Depression in my Dreams (solo)

[Gnarl & Root]

Okay, my first post in a while, lets hope it kick starts me back to life.

"Have you ever felt like your body just cannot take it anymore? I wonder what the point in continuing is, when all you believed, when all you felt turns out to be wrong. Is it wrong because it was never true? Or wrong because you were reaching for something that was never attainable, and therefore you only ever lied to yourself?"

Gnarl lay there static, a nettle amongst the red bloom of the roses. His body so numb he couldn't feel his heart beat. His head so riddled with thoughts and dreams, that even the reality of life around him, wouldn't return him to the real world.

Where was he? Alive? Dead? He wasn't quite sure at this moment. The bright everlasting glow of the summer sun was far from setting, and yet he lay under the dark grey of an invisible cloud that only his eyes could see. His mind lurking deep within his memories shadows, while his body phasing between the real world and that of a dark abyss within his heart.

He had never walked within this part of the world, while Corone was no longer completely unfamiliar to himself, this land was foreign and new. Laying within the moist green, he had christened it with his own tears, christened it with his own pain and sad memories. If he was to ever stand back up and look at this field, he would be reminded of what he once had, and his heart would ache with a pain beyond what any blade could cause.

He had travelled thousands of miles, met hundreds of people and loved just the one. How he could be effected in such a way as this felt beyond his understanding, and yet he felt it.

Another warm tear escaped his soft blue eyes, easing the sore red skin that surrounded his face. The release of pain that left with it was minor, but just enough to let him feel it leave his body and trail down his cheek before striking the grass. He remained motionless on his back, the spiked stems of the roses wrapped around him, arching around his arms, fingers and body. Slowly trying to cut into his skin as his own weight crushed them beneath his position. He lay sprawled in the dirt, his arms out wide like the wings of a fallen bird, while his legs crumbled uncomfortably over the grass and stones.

The beautiful blue of the sky reflected in the blue of his own eyes as he stared into nothingness, the hours passing like seconds and the seconds like they never existed in the first place. Time was irrelevant now, life was irrelevant now, living was irrelevant.

Had he come this far just to be crushed by her? Is this what the gods truly had in store for him? Have him survive a war. Have him lose his family. Have him watch his friends die. Only to be turned into a broken man by another person who didn't even need a knife to stab his heart. A knife would have been kind, it would have only hurt for a moment.

"I'm sorry Gnarl," whispered a consolable Root. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."

Those words rang around in his head, and his eyes tensed up shut as he tried to fight the flood of tears that rushed their way to the surface. His friend, his black and grey cat that had always been there for him, could not stop the inevitable surge of emotion that he would feel this day.

Gnarl was strong, proud and more than anything, a survivor. He had faced some powerful feelings before, so why did this hurt so much?

The usual light brown of his hair was now a dull boring brown, and the uplifting cyan of his kind eyes were a sore burnt blue that appeared to be slowly decaying into a colourless grey.

What's happened to me? Am I broken?

[Gnarl & Root]

She was his beginning and his end, like a punishment from the Gods to teach him a lesson he was failing to see. He wanted to hate the Gods for this, to lose him temper and shout at them with all of his might and pain. They could strike him down for the anger he wanted to throw at them, and yet his anger was dimmed, hampered by the pain from a loss of love. No anger could fight its way through this pain, for love was the most powerful of emotions that any man could feel, and once it had a hold of a man, its grasp was unforgiving.

"I think I only knew how much I loved her, when I lost her..."

Gnarl spoke as if Root could hear him and yet his tear hazed vision was unclear and untrue. Root could have been anywhere now, it's not like Gnarl had waited for him. He had stormed off, after not heeding his warnings and continuing to express his heart towards such a woman.

Was it worth it?

He tried to move, to clench his fist and release some energy beyond that of pure emotion. His fingers twanged, a slight flicker like the flame of a starting fire, yet his fist could not tighten. The throbbing headache remained at the forefront of his mind, trapping in the memories of her and the feelings he felt within the prison that was his mind. Where was she? Was she an unobtainable dream or was their time here just too late?

Gnarl remembered the good times, her beautiful blonde hair, her emerald like eyes and the ruby red luscious lips that caught every flicker of his wandering admiring gaze. This vixen of the greatest beauty, now only a vestige of his former love, one that didn't desire to stop loving and would plague his heart like a virus for years to come.

