Karaoke Masters Deluxe Edition (Open to all)

[Satanfoot Blocker]

Satanfoot waddled into the bar. People turned at the sound of his over exasperated breathing. Yes, thier stares let him know that though he had never been to this town before; though he had never stept foot in this bar, they knew he came to rock! He slowly made his way to the DJ. The walk took a long time, not only because he was unable to walk much faster than this, as he took in the wondering eyes of the croud. He leaned in, and told the DJ his selection before walking back across the room to the old dusty bar.

"Give me a Tequila Rose, make it a double." He said in his most manly voice. The awe on the bartenders face was apparent. Yes, Satanfoot blocker was like a hero to the people of this bar. This town needed someone like him, and he was happy to oblige. The bartender was a slender young thing, with dark brown hair reaching nearly to her bottom. She must have been from the islands, her body'd been kissed by the sun. The smell of coconut replaced the smell of the bar, and he wasn't sure if it was her or the rum. Oh wait, he was drinking Tequila rose, must be the bartender.

Satanfoot looked to the small stage, and watched the performance. Two Dwarven women sang "Dontch" with lots of heart, and lots of sour notes. Thier attempt at the performance was enjoyable, but far from his level. Oh yes, Satanfoot blocker would show these people what Karaoke was truly about. As the girls finished tiher song, they bowed gracelessly and handed the mic's back to the DJ.

"Up next, we have Satanfoot Blocker. It's Satanfoot's first time singing with us tonight so everyone give him a hand."

Satanfoot walked with determination towards the stage. He grabbed the mic and bowed his head to wait for the opening notes. The music started, and he was off....

"All the single ladies, All the single ladies, OH OH OH OH OH OH OH, OH OH OH OH OH OH OH. If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it, if you liked it...."

[Enigmatic Immortal]

Jensen sniffed the bar air like something sour had just entered his nostrils. He took a few more wafts just to let it sink into his olfactory and he wrenched as he shot straight up knocking the two women who had been leaning on him over. He sniffed the air some more like a caged animal and his lips pursed into a disgusted snarl. He wretched a little in the back of his throat and he began to grab things around him as he quickly sniffed them to see where the hell this horrid stench came from.

Was it the End Times in his hand he had been drinking? He sniffed it twice, took a strong blink as he pushed it away. No, that had it’s own kick to it. He grabbed the edges of his coat and sniffed. No, that wasn’t it, but he did need to wash it he concluded.

He bent low and offered his hands to the woman he was smooth talking. They grinned taking his hand and he pulled them up leaning into each and sniffing them like a dog. Aside from outrageous amounts of perfume they were clean from this abomination of a smell.

He stood up and looked around the bar, his corner booth shielding him from most of the outside noise so he could operate on the women behind him. He sniffed again and nearly vomited. At last he found the source. It was some ugly fat bozo who was singing without shame in the air. Accompanying his disgusting lyrics was a dance akin to a beached whale in heat. He rolled his shoulders, he seductively winked to the crowd of fan girls who swayed with him. A rush of single women flocked to him, dancing in step as Jensen’s eyes widened as he became fully aware of what he was smelling.

It was the stench of shamelessness! A rancid odor mixed by all the women in the bar who were single and a fat conductor who preyed upon them. Jensen couldn’t understand it and he was thankful the other men in the bar agreed with his confused looks. He looked back to see his concubines run towards the dance floor holding each others hands as they each stuck their tongues out to the immortal before dancing in the forming conga line.

The knight moved towards the bartender and he thumbed the stage.

“How many are next?” Jensen asked.

“After this performance?” she tilted her head down to him like he was insane for even asking. “Nobody. Who the hell can follow that up?” Jensen let his grin widen.

“I can,” he leaned in forwards and wrote the name of the song he wanted to sing on a piece of paper. The bartender gave him a wary lance before she passed the note along to the master of ceremonies. Jensen waited until the song was over before he took his spot on the stage in the wings. He watched Satansfoot walk away as the throng of women all shouted his name.

“Coming up next,” the announcer stated. “Is Jensen Ambrose. He’s another virgin to this singing bar, so let’s all make him feel welcome!” He clapped for the immortal as he took center stage and the people in the audience all applauded as he took the mic and looked down to his feet in prayer.

