Thanks for being patient guys. Lye has asked me to jump in and judge round one. I just have a few preliminary things to go over first. Because no threads achieved 10 posts, I'll be using the condensed rubric. I did markdown individual category scores if you want to know them, but I'll only be provided generic commentary here. Per Lye, I also did not factor in activity into scoring. Finally, and most importantly, don't be alarmed by the low scores. A good story requires a beginning, middle and end. Your story barely started. Character scores factor in interaction. There was very little. In other words, be proud of your work, because everyone was trending well had the threads continued.

Kitsune
Story - 10/35 - No one appreciates a "take over Althanas with a cryptic underground society" storyline more than I do, but it was difficult to get involved. The setting was boring and you used half of your first post to set it. Pacing of the story was fine, but the pacing of the writing made posts drag on. More on this later, but vary your sentence structure a bit more.
Character- 11/35 - You introduced a number of new players without context into your story. Though it wasn't abundantly clear by Shinsou, it was my understanding that the drunks were the Castigars (i.e. units) rather than NPCs so killing them may have been bunnying. Because it was unclear I did not punish you for this, but in the future keep in mind that the judge won't necessarily read the discussion thread for more information. Otherwise, action was just some troop movement.
Writing - 14/30 - I didn't notice many grammatical errors, but you need to work on varying sentence structure to control the pace of your writing. Commas should also be added for natural breaks in reading.

Total - 35/100

Shinsou
Story - 10/35 - I enjoyed how your introduction played off of Kitsunes in that put yourself well after the initial carnage. It was clever and unexpected based on the first post. Beyond that, adding rain was a solid touch, but there was little more. Your pacing was marred by putting too much content into two posts, though this might have been remedied should the action have picked up.
Character - 13/35 - Solid dialogue with good pacing. I didn't particularly appreciate your meta jab at smut (particularly given you literally made the "whore" a child), but I suppose it worked within the confines of the post. Your action was subtle, making the thread potentially breathe as a cat and mouse. This probably would have paid dividends in a completed thread.
Writing - 18/30 - Your writing was clear. Run-ons were the difference between your score and the highest of the round.

Total - 41/100

Shinsou advances!

Thanks to Kitsune for participating and being active. Lye has not let me know how he plans to handle rewards, but I will add them when I get word.