"You suddenly miss everything, things she probably didn't even realise she did...but it was all beautiful, every last moment. Where did it all go."

Root, his faithful feline. The black and grey companion who had travelled every road he had, be it on his shoulder, or standing by his side. He had always been there, through the good and the bad, and even if Gnarl hadn't yet realised it yet, he would never abandon him. He lay curled up upon Gnarl, and yet Gnarl could not feel him upon his chest, his usually fluffy tickling hair now unnoticed.

Root would wait for him, no matter how long it took, and if he needed time to break through the pain, Root would be there for when he needed him. Sometimes the heart needs to weep to let itself be whole again.

[Gnarl & Root]

Gnarls eyes rolled back and closed, the sudden twitching expressions a flicker of a daunting dream or meaningful memory. That day he met her, that wonderful day, it had started so bland, so bitter and boring. Yet from the moment he saw her, from the moment she graced his vision, the day became as beautiful as any other. He would never forget this day.

"Camille!" A lady called. Oh how he loved the sound of her name as it left someone's lips.

She was stood there, her dainty form masked by her insecurity and pain. She was hurting, crying inside, even if she did her very best to hide it from the rest of the world. Gnarl wasn't the only one who saw her that day, shaking, bleeding, hurting. Yet he was the only one who connected to her pain, he understood, he accepted her for who she was.

I'd never had let you fall

She fainted. As sudden as it hit, she fell backwards towards the hard oak floor, but Gnarl would never let her beauty be tainted by the dirty booze ridden floor of the tavern. He was never sure how he managed to move that distance so quick, but he did it, and he caught her gracefully within his caring arms.

"Careful now...You're okay."

There she was, a Goddess within his very arms, saved and protected from the evil of the world around them. He was her shield, her protector, her lover and her soul mate, all in that single moment. Just neither of them knew it yet. This was to be a love undeniable.

She would be shy at first, holding back and nervous towards the future love of her life. Yet he was no different, he was just as nervous and shy as he sat before her prowess of beauty. Those blonde locks were almost levitating as she sat before him. Her bushy curly fresh locks were full of life, glowing like an angel of the Gods, she was perfect and she didn't know it.

"Thanks again for catching me..." Her soft voice uttered nervously, a little flicker of her eye lashes quickly followed by a coy bite of her luscious lips. Those bites would soon become as lustful as he could ever imagine.

"You're welcome. Don't worry about them," he tried to comfort her every concern. "Most people fear before they wonder."

"People should be afraid of the things they don't understand."

Should I have been afraid? What did she truly mean by that? Was it a warning from the very beginning that I failed to listen to?

Gnarl could feel his heart beat begin to raise in tempo, his chest tight and intense as his heart raced with anxiety. Was this all just a lesson in love and pain? Why must he learn it this way?

"Goodbye Gnarl." She whispered silently. A faint tear in her eye, something only Gnarl would notice.

"What? This never happened," Gnarls heart raced even greater than before. This was fake. This was a lie and it never happened. Gnarl remembered it differently. She never left, at least not here. "Come back! Don't leave!"

Yet it wouldn't matter how much he begged, she had left, she wasn't coming back, and the image of her leaving would be seared into his mind.

His eyes shot open again, leaving only the tearful view of the blue sky once more. His heart continued to race so powerfully it was painful, but he couldn't shake it, he couldn't lose the pain. What were these? Memories? Nightmares?

Whatever they were, he wished they would just leave.

[Gnarl & Root]

"GNARL!" Roots familiar voice called out to him. "Get up. You cannot stay here like this. You cannot rest within the pool of your own misery."

Gnarl looked down to Root. Sitting concerned upon his chest, feeling every heart beat of emotion that he felt deep down inside. Root may not have been able to hear Gnarls thoughts, but he could feel his memories as they vibrated through his heart.

Raising his arm, Gnarl wiped his sore hand across his pain filled eyes. His lips trembled as he tried to respond to Root, but no words could escape his dry mouth. He urged himself forward, pushing himself up into a sitting position as Root hopped down beside him. quickly rubbing himself lovingly against his arm, while letting his long tail tickle up and just under his chin.

"Time heals all wounds Gnarloc. You need to let her go. You need to survive by yourself."

Gnarl took a deep breath, even just a simple hint of her existence seemed to make him whimper. Yet in all his haze of emotion, he couldn't even remember what had happened. Did she leave him? Did she die? Was she captured or lost? What was it that had made him this way?

