Happy Hour Challenge 3: Showbiz is Srs Biz

RIGHT!

It's now time for my third side event!

For this one, we're going down to Hollywood!

Here are the rules: Some suits on the West Coast want to make a summer blockbuster, and they're gonna' base it off your character.

Who's playing your character? (EDIT: Feel free to cast any other major characters involved with the storyline as well)
Who's directing the movie?
What's the movie's genre?
What's the plot going to entail?

We're gonna' assume here that you're writing the script, so we'll skip that part.

For bonus brownie points, who's gonna' score it/who will be on the OST?

Follow that outline, and pitch me that movie! Don't worry about the budget, they made enough off of The Dark Knight to not care about how much you spend making this.

You all have until February 1st to do this event. The winner will probably receive two (2) fate points for their troubles, while everyone else gets put back on the streets to begrudgingly write their television pilots and commercial rap songs.

Question: Are we limited to people that are currently living? As an extension, can we place actors in the magical time reversal machine to make them younger?

Absolutely. Same goes with directors and musicians, if you'd like.

Film Name:
Honuse Relaiyent

Directors:
Quentin Tarantino
Stanley Kubrick

Cast:
Honuse Relaiyent: Keith David
Eldar Njörðr: Jeremy Irons
Thor: Matt Barlow
Tyr: David Bowie
Odin: James Earl Jones
Narrator: Ronnie James Dio

Genre: Action

Original Score (Used in film) by Nobuo Uematsu

Commercial Soundtrack (Original Songs):
The Lawmaker – Iced Earth
Betrayed – Opeth
Abomination – Lamb of God
The Anger of Thor – Blind Guardian
Hunted by the Black – Iron Maiden
Fight Like A Dragon – Dragonforce
A Test of Honor – Judas Priest
The Pit of Hel – Cradle of Filth
Alsvid – Korpiklaani
Thunder of the Gods – Dio

Plot:

Honuse Relaiyent, a simple farmer in Norse times, is abducted by a local warlord, genetically modified and forced to lead his armies in battle. After spending several years in training, he finally murders his lord and escapes into the wilderness, where he is hunted by a demon known as the Lawmaker, a servant of the Aesir. Honuse Relaiyent defeats the demon, claiming its sword, Alsvid, as his own, whereupon he is confronted by Thor and Tyr, who are angered at the death of their servant.

He survives the encounter, gaining Thor’s lordship over lightning in the process, and is invited to regain his honor by replacing the slain Lawmaker. He spends the next year in training, traveling with the gods and doing their bidding, until his final test: the singlehanded defeat of ten thousand men. His reward is the reclamation of his lost honor, and is given the title of Lawmaker, as he assumes the duties of hunting the enemies of the gods.

Side Details:

Due to the grandeur of the locations, characters, and actions, the movie will be done entirely in CGI, utilizing motion-capture technology for realism. The cast will be the voice actors, while stuntmen will handle the physical duties of the motion capture sequences; this will be done by Industrial Light & Magic. It is narrated as if a retelling of an ancient story, such as the Edda Prose, though done sparsely in-between scenes.

Who's playing your character? (EDIT: Feel free to cast any other major characters involved with the storyline as well)

The Hero, Portalhopper, will be played by Ben Browder. You may know him from such series as Farscape, and the final season of Stargate SG-1, as the main character. His acting style is so gloriously over the top that he could actually read 'Hoppers dialogue without missing a beat.

Who's directing the movie?

Peter Jackson, famous for the Lord of the Rings movie. AKA The only person who's ever done a live-action Fantasy Movie RIGHT.

What's the movie's genre?

High Fantasy action-adventure, there will be swordfights, explosions, danger, and romance!

"is this going to be a kissing story, Grandpa?"

Just trust me on this.

What's the plot going to entail?

