Team Registration - Whispers in the Wind

[Petoux]

The art of surprise usually comes from the elves, but it looks like Sara got a taste of her own medicine when a protective barrier appeared over the old man in the blink of an eye and sent the arrow flying off of him and into the woods.

The shield rippled from the strain of the attack, but it was enough to make her bow almost completely useless. It was now time for close encounters until she could back off more.

...

Yet, once again, another surprise. A bronze colored ring with the shape of two fists emitted a strong energy knocking the bow right out of her hands and pushing her back a little ways.

If my bow wasn't in the way, I would be the one taking on the blast not the bow. Looks like I got lucky.

The bow launched quickly out of her hands onto the path, laying a little far aways to be used again if she could manage to pick it up.

Short sword or daggers?

...

Sara thought quickly as she remembered in her weapon training ... when it's this close, daggers are your friend vs the sword.

She reached for both of her daggers and pulled them out, having one in each hand. She twirled them around several times each having the blades at a slight angle so she could have better control over them.

With her enchanced speed of a human, she twirled around faster than a normal human and aimed one of the daggers right towards the underpart of the mans' neck as the other aimed for the side of his body.

If the body one connected, she would raise it up quickly heading towards his shoulder and then pull it out quickly ... if the neck one connected, she would try to push him over , and then quickly grab her bow and fire.

Being rammed left her a tiny bit dazed, but other than that ... she was fine ... minus the bow.

[Mikeavelli]

'Hopper grinned, and watched Sara twirl the blades for a moment before she came at him, he's even got time for a short taunt, "Already three steps ahead've ye, Miss."

She didn't seem to realize his Force Shield wasn't just a one-time thing, and it wasn't at all useless in hand to hand combat. With both his swords facing behind him, he appeared open and unguarded, certainly a quick rush with a pair of daggers might have scratched him without it, but all he has to do is brace forwards and meet her daggers with the shield.

Simultaneously, his right arm is spinning around, shifting Lucky from the backhand to a forehand grip while it comes around his back and over his head.

He's not nearly as fast as she is, but his sense of timing is perfect, at the very instant her daggers impact his shield, she should be slightly off-balance, providing the perfect moment for him to strike back. The shield, having served its purpose, would fade away to leave his own counterstrike unimpeded. Styx, in his left hand, would come almost straight up, lashing out at her left forearm, where he assumed her armor would be lighter, and the dark sawtooth blade would have a good chance to penetrate it.

And he had yet another trick up his sleeve. Lucky came slicing down towards her right shoulder, completing a scissorlike strike with his twin swords. She was right to think he wouldn't be as effective with his long swords against someone like Sara who could dash in past his defenses, even if it struck true it probably wouldn't make more than a flesh wound, but while Lucky came down, it flared to life like a new sun, emitting a startling, blinding light directly in front of Sara's eyes.

[Petoux]

Sorry I didn't post earlier. The server was down, then I thought the tourny started on the 28th ... not sure why.

Anyway ... don't worry about it.

Let's get this over with hmmmm?

A shield block ... Sara was temporarily stunned as she stepped back a couple of steps from the harsh blow as two swords came right towards her.

With her keen elvish eyes and speed, the swords seem to go in slow motion. Sara had an idea, but she had to react fast.

She quickly and purposefully dropped to the ground lying on her back as she made a slight thud as the swords glanced right over her body.

It worked! But at what price? She had to think quickly again ... not much time...

What now?

She rolled out of the way as one of the swords finished coming down and sliced the back of her dress a little bit as it pierced her skin and started to bleed. Nothing to serious at all, for it could have been a lot worse if even deadly!

She was near her bow now as it was still ready with an arrow. She quickly picked it up and fired without aiming towards Hopper as it headed straight for his upper thigh.

[Mikeavelli]

She ken still see! Hmph, mus' be an elf thing. No worries.

In contrast to the rushing, almost panicked Sara, 'Hopper was calm and composed, not even breathing heavily. He walked forwards while Sara was rolling about for her bow, twirling both his swords into a backhand grip, and raising both his hands towards her.

"I wouldn't be doin' that iffin' I were you, Miss. See, ye've already tried it once." His force shield flickers back into view, she's made a miscalculation if she thinks she destroyed it, the thing just gets in the way when he's trying to go on the offensive. He's already angled it to make sure if she fires that arrow, it'll glance off harmlessly.

"ye've lost. Give up 'afore I 'ave ta' smash ye' ta' splinters ta' prove it."

His shield is up, his Ring of the Ram is pointed straight at her, and he's positioned himself perfectly, close enough to make it nearly impossible to avoid the effects of his ring, far enough away that he'll be able to see any sneaky surprises coming a mile away. If she goes through with it and fires off her bow, he'll deflect it aside with the Force Shield, and proceed to fire off his other ring.

If she actually listens to reason and surrenders, he'll be keeping his guard up until she's disarmed.

[Petoux]

"ye've lost. Give up 'afore I 'ave ta' smash ye' ta' splinters ta' prove it."

"Alright, alright! You win!"

She threw down her bow, daggers, and sword. "You are quite masterful with your sword. I've heard of a tournament a brewing somewhere to the North. My name is Sara, I am quite good at a bow and arrow. With my wits and speed along with long range attacks, and your masterfulness with the sword and sheer force, we would make a formidable team. What do you say .... friend?"

She reached out her hand to shake his waiting for his agreement.

OMG, I gots a flesh wound from you!!

[Mikeavelli]

"Aye, 'jus so long as ye' dinnae keep firing at sods so close they ken' jus' run up and chop ye', we'll make a good team." 'Hopper took her hand and gave her a hearty shake.

"Tha' Tournament's what I came here for, If ye' remember what we was talking about 'afore we started dancin'." With that, he turns north, and starts walking, "C'mon, it should be startin' real soon. We dinnae' want ta' be late."

[Max Dirks]

Judgment

Note, the score only reflects the first 2000 words.

Story: 2.6/5 ((The story was simple, but it highlighted something you did perfectly. You had excellent interaction. The way you responded to one another's posts was exactly what I was trying to convey in my Battle FAQ. I would like permission to use portions of your registration to display interaction. Please PM me if that's fine.))

Character: 2.3/5 ((Relying on dialogue is an excellent way to show and develop character. That said, I feel no true or lasting connection with your characters and was not excited to read on (the exception to that being a hint by 'Hopper that he was in the tournament for a friend, which I wanted to learn more about). The characters just seemed bland. Granted, it is hard to develop characters in few words, this is something I want you to work on in the tournament proper)).

Writing Style: 2.1/5 ((Vegna, you need to change your writing a bit. You use the same pronouns and the same sentence structure over and over again. Mix it up a bit and you'll find that your writing scores increase tenfold. Mike, your writing was good until you began 'Hoppers actions. At that point, you lost the clarity you had at the beginning. I think this might be a result of the old Ayenee T1 battle mantra. You're a good storyteller, so rely on that more than trying to meticulously describe your character's actions. Avoid using run-ons so much and you can expect this number to increase. As a side note, Vegna, using names in prose is acceptable. You can only say "the strange man" in so many ways until it becomes a hassle.))

7/15 or 46.67/100