proportions, complete with wings, beak, and a strange red growth on it's chin.

Gabriel was still trying to reason his way through what kind of bush grew birds when the beady little eyes began to blink rapidly. Swiftly leaning in, the bird's hideous face looked demonic wreathed in the aromatic smoke. It opened it's beak while Gabriel watched in fascination, idly wondering if he was about to be devoured by a devilish-bird-bush.

"Gobblegobblegobblegobble!"

Gabe's jaw fell slack as he tried to comprehend what he was just told. It didn't sound exactly like the threat of a painful, imminent death. It actually sounded pretty funny. Was it supposed to be a joke?

Laughing uncertainly, Gabriel gestured at his slowly-burning cigarrette and offered it up to the monstrous bird-bush. Snatching it up with it's beak, it inhaled sharply, let out something like a "Gobblebwuk," and dropped it square into Gabe's lap. Jumping up so as to avoid catching on fire, Gabriel started to think his new friend wasn't the best company. Randomly picking a direction that seemed vaguely familiar, Gabe started smoking and walking, not sure of his destination, but positive it would be a more agreeable place.

To his surprise, the bird-bush uprooted itself and waddled along behind him. Thoroughly high off his herb, Gabriel's only reaction was to quicken his step. The bird-bush followed suit, following along closely behind him. Glancing behind him, Gabriel broke into a slow jog, taking one last, long puff of his rapidly dwindling cigarrette and tossing the butt-end to the side, hoping the bird-bush would be distracted by his burnt offering. It wasn't.

Paranoia was starting to sink in. Did I offend this bush with the smoke? Why is it still chasing me?! Oh man oh man oh man oh man... Gabe turned to check on his pursuer. It was still behind him, and maybe it was only in Gabe's imagination, but it's eyes seemed to scream bloody murder.

"Ah! Get away from me!"

"Gobblegobblegobble!" The demonic battlecry answered him back mockingly. Gabe started to sweat. He could expect no mercy from such a foe. He would eventually have to stand and fight...unless he could make it to a crowded area first. Maybe the bird-bush would be distracted by the prescence of other people and find weaker prey, someone more suitable to be fertilizer at it's orange root-claws.

Gabriel was sprinting full speed ahead, dodging old women and apple-carts in his rush to find a populated area. Was that laughter he heard from the bystanders? He was being hunted like an animal through the streets, and these sick people found it amusing?! He would have revenge someday...if he could escape today, that is.

His legs started to grow heavy and his lungs started to burn, but he wouldn't, no, he couldn't stop. It seemed like an eternity before he reached the Bazaar, but there it was, unmistakably before him. Full of people he could use to distract this, this thing behind him.

Pulling up to a stop, he whirled like a tornado and drew his sword. Or rather, tried to, but ended up dropping it. Scrambling to pick it up, he started desperately shouting, "You evil bird-bush! Fight me now! Right here! These people won't let you kill me!"

He was panting heavily when he finally drew himself up into a proper fighting stance and resolutely turned to face his doom. Nothing. There was no bird-bush behind him, no demonic pursuer ready to tear him limb-from-limb. Only a crowd of curious onlookers, wearing confused and amused expressions. He looked quickly from side to side, suddenly self-conscious. Hoping no one noticed his outburst, he casually sheathed his sword and ran a hand through his hair. Brushing leaves and dirt off his clothes, he did his best to stroll nonchalantly to the other end of the Bazaar, valiantly ignoring the raucous laughter of the crowd.

"Freaking bush."

[Melancor]

The blanket of night had already covered the heavens and the moon had just begun to rise in the horizon as the last ochre reminding of the sun faded away. It had been a long day, Melancor hadn’t had a drink of water yet and he grew impatient, looking for a good place to spend the night.

"Damn, this city is truly worthless…." He walked through the streets with an indifferent look in his face, his body curved and his arms slack. The children had long retrieved to their homes and only a few old figures walked through the dark street.

“funny….It smells like chicken….” He whispered to himself as the modest dry smell of dirt was revoked by the strong odor. But he wasn’t in his best senses so he went on, wobblingly walking toward the far away light illuminating a pleasant sign reading “Inn”.

He knocked, once, twice, three times until a woman of older age answered. She covered her head with a brown scarf as a cold breeze inundated her lobby. She looked at Melancor, and then above his head then back at him.