Evil volcano cultists abducted 'Hopper as a baby. He was saved from mass baby sacrifice by two paladins, one a wise-cracking rookie representing St. Cuthbert and the other a by-the-book veteran spreading the word of Pelor. In an explosion-filled magic carpet chase through the underground geyser system, the head cultist managed to possess him just before biting it. He was taken to an orphanage where eventually a master of kung-fu adopted him. Recognizing his potential even at such an early age. He spent his childhood learning how to punch and kick, but mostly to seek inner peace. At night, he warred with the spirit of the cultist in his dreams, besting him in his weakened form, but slowly coming to realize that one day, he will overpower 'Hopper. At the age of nine, he fled the monastery and fell into the hands of some gnomish sailors, who tried to sell him into slavery to an Orcish cabal of alchemists. The sale was interrupted by a raiding party of gnolls, though. In the ensuing battle, he crippled an arm stealing a worg and riding to safety. He trudged on through the deserts and plains and foothills, subsisting off of the (un)mercy of nature and fleeing the daily hordes of monsters and unnamable entities. After weeks of travel, he made it to a trading hub and apprenticed himself to the mad cleric of Olidamarra who healed his arm....several times after repeatedly crippling it for laughs. For years, he was used as guinea pig for the cleric's wizard friends, gaining all manner of maladies and additions to his physical form. During a boring afternoon, the evil cultist guy in his soul finally took over and promptly murdered the cleric, using 'Hoppers mouth to scream something about "violations" and weeping profusely. He regained control weeks afterward to realize he was suddenly a famous adventurer, having defeated some guy which was totally bad ass (even though he dosen't remember it. But he does have a fish souvenir thing.)

For bonus brownie points, who's gonna' score it/who will be on the OST?

Dragonforce, with a special guest appearance by Deathklok.

It'll be the most brutal movie ever.

Title: La Séptima Vuelta
(or, Seventh Time Around)

Who's playing your character?

Jericho: Jay Tavare (age 24)
Caleb: José MarÃ*a de Tavira (age 19)

Who's directing the movie? Marc Foster
What's the movie's genre? Drama/magical realism

What's the plot going to entail?

For 19 years, Caleb lived in a small apartment in the Colonia Doctores neighborhood of Mexico City. For four and a half of them, he was in school. For the last six, he was dealing drugs.

But after a rough confrontation with his father leaves him homeless and in the hands of an angry supplier's goons, Caleb wakes up not in hell as he expected, but in the bare-walled apartment of Jericó de Ã�rboles—a 20-something mechanic who happened to pass by when Caleb was attacked.

At first Caleb is glad to have a place to stay and a job at the autoshop with Jericó. But when a few of Jericó's “detours” on their way home from work lead them into more perilous brushes with the dark side of La Ciudad, Caleb begins to suspect that the soft-spoken mestizo is more than he appears.

Both young men will have to learn to face old scars and new fears in this tale of secrets, faith, and redemption. Marc Foster delivers a breathtaking dive into the rich and gritty culture of inner-city Mexico, where both seedy motels and old cathedrals peer down on two men trying desperately to pay their penance for past mistakes.

Score By: Klaus Badelt, with contributions from Switchfoot

Title: The Taishi Chronicles - Legion of Light

Producer: Peter Jackson
Director: Edward Zwick
Principal Composer: Hans Zimmer

Genre: Fantasy Epic

Tagline: And in the darkness... light.

Casting:

Ingwe Helyanwe - Shin Koyamada
Yuka Kanamai - Takako Matsu
Thomas Motokaji - Heath Ledger

Glorfindel Tinehtele - Orlando Bloom
Selinde Celebrindal - Keira Knightley
Nerdanel Celebrindal - Liv Tyler
Telchar Quakefist - Sean Connery

Arminas Ereinon - Marton Csokas
Nogeres (Ecthelion of Seregon) - Ian McKellen
Derthark Gunnson - John Rhys-Davies
Castor Valorshield - Sean Bean

Yoshi Sanada - Takeshi Kaneshiro
Kendal Alatariel - Emma Watson
Hitomi Alatariel - Kate Bosworth
Toshiie Yamato - Shido Nakamura
Yukimura Musashi - Ken Watanabe

Maeril Thyrrian - Eric Bana
Natosatael (voice) - Christopher Lee
Ar'zhanekkar - Andy Serkis
Angelus - Eva Green
Uysarji - Craig Parker

Plot:

One dark night, in the eastern isles of Nippon, a young man loses all that is dear to him. Seeking to rebuild the shattered pieces of his soul, he journeys far to the west, where an ancient evil threatens an elven homeland. Spurred on by the faintest of trails leading towards that which he has lost, the young man joins the fight... only to find that the shadows of darkness are not always what they seem...

