Son of a... The question I hoped would never come up in conversation. Think, Maddy! Think!
I pursed my lights tightly. "I'm just a wandering soul who wants to do what's right, you know?"
The look in Caitlin's eyes said that she was looking for something more substantial. Something to connect with me on. Perhaps she was secretly trying to measure me up to try and convert me or something?
"I've been... I've had a rough go at it these past couple years," I said in a manner of half-truth. I opted to go with a slight bastardization of my own story, with names changed to avoid incrimination and deflect the darkest truths of my tale. I chose my words carefully to inspire pity rather than wrath. "I've traveled the world," I began, "taking on small jobs here and there, searching for a place to belong... I've done some horrible things. I've killed for money and revenge. I've stolen. I've lied. But, I've tried so hard to turn my life around."
I glanced over at Caitlin, whose eyes were unreadable. "I honestly have. I've done what I could to atone for some of my sins... These past two years or so, I've walked the world, doing what I can to help save it."
The voice returned. "Liar. Coward," it taunted.
Looking over at Tomas, I saw he was lying on his side with his back to us, his arms curled up underneath his head. "Don't you worry, I will end you soon enough."
My attentions went back to the Cleric of Draconus before me. "I was there during the Coronian Civil War--do you remember those times? I went to Eiskalt during their recent struggles with the plague, joining up with the aid organizations that were offering food and medicine to those affected by the blight."
"The only aid you offered them was a swifter death."
"How about I offer you a bullet to the back of your head?"
Caitlin simply nodded. "An honorable cause, to be sure," she offered. "But... I sense that there is far more to your story than you let on."
Oh great, here we go. A small bead of sweat formed on my forehead.
She drew closer to me, putting a gloved hand on my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me. "I sense a... a sort of darkness deeply rooted in your soul."
Oh fuck, she knows.
"It is a darkness that I have never felt before. As much as you try to fight it, it doesn't let go. It holds you tight, eating away at you with each passing day."
I tried to deflect her just a bit. "Are you certain that it's not my guilt from my past actions? Because, you know, that shit has hung heavy on my heart for so long."
The cleric shook her head in disagreement. "No. I can certainly sense something... more. It's a darkness that I have never encountered in my service to the Dragon Lord." She took hold of my other shoulder and turned me around to face her completely. I felt every fiber of my being wanting nothing more than to push her away. My mind screamed that this woman was suddenly very dangerous, if she could sense the corruption that Podë's gifts left in me. I wanted to get away. I wanted to spray acid into her face. My lungs began filling with the vile blight that had murdered thousands of innocent people.
Tomas's voice echoed in my mind once more. "Hey. Hey, Agent." I ignored his calls this time.
Caitlin's voice dropped to just above a whisper. "I can save you, Nadia. We can save you. Draconus is a kind god, and a forgiving god. This darkness that weighs heavy on your heart, this guilt of your transgressions... His love can dispel it. You don't have to continue walking the path you're on, searching for forgiveness through small actions."
It's far to late to save me. Those words were on the tip of my tongue when the both of us heard the soft rattling of bushes nearby. At first, I thought it might have been the breeze--but then I heard another noise accompanying it. I recognized it immediately, and suddenly my heart found itself firmly lodged in my throat.
The boy's laughter was shrill as it pierced my mind. "Our mistress sends her regards, Madison Freebird!"