His heart beat in anticipation, his face felt sweaty as the thousands of eyes looked to him. When the music hit he let the emotions and the passion of the song writer’s intent pour forth from him and then looking up with quick motions he began to sing,

“There’s only two types of people in the world,” he tipped down and winked to a woman who instantly knew the song and squealed. “The one’s that entertain and the one’s that…observe,” he feigned fainting as he swooned back on his heels before he twirled back to the audience thrusting his hips. “Well baby I’m a 'put on show' kinda girl. Don’t like the back seat; gotta be first!” he winked to the audience. “I’m like the ring leader, I call the shots. I’m like a fire cracker, I make it hot when I put on a show.”

He let his soul move in time with the beat, letting the music pick up within him as his feet moved like they had a life of their own.

“Feel the adrenaline movin my veins… Spotlight… on me and I’m ready to break. I’m like a performer, the dance floor is my stage. Better be ready, hope that you feel the same!”

Jensen dove forward, splitting before the crowd letting the light wash over him as he moved back to a vertical base slowly without even bothering to use his hands.

“All eye’s on me in the center of the ring just like a circusss…”

[Kupo!]

The heir to the Toy Maker’s legacy sat upon his padded throne in the back of the bar. He rubbed his temples as heard the grating singing voices of the two men before him and he had had enough. Looking over to his most loyal toy dolls he nodded as he removed his bowler hat.

A red pom pom rose to the heavens as the frugal moogle Duke Dom Kupo let his hands slam onto the table shaking the glass that held his dry martini, which he didn’t think was very dry at all. He let his furry paw move softly up to the edge of the glass as he massaged it.

“My Kipoship,” a small yellow sheep said with reverence as he lazily stuck his tongue out. Duke let his palle wash in the dry taste of the martini as he softly swallowed before placing the glass upon the table. “At your orders, Kipo, I can exterminate these fools.” Duke’s eyes widened.

“What?” Duke shouted. “Exterminate them? For what, kupo?” he asked getting sweaty as the tiny sheep like creature shrugged.

“I dunno, Kipo. Seemed like the thing to do.” Duke shook his head. Tim, the yellow sheep, was a Yan. A mentally challenged sheep like creature with all the pent up desires to destroy the world wasted upon chasing butterflies and leprechauns. He also said kipo a lot, which annoyed Duke because it was a failed attempt to say Kupo, something Duke did as a byproduct of being a moogle.

“Well, until you have good reason keep your destruction to yourself, kupo!” he looked to the stage as the women swooned. He got up and walked over to the bartender, his tiny bat like wings fluttering behind him begging the question why he was walking if he had wings. When he approached the bartender he began to knock on the wooden bar, his size only three feet. She looked around, looked over the edge, and she cooed as she saw him reaching for his pom pom to touch it.

Duke pulled back lifting up a warning finger. “Please don’t touch the pom pom. Who’s next, kupo?” The woman shrugged.

“You if you want it, sweetie.” Duke nodded as he climbed the bar stool waiting for the man to stop singing. “The song you wish to sing?” she asked preparing to write it down. Duke instead turned and wrote it down for her.

“Oh my, isn’t that a bit…edgy?” Duke nodded.

“My point!” he said as he got on stage and waited in the wings. He watched the human performer blow kisses to all the women as he made his exit. He donned his bowler hat again as he took in a deep breath. He was ready for this. He noticed Tim had led all his other friends to the front of the stage, they all looking to him and ready to rock.

“Our next singer! Dom Kupo, Duke Dom Kupo!” he clapped as the audience did in return like mindless sheep. He took the microphone and pointed to the audience.

“IT SEEMS TO ME, KUPO,” He shouted letting his voice grate against the back of his larynx. “THAT WE GOT A BUNCH OF SISSIES! LET’S ROCK THIS!” And with that the music played a heavier, more metallic beat. As it picked up within seconds Duke’s voice changed range to a deep, beastial guttural cry as he sang out. Instantly the men in the audience dove forward, cheering for him while his tiny doll comrades began to a mosh pit.

“It’s time to play the game! It’s TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!” He laughed darkly as the music continued on, the women fleeing as the men began head bashing. “It’s all about the game and if you can play it! All about control, and if you can take it! It’s all about your debt, and if you can pay it! It’s all about pain, and it you can take me!” The growing mob of attendance echoed his words as they all furiously jumped in their appointed spots, singing with the moogle. He lifted his mic into the air with a furious fist as he beat his head in time with the others.