Where are you? I do not remember...My mind is a mess...All I know is...I miss you...

It hurt to think, it hurt to remember, to understand or contemplate what was going on with him, but he needed to know, he needed to understand. He had not slept in days, and food had become a rarity. For how long had he been like this? Could he really have forgotten? Or was his mind hiding the truth on purpose to protect him from what the truth, in fact, was?

"I need you to listen to me Gnarloc. You're caught in a riptide of emotions, searching for the truth, for that reason you have ended up here."

"There must be a reason Root!" Gnarl called out. "There must be something."

"What do you think you're going to find? Searching through these endless dreams and memories? I can guarantee you, it won't be the answers you wish to find. There's only pain in there."

"If that's true Root...Is that what I am destined for? To suffer in silence until I die, alone."

"I'll always be by your side my friend."

Gnarl placed his head in his hands and sobbed. The wailing of a broken man, a broken heart who no longer knows where to look. Root watched him in silence, the inability to say anything that could change how his friend hurt. He hated to see it, he hated that he could do nothing but sit there, but sit there he would.

Suddenly, Gnarl leapt up to his feet. Sniffling with his emotions, wiping away the tears with his forearm, and staring out into the overgrown field. The lush green of plants, both flowers and grass, complimented by the many bushes and trees that made the fields border, were all invisible to him. His vision peered beyond that of what stood before him, his eyes still locked in the world of nightmares, but this time, if only for a moment, he lost his temper.

"FUCK YOU!" He screamed up into the sky. His face intense and grimacing like having his heart ripped from within him. "IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT FOR ME?!"

Gnarl gripped his shirt tightly, pulling furiously on its as he dug his fingers in over his heart. His finger nails cutting into his skin through his shirt, but he felt no pain.

"YOU BROUGHT ME THIS FAR! YOU BROUGHT ME TO THIS PAIN, TO THIS....THIS LOVE. WHY WOULD YOU FATE ME WITH THIS? YOU'RE ALL BASTARDS! SELFISH CRUEL BASTARDS!"

His balance wavered as he leant back and stared up at the Gods in the sky above, waiting for some great vengeance to strike him down and end his torment. Somehow though, he remained stood, wobbling and jittering about like a drunken hobo.

What is the point in living, if you cannot feel alive anymore.

Yet no matter how he shouted. There was no answer, no mighty strike to kill him, no almighty death to end his blasphemy.

[Gnarl & Root]

Gnarl looked down at his hands, they were shaking, his fingers uncontrollable as wave after wave of pins and needles tingled through his arms. This wasn't just like lying on his arm for hours, this was painful, sharp tingles that didn't disappear after a few moments. He clenched his fist, his fingers still shaking, he tensed his grip, weak and fragile.

Where has my strength gone?

Gnarl suddenly dropped back to his knees. Those heavy eyes, those tired legs, shaking hands and confused mind. He had to fight it, but part of him didn't want to. His minds trauma so strong it dragged his body back down into the dirt, like he was falling head first into his own grave.

Come on Gnarl...Get up...

It was that moment he could feel the hard cold stone in his right pocket. The blunt object pushing into his thigh; his link to the Gods, his compass, his life's direction. It had taken him everywhere. It had taken him through all of life's difficulties. It had taken him to, her.

He gripped it tightly in his hand, slid it out of his pocket and glared at it. The warm stone held no expression, no personality or friendship with Gnarl. Yet it had meant so much to him, it had allowed the Gods to direct him, to instruct him and to continue his life. It was a conduit to the skies above, and only Gnarl could hear their words.

"All I ever wanted...all those secrets..." Gnarl muttered desperately towards the stone in his hand. "What did you really want of me? What truth have you really held from me? I hate you!"

Gnarl held it overhead, then looking across the field, he launched it into the air. The fist sized stone flying alone through the breeze for the first time since Gnarl had picked it up. The first time he had let go of it, the first time it has left his possession, the first time.

There was an emptiness about him as it left his grip. Those voices that had spoken to him for so long, were no longer there, and he had to accept that by throwing it away, he was giving up a part of him that he had lived with for most of his life.

"What did you expect?" Her soft voice called out.

"I didn't expect you to turn away."

Her hand stroked his cheek, guiding him to her gaze. She was angry, hurt, but he couldn't see past the anger within her eyes. Staring back at him with a hatred that he had never seen before, did he really deserve such a look? Maybe.