“…Yes?” Her voice was tiered with the burden of age.

“Good evening…. Do you have any rooms left?”

“I sure do….” Again she looked above Melancor’s head, puzzled by such spectacle.

“Great” he paused for a second waiting for the woman to move so he could finally get some rest after exploring this city of Radasanth

“I am affraid there is no room for no pet. specially not such a large one…”

“What are you talking about old woman?” Melancor snapped at her, he was not up to jokes, all he wanted was to rest. She pointed at Melancor with a shaky finger.

“...what?” he asked hesitantly.

“Behind you…”

Melancor turned back to face a wall of feathers “...the heck” he exclaimed, as he tried to shove the giant being to keep his feathers off his face. He walked around the strange creature, trying to recognize what it was. His big dark eyes followed Melancor as he moved parallel to the street.

“…Is that…. A turkey?” He spoke with his eyes wide open, he had never seen such a thing, not in his 14,000 years. He had seen Rock birds soaring over the Salverian mountains, and strange-colored chickens in Corone… but not a giant turkey.

“Well there is no space in here for that chicken!” The woman slammed the door shut before Melancor had a chance to explain that such freakish creature was not his.

“Damn it, Stupid turkey!” Melancor roared at the object of his demise while this simply stared at him with those huge black eyes that somewhat intimidated him. After staring for a few seconds at the curious bird, Melancor turned around and began to walk the opposite way, setting course for another Inn who’s position he was yet to discover.

He sighed I just want some rest. then, out of the shadows… there was a horrible sound, one so terrifying and so vile, that it still hawnts his dreams to this day….

“GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE”

“What the…” he turned around to face the same feathered wall he had found before. “Stupid turkey what do you want!”

“GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE”

“I am a what?”

“GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE”

More by sleep depravation than pure madness, he spoke to the turnkey and engaged in a rather unorthodox conversation.

“Listen you, big chicken, I am not up to your annoying insults so back off…your pissing me off!”

“GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE”

“Oh no you didn’t!”

“GOBBLEGOBBLEGOBBLE”

Melancor reached for his back and grabbed an arrow and he unfastened his bow. “now you’ve made it you abhorred demon!”

And out of the blue, the so far pacific turkey frowned in indisposition and threw a hard peck in Melancor’s face.

“AH!” he yelled, “how dare you!” the big bird reached down for his leg and violently grasped him from the grown, flipping him over. He fell to the floor, and afterwards the great bird lifted him in the air. Melancor’s senses had been impaired by the lack of sleep, in different conditions he would have never allowed such silly looking beat to hold him on his beak like if he was some sort of pray he was used to toy with.

“You put me down, you foul beast! I order you damn it!” But the giant bird did not oblige, Melancor took his arrow on hand and began to jab the beast in the chest.

“ha ha! How do you like me now!” Melancor exclaimed, but the bird didn’t budge with pain, instead it frowned a second time and released Melancor. He fell into the ground head first, and before he could stand up, the great Turkey pinned him down to the ground, smashing him with the sheer force of this body. The turkey was sitting on Melancor.

“GET OFF ME!” he was enraged with such bold daring, in his life he had never been so humiliated. But he has to tiered to but up a big struggle, it didn’t went far off to ordering the turkey to remove his butt off his back, otherwise that he would make him the center dish in a human dinner. But again the turkey did not care. The only thing Melancor could do now was to wait… wait indignantly under the turkey’s heavy and immense body, then again…. it’s plumage was warm… and soft… it was not that comfortable, he could hardly breathe, but like a heavy blanket it offered a great shelter from the cold winds.

‘Damn you bird!.... I hate…. I hate your guts…. And…… how d-…dare you….. you f- oul.... b...east...................”
Melancor was in no disposition to argue, fatigued he closed his eyes… for how long? he was not aware, some seconds, maybe some minutes at the most. Until he felt a chill breeze sneak under his shirt, and he woke up. He could breathe now, he sat up in the street, rubbing his hair and fixing his chest plate. Another chilly breeze struck.

“Stupif Bird!” he yelled, but while he realized that the creature had banished into the night, with a sad voice he could only reply “…Turkey…. Where’d you go…?” He fell back to the floor and fell fast asleep. The next morning he would regard the enounter as a terrible nightmare.