Round One, Bracket B: Dark Bullet vs. Karakuri

[Scriptwriter667]

Out of Character: Okay... I apologize for shadowing. I have removed all of what I have wrote involving your words, actions, etc. and now regret it to continue the story. Carry on...

In Character:

Evan gripped his pistol again and aimed at the man's chest, cocking the hammer a second time to make sure he had himself protected.

"Honestly, I would love to give him a chance, but if doesn't move this sword, I will have to put a bullet inbetween his eyes and end it cold and fast." Evan then aimed it from his elbow on the ground. "Now... what's it going to be? A bullet from my pistol, or a magical burst of energy or whatever my partner calls it."

"Dammit, Evan." Alecia said.

"Dammit, what?! Get this guy off of me!"

[Gyzmo Gadjiltron]

Wind rushed against the young boy's face as he was suspended about fifty, or sixty feet in the air. Gyzmo continued on floating in the air, he rubbed his left cheek first. Then rubbed his other cheek, then groaned. "Why... Why in the hell... Did it have to be so early..?" He mused to himself, as he continued on traveling in the air. His backpack, which contained his four tentacles; Which two had extended out to a good twelve meters long. As their three sharp hook-like claws were extended and spinning in a clockwise direction in a extremely rapid speed. And since they were really well built, and made by the strongest items: Titanium, and diamond shards. They each possessed strength durable to lift about 1.8 tons, but with the combination of strengths they could lift more than the peak level.

The morning sun that peaked out from the horizon, gave out a good glimpse at him where the massive serpent creatures hovering behind him which kept him airborne shined, and became lustrous. "I don't like morning fights.. But oh well, my partner.. Eh.. Katie? Kat.. Something wanted me to show up.." He shrugged then continued, he then scanned around the steel bridge. "What the..." He suddenly said.

Destruction stood among the bridge, where: Trucks, SUV's, and etc. They were either on their side, or damaged. He gazed around some more, then he commanded his two tentacles to lower him down slowly. But he froze then turned his new attention towards his partner, and two figures beside him. "Ah, that can't be good.." He groaned lightly.

He landed silently by a large sixteen wheeler, it apparently had no driver so he didn't worried about it moving or honking. He snapped his fingers silently, which triggered two other tentacles to slither out from his damaged backpack from behind him. The new massive serpents slithered out then spun their claws on top of their heads then glanced at their owner. "Alright Tri , and Tetra. Zap Scope." The twin snakes nodded, on the heads where a dull red glow appeared; Which was a large ruby embedded inside the head, but with the help of nano chips it gave each separate tentacle master computers intelligences and as well as human instincts. They each had a roman number embedded against the ruby jewel: I, II, III, and IV.

Slowly they slithered against each other, slowly silent slots against the bodies of the tentacles slid open. They assembled against each other, after finishing the fusion of one large body; At the end, a long barrel suddenly appeared. But three claws were closing the barrel end, while three spikes which were the claws stuck out from on top of the body which glowed with electrical energy. The three claws on the end of the barrel slowly opened up, making it look like a cool barrel now. Well, Gyzmo thought. A scope opened up, he squinted his emerald eye into it. Slowly aiming towards his targets, he aimed at a man who was seemingly laying down on the ground, holding a gun to his partner. As well, as a woman who was holding a staff against his partner. "Two of 'em." He whispered, the weight from the long weapon weighed him down a bit. So he shook his back gently, where one more serpent escaped then gripped onto the massive truck now holding him. He grinned in satisfaction, then once again took aim. "Lock on..."

Pulled a trigger where one of the slots had opened up, which released a electrical build up energy out. He was aiming at the laying mans' hand which held a handgun of some sort, the energy bursted out in a rushing speed. Almost like a sniper rifle shot, he then quickly locked onto the woman, then pulled the trigger immediately. The same energy fired out, the destination of the strike was at her arms which held the staff. "Sorry if I was late.." He said sorrowfully to his partner.

[Scriptwriter667]

A shot hit his hand, making Evan drop his weapon. Noticing that there was no structural damage to the barrel or the gun itself, Evan grabbed it again and aimed it, yet keeping it at his side.

"Is THAT your partner?" Evan asked, still pointing the handgun at him. "Pretty much a stand-off here, eh?" He then tried to see if the man's partner was coming by, which he was. Evan tried to move away, but was not able to on the count of the sword moving from his neck to his chest. Now... he had a small choice to either move again and die by the hands of a sword, or not move and shoot him while he wasn't looking. Only by rare despairity would he get out alive, with his head on his shoulders or his dignity in check.

[Christoph]

Thank you for participating! Mathias will judge this battle shortly. Please do not contact your judge regarding the judgment until after it has been posted.

[Taskmienster]

I am the thief of threads, and this thread is my next target. If you have any questions or concerns just PM me.

Scriptwriter667 | Alecia Crawford | [/out of possible]

Storytelling 1.5 | 1.5 | [/5]
Setting 3 | 2 | [/10]
Script, your setting was… missing a lot. You explained a little bit about where you were, but it was in a way that was almost completely lacking anything interesting. It was almost as if you were just telling the reader instead of showing the reader what was going on.
Pacing 3 | 3 | [/15]

Dialogue 4 | 3.5 | [/10]
Action 5 | 3.5 | [/15]
Persona 4 | 4.5 | [/10]

Mechanics 6 | 6 | [/10]
Technique 4 | 3 | [/10]
Script… you at least tried.
Clarity 5 | 5.5 | [/10]
Wild Card 1 | 1 | [/5]
According to the rules you are not allowed to edit a post after it has been written. However, since your opponent asked you to fix it I won’t hold it against you, but the reason for having to edit it makes me question the validity of it as well as the reason behind it.

Total 40 | 33.5 | [/100]
Average [36.75]



Getsuako Kato | Gyzmo Gadjiltron | [/out of possible]

Storytelling 2 | 1 | [/5]
Setting 4 | 3 | [/10]
Pacing 5.5 | 4.5 | [/15]

Dialogue 4 | 4 | [/10]
Action 6.5 | 4.5 | [/15]
Persona 5 | 3 | [/10]

Mechanics 6 | 6 | [/10]
Getsuako: far too many short, choppy sentences. You also have ‘he’ an awful lot of times, where you could try using a few more synonyms in place of it.
Technique 5.5 | 3.5 | [/10]
Clarity 5 | 5 | [/10]
Wild Card 2 | 1 | [/5]
Don’t write JUST ooc posts.

Total 45.5 | 35.5 | [/100]
Average [40.5]

Rewards:

Script is the only one to have enough posts to qualify for exp/gp, he gets 500 exp and 75 gold

The winning team gets 2 fate points.

[Taskmienster]

exp and gp added