"What are you thinking, Gnarl?" Her words burned his ears.

"Do you hate me?" His eyes dropped as he couldn't look her in the face.

"I don't think you want me to answer that question, do you?"

"GNARLOC!" Roots voice called out from behind him.

"I'm afraid of the answer...I'm afraid you do hate me..."

"GNARLOC! WAKE UP!"

He looked back up to her, his heart pounding away as he watched her lips, those beautiful lips and how they were about to utter those words he feared the most.

"GNARLOC!"

His eyes opened again.

There he was, lying on the floor, again. Had he fainted? Collapsed? Fell asleep? It wasn't clear, but he had lost consciousness, at least for a moment. It was like his mind was decaying and his body was just going to follow suit.

Watching him from above, that familiar sky, staring down at him, now burdened with dark clouds for real, hovering, waiting to unload their watery stock upon the land below.

Then, it began to rain.

[Gnarl & Root]

When it usually rained in Corone it was long slow light rain, the most common of rain that left the land fresh and fertile, but as the first few drops struck his face, he could tell this was different. The hard heavy rain drops were ready to flood the fields in one mighty rainfall.

The soft satisfying taste of the first few drops touched his dry lips, the fresh clear rain was the first drink he had taken lately and it was glorious. His tender dry lips now blessed with a wealth of moisture that felt like as if it revived his dying skin.

Quickly, like a river bursting its banks the rain engulfed the landscape. Gnarl shielded his eyes and rolled over, his smart leather attire soaking in every raindrop until it could take no more. His hair drenched into a soppy skin sticking mess, and for every drop his hands blocked, another slipped its way through his fingers. His vision remained impaired, but no longer from tears.

Lifting to his knees he wiped his face again with both hands, the cold rain refreshing and relieving at the same time. All dirt from the rain sodden ground instantly washed off him, and he opened his mouth to take in the falling water.

Strangely, it calmed him, it always had done. The tapping, slapping, splashing noise of the falling rain as it struck everything in the world shut out his internal thought. The wet cold and refreshing feeling it gave him as it ran over his face and body, revived him, stopping his shaking and relaxing his hurting heart.

What am I doing...

"Gnarloc..." Root looked distressed, already rain sodden and unimpressed. "Please get up."

"Okay."

The first word he had uttered in a positive manner, it might not have been much, but it was a start. Root darted with a prance like run across the field, his grey tail flicking up with each jump as he dashed towards the nearest tree for shelter. Gnarl followed slowly. His walk, an unsteady slow wander that felt no desire to hurry from the wet.

He looked at his hands, they weren't shaking, his fingers cold and wet but steady. He clenched his fist, squishing a few droplets from his grip, calm and collected. There was no more painful tingles, no more fret and panic, just peace and calm. At least for now.

Gnarl paused in the grass, a drenched Root staring out at him from under the shelter of the large old beach tree before him. Gnarl looked down at his hands again, clenching them tight as he felt some strength return to him.

A large roar of thunder shook the skies above, the clouds themselves vibrating with joy to the beginning of a storm.

A second roar came as Gnarl looked up at the skies in anticipation.

Have I made you angry? Or are you cheering for my revival?

A third rumble came, so powerful it appeared to shake the trees, but Gnarl did not fear it, for this had to be the Gods talking to him. Only Stoney could tell him what they were saying, thinking, feeling about his outburst. Yet it lay out in grass behind him somewhere.

"GRRRRAAAAAAAAAARRRR!" Gnarl roared back at the skies as a forth thunderous rumble called out. "I AM GNARLOC, AND I REFUSE TO LAY DOWN ANYMORE!"

With that outburst over, Gnarl stepped into the trees shelter. It was here he could feel the cold again, the breeze of the storm whirling around the thick tree truck and giving him a mighty shudder.

"Are you okay?" Root asked concerned by Gnarls off behaviour.

"I..." Gnarl caught his breath a moment, the cold and shouting taking a toll. Then sat down on the thick bending root of the tree, facing out into the rain. "I think I need to be okay...But I'd like to enjoy the rain for now."

[Gnarl & Root]

Root didn't always listen in on their conversations, but it would be a lie to say he was never nosy. Tonight had been one of those nights, lusty, loving, flirtatious fun. They were good at it together, in a sync that others could only dream of. Finishing one another's sentences was just the start, they seemed to bond and collect one another within everything they said and did.

