Story: 5
Lack of a substantial introduction hurt, but conclusion and rising action was good.
Strategy: 7
Romanticized planeswalking. Love it.
Setting: 5
Flickered too fast between realms often, but the lovely descriptions made up for it.
Continuity: 3
I had little idea "when" this was. I knew after the war with Xem'Zund, but that's about it.
Interaction: 6
Threw in an extra point for excellent dialogue usage, but this was overall surprisingly average.
Character: 4
Tough at times to really distinguish her personality, and that hurt. Some points shone through, but overall I wish I could have seen more.
Creativity: 8
By far your greatest category. You have a unique way of describing and writing things, and while it can be confusing at times, don't stop.
Mechanics: 6
Few things weren't capitalized when they should have been, a couple run-ons, nothing huge but I caught them nonetheless.
Clarity: 4
If you can work on distinguishing your setting even more while planeswalking, this category can easily be higher.
Wildcard: 6
A surprisingly well-written speed post thread. I'm intrigued.
Final Score: 54/100
Mordelain gains 600 EXP and 100 GP's!
Spoils approved; the former pending RoG processing. Keep in mind Echo of the Heart will count towards your ability limit come level one.Echo of The Heart: Mordelain can, once per thread, listen to her heartbeat and send it out through the magic of the Troubadours, and be drawn to whichever of the nine worlds wants her the most. It will save her life, perhaps, or drag her closer to death, and can only be used moments before she is going to die (will not work in the Citadel or Dansdel).
Without Aid I Walk, Without Woe I Smile: Mordelain has lost her walking stave, and is temporarily unable to use her dances until she carves and blesses a new one. She can however hear and feel whatever it feels, and as such, has a temporary binding tie to Breen, and an over view of the city's main market district.
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