Gum

Story – 5/10 (You had a strong start to the thread. I liked how Gum was literally thrown into the action. I was also overjoyed when the Xangu people were finally freed. That said, the rising action and climax of the thread were too much. It was like reading an episode of Naruto. You employed a deus ex machina in the form of a character we have no relationship with in the four corners of the story to defeat mecha Fordstein. It was too over the top in the short amount of time it was developed.
Pacing- 7/10 (This was one of your strongest categories. This was an easy read. The story flowed well).
Setting – 5/10 (Of all the threads, you probably spent the least amount of time describing the setting. Where you did touch on Reijhaam, you did well, but it was clear you emphasized pacing and action over story)
Action – 7/10 (Mecha Fordstein winging weather; ancient spirits tearing apart islands. Go big or go home, I suppose).
Dialogue – 7/10 (I didn’t add commentary to the other dialogue categories because they were all on the same page. You, on the other hand, heavily relied on dialogue to drive the action of the story. Except for some ridiculous puns, this was done well).
Persona – 5/10 (Gum’s relationship with A’lia was written well. It wasn’t as personal as Phry’s relationship, but I appreciated how you had the characters come together to achieve their mutual goals. Their meeting seemed entirely realistic. Fordstein randomly deciding to insert the Thunderbox into his chest cavity made him a powerful, but not interesting villain. Similarly, Festerslash’s reprieve was unnecessary. I did not get the impression there was a budding relationship between the two.
Mechanics – 8/10 (Strong mechanics. I forgave your British spelling even though you’ve been American for years now. I didn’t give you a perfect score because I caught a few spelling errors. I also note you have a rhythmic approach to sentence structure when excluding dialogue. You should mix this up to impact the flow of the writing.
Technique – 5/10 (The deus ex machina was a bit over the top, but I did see some decent foreshadowing and metaphor usage)
Clarity- 8/10
Wildcard – 10/10 (All factors met)

Total- 67/100

Rewards will be added at a later date.