Root had finally got bored of listening in, his eyes drifting dreamily into a light snooze. His heavy eyelids soon shut and his body fell limp within his small curled up position. He hadn't had a permanent bed in years, so dropping off in random places had become the norm.

Yet even within his sleep, his ears picked up everything, he was after all a cautious sleeper.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Gnarls defensive voice sounded full of alarm.

Roots ears picked up like a radar, his eyes instantly fired open and his head raised as he tried to take in exactly what was going on.

"You're taking this wrong Gnarloc..." Camille replied unimpressed with his reaction.

She folded her arms defensively, a little confused at his outburst, but expecting a lighter reply.

"Is that what you truly think of me?" He snapped, his kind eyes fiery and enraged.

He heart raced, but not with excitement or love. Now replaced with anger and frustration, surprise and revelation. He nervously knocked back his short brown hair, his eyes edging on pure rage, ready to shout and hate. His breathing heavy, he remained sat opposite her at the table, staring and waiting for something from her to say other than what he now believed.

"I don't have time for this...this jealously..." She shook her head, her lips pert but disgusted. "Why did you have to ruin this moment?"

"Me?"

The argument scaled up, a disgruntled discussion became a shouting match, and Gnarls angry strike of the table with his fist, made even Root leap up to his feet. Root quickly scuttled across the landing, pausing only at the top of the balcony, pressing himself up against the wood of the banister as his yellow eyes peered down at them. Hearing all the pain that they both felt inside, but none better than as Gnarl verbalised his every thought.

"I thought we were better than this? Am I nothing to you?"

He had never seen them like this, never heard the venom in their voices, never felt the vibrations of physical anger. Both of them broke down into a deep raw emotion; they couldn't hide their pain from one another, they couldn't hide their dissatisfaction that this was all happening, they couldn't hide the fact that neither of them wanted this to happen, and yet, it was.

Why...? Root thought to himself. Why put yourselves through such pain...

"Say something..." Gnarl asked one final time. His heart giving up on this love.

It was awkward being that third individual, that pair of ears that listened to every word and saw every tear. Gnarl had never looked so upset, and even if Camille tried to hide it she hurt deeply. Root had assumed by this point they were locked in love, locked in passion and belief in one another. This was all a surprise.

He wanted to say something, but he couldn't.

He wanted to intervene, but he couldn't.

He wanted, but he couldn't.

"I'd have followed you anywhere, Camille...Anywhere."
Gnarl stormed out, no final swearing or shouting before heading off into the rain outside. Yet slamming the door thunderously as he did. He never grabbed his belongings.

Camille remained silent for a moment, still sitting shocked at the table. Then, broke down into tears and distress. Root had never seen Gnarl make her cry before, was this the end?

Then against the emotion of the room, a little giggling. A high pitched chuckle that caught the now twitching ear of Root. This wasn't either of them, but another voice.

Root looked around the open room. Camille centered at the table, the fireplace alone but burning, and the kitchen untidy but again empty. He sniffed the warm still air.

What the? Who is it?

Then, there in the corner, sat, almost rolling on its back, laughing and giggling to itself, a miniature man. Barely the size of Root, up top a long but short wooden shelf that hinged high up the wall. Root paused in surprise, the cheek of such a thing was not lost on him, but the fact such a small man existed within their room seemed bizarre.

There he was, his hands on his bare stomach as he tried to control his laugh and nothing but a small black mask that covered the top of his face. Root, agile as ever, leapt from the banister onto the nearest shelf. Moving silently like a shadow, he slipped around the old ornaments, not even unsettling the dust. Slowly encroaching on the tiny naked amused man.

Leaping the short gap between shelves, Root landed gracefully, but he finally drew in the attention of the stranger. Startled, he jolted back bumping into the small vase and then wall like a clumsy oaf.

"You can see me?" He questioned to the locked on focus of the black and grey feline.

"Shouldn't I be able to?" Root questioned curiously.

[Gnarl & Root]

The intrigue between the two grew as they stared at one another, an awkward silence as if to out wait the other. Root's yellow feline eyes locked onto him like an eagle to its prey, yet the little plump mans posture slowly changed, and slowly relaxed from the tense shock of his discovery.

"You are no normal cat..."

