An Alyssa Snow Thread

Richter gave me this notebook today. I don’t get very many gifts. Well, at least gifts that I like. He said I should use it only when they’ve returned me to my room. He told me to write down what they won’t allow me to say. They don’t let me say anything, really. I’m only allowed to speak when spoken to and only allowed to answer their questions. If I say something they don’t like, I get punished. I don’t like their punishments, but sometimes it’s better than the tests anyway. Hurt less too.

Anyway, this is what Richter called a “diary”. My name is... Project number alpha one, series gamma 55a.5, trial number three. It looks like this on the papers: Project# a1 y55a.5 No.3. I don’t like that name very much. Most of the time, they just call me “Three” or “Number Three”. I don’t like that either. Many of the caretakers have better names, like Richter. I asked once why my name was so different, but I didn’t get food for a week. Before they moved me to this part of the place, there used to be other kids with numbers for names. Number One looked very sick; he was always crying and saying he hurt. Number Two didn’t speak and there was something wrong with her eyes. They always kept her head wrapped in bandages. When we were alone one day, she showed me. Instead of having normal eyes, they were all white and her tears were red like blood. She never seemed sad, but I guess they always cried. The bandages helped soak up her tears. There were only three of us.

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen either of them. The caretakers used to talk about them every once in a while during my tests, but it’s been a long time since I heard them talk about Number One. Yesterday, I heard them say Number Two failed a test. I haven’t failed a test yet, but I don’t think I want to. When they say I’m low in something or I need to improve, it means the next couple days will be really hard. I don’t want to think about what would happen if I failed. I hope Number Two is okay. I don’t have any friends down here, except maybe her and Richter. Out of all the caretakers, I like him the best.

Anyway, I should go. The next checkup should be in a few minutes and I don’t want to get caught. I like this “diary”. It’s like I have someone to talk to. I’ll talk to you soon, diary.

- No. 3