Opening lines devoted to engage the reader in the setting, but mechanistically flawed. A choice of stronger subject-verb combinations ("thunder shook" -> "storm thundered") would help, as would articulating the violence through shorter, snappier sentences and, once the cadence is established, fragments? Multiple repetitive elements within descriptions (i.e. "storm" and "stormy", "waves" and "waves" within first two sentences).
"The mighty stone sea wall took the brunt of the offensive, protecting the inner harbour from its perilous wrath." -> the sea wall's perilous wrath? Ambiguity like this is unfortunately detracting from the scene that you want to set.
Introducing the first named character five paragraphs in can be a bit of a gamble. May be worth considering weaving her into the setting beforehand? For your chosen technique to work, the previous paragraphs really need to be tautly written, so as to trick the reader into not remembering that you haven't actually introduced a character yet.
The "drowned rat" simile was great, complementing the setting well.
Sentence fragments - unlike many I approve of their use, but only under certain conditions. "Persistent in her search for anyone who could shed some light on the mystery that was Ietus." <- the lack of rhythm to the previous sentences means that there's no reason why you should employ a fragment here when a full sentence would have sufficed.
"Still, Ayithe had not given up all hope and had the desire and determination to ask throughout Tirel for its location." <- no need to tell us this. Show it (which you are already doing)!
Becoming a feature of the thread - long sentences with no commas to break up the flow. "She held her black cloak close, desperately shielding her long blonde and brown hair and determined face, the supposed water proof had done the bare minimum to keep her dry from the blustering wind and rain." <- given that the sentence changes subject from Ayithe to the cloak halfway through, it would work best split in two. Also, "It was thin and poorly made, the basic material for such a task, the result of buying cheap and Ayithe regretted it with a shiver." <- Ayithe regretted the cloak, or the buying cheap (ambiguous "it")?
"Can you tell me who I could speak to at least?" <- No need to capitalise after a question mark or an exclamation mark ending dialogue (these count as commas). Capitalising here renders the sentence ("She begged as they both held onto their coats against the sudden blast of wind.") incomplete in its context.
Numerous jarring word choices ("military style operation", "less active part of the jetty", "she was a fighter for sure"), interspersed with mechanical errors (e.g. "caste" <- should be "cast", "pervious" <- should be "previous"). This continues throughout the thread, in some posts more noticeable than others. I would definitely advise careful proofreading and a second set of eyes to identify and solve these problem spots.
"With the pressure of her pursuer," <- nearly at the end of the first post, and this is the first that I've heard of this pursuer... is there really any pressure on her? Shouldn't this have been made clear (and shown, not told) earlier?
"I hate this... I hate this...I don't deserve it!" <- kudos for writing a main character who can say this, even if it's just in her mind! On the flip side, you are really going to have to convince me now that this is a protagonist worth following!