The Poems of the Nuclear Ragechild

A Haiku...

Heat, Flame, Passion, Rage
Nuclear prowess, insane
Incoming wrath, pain

How does it feel? You failed this time
You must be crushed, even if you tried
Everything you learned, all the paths of pain
It must really burn, that it was all in vein

You are so pathetic, little child of dolent
You are now elegiac, horrid inner torment
Do you feel good? You left your loved ones
What were you chasing? Fickle Glory? Now, you face condemnation

Regret, so much regret
Could of stopped her, could of saved him, could have been closer to him
Shame, so much shame
Ensnared in eternal cordolium

For shame, you selfish brat of selfish dreams
Just lie down and drown in your ignominy
If you never followed her, could of saved him, still lived with him
None of this would have happened

I remember…
How they taunted me, berated me, placed shame in me
I remember…
They loathed me for existing

I never asked to be born, especially from a father who was a rapist
I never asked to exist, especially from a mother who refused to own this
But now, I am here, from the neandethal father who was vengeance
Now, I am here. Must I pay for my family’s sins?

My mother disowned me, father never knew me
I bet he would not even care
My townsfolk spit at me, my rulers barely spared me
How on earth is this fair?

Walking down the streets with the uncle who took me in
I wonder if it was only out of pity…
The townsfolk whisper and jeer and me, I feel weakness
But he scoops me up and kisses my cheek

My cousin teaches me to fight the bullies
Inside, I am dishonored, I only feel angry
My uncle tries to tell my mother give me a chance
She turns away, spewing her wrath

Do you know how worthless, pathetic, useless I feel?
In this depressed, snow coated kingdom of bitter cold steel
Yet my uncle tells me of a land of growing greens
He will not take me there, across the frigid sea

To freedom…

Hey, uncle…
Why is the sky blue?
How tall can trees grow?
What types of magic and be used?
I would love to get out and roam…

Hey, cousin…
What is it like in Concordia’s deeps?
Have you seen lands even further beyond?
Adventure sounds exciting, I know it sounds silly
But I’d like to climb Akashima, to the very top

Hey, uncle…
You say the world was made by Old Gods
Then the Old Gods died in calamity
What was this tragedy, how did it go so wrong?
I want to know about all of Althanas’ history!

Hy, cousin…
Why do people do bad things?
I wanna stop them like you Rangers do
Why did the people in old home hate me?
Is there a way to make hearts change? I’d like to try to

Hey, cousin! Hey, uncle!
I want to explore this wonderful world
I want to learn all its secrets
I want to change this dangerous world!
From Berevar to Fallien, the farthest reaches…

I see nothing but ice
In your eyes
Violence, a force of vengeance
Slaughter anyone you deem not innocent

What are you doing?
Why are you doing this?
I used to see in black and white
But now it’s a putrid grey, with the blood you bathe in

I watch you torture at night
And I watch you hunt by day
You say you are doing what’s right
All I see is you causing pain

I’ll never be the same
You robbed me of clarity
All I see when I sleep is your cruel reign
Of terror, of wrath, of icy rage…

I've been through a lot, okay? When it first started, she noticed pathetic little me and took me under her wing. She had, oh, so much drive and passion. Nobody got in her way! That warm gleam in her eyes, that playful smirk on her face... She was charismatic but quiet and aloof. She had her struggles, she was a pretty poor leader. But oh, she was so, so amazing... But I only saw the good in her. She somehow kept her dark side from me...

... She had been to the hell and back again. She'd seen too much in her short life. When her husband died, she snapped. She left everything, her friends, her organization, her child... only I chased after her and she let me stay. I... didn't see it at first, but she changed. Oh, she changed. She used to be the most incredible person I knew, then... She turned. It was like a completely different person, and the new name she dawned further sunk that point in. She- nobody got in her way-! She believed she was right! All the time! Torture a man in front of his family? Too bad, she needed to find his bandit boss' base. Slaughter an entire party? They were slavers, they were treated like they had no souls. And when I tried to stop her- she - she - she hurt me... she hurt me...

I thought… I thought… I was significant to her. We used to be close, but she just... tossed me aside. It was like she hated me. The-the bond was faintly there, but I could hardly see it. It was too much, she was too much... In the name of justice, she killed. The Executioner of the Wicked, she committed horrible acts to save the world from criminals... when she was only a criminal herself. She was a monster. I... I had to leave... But she scared me. She hurt me. She scarred me.

Please do not go
Do not leave me, Shinsou…
I lost too much already
Why did you have to fall away from me?

I lost control
You were not the first one, Shinsou
I could not control their fates, either
And every time, I wish I was stronger…

Not if I can help it!
Not this time!
I will do whatever it takes
I will save you now through new power gained…

I am in control now! Hear me?
I am in control of new destiny! Me! Understand? Me!

Pain from memories
Tortured in my dreams
Silenced by my fears
Drowning in my tears

If only I could turn back time
Now I am a shell of myself, traumatized

If only I could of stopped her, saved him, stayed with him…

She bleeds, she falls, she rises again…
You have made a grave mistake.

Dies Irae
Melt in flames
The beast charges, enraged

Dies Irae
Mindless monster, no use running away
Lie down, except your fate

Your shop was cluttered, I remember the smells of potions and salves
You were always working on another concoction, your long hair over your brow
You called me sister, nicknamed me Little Snowflake, helped me to learn of my powers
I miss you, Nevin… Did you fall when the End of All Things crashed down?

They told me I was nothing
They told me I was a mistake
They told me I deserved suffering
For the crime of existing, I was a bane

Well, I will prove them wrong
I walk with a confident stride
I will most certainly prove them wrong
I rise up in anger and fight the lies

I know I can find purpose
I feel the calling to something bigger
I know I am more than worthless
A thorny rose growing in winter

I… I… I am… Felicity Rhyolite
I am joy, fury, curiosity, shame, an enigma
I do not need your approval to be me
I am a flame burning in the darkest night.

I see red.

Oh, I could take you, break you, crumble you into dust!
I could twist you, torture you, subjugate you to a fate worse than death!
I wish I could kill you! Revenge fantasies play in my mind…
If only I could make you see all the pain I’ve felt

I break furniture, I scream in my room
I wish every chair I broke was you
Don’t you dare justify your reasons for your wretched actions! You filth!
I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!

I wish I could watch all you love burn
And with nothing to even wear you drown in despair
And I laugh as sweet revenge is completed!
Then- ….

Then…

….

Then, I cry, because I just thought of that…

If I did what I wish
If I tortured or even killed you
Am I a monster, like you were?
Am I a creature for wishing harm on others?
I wish, I so desperately wish, that I could take my anger out on you…
But I’m better than that. At least I should be…

Flamebird receives 1495 EXP and 135 GP.

All rewards added.