Trailer:

Oriental buildings at night, fires tingeing the starlit sky with crimson tongues. Zoom in on the clash of steel, screams and goblin warcries. Focus on small group of warriors fighting towards a great hall.

Narration: "On an eve of benighted evil, one man thought he had lost everything."

Flash out to Ingwe, lying on his own in the midst of charred, ruined timber.

Narration: "Little did he know that destiny had only just been set in motion."

Picture a single tear streaming down his cheek, followed by the clenching of his fist. Cut to a darkened room, shadowy figures clustered around a white pedestal. Only one face is recognisable, that of Nogeres.

Nogeres: "And so it begins..."

***

Ingwe standing at the prow of a sleek caravel approaching Scara Brae, releasing Hayate into the fair skies.

Ingwe: "My name is Ingwe Helyanwe..."

Flash to Scarabrian tavern (the Auld Hoose) as the Legion is forming.

Ingwe: "... scholar..."

Flash to night-time duel between Glorfindel and Ingwe upon a different ship.

Ingwe: "... warrior..."

Flash to desperate battle against a swarm of fellbats, Ingwe casting a fireball.

Ingwe: "... mage."

Cut to Ingwe on his back, looking up at the victorious Glorfindel as Telchar and Selinde observe.

Telchar: "Ye've still a long way tae go, laddie."

***

Arminas giving speech to Legion in tavern. Lighting is dim, flickering of fires and candlelight casting grim shadows across expressions.

Arminas: "The ancient necromancer Xem'zund has risen once more to threaten our homeland."

Insert montage of undead horde attacking cities, overwhelming the elven defenders in their valiant last stand, population fleeing in horror from the atrocities, Ar'zhanekkar raising the newly fallen to add to the horde.

Arminas: "Numerous cities and fortresses have fallen before his onslaught, thousands lie dead in the wake of his armies, only to be revived to join his unholy forces."

Return to the tavern. Focus on the hooded Rangers clustered in the corner around Arminas; Nerdanel and Selinde.

Arminas: "The time has come for elf..."

Flash to Telchar and Derthark, the former slowly smoking from a pipe, the latter downing a pint with eyes glittering eagerly.

Arminas: "... dwarf..."

Flash to remainder of the occupants of the tavern, a motley crew of human volunteers - squire, peasant, merchant's son - with Ingwe amongst them.

Arminas: "... and man to unite against this common foe, to put aside their differences and stand as one!"

Fade to black, to roars of approval.

***

Sweeping vista montage. Three ships on the open seas, a mist-choked forest of dead and dying trees, gilded banners fluttering above besieged battlements of brilliant white, a desolate and abandoned moorland, dark grey mountains of jagged rock and treacherous snow, a never-ending horizon of crimson leaves.

***

Narration: "His travels took him to a faraway land embroiled in strife..."

Once more at the Auld Hoose, focus now on a dark-haired leather-clad huntsman objecting to Arminas.

Castor: "This cause is not ours to fight!"

Ingwe: "But we must fight it nonetheless!"

Narration: "... in search of something beyond his reach."

Return to the aftermath of the duel between Glorfindel and Ingwe, four figures huddled against the prow of the ship.

Glorfindel: "Why do you fight?"

Ingwe: "Not so long ago, I lost something I treasure dearly. Now I must find it."

Narration: "A tale of one man's courage in the face of death..."

That night in Nippon, Ingwe's despairing lunge as Yuka fades away into an arcane portal.

Ingwe: "No!"

Narration: "... determination in the face of despair..."

The white city of Anebrilith under attack by an undead army obscuring the horizon, Ingwe addressing the men under his command.

Ingwe: "We must protect the harbour at all costs!"

