Round 1: Christoph Vs Symbiosis

[Symbiosis]

Hot lava like pain seared throughout his blood, boiling it as the sword still clutched inside his body deeply. As the magical effects continued to wear on the demon his vast strength began to wane. One clawed talon was uselessly dangling from his side, the other hell bent on squeezing the last bit of life out of this wizard who mocked him. All the while Symbiote continued to choke his life Baxter kept insistently asking the same questions over and over. Deep into his mind he echoed, until at last his words shuddered the Demon’s psyche as he felt his control over the body waning.

This was never the wizard, and per the rules of our deal I regain control. The manner in which Baxter spoke to the demon within his own mind was like a teacher scolding a student. Symbiote howled into the real world, his blood flecked lips spitting crimson drool onto the face of his foe as his tongue licked the air. His eyes narrowed as Symbiote sniffed the air, before he began to struggle against Baxter’s desires to regain control.

He’s up to something, Binky Boy! I can smell it in the wind and taste it! My teeth are vibrating with magical energies! Let me choke his life out before he completes his task! Symbiote begged as he placed all his demonic will into the crushing of the red leader’s throat. His eyes grew a bit foggy, a feeling of being shunted aside. Baxter’s essence warred with the demons for control, and in their struggle the arcane eldritch power cackled within the air, though it was not visible to any eye save the demons.

It’s the end of the deal, give me my body back!

He’s gonna kill us! Symbiote screeched as he watched the man’s hands raise ever so reverently, ever so methodically towards his skull.

I know, Baxter replied thoughtfully. This is the fastest way to get us the hell out of here! The demon continued to frantically spit and screech, like a stuck pig as the hands began to grip around his skull, fighting with him to gain a strong hold. The demon forced his will now into stopping this event from happening.

Stop being such a coward! Let’s kill him here and now! Baxter at last asserted the last of his will, much like before when Symbiote was toying with the female soldier, his eyes looking utterly lost. It was in that second of transition that spelled the doom of the demon host as a loud pop filled the air. The body that struggled let out a shuttering spasm, all the muscles rippling like a tidal wave. Then it went limp and grew heavy as the hulking form collapsed downwards, pinning his foe much in the way a dying man would drag down the sword that killed him.

The subconscious mind of Baxter was silenced, death having claimed his body, but the essence of the demon swirled around the Salvarian pen write, hissing as the black tendrils of his soul moved towards Baxter’s heart. The body started to change drastically, the bones snapping one last time as the presence that was the monster revered back into a normal, almost decent looking human being.

Fucking wizards… Symbiote hissed within Baxter’s still heart. Ever since the wizard placed me in this state I vowed to crush every one of them I find…and then you have the audacity to stand in my way? Symbiote took a moment to think about what just transpired before he laughed, loudly so all could hear the demon’s chuckle from the dead corpse.

“Ha! Guess I’m growing on you, Binky Boy. Okay then, you win.” With those final thoughts spoken aloud the demon nestled around Baxter‘s lungs and ribs like a bird settling in a nest before he too slumbered.

~*~*~

“The demon thing is dead! I don’t see the enemy leader standing sir!” A fresh recruit reported as the grizzled warrior sitting atop the war mount looked to the hill where he last saw the two fight. He lifted one hand up, and the ground seemed to rumble like the approach of thunder.

“I never thought he’d do it, but this is it! Prepare to charge! All forces, take spearhead formation! Let’s drive a wedge and split the army in two. Surge outwards and kill as many as you can. In our wake the shock troopers will do the rest. Archers, prepare volley fire and loose into the middle as soon as I yell charge. Right formation, prepare phalanx wall and make sure nobody flanks us! Move it, this is our only chance!’ Order after order was shouted down the pathway hidden behind a hill, as every warrior got ready. A solitary soldier, the same man who protected Baxter Arlington so he could make his way to the enemy leader lifted up a solid green flag.

He looked to his surrounding men and women and with a nod of appreciation he drew his sword upwards and pointed it towards the center of the army. “ALL FORCES, CHARGE!”

[Christoph]

With a final heave, Elijah pushed the dying demon off of him. The abomination writhed obscenely in the ashen mud, its very flesh and bones shrinking back to something surprisingly human. Belov had no eyes for demonic vicissitude. He pushed himself onto shaky feet, his supernatural strength fleeing his body as his weary mind lost focus on the spell. He had never felt so exhausted, not since... since the civil war in Salvar. He banished those dark memories.

In his still moment, the clamor of clashing soldiers washed over him again and the stench of blood and burnt flesh stung his nostrils. The smoke and dust from his previous arcane onslaught finally began to settle, allowing the sorcerer fleeting glimpses of the battle. Red-clad soldiers still held the base of the hill, shields locked and swords glistening with blood.

Then a rumble of pounding hooves thundered over the din of battle. Arrows flew overhead. The enemy at last began their offensive! He glanced around, trying in vain to glimpse their approaching foes.

“The green knights are charging!” he cried hoarsely, hoping the spearmen heard him. Hoping Jacob would hear. “To the banner!” Where was his sword? He needed-- A lance struck his head with a dull wet plotch, splattering his skull like a ripe melon.