“I am the game, you don’t want to play. I am control, no way can shake me. I am heavy debt…AND I KNOW YOU CAN’T PAY ME, KUPO! I am your pain...” he looked darkly to his growing fans. "And I know you can't take me!"

Off in the corner the bartender turned to the master of ceremonies and gave him a very confused look. “Do you know any of these songs?” she asked honestly. He shrugged.

“Never heard one of em.”

Duke bent over and lifted up, spitting water all over his screaming fans as he continued to sing.

[Amber Eyes]

“And here’s KYLA!” Anita giggled as the two slightly inebriated girls entered the dusty bar. Anita’s laughter spread to Kyla quickly, and soon neither girl was able to move. In an attempt to stay off the floor, Kyla grabbed a pool table…or so she thought. She had in fact grabbed a pool stick that was laying on the pool table. The resulting thud received lots of attention.

“You have….to…be…the biggest…klutz…I’ve..ever…met!” Anita gasped between fits of laughter. The girls lay tangled on the floor, the room spinning slightly. “I told you you’d have fun!”

“I don’t usually consider lying on the dirty floor of a bar fun, but whatever you say!” Kyla laughed as she pulled herself to her feet. “But with a view like that….”

Anita pulled herself up and saw what Kyla was talking about. A tall man stood near the far corner of the bar. His coat reached his ankles, covering most of him, but it still showed a nice silhouette. As he turned, Anita again became nearly incoherent with laughter.

“What’s so funny? He’s gorgeous!” Kyla said in disbelief.

“Well…if you weren’t such a hermit you’d see that view much more often.”

“What are you talking about.”

“That’s the perv who is staying 5 doors down from you! Let’s get a drink.”

The two girls approached the bar, and stared at each other.

“What’ll it be?” The bartender asked.

“Um…what do you have that doesn’t taste like alcohol?” Kyla whispered.

“Not much of a drinker huh?”

“Well…I had two beers on the way over…so I guess….no…not really.”

Kyla turned as a familiar tune began to play behind her. Her eyes locked onto the man, whom Sei had called Jensen. He began to sing and her breath was gone. She whispered something to Anita, and the girl was on stage in moments.

One more singer and it was Kyla’s turn. Kyla thought she saw someone stabbed in the mosh pit that had begun in the corner but she couldn’t be sure. She tried to calm the butterflies as the DJ began to speak.

“Now we’d like to welcome to the stage….Kyla Orlouge for her first time tonight. Helping her out with this next one will be a crowd favorite…Jensen!”

[Enigmatic Immortal]

Jensen’s eyes shot wide open as his head jerked to the side faster than a speeding bullet. He looked to the stage and found a woman dressed in very tight short denim jeans, like a pair that she grew out of and decided to cut. She wore a tied off shirt that just cut below her breasts and he felt all the blood in his brain flush downwards as he became dumbfounded.

The women in the bar all clapped wildly as they cheered for Jensen, and he couldn’t’ understand it. Before long he was escorted forward where he climbed the stage and looked into the gorgeous ocean blue eyes of the girl before him. She was a youngling, but she reeked like she had been drinking for a bit. Still the terror of performing on stage must have sobered her up as he smiled to her, a genuine charming smile as he heard the music pick up softly.

He softly let his hand out to her as he sang, “I can show you the world. Shining shimmering, splendid,” he pulled back. “Tell me princess when did you last let your heart... decide?” He took her hand and spun her softly forward before letting her go and using his unique caeiporiea fighting stance to keep his balance.

“I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder,” He moved under her outstretched hand, rubbing against her softly with his back. “Over sideways and under on a magic carpet ride! A whole new world!” He sang, much to the joy of the women as they cheered for him. “A new fantastic point of view!” He smiled. “No one tell us, ‘no’, or where to go! Or say we’re only dreaming…” he held her hands up to his chest, which she twirled into and sang,

“A whole new world,” she sang beautifully. “A dazzling place I never knew!” She stomped his foot hard with her hell and the immortal suppressed the urge to scream as he dropped to one knee. “But now from way up here, it’s crystal clear, that now I am in a whole new world with you!” She opened her arms out to the sky as she built up wind for her next verse.