"...And you are not...Well, I'm not entirely sure what you are." Root didn't relax his tense pose, still prepared to pounce on his mystery opponent should the need arise.

"Come join me," the fat man invited him over. "This moment couldn't be any more delicious."

Oddly the strange tiny man licked his moist lips, he was enjoying this, his mouth munching as if eating, gorging on a great amount of fattening food. He rubbed his belly, which rumbled greedily, even with Roots presence beside him, he didn't seem to fear him at all.

"I don't understand, what are you doing?"

"I am feeding, enjoying, watching this glorious treat unravel itself to me. It is so powerful, so strong, I have never found one as such, and it has so much more to give me!" There was something scary about the way he talked, the enjoyment in his voice, the way he continued to lick his sticky lips, and the pleasure that seemed to shine from those hidden eyes behind the black mask.

Slowly, Camille walked in distress across the room, timidly shutting the door to the kitchen behind her. Each foot step laden with sorrow, each tear filled with sadness, her bright blonde hair had never looked so dull, and the beautiful hue of her blue eyes no longer shone.

Now only Root remained with the odd little man.

So the man continued passionately, "they are filled with so much love and infatuation that I might never need another pair. I usually crush them, bit by bit, argument by argument. Yet it is so strong and delicious it just fires out from them like an erupting volcano. I couldn't ever imagine controlling such raw emotion."

"So, you're saying you, are doing this? I don't understand."

"Of course I am! I am a Faint!"

"A Faint?" Root quizzed confused. This was something he had never heard of before.

"Yes, I feed on the sorrow of others." He smirked as he explained. "What's even better than that? I find couples in love, and then I plant a seed of doubt in their mind. Then, all I need to do is watch them spiral out of control and...and...It makes me feel, wonderful."

Root hated that little smile, that enjoyment of pain and suffering he was feeding on, Root despised it. "So you are manipulating their emotions?"

"Yes. Humanoids are so easy to manipulate. So tasty and delicious. I really couldn't have found a bett..."

"SHUT UP!" Root interrupted wildly, flashing his sharp teeth and flexing his claws against the surface wood.

"You care for these humans?" He paused in astonishment, and turned to face Root properly for the first time. "I never suspected a cat would actually care...Especially for the female. I've watched you for a while you know. Waited for my moment to come, and I've noticed you and the female do not get a long."

It was true, Root had always been cautious of Camille, she was half wolf after all, in actual fact he had always feared what her presence would mean to Gnarloc. They had scowled at one another, refused to greet or talk and hated one another from a distance. But time had passed since then, they had been civil, and she really had made his best friend, Gnarloc, happy. Root had without knowing it, slowly grown closer, and respected her.

"Leave, both, of my friends alone!" Root hissed as stern as he could.

"Or else what? You might be able to see me, but I'm n..."

Root pounced, powerfully and purposefully as he slashed out at the Faint. Ornaments clumsily crashed down to the floor as a vase shattered on contact with the ground. The tiny Faint leapt up into the air, almost hovering for a moment before landing precariously on the next shelf.

He ran his chubby fingers over his cheek, four shallow but painful cuts streaked across his face, and a blue coloured blood now trickled free. The Faint had received his warning.

"You really are no normal cat."

"...And you are a fool for explaining what you are to me. Return them to normal, or I'll kill you."

"Fortunately for me, I can't." The Faints mouth grimaced. "You're, friends, have to resolve this themselves. But good luck with that one, I'm yet to see it happen."

Root flashed his teeth once more, but like a mirage the Faint slowly stepped back and vaporised into nothing. The little man, plump and greedy, selfish and careless of what he had done, was now gone.

Root sat still; waiting, watching, listening, but the Faint never reappeared. No matter how long he waited, no matter how long he watched over Camille, neither the Faint or Gnarloc returned.

It was time to go find Gnarloc.

[Gnarl & Root]

Gnarloc sat there, his mind occupied by the ambience of the falling rain. Like a pouring waterfall nothing avoided its touch; drowning every leaf of the overhead tree, washing clean every blade of grass, and slowly eroding every rock and stone that lay upon the landscape.

Gnarl had always found something beautiful about the rain, yet again it was relaxing his mind, reminding him that the good times were worth remembering. He found some odd link between the rain and the memories he loved the most.

He remembered running through the rain, chasing and laughing with Camille as they raced for shelter from the down pour. He remembered sitting around the candle lit table for dinner, when the rain outside would tap against the window pane, and her smile would shine brighter than the candle between them.