* * * * *

“To the hill!” For the first time in his young life, Jacob voice gained a commanding edge. People listen when I tell them to retreat, he thought. My father would be so proud. As green knights swept the red forces from the low ground, Jacob urged his fellow soldiers up the hill, toward the banner that Elijah Belov had placed. Fatigue gripped him and his sword felt leaden in his hand, yet he could not relent. He refused to fail Elijah.

Up and up they ran, Jacob and perhaps fifty others -- remnants from a dozen units clustered together in the chaos of battle. He reached the hill’s summit as their enemies regrouped for their next assault. Jacob felt despair well up in his chest. It was folly! Fifty exhausted survivors against hundreds, including armored knights. Even with the higher ground they stood no chance.

Then, a brass trumpet sang out high and clear. Jacob looked for its source. A hundred meters away, from the red army’s side, came their general, at long last joining the fray. The battle lines had long since collapsed, but somehow their leader had assembled a few hundred soldiers and now marched toward the rocky hill. To Elijah’s banner! The banner would rally the red army, if only it could remain standing.

“We must hold this hill!” Jacob turned, relieving a fallen comrade of a spear. The other fifty lined up beside him, shields up as they faced down the hill toward their enemies. “We yield no ground!”

[Silence Sei]

Final battle I’m doing for Round 1! Yay for progress!

Christoph/Symbiosis


Story 5/5: The story had all the classic elements to a good story, but none of said elements had me wanting to cheer or boo one way or the other. If there was any major flaw with the story category, I’d say it was in both of your conclusions. The two of you left the story in sort of a ‘End before the final blow’ feel to it, and while it was decent, it would have had ore of an effect if you had focused on your ‘supporting characters’ a little more. Symbiosis is more guilty of this than Christoph (Who kept Jacob fresh in our minds), but not so much that he deserved a point lower.

Continuity 7/6: Both of you did well telling me your character’s histories, but I feel that Christoph’s motivation for being in this battle is what really won the day for me. Trying to reclaim his glory so he can go back to Salvar and man up also did a good job explaining how exactly he got there. Sym, you placed your character in the war chained, insinuating he was captured, but I never truly saw how he was captured, or why somebody thought it would be a good idea to put a merciless killer on their side during war games.

Setting 6/6: While it was a unique battlefield, it would have been more suited to a Gisela style match than a 1 on 1. The fact that the bulk of Sym’s posts involved fighting others rather than Eli just furthered that idea.

Creativity 7/6: ‘The Circle is a Lie’, sums it up nice for me, it was a clever ruse by Eli to fool his opponent, and it’s the reason you gained an extra point here. Sym, you have a unique character for Althanas (Though admittedly, not for Marvel Comics continuity, :P ) and I’d like to see you stray away from your source material more to not make me picture this Every time I read your posts.

Character 5/5: It was odd to see Eli not betray the people who had asked him to take part in the games by betraying his own troops. This is a guy who is willing to do practically anything to get what he wants, and I completely expected a post where Eli runs his sword through one of his own guys to try and bludgeon/stab Sym. Sym, what I would have liked to seen from you is more internal conflict; don’t misread me, you did a decent job reflecting Baxter’s reluctance, but I moreso expected Baxter to step in the –second- that he realized Eli was not the Wizard.

Interaction 4/5: Christoph, while you engaged with your opponent well, I’m afraid it’s the fact that you did not seem to take setting into account as much as Sym seemed to. Aside from pretty much 1 encounter, there was really no actual engaging of the army from Eli’s perspective. Hell, even if you had came down and incinerated everyone but Sym, that would have been something more to reward you for.

Strategy 6/6: Eli’s ruse with the circle was awesome, and the fact that both of the main characters died was a well thought out plot device by the both of you. War is hell, as they say.

Mechanics 8/4: This is what really killed ya, Sym. While Christoph had some minor spelling and grammar errors, you still made some of your common mistakes (a missed word here, using ‘to’ instead of ‘too’, etc etc). I hate beating a dead horse, but if you would engage in my ‘Three-Aloud’ strategy (Type-Read aloud, Spell check-Read aloud, Post-Read aloud), you could have tied, if not beaten Christoph. Christoph, you missed a word or two, and you even misspelled the name of your own PC. Though Jab co would be a kick ass company.

Clarity 5/7: Christoph, while most of your writing was clear, there was one or two areas I had to re-read in the beginning of your post. I also re-read your conclusion, but that was because I couldn’t believe a stray weapon killed Eli. Sym on the other hand, I could understand his actions much clearer, with an occasional slip up (With the sword piercing him, I had to re-read a paragraph or two, as an example). Sometimes simplicity is the key to a good clarity score.

Wildcard 6/6: Christoph’s head impalement got him an extra point when combined with ‘The circle is a lie.’. Sym, your extra point also comes from your finish, what with the split second that determined your duo’s fate.

Final Score:

Christoph: 59

Symbiosis: 56

Christoph gets 2850 Exp, 100 GP

Symbiosis gets 825 Exp, 200 GP.

Christoph Advances to Round 2!

[Silence Sei]

Exp/Gp Added.