“Unbelievable sights! Indescribable feelings,” she winked to Jensen and he forgot his pain. “Soaring, tumbling, revealing through an endless diamond sky! A WHOLE NEW WORLD!” she sang with passion.

“Don’t you dare close your eyes!” Jensen sang as he moved behind her, both back to back as they sang from their hearts.

“A hundred thousand things to see!”

“Don’t hold your breath, it gets better!” He turned to her as their hands met against their chests.

“I’m like a shooting star!” they sang. “I’ve come so far!” they pointed out to the stars together as they pushed away.

“I can’t go back to where I used to be!” Kayla sang.

“A whole new world! With new horizons to pursue!” They both made a daring adventurous leap towards the edge of the stage ending in a super heroes pose, both smiling as they sang.

“I’ll chase them anywhere!” they sang as one. “There’s time to spare,”

“Let me share this whole new world with you!” Jensen sang softly as the two began to move as one, dancing along the stage like professional dancers while the music picked up. The women screamed for them as the men cheered for Jensen.

“A whole new world!” Kayla sang deep within her. “A new fantastic point of view!”

“A whole new world!” Jensen sang as harmony.

“No one to tell us no, or where to go!” They became one again as they held each other tight before pushing away as they sang to the heavens. Each echoing the other in perfect harmony.

“Or SAY we are only dreamin!” Kayla lifted her hand into the air.

“A whole new world!” Jensen said rapidly.

“A new turn of surprise.”

“With new horizons to pursue,

“Every moment gets better,”

“I’ll chase them anywhere! There’s time to spare!” They embraced as they built up for the finale.

“Anywhere!” Kayla sang out, the word lingering in the wind like beautiful song note.

“There’s time to spare!” Jensen’s words flowed with passion as he motioned out with his hands to emphasize just how much time they had.

“Let me share this whole…” They stepped close to each other, Jensen’s fingers locking with hers as they got close.

“New world,” Both whispered loudly. They moved deeper to each other’s faces. “With…you…” They let the words die out in harmony, both tones mixing as one in a melody that made the gods cry. The bar exploded into a fit of clapping as Jensen and Kayla both breathed heavily from their performance. Jensen gave her a wink before he motioned for the exit.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he whispered into her ear, smiling.

((Post dedicated to Jessica and Eddie, hope you enjoyed it. It’s also dedicated to everyone who ever dared to dream of a magic carpet ride!))

[Satanfoot Blocker]

This scene had gotten a bit too mushy for the karaoke superstar. And who exactly were all these people? Why were they good? Usually in a bar like this you got one or two people who could carry a tune, and the rest well...that's why they invented earplugs. Satanfoot realized he needed to act quickly or he would lose his audiance to this Jensen kid. The girl was good too, but lets face it, she wasn't competition. The other guy...What was he even screaming about? Was that a dead body by the restroom? There was a definite problem here, no one was paying him anymore attention. He quickly waddled to the stage and grabbed the mic. One of his many catchphrases was sure to do the trick.

"Meanwhile...back at the farm, Granny's beating off the indians and they're still coming...."

Sure enought the place went silent. He wispered a few words to the bartender then the music filled his ears.

He put one leg out to the side and bowed his head to the left. He began to shake his chubby leg to the beat. As the music hit the crescendo he looked up at the crowd.

"I made it through the wilderness. Somehow I made it throu-hoo-hoo. Didn't know how lost I was until I found you."

He ran as fast as his little legs would carry him and climbed on top of the closest table.

" I was beat, incomplete, I'd been had I was said and blue, but you made me feel, yeah you ma-ha-ha-de me feel shiny and new..." As the words left his mouth, the table split in two, sending the man to the floor. Three large guys lifted the man with great effort just in time for his next line.

"like a virgin, touched for the very first time, like a virgin, when your heart beats next to mine. " As he sang the men set him back on his feet.

He waddled up to a pretty young girl in a blue dress, stroking her cheek with his chubby fingers.

"Gonna give you all my love boy, my fear is fading fast. I've been saving it all for you cause only love can last." He dropped to his knees at her feet. It wasn't a long way to go, but it was still slightly noticeable.