Narration: "... friendship in the face of adversity..."

Wights surround a small band of Legionnaires amongst mist-shrouded woods; Glorfindel, Selinde, Nerdanel, Telchar, and Ingwe.

Glorfindel: "Together?"

Ingwe: "Together."

Narration: "... and love against all odds."

Ingwe's dream sequence, his hand reaching desperately to grasp Yuka's as the world is torn asunder around him. Cut to reality, Yuka casting some form of spell with Natosatael looming darkly over her.

***

Another montage sequence, this time of battles. A massive explosion rocking the harbour walls of Anebrilith, causing them to crumble down around the defenders. Legionnaires and sailors desperately trying to fend off fellbats from the deck of a ship as a massive gryphon swoops overhead. Anebrilithian bladesingers and Elythisian guards fighting a rearguard action through the city streets of Anebrilith. Massed armies mobilising for war under the shadows of the Emyn Naug, alliance standing firm as a veritable tidal wave of zombies is sighted on the horizon.

***

Narration: "Produced by Peter Jackson of The Lord of the Rings, directed by Edward Zweig of The Last Samurai..."

Short clip of Ingwe drawing both swords in the misty forest, as the wights approach.

Narration: "Starring Shin Koyamada as Ingwe Helyanwe..."

Short clip of Yuka standing by Maeril and Natosatael as the undead horde and its human mercenaries prepare for battle.

Narration: "... Takako Matsu as Yuka Kanamai..."

Short clip of Thomas laughing slyly as Yuka follows him through a portal.

Narration: "... and Heath Ledger as Thomas Motokaji."

Cut to title scene, assembled elves, dwarves, and men facing down the enemy.

Narration: "The first tale in The Taishi Chronicles... Legion of Light."

***

Montage of pre-fighting scenes; elf, zombie, dwarf, fellbat, man, evil man.

Arminas: "For freedom!"

Montage continued; skyknights darting through the sky, necromancer casting spell, dragon summoned into existence, daemon roaring defiance to the skies.

Derthark: "For honour!"

Montage continued; Ingwe fighting his way through zombies, spots Yuka in the distance. Screen goes black.

Ingwe: "For you."

Credits flash.

Film Name: The Whole of the Moon
Directors: Terry Gilliam and Joss Whedon
[Screenplay: Neil Gaiman (since we're dreaming), from the novel by S.M.T.]

Genre: Fantasy/Action/Comedy

Cast
of The Company Esoterica
Cael Strandssen - Paul Bettany
Rasmus tor’Jeon – John Cusack
Amitala Sehgal - Parminder Nagra
Bromwyn Ladysmith – Joan Cusack
Nicklefiend [Voice] - Christopher Judge
"Tan Li" - George Takei

of the land
High Priest Or'tyr - Rufus Sewell
Priest Hojien - David Soul
Priestess Gillyian - Ertha Kitt
Priestess Heytia - Anne Hathaway
Acolyte Nevin - Jared Padelecki
Acolyte Ulsa - Bryce Dallas
Margus Iogal - Richard Dean Anderson

Pantheon [Those Who Help To Set The Sun]
Spinner of the Silent Flame [Voice] – Holly Hunter
Watcher of the Waves [Voice] – James LaBrie
He Who Sleeps In Chaos [Voice] - Crispin Freeman
She Who Breathes And Dreams In Blood [Voice] – Cate Blanchett
He Whose Horns Could Catch The Stars [Voice] - Vincent Ventresca

Music
Original Score: Michael Giacchino
Commercial Soundtrack: The Whole of the Moon - The Waterboys
The Ones That Help To Set The Sun - Dream Theater
That Voice Again - Peter Gabriel
Sunsets on Empire - Fish
In Your Honor - Foo Fighters
Acid Rain - The Europeans
Crying In The Rain - A-ha
The Shadow Proves the Sunshine - Switchfoot
First Breath After Coma - Explosions in the Sky
St. Elmo’s Fire - John Parr
The Whole of the Moon - h

Plot: A simple company of traveling performers happens upon a mysterious land in their wandering. When they investigate, they find things to be almost too good to be true - the nation is at peace with their neighbors, prosperous and governed justly. The people of this land want for nothing - they are healthy, they are fed, and they all care for one another as if the whole nation were one gigantic family. The performers are welcomed with open arms, and are glad to settle in to the culture of this paradise -

At first.

