Here's my solution: Put mario with that water thingy from Sunshine in one of the Silent Hill games and see how it works out.
Mario: Mama mia--HOLY SHIT IT HAS NO ARMS!!!
StraightJacket: Aaaaghahahjflsjfjashsdfg! (Translation: Oh my God, someone please scratch my back!!)
Pyramid Head:...*slowly disects mario piece by piece*
See? A solution! ^^