"Your so fine, and your mine. You make me strong, yeah you make me bold. Oh your love thawed out, yeah your lo-ho-ho-ve thawed out what was scared and cold."

As he sang the rest of the song, he made his way back to the stage, knowing he had these people eating out of the palm of his fat little hand.

[Kupo!]

Duke wasn’t sure of his chances of winning this karaoke thing, but he would be damned if he didn’t go down swinging. The duet with the girl and the human was impressive, but nothing he hadn’t witnessed before in the back of a very crowded cart in downtown Lavinya.

He learned a lot about the human anatomy he wished he could burn out of his tiny moogle eyes.

“Kipo!” Tim shouted, his tiny legs trotting in place as he watched the fat human sing a song about virginity and the feeling he got when he thought about it. As far as the tiny sheep could understand love meant you had terribly bad gas in your stomach and you had the urge to pee really, really badly. It also could lead to heart attacks.

“Kupo!” Duke corrected him with a shout as he sighed thinking is more edgy side needed a break. Instead, he would have to just show up this Satansfoot fellow. The moogle made short determined steps to the bar and floated up to the barstool. The bar tenders face was full of a mixture of revulsion and happiness as the portly man struck a pose and moon walked across the stage. She glanced to the moogle, who wrote his next request which she took and handed to the master of ceremonies.

The moogle waited as the announcer called him up, and this time he came fully loaded as he pulled out the cane and top hat from his bag of tricks and taking center stage. He waited tapping his foot as the beat began to pick up, and then when it was time he sung with all his moogle glory,

“Wel~l I guess it would be nice,” The moogle wobbled his hips as he twirled the cane one handed. “If I could touch your bod~y. I know not everybod~y has a body like you!” He lifted the cane up and pointed to one of the woman in the crowd and she swooned as the women screamed for him, Tim and the other dolls all dancing in place.

“But I’ve got to think tw~i~ice, before I give my heart away, I know all the games you play, cause I play them too-kupo!” he waltzed off the stage, dancing in the circle of women as they all moved around him like he were a ritual fire, their hands moving up and down in praise as he lavished them with soft words of song.

“O~h but I need some time off,” he lifted the mic to nearest girl who sang the words loudly for him.

“From that emotio~n, Time to pick my heart up off the floor!” he twirled the microphone back to his hand and leaned heavily on his cane as he sang into it with all the moogle passion his tiny heart could muster.

“And when that love comes down wihto~ut devoti~on, well it takes a strong man baby, but I’m showing you the door,” he lept upon the discarded table that Satansfoot had broken and pumped the microphone to his adoring fans. “Sing it, kupo!”

“CAUSE I GOTTA HAVE FAITH!” they all shouted in a horrid chorus of sirens, their keys all off but everyone laughing and enjoying themselves.

[Disillusioned]

Troy rarely indulged in the pleasures of alcohol. To him, not being in full control of his senses was a risk that he was all to often unwilling to take. He did, however, occasionally indulge in a glass of wine. As he sat in his booth and swirled the glass, taking time savor the smell, he was proud that his senses were still fully intact. That's right, he was far from drunk.

The two beside him, on the other hand, were a different matter entirely.

"Troy! TROY!" Noel screamed into his ear. The girl who sat next to him was a tiny little thing with short blond hair and green eyes. "Sing a song for me!"

"Pssh. He'd just get up there and be all weepy Noel," Regal snorted. As he spoke, the man slapped Troy's back rather hard, causing him to almost spill his drink.

The three made for an interesting group. A whiny girl of eighteen years old (who was also as flat as the table the three sat at), a silent man of twenty-five (who was not at all weepy in his own opinion), and a loudmouthed man of twenty-seven. Personalities clashed; good times were had by all.

Noel also had a crush on Troy, which leads us to our next scene.

"Troy, if you'll sing for me, I'll sing for you..." Noel whispered (in her mind at least) to Troy as she ran her hand up the man's leg. As her whisper was closer to a high-pitched squeal, Regal promptly spat out his drink.

"I do not sing," Troy muttered as he grabbed a napkin from the table. "And I will not ask you to drink your entire drink Regal, as you are well on your sixth. However, I will ask that you refrain from spraying it all over my face."

Regal apologized as he flagged down a waitress in order to replace his drink.