As time goes on, two of the youngest performers begin to sense that all is not as it seems, and -with their master- they begin to ask questions, searching for the answers. Their investigations begin to uncover ancient truths that the locals would rather not acknowledge: things about gods and sacrifices and pacts signed in blood that never should have been. It's up to them to free their friends from the powers that ensnare them...

And one young man learns a few unwelcome secrets about himself in the process.

Side Details: The Pantheon's naming style intentionally follows the title patterns of the Great Old Ones. They and Nicklefiend (a talking cat) would need to be a mixture of special effects and real actors or animals.

The whole movie's scenery would be a mixture of rain forest/tropical beach terrain, complete with pyramids and cities of white marble, beaches of white sand, and a sky where the stars seem too close.

Just a quick reminder, you guys have three more days to do submit movie ideas. This event will close at 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, January 1st. I'll be judging the entries either Monday night or Tuesday morning.

Alright, I'm extending the deadline to 11:59 p.m. on Wednesday, February 4th in case anyone else would like to submit an entry.

I'd also like to take this time to remind everyone participating in the tournament that these fate points are kind of a big deal. In a couple of weeks, half of you are going to need as many as you can get your hands on if you'd like to continue in the tournament. Better stock up now.

In the Dead of Night

Director: Quentin Tarantino

Genre: Gothic Fantasy mixed with Action-Adventure

The Cast

Elijah Belov: a younger Sean Bean

The Witch Hunter Marcus Salbretch: Christian Bale

The Holy Warrior Ciaphas: Bruce Willis

Mayor Eugeny: Timothy Spall

The Vampire Kincaid: Raymond Park


Music

Hans Zimmer

Howard Shore (Lord of the Rings soundtrack composer)


Plot

After a harrowing and exhausting journey to a number of foreign nations, the young sorcerer Elijah Belov is finally on the last leg of his trip home, traveling with a small caravan along a backwater road in central Salvar. Unfortunately, his tranquil traveling gets interrupted when passing through the town of Tirel. When the mayor (Timothy Spall) tries to have everyone in the caravan arrested and executed, the two ‘merchants’ leading the caravan (Christian Bale as Marcus Salbretch and Bruce Willis and Ciaphas) reveal themselves to be the most feared servants of the stern, omnipresent, and wrathful Church of the Ethereal Sway: witch hunters.

To Elijah’s dismay, the treachery of the mayor is the least of their worries. The two witch hunters had traveled to Tirel in secret to track down an infamous and deadly vampire, Kincaid – a foul abomination that has held the town under a dark, terrifying siege for months. Trapped between the witch fires of the Church and the fangs and claws of the undead, Elijah if forced into the service of the Sway to liberate the besieged town.

What hidden motives drive Marcus Salbretch to confront the vampire despite the damning odds? Can the young sorcerer survive both the Vampire’s foul designs and the zeal of the Sway, as well as the temptation and corruption from within? What terrors hide and wait in the dead of night?

This is a close one. I'm torn between Inkfinger's and Mikeavelli's pitches.

I could see Terry Gilliam, Joss Whedon, and Neil Gaiman totally going to town on Inkfinger's plot, pushing it into cult classic territory (with a warm mainstream perception).

On the other hand, I'm getting some Lemony Snicket vibes from Mikeavelli's movie, and would easily make a good two-parter like Tarantino's Kill Bill.

Hmmm...


I'm gonna' hand Inkfinger the victory and two fate points!

Mikeavelli, angered at my decision snub his movie, goes independent and makes it anyway. He submits it to the Sundance Film Festival, where he wins the Audience Award for a Dramatic Production. He gets one fate point and a pat on the back for the outstanding effort.

And for everyone else, thank you for participating. Now get back to work on writing Scary Movie 5, Saws 7-12, and 50 Cent's next album.