He remembered the way his heart beat for her, and the way his blood warmed when her received her touch. Her beautiful blue eyes were always brighter in the rain, like a lighthouse in the dark, she shone ever brighter than ever before.

It was these memories, these feelings and thoughts that he truly believed in.

It wasn't surprising that the cold had finally reached him, and a shiver jolted up his spine like lightening clinging to the clouds. Root shoved his way in under Gnarls arm, cold and wet, he huddle up to Gnarls chest while taking a seat on Gnarlocs lonely lap. Gnarl smiled and carefully wrapped his arms around his feline friend.

"Stay to close to me, Root. I won't let you be cold."

It was an embrace only true friendship would understand. Cold, wet and shivering but willing to provide each other with what little warmth they could muster. Gnarl stroked the wet from Roots black and grey fur, the loose hairs sticking to his damp fingers, leaving the smell of damp cat upon them. Then pulling him in close, Gnarl ensured his friend would not feel anymore of the wind or rain.

Root closed his eyes in comfort. Already feeling the warmth as Gnarl sheltered him better than any room could. Root took a long deep breath, enclosed in Gnarls arms he began to feel something other than the wet as the warmth gradually worked its way in. He felt strangely guilty about the whole thing. Not that it was his fault, but because he couldn't tell him the truth. He didn't need to open his eyes see what Gnarls expression would be should he tell him what he saw. The truth now, it meant nothing.

It wasn't about if Gnarl would believe him or not, it was about accepting another truth. A truth that there had been a small shadow of doubt deep within his mind, and something had managed to manipulate it into their separation. When it came to love, Gnarl was soft at heart, and if he knew that it was all caused by something deep within him, he could blame himself forever.

At least that's what Root feared. This way, however painful, they shared the blame from one another.

[Gnarl & Root]

It took some hours for the rain to pass, but they remained huddled beneath the great Birch tree. Sheltered beneath its branches until the storm passed, and along with it, the pain of Gnarls sorrows. The grey clouds had dispersed, the wind lessened but now carried the scent of the damp foliage of the fields. Then finally, the sun peered its way over the horizon of the distant mountains and started the slow process of warming the world once again.

Gnarl lifted his cold head, a few droplets of rainwater still leaking from his soaked hair. Roots ear flicked and twanged as he knocked off the fallen droplet. He felt relatively dry, shielded well by the warm caring body of his human ally and friend Gnarl. He stretched across his lap, reaching out with his front paws and stretching his claws as he awoke from his snooze.

He leapt off Gnarls warm lap as they stood, the wet ground not the most pleasant to walk on. He could feel the mud between his toes, and it tickled as he stepped forward. Evidently he had become too accustomed to riding on Gnarls shoulders during their travels.

"I am going to go find her."

His words were calm and precise.

"Excuse me?" Root almost shouted. "Has the cold gone to your head?"

"No my friend. I feel like it has refreshed me though."

"I think you need to take your time. You're making hasty emotional decisions."

"I can't attest to that. All I can tell you is I've felt the pain in my heart, I've experienced the depression in my dreams, and I know that everything I feel, tells me I'm doing the wrong thing. I feel I should find her, make things right. I want to make things right."

His voice has lost that croaky tone, that sore throat, tightened with emotion, now loosened. His eyes, still hurt, but tearless. He brushed back his hair and stepped out into the field once more. He had wasted enough time here, trying to understand, trying to resolve the pain and emotion that welled deep within his heart and soul.

There was only way to fix this, one way to make things right within himself. He had to find her, he had to fix not just his, but her broken heart.

If I feel like this, I cannot imagine how she must feel.

This wasn't a quick fix, this wasn't a perfect happy ending, not yet. This was however, a start in the right direction. Being this way; alone, separated, hurting. It felt unnatural, if everything within himself wanted to be back with her, then he believed it must be true, it must be fate.

Gnarl stood over Stoney. The dull bland grey rock that could easily be mistaken for just any other rock, lay in the wet of the field. Only he could notice the difference, it's shape, its grey shade, it's smooth texture. He had thrown it away in anger, but in that fit of rage he knew just that. It was just a fit of rage. His love for Camille has pushed him over the edge, but he couldn't just throw everything away, not now.

This was just the beginning.

"Camille, I'm coming for you."