"Come on Troy, I sing really, really, REALLY well..." Noel's statement was accompanied by licking Troy's ear. He recoiled slightly.

"That is quite all right," Troy responded as he finished cleaning himself.

"Cause you'd be all weepy. And emo. And sulky. And whiny. And a pansy. And a sissy. And a..." Regal continued to speak as the waitress brought him another drink.

"Are you quite finished Regal?"

"Naw. And your a loser."

"I sing really well Troy..."

"And your hair is like, a totally I'm-standing-in-the-rain-so-you-can't-see-my-tears style."

"I can sing in different positions Troy..."

"Plus you're a crybaby."

"High positions, low positions, backward positions...."

"And you have absolutely no sense of class."

"On top positions, underneath positions..."

"And I don't think you showered this morning either."

"Forbidden positions that are outlawed in certain parts of Althanas..."

A man can only take so much goading from an idiot, and can only be felt up by a drunk girl (who really wasn't that pretty) for so long.

"ENOUGH!" Troy shouted as he slammed his drink down. "I would have liked to enjoy myself quietly, but seeing as that is certainly not an option, I shall acquiesce to your damned request!"

"You said a bad word Troy," Noel said as she began to lean on him. "You should be punished."

"Naughty naughty Troy," Regal chimed in.

"Or do you want to be the one doing the punishment?" Noel whispered as seductively as she could (which was not very much).

"Regal. Move!" Troy demanded as he shoved Regal out of the way. He then quickly walked up to the bar, picked a song, and took the stage.

"Ah." Troy snapped his fingers. "Regal, if you could be so kind?"

"Your hat good sir!" Regal shouted as he flung Troy a fedora. Where it came from, who can say?

"All right then," Troy said as he caught the hat, twirled it about, and stylish placed it on his head (Noel positively swooned). "We begin."

"AAAOW!" Troy screamed as the music hit. "As he came into the window, it was the sound of a crescendo!"

Troy twirled about and began to move about the stage in a rather flamboyant manner that befitted the song.

"He came into her apartment, he left the bloodstains on the carpet!" The man was on fire.

"She ran underneath the table, he could see she was unable!" The song itself was, in a word, epic.

"So she ran into the bedroom, she was struck down, it was her doom!" He quickly began walking backwards while making it look like he was walking forwards, simply because it just felt right.

"Annie are you okay? So, Annie are you okay? ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE?" Troy finished his line with a twirl as he grabbed his hat.

"Take it Regal!" Troy shouted as he tossed the hat across the room.

[Unfulfilled]

Regal’s fist pumped into the air over the throng of screaming woman and cheering men, his fingers looping the rim of the hat as it spun lazily on his finger like it was meant to. His jacket collar immediately popped as he twirled on the spot and struck out his finger while grabbing his crotch and giving it a mean tug before he sang his tone a rhythmic harmony with Troy‘s voice as the man continued to sing and Regal became his back up, singing a ghostly chorus with him in time to the music.

“Annie are you okay? Will you tell us, you’re okay Annie? There’s a sign on the window, that he struck you a crescendo, Annie! He came into your apartment, there were bloodstains, on the carpet,” he did another twirl and crotch grab, before he as well moved towards the stage walking backwards like it was the natural thing to do.

“He came into your apartment, there were bloodstains, on the carpet! Then you ran into the bedroom, you were struck down, it was your doom!” Regal lifted himself to the stage, meeting Troy head on as the two grabbed the mic with a free hand, singing a rhythmic beat that made even the pantheon of the Thaynehood stop to watch and nod their heads.

“Annie are you okay? So Annie are you okay, are you okay Annie? Annie are you okay? So are you okay, are you okay Annie? Are you okay Annie, Annie are you okay?”

Troy thrust his hips to the right, his head tilted downwards as he took the mic. “You been hit by-”

Regal then took the mic back from Troy’s outstretched hand, his hips thrust to the left and leaning his back upon Troy’s. “You been struck by-”

Troy lifted his hand up and grabbed Regal’s hat and donned it one motion that could only be defined so perfectly by one word: smooth.

“A Smooth Criminal, OW!”

The crowd went wild as Regal and Troy both began to shimmy, their feet moving in the beat of the music. One leg lifted in front of the other, both men twirling at the same time letting their foot slide out in front again before kicking back and stepping so they faced profile to the audience. They both clapped their hands once in time, sliding forwards and lowering their hands downwards to the screaming audience. Troy’s hat gently glided down upon his arm bouncing onto one finger where he balanced it. With an effortless motion the hat went up in the air as Regal’s hand grabbed it, donning it in a picture perfect copy of the way Troy had done not moments earlier.

Both men hit their backs against the other as they continued their unique dance style for the audience, a devilish grin upon Regal’s face as he was having the time of his life.

[Disillusioned]

"Me next! Me next!' Noel screamed as she ran through the bar, shoving her way through patron and waitress alike. Up across the stage she stormed; the ferocity of the girl without breasts could not be stopped.

"Move it Regal!" She snapped as she elbowed the man in the face; the man hit the floor, the hat landed atop his face.

"So they-" Noel was interrupted by Troy tapping on her shoulder.

"Noel, you are not allowed to sing this song without this," Troy said as he knelt down and picked up the hat. "We must have standards, after all. Especially for this masterpiece."

Noel beamed as her crush placed the hat upon her head. Regal muttered something along the lines of "Tiny-Tits's elbow is as hard as her freaking breasts."

"Shut up Regal! So they came into the outway! It was Sunday, what a black day!" Noel sang as she twirled about the stage, exactly as Troy and Regal had done before her. She even took the time to properly adjust the hat as she sung.

"Mouth to mouth resuscitation! Sounding heartbeat, intimidation!" Troy sung as he stepped in front of Noel, who offered the fedora up to Troy. He donned the hat, did the walk of walks (some daresay a moonwalk, but such beauty appears in Althanas but once a millennium), and tossed the hat high into the air.

Regal caught it expertly as Noel and Troy made room for the man.

“Annie are you okay? So, Annie are you okay? Are you okay ANNIE?” Regal screamed as the hat graced his forehead. None could stop the trio; together they were invincible. Troy briefly thought about making a career change, but then dismissed the thought.

Ah, the path not taken.

“Annie are you okay?” Troy slid up next to Regal.

“Will you tell us that your okay?” Noel slid up next to Troy.

“There’s a sign in the window...” Regal started off, Troy took the next line.

“That he struck you! A crescendo Annie!” Noel followed suit.

“He came into your apartment!” The three traded off now; each sinning the song in perfect rhythm with one another.

“He left the bloodstains on the carpet!”

“Then you ran into the bedroom!”

“You were struck down!”

The three moved in complete sync. They twirled together, they moved together, hell, they even grabbed their crotches together.

At the same time that is. They grabbed their own crotches in sync. There was a firm “hands-off” policy between Regal and Troy, as well as one between Regal and Noel.

At this time, you may notice that a “hands-off” policy is not enforced between Noel and Troy. Is there crotch-grabbing between those two? We leave it to you to decide the answer to that question. Please bare in mind that poor Noel will be heartbroken if you decide that there isn’t.

“It was your doom!” The three sang in unison. As one, they twirled and snapped their fingers. They then pointed to the audience; it was clear what was expected.

“OKAY, I WANT EVERYONE TO CLEAR THE AREA RIGHT NOW!”

“AAAOW!” Troy shouted as he took the center stage. He then began a series of dancing that can only be said to involve grabbing his crotch, flamboyant gestures with his arms, and the best damn walking on Althanas.

“Annie are you okay?” Regal shouted.

“I don’t know!” Noel responded.

“Will you tell us that your okay?” Troy sang; the hat was rapidly being tossed between the three. Whoever was currently singing wore it.

“I don’t know!” Noel again.

“There’s a sign in the window!”

“I don’t know!”

“That he struck you, a crescendo Annie!”

“I don’t know!”

Together they dance, together they sang. It was harmony personified, it was magnificence incarnate. These three souls moved and danced with a perfection attainable only by a god. Actually, for those brief few minutes, they were gods.

Gods of the dance floor.

“Dad gone it!” Troy twirled and struck a pose. He snapped his fingers.

“You were struck down!” Regal stuck his pose. He snapped his fingers too.

“It was your doom Annie!” Noel slid in-between the two of them and struck her pose. She snapped her fingers as well.

“AAAOW!” The three shouted.

Final crotch grab.